They were together and nothing else seemed to matter. Confusion caused moisture to prickle behind Jan’s eyelids when she closed her eyes and gave in to the magnitude of raw emotion. She hoped Beck wouldn’t notice.
As she recovered from her orgasm, he slid on protection and entered her. She greedily reached for him, holding him as close as humanly possible while engulfed in more bitter-sweet memories. She let them go and thought only of Beck. Right here. Right now. Soon lost in the tight and controlled muscles of his back, arms and buttocks, she chased away all remorse. His strong thrusts drove her toward another release in record time. No longer feeling like the schoolgirl who’d wanted nothing more than to please him, she answered every move of his with her own. She’d give as well as take, and savor the feel of him inside and out, solid and hot. Real.
Time was suspended, and the world with all of its worries disappeared while they made love. Not one other thought resided in her mind but Beck and the wondrous sensations he gave her.
Deep inside, he found her most responsive spot and brought her to the brink again. Sensing his time was near, she searched for and found his mouth and kissed him hungrily until, at last, sensory overload brought them both to the edge…and over.
CHAPTER SIX
THE next morning Beck scratched his jaw and staggered into the kitchen with a broad smile on his face. He’d shown up last night determined to get revenge by using Jan for sex. Instead, they’d had a fantastic time and he’d given up on his cruel plan. Turned out it was a great idea because now he’d been rewarded by finally getting to sleep an entire night with her! No falling half-asleep and setting the alarm on his watch then scrambling to get dressed before her curfew, like back in high school.
They actually hadn’t had much sleep. Doing the near impossible, his smile stretched even wider.
He’d left her sleeping in a pile of sheets with a clear conscience. To hell with revenge sex, it could never measure up. What they’d done last night had far surpassed anything they’d experienced as teenagers, and they’d spent a hell of a lot of time experimenting back then.
Sweet January—his favorite pin-up girl.
Hold on. She wasn’t worthy of his trust. No matter how great the sex was, he’d stand guard.
Searching in the refrigerator for some eggs and cheese, he noticed a small magnet frame with a happy child’s face peering out at him when he closed the door. He’d failed to notice it last night when surrounded by fantastic aromas and with the full distraction of Jan wearing an apron that said “Kiss the cook” on it.
He closed the door and studied the picture more closely. Cute as a button. Must be a friend’s kid. Ah, but he had breakfast to prepare.
To the best of his recollection, Jan liked cheese omelets as much as pancakes, and since his cooking skills were limited, he’d make the one thing he knew would impress her. Why he wanted to impress the woman who still hadn’t told him why she’d run out on him thirteen years ago, he wasn’t sure. But since it was his goal to find out, an impressive cheese omelet it would be.
While scrabbling in a drawer for a spatula he heard the faint ringing of his cellphone and was on his way to answer it when the best thing he’d seen all morning showed up.
January.
To hell with the phone. He’d check the voice message later.
“Fancy meeting you here,” he said, skimming his fingers along her neck and thinking how smooth her skin was.
“I was hoping you hadn’t left,” she said, accepting his peck on the cheek.
“Why would I leave?” This is the best I’ve felt in ages.
“I don’t know. Hey, is that an omelet I smell?”
He nodded and waggled his eyebrows as though that said it all. Yes, he was her dream lover and personal chef. Payment in kisses would be accepted after the meal.
She’d obviously stopped in the bathroom to freshen up. Her skin was bright and fresh and her hair had been combed. Her simple nightgown called out to be removed.
Immediately.
The spark of his sexy idea got doused by the loud snap and sizzle of butter in the frying pan.
“The coffee’s ready,” he said, shifting back to chef duty and wondering why she was being a little elusive.
“Hey, why don’t we add the leftover asparagus from last night?” she said.
OK, so she wanted to keep things superficial. He could do casual, if that was how she wanted it. “Sounds great to me.”
She opened the refrigerator door while he flipped the fluffy eggs and sprinkled shredded Cheddar cheese over the center. He’d wait until she chopped the asparagus and added it before folding the omelet in half.
He was about to ask her about the cute little munchkin on the refrigerator when he looked up and noticed the picture was missing. Odd.
Jan sautéed the chopped asparagus without uttering a word, and Beck removed the pan from the stove while he waited for her contribution. Where had the responsive and welcoming woman from last night gone, and what was going on in her head?
She scooped the vegetables over the eggs and cheese and he did the honors of folding and sliding the omelet out of the pan and onto a plate. Still no conversation.
Maybe she was as amazed as he was at the sudden turn in their lives, and she’d been dumbstruck. Though the look on Jan’s face as she ate communicated deep thoughts, and her usual sky-blue eyes seemed shrouded with concern rather than amazement. Great. He’d set himself up for rejection again by sleeping with her. Yet he was the one who was supposed to get even.
Had he only imagined how incredible their love-making had been last night? Nah, he couldn’t have conjured up anything as fantastic even if he tried. Maybe she suspected he’d want some answers now that they’d been intimate again. Maybe she knew he expected some answers. Well, she was right, and if she ever wanted him to trust her again, she’d better open up.
