Red Leaves

by Sita Brahmachari

  ‘Watch. Watch her fly!’ Elder whispered, as a ladybird began to stir to life and crawl across her wrinkled hand, finally breaking free of the sticky sap. It spread its wings and flew, landing on Aisha’s forehead.

  ‘Say the rhyme, speak the rhyme, follow me . . . Ladybird, ladybird, fly away home, your house is on fire, your children all roam.’

  Aisha repeated the words.

  ‘Close your eyes, make your wish and she will fly! Earthstars falling, death cap waiting, spirits calling, heat rising . . .’

  Elder’s voice faded into the distance and Aisha opened her eyes to find that her wish had been granted.

  ‘Abo! My abo!’ she called, and ran at her father, burying her head in his chest. She lay in his arms for the longest time as he sang her a birthday blessing. She was home.

  Elder called and called to Aisha, but she could not hear her, so the old woman reached into the tree trunk, grabbed Aisha’s hands and yanked her out with all her force.

  ‘Difficult birth, difficult birth . . .’ she whispered, rocking Aisha in her arms as if she was a baby. Then she raised Aisha’s head and pointed back through the tree. In the distance a man and a woman walked together through a heat haze. They turned to her and waved.

  ‘My hoyo and my abo, together now,’ Aisha whispered, reaching out to them and struggling to release herself from Elder’s grasp, but the old woman held her tight.

  ‘Let your mother and your father rest now. If you love them, let them go.’

  Aisha stopped fighting against Elder, raised her hands and waved until her hoyo and abo were no more than tiny dots in the vast landscape.

  ‘Hush now, Aisha, don’t you cry, Elder’s singing you a lullaby. Rest now, let the spirit rest.’

  Iona climbed up and over the shelter to the stream, where Red was whining. She called to her, but the dog continued sniffing the air as if deeply disturbed by something . . . or someone.

  ‘I don’t know what’s up with her. There’s no one there!’ Iona said as she returned to the others and the dying embers of the fire.

  Aisha shrank down inside her sleeping bag and wiped the tears from her eyes. She swallowed hard. She had never had a dream that felt so true. She had got her wish that her abo would appear to her on her birthday, but it was very far from how she had imagined their reunion. Somewhere deep in her gut she knew that she would never see him again and now she could hardly stand to open her eyes and face these strangers. But Red was pawing at her and forcing her to stir.

  ‘Someone’s been here all right,’ Zak said.

  Aisha opened her eyes to find Zak and Iona crouching on the other side of the fire unpacking bags full of food.

  ‘Treats from Elder!’ Iona laughed. ‘I thought I felt her around in the night. Maybe that’s why I dreamed about her.’

  Aisha shivered and her head felt tight with cold. She hugged herself and her eye was caught by a white paper flower pinned to her coat.

  ‘Who put this here?’ Aisha asked.

  Iona pointed to identical flowers on her own coat and Zak’s. ‘Seems like we’ve all been given one.’

  The thought of Elder stealing up on them, roaming amongst their dreams as they slept made Zak’s skin crawl.

  Iona smiled as she unpacked. ‘She’s so kind – it’s not just food. She’s brought a pan and a cup, spoons . . . all sorts. Even soap and a clean towel! She must have spent more than that tenner on us!’

  ‘What tenner? Probably used the money she stole from me, along with my other things!’ Zak grumbled. Now he felt sure that he’d placed his wallet in his rucksack with twenty pounds inside.

  Iona rummaged in the bag, took out a wallet and opened it.

  ‘Here.’ She pulled out a twenty-pound note and threw it at Zak. ‘Just because she’s on the street, doesn’t make her a thief.’

  ‘Why do you think she gave us these?’ Zak asked, inspecting the petals of the poppy. He’d felt like taking it off but something had stopped him. ‘White poppies are for peace, I think. There’s supposed to be a war memorial somewhere in this wood. I saw it on a map I found. But I just don’t get why Elder would bring back my wallet and keep all my other things.’

  Aisha bit her lip. ‘Are you sure you didn’t imagine the photo and the map after I told you about my dream? Finding that game was probably just some strange coincidence. Maybe I saw them before and didn’t realize it . . . and you did hurt your head.’

