by Ria Cantrell
“Mom,” Tom said wistfully. “I’m probably going to be subletting my apartment. I’m going to be away for quite a while.”
“What do you mean? I thought you just started a new job,” Deirdre’s voice faltered. She didn’t want to sound like a critical, overbearing mother. Still, she worried about Tom’s impulsive nature at times. Yes, he was all grown up now and he could make his decisions without her, but it was impetuous things like this that reminded her how different he truly was from Dan and herself. She supposed that Tommy was probably more like his birth parents then she and her husband. She didn’t fault him; it was something that was part of his genetic makeup, but sometimes she wished Tommy would settle down and be just a little more like her dependable good doctor Dan Callum.
Tommy saw the masked look in his mother’s eyes. He knew that she would probably have reservations about his choices but when she heard the news, Tommy was certain that his mother would be absolutely elated with the fantastic opportunity that had been granted to him.
“Mom, I have only recently started my job with that advertising agency. It’s true and it is a good job. But, a couple of weeks ago, this group of promoters were at the pub where I was singing and they liked what they heard. They said that I had a true Celtic sound and they thought I would be perfect to join with this group of guys to tour and sing. They wanted me to do a formal audition out here in California to see if I would fit well with the other guys in the group.”
Deirdre relaxed a little. It was only an audition and the chances of getting the part in the company of the show was probably slim at best. She did not want to discourage Tommy, but she wasn’t sure giving up his job and apartment was the wisest idea. If it was difficult to make a go of things in California, it was even harder to succeed in a place like New York City. She pasted a smile on her face and said, “Ah, so you are here for the audition.”
“Well, no not exactly.”
With an endearing smile that reminded Deirdre of the little boy he had been not so long ago, Tommy explained, “Mom, I auditioned yesterday. I didn’t want anyone to know I was doing it until after it happened. Mom, I got the gig. All those times you gave me music lessons and Gaelic lessons paid off. Isn’t it fantastic? I will be singing with this major production. It’s a big stage show, you know; lights, costumes, amazing orchestrations. It’s called Celtic Storm.”
Deirdre needed to hide her feelings because it sounded too good to be true. Show biz was a tough life to live and it took its toll on the best of them in the business. Having lived in California most of her life, Deirdre saw the fallen stars that paved the road to Hollywood and sometimes it was a tragic end to a once promising career. She didn’t want that for her son. The truth of the matter, though, was that it was a fantastic opportunity even if she was leery about it. She knew that she had done her duty to raise the son of her heart properly and it was time to let him fly, now. She gazed upon her son who was no longer that little boy. No. He was a grown man now. When had that happened?
As she looked closer at Tommy, she observed how handsome he had become. Gone was the scrawny and sickly little boy who struggled with asthma. Now he was well-built and strong. He must have been working out, too, since he moved to New York. Deirdre could see thick, developed muscles in her son’s once thin and slight frame. He was tall with dark hair that he wore a little too long for her liking but she was sure it made him quite popular with the girls. He had grey eyes which were very unusual, really, but on Tom, it only enhanced his rugged good looks. He was broad in the shoulder and Deirdre realized that her son had become everything she had hoped him to be; big and healthy; handsome and strong. Yup, he was going to be the heartthrob of this group of Celtic musicians. Deirdre was certain of that. Taking a deep breath, Deirdre stepped forward and hugged Tommy hard. She breathed, “It is great news, honey. They picked the right guy. My baby’s gonna’ be a star.”
With a winsome grin, Tom said, “Oh, I don’t know about that but it seemed too good an opportunity to pass up. I mean, if nothing else, I’m going to get to see parts of the world with the tour of the show. We start rehearsals here next week and in about a month after that we will start putting the show on the road. I was hoping I could stay here while we do the rehearsals.”
“Of course. There’s no point in you renting a place for a few weeks. Besides, it will give me a ‘Tommy fix’ until you finish the leg of the tour. I suspect you will be gone for weeks if not months at a time.”
