by Ryan Casey
She’d fired.
What did that make her?
“Come on,” he said, edging her away. “You’ve done good here. It can’t be easy making the decision you made. Others have failed where you’ve succeeded.”
Then she felt two hands on either shoulder.
“But you aren’t done yet,” Matthew said.
She felt the cuffs around her wrists.
And then she felt the blindfold over her head once more.
Darkness surrounded her.
But in the darkness, all she could see was Harvey’s begging face, right before her.
And all she could feel was that trigger digging into her finger.
And the weight of that silent bullet.
Chapter Thirty
Susan tried to close her eyes and get some rest like the others told her to, but there was no sleeping for her.
She’d grown kind of used to it, in all truth. So many sleepless nights. And the nights she had slept, that feeling of dread at the pit of her stomach whenever she woke up.
It was a vicious cycle.
A cycle that she’d escaped.
Or at least that’s what she told herself.
She looked around at the rest of the group. All of them looked like they were sleeping now, except for Jack. He was looking right at her. Keeping an eye on her at all times.
She understood if he didn’t trust her. She was dressed like the enemy. She looked like the enemy. She knew all about the enemy.
But at the same time… she’d saved him.
Rescued him from the middle of that campsite.
That had to count for something in his eyes, right?
But at the same time, even Susan wasn’t sure what to believe. She wasn’t sure what to trust.
Because she still feared Matthew.
And she especially feared the fact they were talking about heading right towards his group.
At first, she thought she had an opportunity. A chance to get away and truly start again.
But she should’ve known Jack’s group had things they needed to resolve.
First, there was the question of Emma, the missing girl.
They weren’t just going to give up on her, as much as Susan tried to warn them they were making a bad decision by going anywhere near Matthew’s group.
And then the rest of their people, too. Jack seemed galvanised after what’d happened. He should’ve learned his lesson, but it didn’t seem like he had.
She’d tried warning him, but it just wasn’t getting through.
He was so desperate to lead his people to some kind of victory that he was risking even more tragedy.
She looked away from him, back into the darkness beyond the trees. Jack said they were getting a couple of hours rest before beginning their attack.
And Susan was going to be a big part of it.
She thought about what they’d discussed. Her role in their rescue of Emma. She was going to reintroduce herself to Matthew. She was going to be the one who got inside and freed Emma before Jack’s people wiped them out when they least expected it.
Susan told him what she thought the problems were. She told him it was risky. And she told him how dangerous Matthew was, and how little she wanted to go back to him.
But Jack had promised he was going to make sure she was okay. They were going to make sure nothing happened to her, or anyone else.
She wished he knew just how futile a promise he was making.
She closed her eyes and thought of Tommy. Things had been so good when he was alive. So much better. She had been responsible. She had felt stronger and more capable.
But all that had been stolen from her. All of her strength had slipped away.
She thought back to what she’d told Jack and his group and she felt guilty. They seemed good people. They were good people.
But she hadn’t been entirely truthful with him.
She thought back to that time with Matthew and his people. She thought about the truths she’d shared with Jack. Being trapped in that room. Being forced to listen to people die.
Then being too afraid to even try and escape when they offered to let her go.
She thought about the next thing they’d done. The way they’d dragged her into the woods. Handed her a gun and told her to take that man before her out.
And she hadn’t wanted to. She wanted to resist, so much.
But she was afraid.
She was so afraid.
And she was so alone.
So she’d pulled that trigger.
The gun hadn’t been loaded. It was a loyalty test. A way of proving just how strong she actually was.
It wasn’t the end of the initiations.
It was only the beginning.
A slow, methodical breaking down of reason. Forcing reliance on the very person you despised in order to get what you wanted in life.
All of it building up to the final test.
The field test.
She thought about the last time she’d seen Matthew. What he told her. To go out there and reach out to another group. A group who seemed strong.
She’d seen the group. And she felt bad about it. She’d gone back to Matthew. Reported her findings.
And then he’d given her what he said was the final part of her initiation.
To befriend them.
To make it seem like she was a victim to them.
And then to bring the strongest—the very strongest—right to him, especially for the Festival.
She looked over at Jack again. Felt that bitterness, those mixed feelings. Because she told herself as soon as she got away from Matthew the last time that she wasn’t going to go back. She wasn’t going to be drawn into his awful world.
But now she wasn’t sure.
Because this wasn’t her final test.
This wasn’t her initiation.
She had passed her test already.
This was her role now.
This was her job.
This was her duty.
She saw herself being drawn back towards Matthew, just like she’d been tasked. All of it was going perfectly. All of it was going just to plan.
But she wasn’t sure what she was going to do when she got to Matthew’s camp.
Take Jack’s side and make a break for freedom, once and for all?