  ‘Believe what you want, but we dreamed about the same people.’ Zak sighed and turned away. ‘I didn’t make up their names written on the wall, did I? I’m going to see if I can find Elder and get my things back.’

  Aisha glanced towards the shelter. Iona had been inside snuggled up with Red for a while. Seeing how much Iona loved Red made Aisha feel guilty that she was the reason that the dog had strayed. It seemed right to leave them to enjoy their reunion in peace. Aisha turned back to Zak. ‘I’ll come with you, if you want.’

  As they walked through the wood they carried their dreams with them, like burdens on their backs. Zak didn’t blame Aisha for thinking that he was confused. She was right that he wasn’t sure of anything. But she seemed caught up in all of this too with her dream of the wartime family, and there must be a reason why Edwin had led him to the air-raid shelter. He couldn’t make any sense of it, but he couldn’t ignore what Edwin had told him either . . . It felt as if he would be tempting fate if he didn’t go looking for the memorial. Edwin’s words haunted him. Iona talked of fair deals. Well this felt like a deal he couldn’t afford to break – find the memorial to give Edwin’s mum peace and my mum will come home safe, he repeated to himself as he kicked his way free of an ivy vine.

  Aisha grabbed Zak’s arm and pulled him back to stop him crushing something on the ground ahead of him.

  Slung across arching branches of bracken were intricately woven spider’s webs, sparkling like spun sugar with heavy drops of dew.

  Aisha stopped and inspected them. ‘How can such a delicate web carry something as heavy as morning tears?’ she asked, pointing to a water droplet that threatened to dissolve the fine lace threads.

  ‘You mean dew?’ Zak asked, inspecting the webs more closely.

  ‘No, I mean tears!’ Aisha sighed. ‘Liliana told me this story after one of my nightmares. Probably to make me feel better. She says these webs are dream-catchers. The weavers stay up all night, spinning webs to catch your dreams in, and when the sun heats the earth they all disappear, taking the bad feeling from your dreams with them and leaving only the good ones to dance free. Nice story, isn’t it?’

  Zak tried not to stare at her as she spoke. He loved listening to Aisha tell her stories. Her English was almost perfect with just a hint of an accent, but when she spoke she made the words sound fresh and new. Perhaps she thought that Edwin and Albert were some kind of fable too.

  ‘You think all this stuff I’ve told you is made up?’

  Aisha shrugged.

  How can I get her to believe me? Zak remembered the questions that had run through his own mind when she’d told him her dream. ‘How old was the Eddie you dreamed about?’ he asked.

  ‘Maybe nine or ten,’ Aisha answered.

  ‘And Albert?

  ‘I don’t know, an old man.’

  ‘So it could be the same Albert as the man in my photo.’

  Aisha smiled kindly at him. ‘I haven’t seen a photo.’

  Zak felt suddenly foolish. It was as if she pitied him. Why had Elder kept his things? What value could they be to her? If he could show Aisha the photo and map and the name in the plasterwork, then maybe she would believe him.

  ‘Sometimes it’s easier to think of strangers than the people you’re really missing,’ Aisha said breathlessly, and rested for a moment on a tree stump.

  When he looked back at her, Zak was shocked to find that she was weeping. ‘I had a dream last night . . .’ She struggled to speak through her emotion. Zak took a step towards her, but she held up a hand as if to say, I don’t ne
ed you to comfort me. Taking a few deep breaths she calmed herself.

  ‘A dream about my father . . . he was an interpreter.’ She spoke so quietly that Zak had to strain to hear her words.

  ‘Was?’

  ‘I think he’s dead,’ she whispered, letting the tears roll down her cheeks.

  Zak moved closer to her but she waved him away again. He felt so awkward standing over her, seeing her this upset so he knelt on the ground to feel closer to her. Aisha was looking straight into his eyes now and seemed to be breathing more easily. ‘In my country, you know, to be an interpreter is a very dangerous job. Sometimes you are not trusted by anyone – translating from one side to the other, people wonder what you might be adding or what you could be taking away from the truth.’

  ‘But I don’t understand. What’s changed since yesterday? How can you know what’s happened to him?’

