Aaron marched over to Evan. “What the fuck is going on?”
“What do you mean?” Evan said trying to stifle a laugh.
“What the fuck did you say?” Aaron was now seething with anger.
“I just wanted to know what that little girl is doing here? She didn’t get enough of you last night, so she came back for more? I guess she doesn’t know the rules of the game. Score and move on. Right, Aaron? Or maybe she’d like to give some of the other guys in the house a piece?”
I suddenly felt like I was watching something that wasn’t real. At least, I hoped it wasn’t real. Could I really have been that stupid? Did it even matter that we didn’t have sex? Those guys already had their minds made up about both me and Aaron.
When Aaron looked at me, his expression was so pained, it pierced my heart. I knew I loved him but I also knew that I couldn’t be with someone, who lied to me. He looked me in the eye and told me he was no longer in the Tournament. It wasn’t true. I also wondered what his choice of friends said about his character.
I turned and hurried out of the house as fast as I could. I was able to make it outside and take a few needed breaths of fresh air before Aaron caught up to me. He grabbed my elbow and pulled me close. I didn’t resist but I also knew it was the last time he would ever touch me.
“Please let me explain,” he pleaded.
“There’s nothing to explain,” I said coldly. “Do you know what your friend, and I use the term loosely, said to me? He said horrible, disgusting and degrading things, Aaron. If he knew that you cared about me, if he knew I was someone special to you, why did he say those things? I think it’s because he didn’t know. You never bothered to tell him.”
Aaron’s eyes were now getting wet. “I’m sorry,” he muttered. But it was too little too late.
“And that’s not even the worst part. You lied to me. You looked into my eyes and lied. You told me you were out of the Tournament and you’re not. I can’t be with someone who lies. End of story.”
“I was going to get out of the Tournament. I swear. I just needed time.”
“You told me you were already done with it. All your friends think I’m nothing but a score on your card. Is that what you want your friends to think of me? That I’m someone they can sleep with and discard? Is that how you treat someone you care about, Aaron? You told me that you would never do that to me. I guess that was a lie, too. I wanted to be with you. I wanted a relationship with you. I guess we wanted two completely different things.”
“It’s not like that.” He looked lost. Empty. Hollow. It was a look I had only seen once before. It was the look my dad had in his eyes the day we buried my mom.
“Goodbye, Aaron.” I said as I turned and walked away. This time, he didn’t stop me.
By the time I got to my room, I was emotionally drained. I had cried most of the way but I still felt like I had a few more rounds of tears left in me. I plopped myself on my bed and stared at the ceiling. It was my own fault. I trusted someone I knew had a reputation of being a womanizer and I thought he was going to change for me. What a fairy tale! At least I didn’t sleep with him. My first time would be with someone, who actually deserved it. I thought about what it would be like to be with Lucas. He would never break my heart the way Aaron did but he couldn’t capture my heart the way Aaron did, either.
It wasn’t long before Olivia burst into the room with Marney. They were still on a post-speech tournament high. As soon as they saw me, they both went wide-eyed.
“You look like shit,” Marney observed.
“What did the asshole do this time?” Olivia sighed.
Between more sobs, I told them both the latest Aaron saga.
“You know there are other guys on campus besides Aaron,” Olivia suggested. “You are aware of that?”
“And other girls,” Marney added and winked at me.
I grabbed a tissue and blew my nose.
“If you keep dating the asshole, we’re going to have to start going to Costco for the huge mountain of tissue boxes,” Olivia joked.
At least that got me to smile.
“This is really fucked up? You know that, don’t you?” Olivia complained.
Before I could respond, there was a knock at the door. The three of us looked at each other. “Is Lucas coming over?” I asked.
Olivia shook her head. “He had a meeting over at The Geek Patrol.”
The knock grew into a pounding.
“I bet it’s Prince Charming.” Olivia sighed.
I felt too weak to move. “Would you get it?”
Olivia nodded. “It would be my pleasure.”
She went to the door with Marney on her heels. I dragged myself up and followed. Olivia slowly opened the door. I gasped when I saw Aaron. He was completely disheveled. His eyes were all red and puffy, like he had been crying as much as I had. His button-down shirt was half untucked and his hair was a complete mess. I could smell alcohol on him. I had never seen him consume that much around me.
“I need to see Sunshine.” He was slurring his words a bit.
Olivia looked puzzled. She didn’t know about his nickname for me.
Aaron blinked a few times then stared at Marney. “Who’s that guy?”
Olivia pointed a finger in Aaron’s face. “That is my girlfriend.”
Aaron’s head titled a bit as he continued to stare at Marney. “That guy is a girl?”
“I think you need to leave,” Olivia said sternly.
He shook his head. “I’m not leaving until I see Sunshine.” He crossed his arms over his chest as defiantly as he could in his drunken state.
“You do realize it’s the middle of the night,” Olivia said. “The sun won’t rise for a while. Maybe you’d better go home and sleep.”
Aaron shook his head again. “No, I won’t go. I won’t ever go. I need a mulligan.”
