by Sarah Morgan
What did Alessandro need to discuss on his own?
And why was his mother looking so disapproving?
She was about to replenish her lipstick when she heard female laughter outside the door. Anxious to avoid everyone, Tasha slipped into one of the cubicles and locked the door.
‘I mean, he’s utterly gorgeous,’ a female voice said, ‘so you can hardly blame him for not wanting to settle down.’
‘He is gorgeous, but an utter bastard. Fancy bringing another girl to the wedding of the year.’
‘You have to feel sorry for her. He’s just using her to send his ex-girlfriend a message.’
Tasha opened her mouth. She wanted to alert them to the fact that she was there so that they’d stop talking, but no sound came out.
‘It’s a double blow to Miranda. First she loses Antonio and now Alessandro. I mean, he hasn’t even ditched her for someone royal. Or even someone well connected. That girl he’s with is just ordinary—like you or me.’
‘Not like you or me.’ Her friend gave a catty laugh. ‘She didn’t even know who designed her dress.’
‘That’s probably because it’s the first time she’s ever worn a designer dress.’
‘And it will be the last. I’m sure he only brought her here to make a very public point to his mother. Judging from the bodyguards outside the library, they’re having the conversation right now. What wouldn’t I give to be a fly on the wall? Can I borrow your lip gloss? I left mine at that nightclub last weekend.’
‘Do you think she knows that he was supposed to be marrying Miranda?’
Tasha frowned. No, that wasn’t right. Miranda had been his brother’s fiancée.
‘Little Miss Ordinary? Shouldn’t think so. If she doesn’t know her dress designer, she’s hardly going to be up on palace politics, is she?’
‘I thought it was common knowledge that everyone is waiting for an official announcement of the engagement between Alessandro and Miranda.’ There was a pause. ‘Does this shade look too red on me?’
‘No, it’s perfect. I heard she’s been looking after him.’
‘Oh, well, the poor thing is in for a rude awakening when she discovers what he’s like. Still, this will probably still be the most exciting thing that ever happens in her life. She’s just a nurse.’
Alessandro and Miranda?
Alessandro and Miranda?
Shaking all over, Tasha exited the cubicle. ‘Actually, I’m a doctor,’ she said, her voice robotic, ‘but some of my best friends are nurses, so I’d be grateful if you didn’t talk about them as if they’re second-class citizens. Next time you fall off your horse, it may be one of them saving your life. And, just for the record, that shade is definitely too red for you. It’s very ageing.’ Without pausing, she swept out of the room, grateful that whoever had designed her dress had given her sufficient fabric with which to make a dignified exit.
He was supposed to be marrying Miranda. His brother’s fiancée.
The tears lodged in a lump at the back of her throat, she continued to walk even when she heard Princess Eleanor calling her name.
‘Natasha.’
Tasha thought about pretending she hadn’t heard, but then turned, her expression blank. ‘I’m just leaving, Your Highness.’
‘I need to tell you a few things about Alessandro.’
‘Actually, no, you don’t. I’m the one who needs to tell you a few things about Alessandro.’ As the last thread of her control snapped, Tasha’s temper bubbled over. ‘Do you know that he doesn’t sleep at night because he blames himself for his brother’s death? Do you know that he believes that you would have preferred him to be killed? He’s living with that, and you’re not doing anything to stop it.’
Shocked, the woman stared at her. ‘Do you know to whom you’re speaking?’
‘Yes.’ Tasha’s lips tightened. ‘I’m speaking to a woman who hasn’t called her son once in the past six weeks except to nag him about official duties.’
‘I have a responsibility towards my country.’
‘You also have a responsibility towards your son.’
The other woman straightened her shoulders. ‘You seem very concerned about Alessandro’s well-being.’
‘I’m a doctor,’ Tasha said smoothly. ‘I’m trained to deal with the physical and the psychological. And, by the way, that child playing over by the tree looks as though she has measles. You might want to remove her from all those people because she’ll be infectious. Excuse me. I’m leaving now.’ Wondering whether she was about to be arrested for insubordination, Tasha turned away, continuing her walk towards the exit.
