“But, I—”
“Too late now, you can’t take it back.” He waves a hand. “Besides,” he sits tall and straightens his jacket, “I can’t wait to tag along.”
“But it’s really not necessary.” My heart pounds.
“Of course, it’s not. But I insist.” He grins. “You said yourself, two heads are better than one. Imagine what three can do?” He chuckles. “Oh, don’t look so glum.” He floats a hand in my direction. “Just think how fast we’ll be able to crack the case, free your uncle from jail, and get you back here where you belong, decorating my lovely abode.” He raises his teacup to me.
“But—”
“Yes, yes, this is a fine idea.” He sits back in his chair, mock sipping his tea, looking very full of himself. “The finest idea I’ve had in a while.” He winks.
Oh, gods…
Chapter 27
“This way,” Jamie says, leading our trio deeper into the wooded area just outside the back of the fairgrounds. Well, there’s really only two of us, and Sotherby, which, of course, only I can see trailing behind.
It’s late and getting dark, and we really should be getting home now, but Jamie’s convinced we’re going to find something if we just press on. Silly me, I mentioned the gloves earlier, and now he’s on a quest. The man is like a dog with a bone when it comes to finding clues.
“You’re sure we need to be out here at this hour? I mean, we could always come back tomorrow,” I say, ducking for a branch and tripping on a root. That’s about the fifteenth time in about the last five minutes. If I’d have known were going into the woods, I wouldn’t have worn heels. Well, half heels. I look down at my mud-caked shoes. So much for these.
I kick, flicking the mud off.
“Near as I can figure, she would have had to come through these woods to get to the main road.” Jamie lifts his head and peers around again.
Or simply used magical powers to zap herself away.
“Exactly,” Sotherby says, reading my mind.
“You be quiet back there,” I turn and hiss at him. Sotherby jerks backward, motioning the ticky-lock thing over his lips. “And stop reading my mind,” I whisper.
“There’s no other possible escape route, ” Jamie continues, pressing on through the woods, oblivious to our annoying tag along. “She would have had to come this way.”
“Or she could have doubled back and switched direction altogether, under the veil of the explosion,” Sotherby whispers.
“Stop it,” I snap at him.
“If we could only find footprints, we might be able to figure out where she went,” Jamie says, battling his way through a section of particularly thick and rugged brush.
It’s been a couple of days, and it’s rained since, and well… I honestly can’t imagine someone running off through here and making it all the way to the road, especially in the dark, the underbrush is just too thick. I squeeze through some particularly nasty brambles.
“Hmmm… not, so brilliant now, is he?” Sotherby reads my mind.
“I told you to stop doing that.”
“What?” Jamie turns.
“Nothing.” I blush, swinging my hands behind my back, clutching them.
He turns and continues on our way.
“Hush up, you!” I hiss back at Sotherby.
“What was that?”
“Oh, I aaaah…just said, Hush-a-boo.” I throw out my arms, playful, and sing the words. Jamie looks at me strangely. “It’s something we say in my family when we’ve lost something, and we want it returned.” I bite my lip. “You know, it’s like a superstitious ritual.” I shrug. “Just thought it might work.”
Sotherby sniggers behind me.
“Ooooh,” Jamie says, dragging out the vowel, his head bobbing backward along with it. “Okay, then, Hush-a-boo, it is.” He turns and shouts the word into the trees, and I’m embarrassed for him.
Sotherby breaks into full-on laughter at my back. “Oh, but you we’re wrong about this one. He does have a bit of dolt in him.”
I turn around and scowl at him hard, tripping over another root and turning my ankle in the process. “Oh, ow! Jeez. Crap!” I hop, falling forward.
“Whoops, careful there.” Jamie catches me as I stumble forward, falling against the warm rock-hard wall of his chest, into his arms. His heart races beneath my fingertips. As does mine all of a sudden. He smiles and looks down at me with those spectacular azure eyes of his that sparkle in the slivers of moonlight cutting through the canopy of trees above our heads. “Well, hello there,” he whispers in a deep and alluring voice.
“Hello there,” I whisper back.