  Aisha made a fist and held it against her chest. ‘In here, it feels different . . .’

  Zak shook his head. It was his turn not to believe her now.

  ‘You don’t understand . . . I used to listen to BBC Somali service every week to see if my abo’s name was spoken. Sometimes I used to think that even finding out that he is dead would be better than all the waiting and the never knowing. Every year on my birthday I’ve wished for him to come and find me, like he promised, and this year I think he did come, last night in my dream, to say goodbye. When I woke up I was sure he was gone.’

  There was silence between them as Zak tried to take everything in. His dream last night had felt true too, but he couldn’t tell her that. It was clear that she thought that he was still mixed up in his mind, but what Aisha was telling him about her father was just a feeling too. Yet she seemed so sure. Aisha wiped away her tears. Zak stood up and as he did she reached for his hand. He hardly dare to look at her as they walked on together but he wished that she would never let go as he felt the cool smoothness of her skin against his.

  ‘It was your birthday yesterday? Why didn’t you tell us?’ Was all that he could think of to say.

  Aisha shrugged.

  Zak looked up between the great trees. This wood was full of dreams and dream-catchers and dappled light dancing on the earth like spirits from another world, another time, but it was also full of all that was real. It was not a place where you could hide from yourself or from the truth. He felt as if he had sleepwalked into the wood and only now was he beginning to wake up. Perhaps it was the same for Aisha too, finding a way to say goodbye to her father. Something inside him finally felt resolved. If it was the last thing he did, he would prove to Aisha that he was not following trails in the dark.

  Breadcrumbs were scattered skyward then hundreds of pigeons rose in a flurry, pecking and flapping their wings in fighting flight and through this sea of fluttering grey Elder walked. The birds separated, creating a cooing corridor for her entrance. By instinct Aisha and Zak crouched out of sight. Elder turned towards their hiding place and gestured to a path on the far side of a fence. Zak and Aisha followed her gaze. A small white police van was making its way slowly into the wood, until the paths narrowed and it could go no further. A door slammed, and there were urgent voices and the sound of dogs barking and rummaging around in the undergrowth. Two Alsatians came sniffing towards them, but before they could get near, Elder intercepted them. She grabbed their collars and stroked between their eyes until the dogs turned over on their backs like docile puppies and let her tickle their bellies.

  ‘Only the homeless woman!’ one police officer called to the other.

  ‘My name’s Elder!’ she corrected them.

  ‘Are you all right in there, Elder? Need any help?’ the policeman asked.

  ‘Elder’s fine, like good wine, the older the better!’ She laughed at her own joke.

  ‘Is that so? Well, you know we’re always here to take you to the shelter if needs be. We’re still looking for those missing children. You haven’t come across them, have you?’

  She shook her head and stopped stroking the dogs. They stood up, sniffed the air in Zak and Aisha’s direction and then followed the policemen back to the van. It was as if they’d been hypnotized.

  ‘I think she knows we’re here,’ Aisha whispered to Zak.

  ‘She gives me the creeps.’

  Elder started to walk in their direction.

  Zak grabbed Aisha’s arm and pulled her to the side as if he feared that the old woman was about to attack them, but Aisha tugged his arm away and stepped out of the thicket.

  ‘Earthstars landing! Mustn’t spring out at Elder, jumpy old heart, missed a beat.’ Elder patted her chest but she didn’t seem any more bothered by Aisha’s appearance than of the presence of the pigeons that rested on her shoulders.

  ‘You knew we were here!’ Aisha whispered, and Zak came and stood by her side. Elder smiled at him, touched her own head and pointed at Zak where his wound had scabbed over completely.

  ‘Come back to Elder’s healing hands, have you?’

  ‘Why didn’t you tell them we’re here?’ Zak asked.

  ‘None of my business! Elder’s not a busybody. You want to stay, I’m not going to stop you. Free country – that’s what they say anyway . . .’

  ‘You brought us food,’ Aisha said.

  ‘Can’t let my earthstars go hungry.’

  ‘And these poppies,’ Aisha added, indicating the one she wore.

  ‘Poppies for peace, for rest, let the spirits rest, that’s what I say.’