Damn and double damn.
Her heart was hammering, her palms were damp and her hands were shaking.
She’d lost her temper again.
Wasn’t she ever going to learn?
‘Tasha! Tash!’
Hearing Alessandro’s voice behind her, she quickened her pace. The last thing she wanted was to speak to him.
When a strong male hand closed over her shoulder, she shook him off. ‘Let go of me.’ Furious, she whirled around and faced him. ‘You are an utter bastard and I hate you. I hope your bloody horse falls on your other leg and breaks it.’
He stared at her, stunned. ‘You’re upset about the way my mother spoke to you and I don’t blame you, but—’
‘I’m not upset with your mother. I’m upset with you for not telling me the truth.’ Steaming mad, Tasha turned on him, eyes blazing. ‘Why the hell didn’t you mention Miranda to me? I knew she was engaged to your brother. Why didn’t you mention that you’d taken over that role, too?’
His expression altered instantly and she suddenly felt like sobbing.
Instead, she punched him in his bruised ribs. ‘Damn you, Sandro. I wanted you to deny it. I—I hate you.’
‘You don’t understand—’
‘I understand perfectly. You were laid up in Cornwall so you thought you’d have some fun. And that’s fine, because I had fun too. But you didn’t need to bring me here and use me to send some message to your girlfriend.’ Her voice rose but she didn’t care. ‘You used me. If you wanted me to come to this wedding so that you could send your girlfriend some sort of message, you at least should have had the decency to tell me.’
A muscle flickered in his jaw. ‘That isn’t what I was doing.’
‘Don’t lie to me, Alessandro. I want to go home and I want to go home now.’ Before she made even more of a fool of herself in public.
‘Before you go, my mother would very much like to talk to you again. If you still want to go after that, I’ll take you myself.’
‘I don’t want you to take me yourself. I’m perfectly capable of driving.’ Snapping the words out, Tasha dragged her shoulder out of his grip. ‘And I don’t need to talk to your mother. Everything that needs to be said has been said.’
Suddenly she felt herself crumbling. ‘Why did you bring me? It was cruel, Alessandro. Really cruel.’
He stood in perfect stillness. ‘I wanted to see whether you would enjoy yourself.’
‘Enjoy being mocked? Enjoy being ridiculed? I’m not that much of a masochist.’ Her voice felt thick as she struggled to push the words past the tears. ‘So now we’ve established that you should have brought someone else, I’d like to leave.’
Seeing a pack of journalists approach, Alessandro snapped his fingers and a sleek black car appeared from nowhere. ‘Take Dr O’Hara back to my house. We’ll talk later. In private. There are things I want to say to you.’
‘Nothing I want to hear.’ Tasha climbed into the back of the car, stumbling over the hem of her dress. The moment the car pulled away, she leaned forward and gave the driver a different address.
She had no intention of going back to Alessandro’s house ever again.
It was over.
Josh rapped on the door of Megan’s cottage. It had been weeks since he’d slept properly. Not since the morning he’d arrived home to find Rebecca waiting in the kitche
n.
He’d been thinking about nothing but this moment—trying to find another way.
But there was only one way.
A seagull shrieked overhead and he could smell the sea. Normally he would have breathed deeply and enjoyed his surroundings, but there was nothing normal about today.
When Megan opened the door it took all his self-control not to drag her into his arms for one last time. ‘Hi. I should have called, I know, but—’
‘Come in.’ She stood back and he saw hope flicker in her eyes.
It made it all the harder to step over the threshold because he knew he was going to kill that hope dead for ever.
Once before she’d trusted him with her heart and he’d broken it.
He was about to do the same again.
Blissfully unaware of what was coming, Megan walked in front of him to the kitchen. The house overlooked the beautiful sweep of Penhally Bay. He knew she’d had countless offers from developers. He also knew she’d never accept any of them. The house had been her grandmother’s and for Megan the emotional ties were as powerful as the lure of the idyllic surroundings.