Soon, sharing from a single plate, they were down to the last bite. Too bad if she didn’t want to talk about things. He needed to know. Beck couldn’t hold back the burning question in his heart another moment. “When I came home for leave, were you really in modeling school?”
Nothing short of panic registered in her eyes, though she quickly hid it. Years ago, he’d spent months trying to figure out what had gone wrong between them. He’d finally come to the conclusion that she hadn’t been able to handle being close to him and having him leave, so she’d run away from him.
All he’d ever talked about had been adventure and his desire to see the world. Where would a woman, or a seventeen-year-old girl, fit into that plan? Don’t try to see it her way or let your guard down. She owes you some answers.
Beck was due to ship out on a six-month tour of duty after his month at Mercy Hospital. Jan knew that. They’d gotten a hell of a lot closer last night than he’d ever expected. Was she thinking history was going to repeat itself? Maybe it was too much for her. He gazed back into her startled face, retreat already apparent in her eyes.
Jan had been carefully guarding her thoughts about how important it was to tell Beck the truth. And the sooner the better. She’d pretended that she’d enjoyed the eggs, and that they’d been tasty and light instead of bitter. When he’d hit her with the direct question about their past, the sour taste of bile had risen up the back of her throat.
She’d felt so devious slipping the forgotten magnet picture from the refrigerator and hiding it in the gadget drawer when he hadn’t been looking. What kind of deceitful person had she turned into? And now he’d flat out asked the one question she feared the most.
They’d had one extraordinary night together. Could she dare hope for more with the huge secret looming like a dark cloud over their heads? The optimistic side of her hoped she could build on this new energy springing to life between them before she told him the whole story. But how long would he settle for bits and pieces before he’d grow frustrated and angry at her evasiveness?
She swallowed back the bitter taste. “I moved up north.”
>
She dreaded what his next question would be, knowing she didn’t have any response that wouldn’t be an out-and-out lie. Could she lie to Beck again?
“Why?” He uttered the last question in the world she wanted to face.
Her shoulders slumped and her eyes closed. She inhaled, praying for strength. She’d already told him her stock answer about modeling school. He hadn’t bought it.
His cellphone rang a decidedly odd jingle, the Monday night televised football theme, and cut through the extended silence.
Beck’s eyes grew wary, his expression sharpened. “I’ve got to answer that. It’s the SWAT team tactical alert ring.”
He tore out of the kitchen, leaving Jan alone to calm her shaking hands and galloping heart.
A moment later he reappeared. “I’ve got to go. There’s a bank robbery with hostages going down in Silverlake. All SWAT units have been called in.”
He dressed fast but slowed down long enough to take Jan into his arms and kiss her breathless at the door. His morning stubble prickled her lips and cheeks, and sent shivers across her shoulders. He delved into her eyes, making her fear he could read the terror in her mind, seeing not only her secret but her new-found concerns for his safety.
“We’ll pick up this conversation later,” he said, then kissed her forehead before he left.
With a heavy heart she watched him jog toward his motorcycle and worried about what awaited him on the streets. She wanted Beck to be safe and come back to her even though she knew the very next time they were together she’d have to tell him everything.
She owed it to him.
“Be careful!” was all she could manage to call after him.
By the time Jan arrived at work that afternoon, every TV in every single emergency patient room had the live news coverage blaring out about the ongoing botched bank robbery and the subsequent hostage situation. Carmen gave a blow-by-blow narrative of the situation to the other nurses. Even Gavin seemed fascinated by the modern-day Bonnie and Clyde situation.
“They’re releasing two more hostages,” Carmen announced. “That leaves six. Wouldn’t you love to hear the negotiations?”
“No,” Jan said, biting back her anxiety and trying instead to focus on her job. At least there hadn’t been any gunfire or loss of life as yet. A wave of butterflies stretched their wings in her stomach. She grabbed a patient chart and went into the only patient room without the TV on, hoping to distract herself. A few minutes later, in the middle of starting an IV, she heard the pop, pop, pop of televised gunfire, and the newscaster’s hushed voice suddenly call out, “Things have escalated into an old-fashioned gunfight. There’s a man down. No. Two.”
Jan rushed to the door to see the nearest TV. The reporter and cameraman had obviously run for cover while filming a shaky newscast.
The studio anchor took over. “It appears that two people have been shot. It’s not clear if the wounded are the bank robbers or the hostages.”
More pop-pop-popping broke out, but this time it sounded like fireworks. Jan forced herself back to the patient’s bedside and finished attaching the IV with a shaky hand and started the IVAC machine to deliver the fluid at 125 cc an hour. Her mind whirled with thoughts, each more horrendous than the last.
Always so drawn out in movies, the tense real-life drama had already come to an end by the time she’d returned to the nurses’ station. Several bodies were strewn around the ground in front of the bank. The same on-the-scene reporter yapped on about the chaos and possible loss of life. He described the pools of blood and the grim atmosphere in breathless tones.
Jan strained to hear if any of the police officers involved had also been injured and got woozy with fear for Beck.
“Two SWAT guys got shot!” Carmen reported, glancing toward Jan with concern in her eyes. “Is Beck there?”
Jan clutched the counter to keep from swaying, and nodded.