“Do we look like we’ve got beer in here? Besides, you don’t look like you need anymore.”
Marney chuckled. “A mulligan is like a do-over in golf.”
Aaron went wide-eyed. “Do you golf?” he asked Marney.
Marney gave a hearty laugh. “Do I look like I golf? My brother is on the school’s golf team. He’s been golfing since he was a kid.”
It looked like Aaron was trying to process this information then he said, “I need Rainy to let me have a mulligan.”
Olivia glanced over at me and shrugged. I shrugged back. I didn’t know what to do either.
I stepped closer to the door so Aaron could see me. His face brightened when he laid eyes on me. “There you are, Sunshine.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “What do you want, Aaron?”
“There are three things I need to say to you. Will you come out here so I can say them?”
“If I come out there and listen to you, will you then go home and get some sleep?”
Aaron nodded.
“Fine,” I said as I stepped out the door.
Olivia and Marney closed the door to give us some privacy.
When I glanced up at Aaron, he looked so sad and vulnerable and the pain in his eyes was so evident, I could feel it to my core.
“I know I fucked up. And I don’t know if you’ll ever forgive me or if I even deserve it. But there are three things I need to say to you.”
The seriousness of the moment seemed to sober him up considerably. He continued, “First, I want you to know that I love you. I’ve wanted to tell you that for a while but I wanted to wait for the most special and perfect time. Since I may never get another chance to tell you, I just wanted you to know.”
I could feel the tears welling in my eyes but I tried my best to hold them back. I didn’t want Aaron to see me cry.
“Second, I want you to know that you’re an incredible person. You’re beautiful, passionate, intelligent, strong, even courageous, and tenacious. I know you will do great things and leave your mark on the world. And I know I don’t even come close to deserving someone like you.”
Before I could stop it, a lone tear escaped and rolled down my cheek. Aaron smoothed it away with his thumb and then left his hand on the side of my cheek.
“Third,” Aaron said softly. “Even though I don’t deserve it, I hope you’ll consider giving me another chance to prove I can be everything you deserve in a man.”
Then Aaron leaned down and gave me a soft kiss. My heart skipped a few beats. Aaron stared into my eyes. “I love you, Rainy. And I always will.”
Then he turned and walked away.
***
I spent Thanksgiving Break with my dad. He wasn’t quite up to making a turkey, and I wasn’t sure he even knew how. My mom had always been the one to cook the big holiday meals. We decided to just get Chinese take-out and watch movies.
We tried to watch a comedy but neither one of us laughed. I was thinking about how Aaron and I had left things: completely in the air. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do or even what I wanted to do.
My dad stopped the movie and gave me a serious look. “What’s going on with you and Aaron?”
I shrugged. I didn’t have any idea where to begin. “Things are complicated.”
My dad put his hand on my shoulder. “Things were very complicated when your mom and I first met. We never told you this but I was engaged to someone else when I met your mother.”
My dad’s words shocked me. I wasn’t sure I had even heard him correctly. “You were engaged to someone else?”
My dad nodded. “It’s not something I’m very proud of. Sherrie, the woman I was engaged to, was a wonderful person. Pretty, smart, funny, everything a guy could want. We were together for almost a year. I loved her but I wasn’t in love with her. I didn’t know the difference until I met your mom.”
I was still in shock. My dad was such an honest and upstanding person. How did something like what he was describing happen to him?
“I made a huge mistake when I met your mom. I was so overcome with intense feelings for her, I neglected to mention I was engaged to someone else. I didn’t want her to see me as unavailable even though I was. I know it’s a cliché but with your mom, it was love at first sight. I had such overwhelming feelings for her, feelings I never had for Sherrie. I knew immediately that marrying Sherrie would be a mistake.
Unfortunately, I didn’t handle things as well as I could have and in retrospect I deeply regret it. Not that it was an excuse but I was only twenty as the time. I lacked the maturity to handle the situation. I started seeing your mom before I completely ended things with Sherrie. Of course, they both found out and I lost both of them. And I deserved every bit of heartbreak I got.”
I was confused. He said he lost both of them. “How did you get back together with mom?”
“It took a lot of hard work. I had to convince your mom that she could trust me, even if I didn’t deserve it. I had to convince her that we belonged together and that she was the love of my life. It wasn’t easy. But eventually, she let me back into her life and into her heart. I never did another thing to hurt your mom and I spent her entire life trying to make her happy.”
“You succeeded, Dad. I know you made mom happy and that she loved you with all of her heart.”
My dad nodded as he choked back a sob. He took a deep breath then said, “I think you should give Aaron a chance to at least prove he’s worthy of your love.”
I nodded. I guess if my mom was willing to give my dad a chance, I could give Aaron a chance, too.
***
I didn’t hear anything from Aaron while I was on break and I didn’t hear from him when classes started again, either. I was nervous about seeing him in class on Thursday and was shocked when he never made it. He had never missed class before and it was only two weeks until our final presentations were due. With all of the personal drama going on between us, we hadn’t had much time to finalize our projects.