‘Can I get you something to drink?’
‘Just water. Thanks.’
‘Water?’ She gave a hesitant laugh. ‘Josh the party animal drinking water?’
He ran his hand over the back of his neck, thinking of all the times he’d broken bad news to patients. It never came easily, but somehow he managed it. Because this was personal, it was almost impossible to form the words. ‘We have to talk.’
‘I agree.’ Calm, she lifted a jug from the fridge and poured a glass of filtered water.
Josh watched as the water sloshed onto the side and then suddenly realised she wasn’t as calm as she pretended to be.
‘Do you want lemon? Ice?’
‘For God’s sake, Megan—’ He prised the jug out of her hand even as he brought his mouth down on hers. He felt her gasp of shock and then she was kissing him back, her fingers curling tight into the front of his shirt as if she was afraid he was going to vanish.
It was crazy, insane, stupid, but he couldn’t stop himself. His hands were buried in her hair and he was kissing her with a desperation that went bone deep. ‘I love you.’ He groaned the words against her mouth, ‘I love you, sweetheart.’
‘Oh, Josh …’ Her voice broke and she made a sound somewhere between a sob and a laugh. ‘I—’
‘I love you so much, which is why this is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.’ With supreme difficulty, he drew back, forcing himself to do what had to be done. ‘That night we spent together was incredible—’
‘I know that, Josh.’ Her voice was whisper-soft. ‘I know, and—’
‘No.’ This time his voice was harsh, and he stepped back from her because he knew that if she stopped him now he’d never be able to say what needed to be said. ‘You have to listen. You have to let me speak.’
Her eyes were startled. ‘All right. Speak.’
‘That night was so special. You have no idea.’ He raked his fingers through his hair. ‘When I left you that morning you were all I could think about.’
A tiny frown touched her forehead and she gave a bemused shake of her head. ‘Josh, what on earth is wrong? You’re making me nervous, I—I don’t understand. Why shouldn’t you love me? Why shouldn’t I love you? I know it’s been a bumpy road getting here, but—’
‘I can’t be in love with you.’ He clenched his jaw as he saw her flinch.
‘But—’
‘Rebecca is pregnant.’ His tone was raw and the words burned his chest. ‘She’s having a child.’
Megan stood very still. Behind them sunshine poured through the window but neither of them noticed. ‘But … that’s good, surely? It means she’s moved on. She has another relationship.’ Her voice faltered. ‘Josh? Why are you looking at me like that? What’s wrong?’
He couldn’t remember ever crying. When his father had walked out he hadn’t cried. Even that night Megan had been brought into A and E and he’d failed to save their baby, he hadn’t managed to cry. But this time, for some reason, the obstruction in his throat was an immovable object.
‘Megan …’ He couldn’t form the words. It was the hardest thing he’d ever had to say. The hardest thing he’d ever had to do. ‘It’s my child. Rebecca is having my baby.’ He watched as the hope in her eyes turned dull. Watched as love drained away, leaving nothing but pools of pain.
‘But—if that’s true then it means …’ Tears glistened in her eyes and she gave a sharp gasp and backed away from him. ‘You told me the marriage was over. You told me—’
‘It was.’
‘But you were still having sex with her?’ Her voice rose and she wrapped her arms around herself in a gesture of self-protection. ‘We clearly have a very different idea about what constitutes “over”. Oh, my God.’ Agitated, she paced to the far side of the room and pressed her hands to her mouth. ‘I would never have slept with you that night if I’d thought you were still together.’
‘We weren’t together.’ Josh walked over to her but she whirled round, her eyes fierce.
‘Don’t touch me!’ She backed away, the sob lodged in her throat. ‘How could you? How could you do that? You were sleeping with me and your wife at the same time?’
‘No!’
‘She’s pregnant, Josh.’
‘It was just one night, weeks before you and I …’ He sucked in a breath and spread his hands. ‘I can’t even explain it—’
‘I suggest you don’t even try.’ The chill in her voice was agonising to hear.