Gavin strode toward the nurses’station, brows furrowed above serious dark eyes. “Discharge anyone who isn’t an emergency,” he said to the residents and other doctors. “We’re going to need all our manpower for the casualties.” He turned to Carmen. “Notify surgery. Get the triage stations ready to go. As of now, we’re on Code Orange.”
An hour later the ER was overrun with multiple incoming casualties and swarming with EMTs and policemen. Jan assisted a third-year resident as she placed a chest tube in one of the wounded hostages guilty of nothing more than being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Once she’d taped the tube in place, they rolled the gurney toward the back of the ER where the orderly waited with a nurse to transport the patient to the ER holding area while waiting for surgery.
Jan glanced up in time to see a group of SWAT officers dressed in full military-style gear from navy-blue jumpsuits with metal helmets to protective Kevlar vests and heavy-duty combat boots. They’d just brought in one of their own. Frantic, Jan searched the gurney to see if it was Beck.
She heard her name and turned. There he was, standing before her, surprisingly clean-looking for someone who’d just been involved in that kind of incident. Her heart doubled its rhythm. He wrapped his hand around her wrist and tugged her down the hall toward the utility kitchen as she tried to catch her breath. Once inside, she fell into his arms in a rush of relief and confusion. She buried her face against the steel of his bulletproof vest, surprised that the covering material was soft, and languished there while she tried to make sense of things. His arms wrapped her tight, offering momentary security.
“I was scared to death you’d been shot,” she whispered.
“Not even close.” He kissed the top of her head. “But my partner took a bullet in the abdomen, just below his vest, and he’s in bad shape.”
“Where is he?”
“We just brought him in. Gavin’s taking care of him. The sooner they get him to surgery the better his chances.”
“Let me go help,” she said, breaking away.
He stopped her and pulled her back long enough to kiss her. The amazing feel of his lips on hers steadied her nerves better than any sedative could have. She lingered to enjoy his taste and smiled against his mouth as a quick buzz thrummed through her body. She could tell he felt it, too. But, then, they’d always shared something extraordinary.
Thank God Beck hadn’t been injured.
Two in the morning Jan tossed and turned, trying to settle down her nerves and allow her over-stimulated brain and extra-fatigued body to rest. They’d worked non-stop in the ER stabilizing patient after patient from the bank robbery. Ten in all. Both bank robbers were dead, and six hostages had been wounded, along with the two SWAT officers. The last she’d heard, Beck’s partner had pulled through surgery, though he’d wound up with a partial colectomy and was in the ICU. His condition was still touch and go and would remain so for several days, but she prayed he’d make it and be able to go home to his family.
Life would be a never-ending prayer of concern if she were to be with Beck again. If not his military service, his police duties would always be a barrier between them. She couldn’t live with the constant worry any more than he could put up with her secrets. The sooner she told him about Meghan, the sooner he’d be out of her life…again.
She punched her pillow into submission and heard a faint tapping on her front door. Before she could respond, her phone rang. She answered on the first ring.
“It’s me,” Beck said. “Let me in.”
Scrambling out of bed, she rushed toward the door. There Beck stood in civilian clothes looking worn out but outrageously handsome.
He flashed his famous smile. Long dimples cut deep into his cheeks. “May I come in?”
She stepped aside. “Of course.” Her heart raced at the sight of him, but more so because of what she knew she needed to do. He didn’t give her a chance to take a breath.
“It felt a little too much like war out there today. I keep expecting more gunfire or a car bomb. I was hanging out in ICU with some of the other guys, but wen
t home. Can’t sleep. Thought maybe you’d like some company.” He lifted his brows, looking so vulnerable she opened her arms to welcome him.
He swept in and practically lifted her off the floor to kiss her. She responded to him with the depth of emotion circulating throughout her body. He groaned and kicked the front door closed with his foot.
He walked her backwards to her bedroom and lowered her to the bed. He had her undressed in a heartbeat, kissing and touching and smoothing her skin. Within seconds she was ready for him, though he seemed to force himself to slow the pace.
“Let’s take our time,” he rasped over her neck between warm, wet kisses.
She inhaled, bracketed his face with her hands, and whispered, “Whatever you say…” before drawing him closer for another smoldering kiss.
Just before dawn, Beck withdrew and rolled off Jan then pulled her limp and satisfied body onto his chest. His hand danced down the slope of her spine and came to rest on the silken soft round of her rump. She sighed and cuddled into the crook of his arm and rested her head on his shoulder.
Holding her so naturally brought on a deluge of memories.
“How in the hell did we ever lose track of each other?” he asked.
She lifted her head and glanced lazily at him with hooded eyes, causing a new surge of desire to pulse through his nerves. Before she could answer he broke in.
“It’s been eating me up for years. I told you I loved you and I meant it. You said you loved me.” She stiffened under his grasp. “What went wrong?”
She swallowed slightly and sat up. A pleading expression, a cut-and-run panic, formed in her eyes. “Beck,” she whispered. “I did love you. I meant it when I told you I loved you, but…” She lifted his hand and kissed his fingertips with fevered lips. “Please. Try to understand.”
Temporary Doctor, Surprise Father Page 9