  Elder held out her hand and released a scattering of leaves that floated on the breeze away from her. ‘Little red leaves falling, falling everywhere, poor little mites, bleeding hearts, all Elder wants is peace, peace, peace.’

  ‘Thanks for giving me my wallet back. Could I have my other things?’ Zak asked, biting his lip as he spoke.

  Without warning, Elder grabbed hold of her stick and started thrashing at the earth.

  ‘Ungrateful boy, I made you well.’

  Zak and Aisha began backing away from her. Now that her mood had changed she looked truly insane.

  ‘I had a map . . . I’m looking for a memorial in the wood,’ Zak pursued.

  ‘Look low, low, lower!’ As she spoke she knelt down to the ground.

  Aisha and Zak followed her gaze and ducked down too.

  Elder brandished her stick between the trees towards a thick mound of brambles. ‘All overgrown now, all forgotten.’

  ‘What is?’ Zak asked and Elder spun around, her red hair swirling as the pigeons took flight.

  ‘The dead – who do you think?’

  Zak had grabbed hold of Aisha’s hand and they’d run through the wood, half laughing, half petrified.

  ‘I thought last night was supposed to be Halloween! I don’t care what you say, she’s not right in the head. I’ll have to go back when she’s not around,’ Zak said as they stopped to catch their breath. ‘But it seems like she’s never that far away.’

  Zak was beginning to feel that Elder was drawing them into something deeper than they could understand. Why had she kept their presence in the wood a secret? Even going so far as to cover their tracks from the police?

  Red barked a welcome and ran up the slope to greet them and now she led them towards Iona, whose hoarse singing echoed from the direction of the shelter.

  Zak slowed. The fire had been lit and blankets and clothes were hung around it. A pan had been placed over the flame.

  ‘Where did you two go?’ Iona said, appearing at the entrance.

  ‘For a walk,’ Aisha answered. Zak was grateful to her for not telling Iona about the memorial.

  ‘A walk on the wild side?’ Iona sang, laughing at her own joke. ‘Whatever! You look happy anyway!’

  ‘Just a walk,’ Zak muttered.

  ‘Well, thanks for the invite! But in case you were worrying about Red and me, we’ve had no problem keeping busy, have we girl?’ Iona hugged Red to her and the dog snuggled in close. ‘Want some tea?’ Iona asked, pouring boiling wat
er from the pan into a metal cup, then she spooned sugar into it, added milk and stirred. Iona had placed three logs around the fire, and they sat down and passed Elder’s cup from one to the other. As Aisha sipped she felt her throat and stomach warm through. Now Iona grinned at Aisha, rummaged in one of the bags and lowered some spaghetti into the pan of bubbling water. When it was cooked, she drained it and stirred in some tomato sauce from a jar, before handing the pan to Aisha for the first taste.

  Aisha twirled the spaghetti around the fork and ate a mouthful. ‘Delicious!’ she said. ‘Dream food! Thank you!

  Iona shrugged as if she was so unused to receiving a compliment that she didn’t know what to do with it. ‘Don’t thank me, thank Elder!’

  When they had all swelled their stomachs with pasta, they stretched out beside the fire sleepily. It was incredible how content a full stomach could make you feel. Zak wondered if some of Iona’s grouchiness came from being hungry so much of the time. When she’d pulled up her sleeves to cook, he’d noticed that she carried not a single ounce of fat.

  Aisha sighed. ‘I hope Elder’s not insulted that we ran away from her.’

  ‘I expect she’s used to it. I think she likes having us here.’ Iona took her turn to sip the tea and raised the cup in a toast. ‘To crazy, kind old Elder.’

  ‘It’s the way she just appears out of nowhere that freaks me out,’ Zak said, feeling the heat of the fire thaw his frozen toes.

  ‘And you’re supposed to be our great protector!’ laughed Iona.

  ‘Who said?’ Zak joined in with the laughter.

  ‘Close your eyes, you two,’ Iona ordered, and placed her hands over Zak’s eyes. He pulled away. ‘Don’t worry – I’m not going to eat you!’

  Iona pushed them both towards the shelter and they stumbled. ‘OK, OK, give me your hands.’ She grabbed them and led them one at a time inside.