‘It was a mistake. Megan, she did it on purpose. She wanted a baby. This was her way of keeping us together.’
‘You told me the marriage was over. You told me it was mutual.’ The tears slid down her cheeks. ‘But you had sex with her, Josh.’ She was crying openly now. ‘You had sex with her.’
The memory brought a bitter taste to his mouth. ‘It was just once.’
‘Is that supposed to make it OK? Because I can assure you it doesn’t. It’s not OK, Josh.’ She scrubbed the tears from her cheeks with her hand and the frantic attempt to hide her distress was more disturbing than any accusation she could fling at him. ‘You say you love me and then you tell me this? How do you think that makes me feel?’
Josh closed his eyes. ‘Megan—’
‘She can give you the one thing I can’t give you.’ Her voice cracked and she lifted her head to look at him, resignation in her eyes. ‘She can give you a child and I can’t compete with that.’
‘I love you, Megan. And I’m telling you that because I don’t want there to be any misunderstanding about what happened here. I truly love you, but no child of mine will grow up as I did, without a father. I won’t do that. I have to make this work. For the child’s sake.’
‘Yes. Of course you do.’ Her lips were stiff and her voice was a flat monotone. ‘You’re going to make it work, I know you will. You’ll be a very happy family, you, Rebecca and the baby. If you don’t mind, I’d like you to leave now.’
Josh opened his mouth to fight that request and then realised that she was holding herself together with difficulty. And so was he.
With one last look at her trembling frame, he turned and strode out of her cottage.
A happy family?
Not in this lifetime.
CHAPTER TEN
FURIOUSLY angry, Tasha stormed out of the car. It was dark, and the familiar smells and sounds of Penhally Bay should have soothed her throbbing head. Instead she just wanted to punch someone.
Remembering her manners, she leaned back into the car and thanked the driver.
‘You’ve been brilliant,’ she muttered, ‘and thank you for taking me to the house to collect my stuff. Sorry about the ranting and raving during the journey. Just forget everything you heard me say.’
Alessandro’s driver cleared his throat. ‘Actually, it was quite a revelation. Usually His Highness’s female friends depart
crying. I keep tissues in my glove compartment.’
‘Maybe you could add a shotgun.’
‘Most women aren’t like you, Dr O’Hara.’ The man gave a regretful smile. ‘Unfortunately. It’s been a pleasure driving you these past few weeks.’
‘Thanks, Mario. I just hope your bastard boss—sorry, I mean His Royal Highness—doesn’t fire you for giving me a lift here.’
‘No worries, Dr O’Hara. I’ll get your cases from the boot.’ Mario moved round the car but Tasha was already there.
‘I’ve got it.’ She hauled the cases out of the boot so violently that the driver took a step back.
‘They’re heavy—’
‘You’d be amazed how much weight I can lift when I’m steaming mad.’
Alessandro had humiliated her publicly. Again.
She’d trusted him …
Later she knew it was all going to hurt badly, but right now she was running on adrenaline in pure undiluted fury.
She took her surfboard from Mario and tucked it under her arm. ‘Thanks.’
‘Are you sure you’ll be OK?’ Concern in his eyes, he watched as she hitched the once-glamorous dress up around her waist. ‘I’ll just wait while you check your friend is in.’
‘No need. I know she’s in. I just texted her. Thanks for bringing me here and for being so kind.’
‘You’re welcome. You have my mobile number. If you need to go anywhere, call and I’ll come and pick you up.’ With a last concerned look at her face, he drove off and Tasha heard the door of the cottage open.
‘Tash?’ Megan stood in the doorway and Tasha turned and strode towards her, dragging her cases behind her.
‘Thanks so much for letting me come here. I couldn’t stay at Sandro’s, and if I went to Josh’s he just would have said I told you so, and then I would have given him a black eye. And to be honest—’ She stopped in mid-rant as she saw the look on Megan’s face. ‘Oh, my God—what happened to you? You look—you’re—Megan?’