“Oh, Gatsby,” Sotherby groans and slaps his forehead.
“What happened?” Jamie asks.
“A root,” I say.
“Darned things.” He pulls me closer and supports my weight, allowing me to lean against his chest. So close in fact, our hearts beat together, and our breaths mingle. If I’m not careful, I could add fainting to the problem.
“You all right?” he asks.
“I’m not sure,” I answer breathlessly. I put my foot down and try to put weight on it and grimace.
“Oh, well, that’s clearly not happening,” he says, looping my arm around his neck.
“What are you doing?” I hop in place, my heart thundering hard against his.
“Well, I’m going to carry you out, of course.” He smiles, lifting me slightly. “Can’t go risking further injury to one of my best detectives now, can I?”
“But we haven’t finished, yet,” I protest, looking around his massive shoulders at the forest.
“Oh, we have now,” he says, about to hoist me up into his arms, then stops. “You’re sure you only twisted it?” He looks down at my leg. “Before I move you, perhaps we should check for a break.”
“Oh gah!” Sotherby gaffs, then swirls round in front of me and stares into my face. “You’re not honestly going to fall for that line, are you, damsel?” He looks through Jamie’s head.
I ignore him and keep my gaze trained on Jamie. “You can check it if you’d like. It is probably a good idea,” I say.
“Oh for ghoulsakes!” Sotherby blusters, thrusting himself up into the trees and turning his back. “I refuse to watch this nonsense.”
“Great, don’t,” I say to him.
“Don’t what?” Jamie looks up.
“Don’t forget to check both my ankles. To see if one is more swollen than the other,” I say, smiling sweetly.
“You know this really is getting nauseating,” Sotherby groans.
“I thought you weren’t watching,” I hiss-whisper up to him, as Jamie sets me down gently on a tree stump and begins softly caressing my ankle—checking for a break.
“Does this hurt?” he asks, looking up at me.
“No.”
“And this—”
“How could it possibly hurt. You’re fondling her not checking for breaks?” Sotherby spits, swooping down from the trees, placing himself between us. “He’s just a cad, you know. A brute. A ne’er-do-well. A player.”
“Ne’er-do-well? Really?”
“Huh?”
“Nothing.” I smile at down Jamie.
“What would you call a man who freely fondles a woman’s ankles before they’re even been properly introduced!” Sotherby snarls.
“Progress,” I say.
“What?” Jamie looks up, cutting through Sotherby’s head.
“I said, you’re making progress. It really doesn’t hurt at all anymore.” I smile.
“Oh, isn’t that miraculous!” Sotherby guffaws and spins away.
“And this?” Jamie moves his hand up my leg. “Does this hurt?”
Sotherby’s eyes spring wide. “Land sakes, the man is worse than I thought!”
“No,” I say to Jamie. “The tibia’s fine too. Honestly”—I lean down to him—“I don’t think anything is broken.”
“Likely just a sprain then. I’d better get you out of here.”
He looks up and our lips nearly brush, our faces hovering so close together.
“Oh, that’s it. Why don’t you kiss her now? That should make it better.” Sotherby snorts, balling his fists on his hips.
“If this is bothering you so much, perhaps you should go!”
“You’re right, we should go,” Jamie says, only half hearing what I’ve said, and pulls back from me.
“Oh, no… I didn’t mean—”
“You’re right. It’s getting too dark to be out here anyway. Don’t want to get lost out here. I’ll come back in daylight tomorrow. Or you can join me in a couple of days, once your ankle is healed.” He helps me back to a wobbly stand, then slings me up into his arms.
“Oh, I really don’t think that’s necessary.”
“Sure, it is. You can’t possibly walk out through this. Besides, it’s fine.” He adjusts me in his arms. “I don’t mind.” He smiles at me and trips on a root, and we nearly topple.
“Oh goodwitchsakes!” Sotherby groans.
“Oh, lover girl!” I hear a voice and realize it’s Reggie. “I’ve got news on your betrothed.” He drops in at a brisk trot beside us.