When I exited the building after class, I was surprised to see Aaron standing outside presumably waiting for me. As I passed by him, he started walking with me.
“Why weren’t you in class today?” I asked.
“I told Dr. Griffin that I needed some extra time to finish something I was working on and she excused me from class.”
I eyed him suspiciously. “What were you working on?”
He gave me a half smile. “It’s a surprise.”
“Okay,” I said with some trepidation.
“I’d like to show you, if you have time.”
“This was supposed to be our study time.”
He grabbed my hand. “Come on. Follow me.”
When we arrived outside The Clubhouse I stopped in my tracks. “I’m not going in there.”
Aaron took both of my hands in his. “I know the last time you were here, it was awful. I promise I will never let anything like that even happen again. I won’t let you out of my sight. I withdrew from the Tournament and I told the guys the reason why, because I’m in love with you. They’re not very happy with me and they don’t understand but it doesn’t matter. Getting you back means more to me than they do. If I could move out, I would but I’m still the club President and I’m required to live here.”
I considered everything Aaron had said but I still felt extremely uncomfortable with the idea of going in there. What if I came face to face with Evan again?
“What I want to show you has to do with our final presentation. I know how important it is to you, so I did some extra work on my own.”
“Okay. But only because it has to do with our project, which I’m extremely nervous about since we haven’t had much of a chance to work on it lately.”
“You don’t have to worry about it. Trust me.”
That really was the crux of our problem, wasn’t it?
The Clubhouse was quiet. I assumed that was because it was still early and most of the guys were still in class or at the library studying. Aaron led me down a narrow hallway past several doors, which I assumed were other guy’s rooms. We stopped at a door at the end of the hallway.
“This is it. My college home.”
Aaron took a key from his pocket and unlocked the door. “Put your hands over your eyes,” he said. “And don’t peek.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Please play along,” he pleaded.
I obliged and placed my hands over my eyes. He opened the door and led me into the room. His room smelled of fresh laundry. It surprised me. He placed his hands on my shoulders and positioned me. “Okay, you can open your eyes.”
I blinked a few times to make sure my eyes were actually working. I could feel my jaw drop. “Oh, my God,” was all I could manage to say.
In front of me was a doll house-sized Mary Cassatt Museum. It was two stories high and had six rooms. Each room had two miniature Cassatt paintings and tiny people viewing the paintings. Each room also had benches and a few chairs and some small people were seated on them. The most impressive thing was that the miniature museum was fully lighted. Each painting was illuminated by a small pin light and every room had a working miniature chandelier.
“How did you do this?” I managed to say still in shock.
“I asked a dollhouse maker to help me design and build it. He’s been working on it with me for weeks. I hired an artist to paint the miniature replicas of Cassatt’s work. He could only do one or two a week, so there are only 12 paintings. But I think he did some of her best ones.”
I examined the miniature paintings more closely. “This is amazing. I can’t believe you spent so much time and energy on this.”
Aaron looked into my eyes. “I did it for you, Sunshine. Because I know how much the project means to you and I know how important the class is.”
I gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Thank you, Aaron.”
“Just seeing the smile on your face and the excitement in your eyes was worth it.” He stroked the side of my face with his thumb. He looked at me with such tenderness it melted my heart. “I’d better get you back to the dorm. The guys are going to star
t coming home for dinner soon and I don’t want them to make you feel uncomfortable.”
I nodded and Aaron led me out of his room. As he was locking his door, I could see Evan walking down the hallway toward us. I immediately froze.
“What’s up, Evan,” Aaron asked, the tone of his voice strained.
Aaron put his arm around me and pulled me close to him in a protective gesture, all the while glaring at Evan.
“I just wanted to apologize to your girlfriend,” Evan sneered, his voice dripping with insincerity. “I may have said a few things that were out of line.”
May have said? A few things? What a jerk. He had said several things that were definitely out of line. Not much of an apology, in my opinion. But he did call me Aaron’s girlfriend, even though at this point, I really wasn’t. Was I?
Evan continued. “Anyway, I hope to see you at our end-of-the-semester bash. I’m the head of the social committee, so I know it’ll be a good time.”
I didn’t know how to respond to Evan or if I was even supposed to. Aaron saved me. “I’ve got to get Rainy back to the dorm,” he said as he pulled me down the hallway away from Evan.
I could hear Evan’s voice echo down the hallway after us. “Catch you later, then, Bro.”
When we exited the social club, I eased myself from Aaron’s protective grasp.
“I noticed that Evan called me your girlfriend,” I said as I looked into Aaron’s eyes.
He held out his hand for me to take. “Well, are you?” he asked.
We both stared at his outstretched hand for a moment. It was a moment of truth. I knew if I took his hand, it would mean I was going to give him another chance and I was ready to let him back into my life. As soon as I reached for Aaron’s hand, he grabbed mine and quickly laced our fingers together. His grasp was tight as if he was afraid I might change my mind. When I looked up at Aaron, his face was glowing with joy.
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