“Yeah, mom, we will. But I won’t be around much in the next few weeks, either. Rehearsals start early and end late.”
“Of course,” Deirdre said, masking her disappointment.
“I just don’t want you to be sad, mom, if I can’t be around too much before we head off.”
“No. I won’t,” she lied. She knew she needed to cut the apron strings and she would have to start sooner than later. Sure, he had moved to New York and that was hard on her, but something about the idea of him traveling with a performance company seemed so much more final. She shrugged off the sense of foreboding that suddenly trilled up her spine. She had to be happy for her son. This was a big deal. It truly was. Pushing the uneasiness to the back of her mind, Deirdre said, “Well, go put your stuff away and have a rest. Dinner won’t be ready for a while yet and you must be tired from your drive out here.”
“Yeah, I am a little, now that you mention it, but I actually have lots of phone calls to make. One of my friends is willing to sublet my place, but I have to fly back for a quick trip to pack what I will need to take with me and to make some final arrangements before I go.”
Tommy stood and pulling his mom in to give her a kiss, he said, “Thanks for letting me crash here, Mom. It’s about a forty minute drive but it would be easier than trying to find a place on such short notice. You’re the best, Mom. I love you.”
With another quick peck on her cheek, Tommy bounded up the stairs to his bedroom, taking his backpack with him. Deirdre put her hand up to her cheek and she sighed. She had always known that Tommy was hers on loan; ever since finding him in the hospital some twenty-two years ago. She knew there would come a day when she would have to “give him back” and even though he had set out on his own last year, somehow she always hoped he would find his way home. Now her day of reckoning was at hand. She could feel it looming before her as sure as she could still feel Tommy’s kiss on her cheek.
Later that evening as they sat around the dinner table having an early Thanksgiving feast of sorts in honor of their brief reunion, Deirdre watched as her son and husband talked excitedly about Thomas’ plans. She mostly listened as her heart grew heavier. Something whispered to her that Tom would find his destiny after all; a destiny that she could not share. Deirdre suddenly felt every bit of her 50 plus years. Still, she pasted a smile on her face and gave the customary responses that actually seemed more than a little forced.
After the dishes were cleared, Tom announced that he was going out for a while with some of the other guys he had met during the audition. They were going to hit a local pub and with a wink he said, “Don’t wait up guys. There’s always plenty of pretty girls hanging around and if we get to jamming in the place I might even persuade one for a late-night date.”
Grabbing his jacket and swinging it over his shoulder, Tom left whistling a tune.
Dan Callum came behind his wife while she stood at the sink rinsing the dishes from their meal. He circled her waist and he kissed the back of her neck.
“What’s wrong, Dee? You barely spoke five words during dinner.”
Deirdre continued sponging the dishes and she said, “It’s nothing. I’m fine.”
“Come on, Dee. We’ve been together a long time. I know you better than that. What’s up?”
Keeping her face turned to her work, she said, “It’s just that I hope Tom is not rushing into this crazy….”
Dan took the dishes from Deirdre and laid them in the sink. Taking the dishtowel from her shoulder, he took her hands and dri
ed them, holding them between his own strong fingers and he turned Deirdre to face him.
“It’s an amazing opportunity for him, Dee. He has the talent. He is young enough to do it now and he may not get the opportunity again. Celtic music is big these days. Look at the success of things like Riverdance and Celtic Woman. Besides, it will be a good use for those years we gave him singing and taking music lessons.”
“Those were so his lungs could be strengthened. Not so he could go traipsing around the world on some wild goose chase for fame and who knows what,” Deirdre said a little crossly.
“Hey, hey. This isn’t about him going on a wild goose chase, is it? What’s really bothering you?”
Without too much provocation and little warning, Deirdre’s face seemed to crumple and though she tried to still the quiver in her voice, errant tears rose in her eyes and she said, “We’re going to lose him, Dan. I just know it.”