It’s not bad enough I had to deal with a nosy ghost trailing me on this investigation, now I’ve got to contend with an overzealous familiar.
“What do you want?” I whisper to him as quietly as I can.
“Wow, nothing like feeling loved after I’ve been gone a week.”
“Just get to it, will you please, Reggie?” I don’t have time for his battered ego right now. Thank goodness he’s kept himself invisible and has switched to talking to me telepathically.
At least someone knows how to keep himself a secret around here.
I glare back at Sotherby, still standing gape-mouthed, watching us go.
“Let’s just say, you’ve got yourself wrapped up in quite the pickle,” Reggie says.
“What do you mean?” I grimace. “This is no time for metaphors, Reggie. Give it to me straight.”
“All right then.” He turns up his snout. “Here it is without the sugar coating. It appears you’ve gone and bonded yourself for life to a real roguish scoundrel. And not like the one who’s carrying you. Worse,” he quickly adds, grinning. “I really have to agree with Sotherby on that point.” He glances back at him and waves.
“I have not bonded myself to anyone.” I glare down on him. “Not on purpose, anyway.”
“Well, whatever you’ve done. The man, creature, is less than reputable.” He shrugs.
“In what way?”
“By all accounts the man is a bum, from what I can find. A drifter, a flimflammer, a hoaxer, and imposter—”
“What, no ne’er-do-well?”
“I was getting to that.” He smiles. “But worse than that, he is listed as a bounty hunter.”
“Bounty hunter?” I gulp.
“Yes.” Reggie bats his long fox lashes. “Working for no jurisdiction in particular. With no fixed address, I’m afraid.” He provides me with the holographic proof of findings. “The man in question—or warlock, I should say—is, I’m afraid, completely and utterly covenless.”
I gulp.
Chapter 28
“You’re not going to get away with this, you know? I won’t let you! You flim-flamming little ne’er-do-well!” My nostrils flare as I shout into Jeremy’s sleeping face up at the hospital. “How dare you try to trick me into marrying you. I asked you outright, how many times if you were a warlock, and you denied it! Every time!” I spin around and start pacing, hobbling on my sore ankle. “Now, you need to come out of him, right this minute and face me like a man…or whatever you are.” I throw up my hands. “I can’t believe you would lie to me like that. Making me believe you’re one thing when you’re quite another. You are in there, aren’t you?” I bend, and glare. “And to think, I almost fell in love with you. A bounty hunter!” I stop and clutch my hips. “Well, those feelings end now, let me tell you. Not because you’re a bounty hunter, necessarily. Because you lied to me!” I growl in my throat. “And know this, whatever this… scheme of yours is”—I flail my arms—“I am not, and will not, ever be bonded to you. Do you hear me? Are you even in there?” I lean over shouting again in Jeremy’s face. “Oooo, you good-for-nothing rogue, you!” I suppress the urge to pinch his cheeks.
“I am warning you,” I shake a stern finger, “if you are in there and ignoring me, I’m not going to through with this. I mean it. You will wake up, and we will simply dissolve this stupid union. Like two mature adult…paranormal beings!” I throw up my scorched palm. “And don’t for a minute think we’re actually already bonded. Because we are not. Hex, I don’t even know your real name!”
Jeremy half smiles. “Is that you?” I scurry over to his bedside and lean over his face. “Or is that just gas?” I stare, blinking.
The door to his room presses gently open at my back, and I scramble for cover.
I head left, then right then, dive into the closet at the back of the room and hide, worried it might be Jamie, and I don’t want to have to explain why I was screaming at his poor comatose brother—who’s not really his brother. I grit my teeth.
I mean, what kind of animal does that?
I can’t see well because of the angle of the closet, but I sense someone in the room now. Someone not of this world.
The air grows instantly chilly.
“Oh, there you are. Wake up! Wake up, you silly dolt!” I hear someone shouting and peer through the keyhole to see Sotherby perched over Jeremy’s bed, hovering just inches from his face. “Wake up, I say, for goodnessakes, before it’s too late!”