Or finish her duty?
She shook her head. She wasn’t sure how she’d got to this point, so morally bankrupt.
But then again, she was a survivor. That’s what Doctor Khalil had told her, what seemed like a lifetime ago. That’s what she knew she was.
She was a survivor.
And she was far, far stronger than she came across.
She made her own decisions.
And she did whatever she could to survive.
She was her own leader.
So that’s exactly what she had to do.
Lead.
She looked at Jack, once more.
At the one she knew was the strongest.
And then she closed her eyes.
She would finish her duty.
She just wasn’t sure which duty yet.
Chapter Thirty-One
Jack looked at the sun shining through the treetops and he knew it was time to get moving.
They’d slept in longer than intended. Everyone was still around, which was reassuring. He was worried about what might happen in the night. Matthew’s group could be close by. They could ambush at any time.
Jack didn’t like to imagine how he’d feel if he woke up to find everyone dead around him.
He just knew he couldn’t take any more loss.
Hazel, Candice, and Bella walked together with Mrs Fuzzles. Jack found himself leading the group with Susan. She wasn’t talkative. There was so much he didn’t know about her. She’d told her how she ended up where she was. Her story was tragic, that went without saying.
But sometimes Jack looked at her and saw her staring into space. Like she was somewhere
else entirely.
“How far?” Jack asked.
Susan didn’t respond.
“Hey. Susan. How far?”
She looked around at him then, abruptly, like she’d been made to jump. “What?”
“How far until we reach Matthew’s camp?”
She nodded, then. “Hours.”
“How many hours?”
“We’ll be there today.”
“And you’re okay? With what we’ve got planned?”
Susan looked away. He could tell she was worried. Sending her back to Matthew was dangerous. It didn’t sit too well with Jack.
But at the end of the day, they were outnumbered and they were outgunned.
Susan was the only one who might be able to get herself close enough to Emma to get her out of there, so that had to be the first part of the plan.
Matthew trusted her enough to let her get close again. Hopefully.
It didn’t help that Susan was still being so vague about everything.
Regardless, there were no certainties in any of this.
It was all a game of ultra-fine margins.
If Jack or any of the others showed themselves, they would be shot on sight.
Destroying Matthew’s group was a dream. It felt like justice.
But as things stood, Jack knew his people didn’t have the means to exact that justice. They had to work with what they had.
“I’m afraid,” Susan said.
That didn’t make Jack fell any less guilty. “We’ll be watching your back.”
“You don’t understand. I… I want to do this. I want to help. But…”
She glanced at Jack, then. It was like she was trying to tell him something. Trying to speak to him without words.
Like she was desperate for him to read the signs she was putting before him.
But then Jack heard rustling to his right and he went still.
Susan looked around, too. Her eyes widened right away. She crouched down, instinctively.
Villain growled.
Hazel, Bella, and Candice kept on walking on. “What’s got you—”
“Quiet,” Jack said.
They stopped. All of them frowned.
And then Jack heard the rustling again, and he saw the look of realisation on their faces.
All of them were quiet.
All of them were still.
He heard the rustling around them, right to left. He clutched his knife tightly. The birds around him had stopped singing. He felt like he was being watched; like there were eyes on him everywhere.
He turned around, looked at the trees. Tried to see the source of the movement.
And then he noticed the rustling had stopped.
He waited. Totally still. Heart racing. He didn’t want to move. He didn’t want to risk compromising their position.
But the longer he waited, the more he realised there were no sounds anymore.
“Come on,” he said. “We’ve got to…”
Then, he heard something that made his stomach sink.
A growl.
He looked at the trees in front of him. The hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. He’d heard rumours about animals escaping zoos. It stood to reason, after all. When the power went out, a lot of them would’ve been forced to escape. Sympathetic zookeepers might even have let them out themselves.
He heard this growling and these footsteps and he dreaded what he might come up against. A lion. A tiger. A bear. Every option scarier than the last. Every single one a reminder that humanity wasn’t even the apex predator anymore. There were far more dangerous creatures out there than them.
He lowered and faced the movement in the woods. Held his knife. Waited, sweat trickling down his forehead.
And then he saw it.
Out of the trees, a wolf emerged.
Its teeth were showing. Its eyes were wide and hungry. It looked fierce.
But the closer it edged, the more Jack realised something.
It wasn’t a normal wolf, for one.
It had a blue collar around its neck.
“A husky,” Jack said.
He saw it get closer and saw how matted its fur was, and saw its bright blue eyes. There were bite marks on its rear. There was a scar right across its right eye.
It was thin. Clearly malnourished.
Jack watched it get closer and he knew he had to do whatever he had to do. It felt harsh, but this was a harsh world. If this dog attacked, he had to defend himself. He had to defend his people.