Dan drew her into his arms and he said, “Shhh, now. He’s a grown man, Dee. We knew this day was going to come. Besides, you were not this upset when he decided to move to New York. What’s so different about this?”
“This is different, Danny. I can’t explain it but it’s something I feel deep inside.”
Dan took Deirdre to the sofa and sat her down. He dabbed her tears away with the damp dishtowel and he cleared his throat. Then he said, “Look, you have raised him and cared for him and we have prepared him for his independence. We’ve done our job, Dee. It’s time for him to make a life for himself and it should be a life of his choosing.”
“All…all I’ve ever wanted was…was for him to be happy and healthy.”
Deirdre hiccupped as a sob escaped her. Dan stroked his wife’s hair and he noticed it suddenly was a little grayer than he remembered. He knew Deirdre had found maternal fulfillment in the raising and loving of the little boy who seemed to have fallen from the stars into their lives. He said, “He is healthy and he is happy, Dee. You’ve done a hell of a job but he’s a man now. He’s a free spirit. We have to let him be who he is. He isn’t like us. But that doesn’t mean we can’t love him for who he is. He’s talented, Dee. Hell, I wish I could sing like him. It’s time to cut those apron strings whether we like it or not. He’s almost twenty-five years old. He’s not a baby anymore. Have you looked at him lately?”
“Of course I have,” she snapped brushing the fresh tears off of her face.
“I mean really looked at him, Dee. He’s a strapping lad. He’s built like a brick shit house. He’s not that sickly little boy anymore and he really hasn’t been for a very long time. I know it’s hard to let him go but we would risk all we have worked for and no less.”
“But, but…what if he finds her?”
“Then he finds her. It’s not like you hadn’t tried. I doubt he will find her if we couldn’t. Besides, he’s known he was adopted for most of his life. I’m sure he has lots of questions that need to be answered. Wouldn’t you?”
Deirdre nodded and sniffled ungracefully. “Yes, I suppose you are right. I have questions and so why wouldn’t he?”
“See? But the odds of him finding her are slim to none. Now go wash your face and I’ll get us a glass of wine.”
Dan was so good to her. He knew just the right words to say when things were bothering her. They had been through so much together and Dan knew her like an open book. It gave Deirdre comfort to know that the relationship that she had with her husband all these years continued to be a source of strength and commitment. How she wished those things for her son.
Dan was right. Tommy had to find his own place in the world. She had done everything right to raise him to the man he was now. Still, the ache grew in her heart at the thought of losing Thomas completely. As Dan went to the sink to finish the dishes, he smiled at his wife and the sadness in her heart abated in the knowledge of the power of their bond.
~
Chapter Five – Scotland, 1387~
Bronwyn laid her head on Drew’s shoulder. No matter how many years had passed, she always felt contentment when she was by his side. He stroked her back lazily; their passion sated now in the early hours of the dark of night. Drew loved this woman with all his heart and he hated when things caused her worries or grief. He had only just returned and learned of the missive in order by writ of the English king and his Scottish cousin. While it was a great honor to house royalty when they went on progress, it would be a source of hardship and great stress for all of his household and outlying lands. His chest welled with pride because if anyone could manage the task, Drew knew it would be Bronwyn.
He had learned long ago that Bronwyn was a woman of great determination and fortitude. He would do everything possible to aid her. After all, it was his English blood that was bringing the young monarch to their doorsteps. Drew pondered the visit. If Richard of Bordeaux was anything like his predecessors, Bronwyn was right to be apprehensive. He, himself, had suffered at the hands of the maniacal grandfather of this young king and Bronwyn had been bartered as a pawn for a peace that never really came.
As Drew stroked the woman in his arms, he thought on how fate had held the key to their lives and he was pretty certain that it was all worth it in the end. Still, the memory of the honor beating he had received at the hands of Richard’s grandfather lingered though the stripes on his back had long faded. Sadly, the memory of it remained for both of them. Drew sighed. This king was supposedly not like his grandfather or for that matter his father, the Black Prince. It would remain to be seen.