Too late for what? I look out to see Sotherby clutching Jeremy by his pajama collar. “Wake up, wake up, you silly fool. Don’t you see what’s happening here? As you lollygag about in this bed, your brother’s about to win over your girl?”
He’s what?
“You cannot let that happen. We must not let that happen!” Sotherby grits his teeth and shouts in his face, his ghostly skin pinking. “I tell you I’ve seen that look in her eyes before. Predominately because of you. And although I wasn’t worried then, I certainly am now. Because, well…that was you, but this is him!” Sotherby’s eyes flash. “Now, come, wake up, you silly dolt. Wake up and fight for your girl!” He picks up an arm and shakes it. “I simply won’t let you lose her! Not on my watch!” He lets go, and Jeremy’s arm drops to the bed.
Jeremy murmurs something.
“What was that?” Sotherby lowers an ear to his mouth. Jeremy gurgles something completely inaudible. “That’s right. I’m telling you. She’s falling for him. And you know how he is. You must wake up and stop this now!”
“What was that?” I say, stepping from closet.
Sotherby’s eyes grow wide as tea saucers. “What was what?” He whirls around, hiding his hands behind his back, looking more guilty than he ever has. “What were you doing in that closest?” He tries to change the subject.
“That doesn’t matter. What matters is why you were just shouting at him like that?”
“Shouting?” Sotherby does his best to look offended. “You wound me, girl. I was doing no such thing.”
“Yes, you were. I heard you, Sotherby.” I sweep toward him, hovering next to the foot of the bed.
Sotherby guffaws and mock clutches his chest. “To think a man can’t drop by to extend concern for his broken-down pal—”
“Oh, stop it.” I swat at him. “Firstly, you’ve never been pals, and secondly, I heard what you were saying, calling him a dolt even as he lies there, completely unconscious. How could you?” I’d stamp my foot but it hurts.
“Yes, well, I heard you too.” Sotherby looks down his nose at me slyly. “Shouting about refusing to marry him.”
“You heard that?” I look at him, shocked.
“Yes.” He grins. “Now whose kettle is calling whose black?”
“I assure you what you heard is not what you think.” I shake my head and rub my hands on my skirt.<
br />
“Just as I assure you, what you overheard me saying was not born of ill-will.” He flicks up his chin and stares down at me. “In fact, I was here on a mission to save the man’s life.”
“Save his life, huh?” I raise a brow.
“In a matter of speaking, yes.”
“I heard what you said, you know?” I cross my arms and drum my fingernails on my forearm, while Sotherby looks nervous. “And you’re wrong.”
“Am I?”
“Yes,” I say firmly. “Jamie may be smart and good-looking and a great investigator, but I am in no way falling in love with him.” I’m not, right? I flip up my chin and look away, afraid he’ll be able to read it in my eyes. “We are simply business partners. That is all.”
“Oh, is that what you’re calling it?”
“Honestly, Sotherby.” I snap back around. “I swear, every man who looks at me, you think is interested.”
“And I swear, you don’t understand a thing about men!” he snaps back at me. “Every man who looks at you is interested, you silly thing! That’s what men are all about!”
“Oh, and does that include yourself?” I arch a brow.
His ghostly gray skin flushes whitish-gray. “Don’t be preposterous. We’ve been over this.”
“Just as we’ve been over several times that my love life is my own.”
“I am only trying to protect you.”
“From what?” I snap.
“I saw the way you were looking at Jamie out there in the forest, the same way you were looking at the dolt that night you went dancing together up at Hex Hall.”
“And you wouldn’t know any of this if you weren’t constantly meddling in my affairs.”
“Ah! So, I am right!” He points a sweeping finger toward the ceiling now, his eyes flashing.
“You know what, you really need to stay out of my head and my love life!” I lean forward, shouting. “I am done with you always tailing me around and eavesdropping on my thoughts. What I do is my business and not yours to meddle in. What do you think you are—one of my new relatives?” My voice ricochets around the room. Sotherby falls back from me, looking scorned.
Abracastabra (Hex Falls Paranormal Cozy Mystery # 4) (Hex Falls Paranormal Cozy Mystery Series) Page 16