But at the same time… maybe there was another way.
He crouched down. Lowered the knife, just a little. Held out his other hand.
“Jack?” Candice said. “What’re you doing?”
He ignored her. Kept that hand outstretched.
The husky stared at it, uncertain, backing away a little, snarling even more.
“Jack,” Hazel said.
He glanced around at her and he saw her shaking her head. He knew what she was saying. This was a stretch too far. He wasn’t going to tame this animal. He had to act, as harsh as it was. He had to act fast.
But he looked away. Because he had to trust himself. He had to believe himself.
And this represented all that.
He had to start stepping up.
He had to start doing what he thought was right.
He had to own his decisions. However wrong they may be.
He held out his hand a little further. “Come on. It’s okay. Come here.”
The husky backed away again. Growled louder.
Villain just stood there looking uncertain.
The husky barked, then. Its teeth were fully on show. Its eyes were bloodshot and red. It looked primed to attack.
Jack went to lift his knife. To do what he had to do, if he had to do it.
And then something remarkable happened.
The husky stepped forward and sniffed his hand.
He held his hand there. Stayed still. Every little movement of his fingers made the husky back off a little.
But it kept on returning to him.
Kept on sniffing his hand.
He saw the collar around the dog’s neck, then. The name, “Nymeria,” no doubt after Game of Thrones.
“It’s okay, Nymeria,” he said. “Good girl. Good girl.”
She looked up at him and then she licked at his hand, just the once.
And at that moment, Jack felt warmth inside.
He stood up. Clicked his fingers. Watched as Nymeria stepped closer, up to Villain, the next true test of just how much this dog could be tamed.
Villain stood there. Growled.
Nymeria stared right into his eyes.
The standoff intensified.
Jack worried it wasn’t going to work. He didn’t know how long this dog had been out here. And dogs were unpredictable beasts with one another at the best of times.
And then out of nowhere, Villain went quiet and dropped to his belly, submitting.
Jack smiled. Hazel laughed. Everyone stared at this scene before them with disbelief.
Even Mrs Fuzzles looked puzzled, like this dance of egos was all beneath her.
Jack looked up at Susan then and saw her smiling.
He swore he saw a tear in her eye.
“You okay?” he asked.
She wiped her eyes.
Looked away.
And then she nodded.
“Come on,” she said. “We’re close.”
They set off walking again, their new friend in tow, always by Villain’s side.
Storm clouds thickened overhead.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Emma sat in that dark tent once more and thought about what happened in the woods.
It was always dark in here. It didn’t matter if it was daylight or not, not with the blindfold covering her vision.
She was hungry. Thirsty. She felt like she hadn’t eaten or drank properly for days, even though she wasn’t sure how long she had been here at all.
She wanted to shout for help. She wanted to beg for water. She wanted to cry out for all this to be over.
But she couldn’t. Because she had to stay strong.
She had to stay strong because she had to do whatever it took to get to Matthew.
But then she kept on thinking about what happened in the woods and she wondered where that left her.
She thought about Harvey, and whether he was even still alive at all. He’d crouched there on his knees, tape around his mouth, his face beaten and dripping sweat. She’d held that pistol, pointed it at him, and she’d seen the sheer terror in his eyes.
And even if the gun hadn’t been loaded, that didn’t matter, because Emma had pulled the trigger.
She’d done it because she thought it might make her look stronger. More trustworthy to Matthew.
But was that really how far she was willing to go?
And did that make her much different to Matthew, really?
She shook her head. Took in a sharp breath.
What she’d done was terrible. It made her want to scrub her hands clean, just like when she’d fired that shot at Logan in the woods.
But it was her only choice.
If she gave up or if she showed weakness, Matthew wouldn’t maintain much patience in her.
One slip and it could all be over.
One sign of hesitation and she was finished.
She couldn’t stop fighting.
She couldn’t give up.
She didn’t even know if there was anyone out there coming for her at all.
She had to take life into her own hands.
She had to do what was right for her.
Even if it felt so wrong.
Because this was about more than just her own survival.
This was about making Matthew pay for what he’d done to her home.
It was about making him pay for the kind of human being he was.
“There was another like you, once.”
The voice came out of nowhere. Made her jump. She soon steadied herself, though. Brought her breathing under control. She didn’t say a thing. Didn’t want to show any sign of curiosity. Didn’t want to show any sign of anything.
“Similar age. She did just as well as you,” Matthew said. It was clearly him. “Pulled the trigger. Sat in this tent for two whole days without food and water. So strong. I thought I could believe in her. I thought I could trust her. And then I let her out and the first thing she did was try to kill me for some bullshit about what I supposedly did to her people.”