Neither he nor Bronwyn could sleep. Andrew had half a mind to get up and begin the work needed to receive the royal progress. The larders had to be increased and game had to be caught in order to provide the many feasts during the king’s brief but taxing stay. Only, it was many hours yet before even a little light would cast out the blackness of night so Drew would not get much done until dawn presented itself. He sighed as he logically stayed in his bed and he prayed they would both be able to get a little rest before the onslaught of the unwelcomed visit by the Royals which could wreak havoc on their peaceful little world. So too, in the morning Drew would seek his beloved daughter and plead with her to not be unreasonable and to cooperate with her mother. Drew dragged his fingers through his hair and blew out his breath. God’s teeth! It was time Jenna wed someone; anyone. She needed a good man who would understand her wild ways and who would love her. If only Jenna would be open to the possibility.
Drew wanted Jenna to marry for love but she was well past the marrying age and there seemed to be always tension these days between the two women who he loved most in the world. Drew was always pleased with Jenna’s sense of fortitude and progressive thinking. He was proud of her, but she needed to settle down. They had raised Jenna to be strong and independent just as her mother had been, but it had created her to be a bit willful, he supposed.
Drew thought about his beautiful daughter, Jenna. She was so much like Bronwyn. It was only natural that they would come to disagreements over things simply because they were so very much the same. Drew knew his daughter to be a bit impulsive at times, but she had a kind heart and a generous spirit. His own wife Bronwyn had come from a long line of proud Scots. One of the things he loved most about Bronwyn was her courage and strength. Naturally, their only daughter followed in Bronwyn’s footsteps.
Reading his thoughts, Bronwyn said, “It shall keep until tomorrow, my love. Take yer’ rest now. Morning will greet us soon enough.”
“Aye, my beloved. I am not so young a man anymore and my bones are starting to feel my age,” he said with a grin, knowing it was only at best half true.
“Nonsense, love! Ye’ are as hale and virile a man as the day I married ye’. Why, yer’ lovin’ proved just that. Sleep now, my Andrew. Nothing can be done at this late hour. We shall need to be fresh to start the preparations and there is no sense in worrying about that which we canna’ change now.”
Stealing a kiss, Drew said, “Yer’ a fine one to talk, lassie. I can hear the worries in
yer’ head as yer’ false words have left yer’ delicious lips.”
Bronwyn giggled. She loved it when Drew spoke with the accent of her people. He had been more clan than English for such a long time, she nearly forgot his roots after all. Alas! English he was and it was those ties that warranted the royal visit. May God preserve them all and make it pass without incident or ordeal.
~~~~~
Jenna pulled her cloak about her. It was already turning cold in the Highlands even though the harvest had not yet been completed. A pang of remorse assailed Jenna as she thought of the hands needed for harvest and now she would be absent for it this year. She steeled herself against the guilt that threatened her resolve. Aye, she was English and there was no one she loved more than her father, but she was a Highlander as her mother was before her. Jenna knew that in the end, her mother would understand. She tucked the hastily penned note between the crevice of her parents’ chamber door and the wall and she willed herself to make haste as she fought to move silently down the stone winding steps. She had packed just enough to sustain her for her adventure.
It wasn’t really much of an adventure. Jenna knew that the Royal messenger had brought a request that would ultimately see her wed and if Jenna could stall it, perhaps she could even thwart it entirely.
Jenna carefully made her way to the stables and she pulled a carrot from her basket to offer it to her mare in an attempt to keep the animal from whickering. The groom was still asleep and would not start his duties for at least another hour or so. The sun had not yet begun to rise and Jenna thought if she could lead her dark mare out of the stall quietly, she would be able to sneak past the guards. She had done it a time or two when she was younger and though it had earned her a paddling, the thrill of freedom was not tempered by her punishment. Well, she sighed, I am no’ that child now. I am a woman grown and t’is time I made my own destiny.