“Whoa,” Stephanie said shocked then slowly grinned. “You’re so bad,” she said pulling out her phone to call Carroll. “But you are also a genius.”
“Now, it’s going to get good,” Angela grinned as Bruce grabbed another bottle.
Looking around, Bruce spotted Sandy sitting alone and drinking a glass of wine. “Oh, hell no,” he said jumping up. Walking over to several tables by the back door that was serving as the bar, Bruce grabbed a large glass and then several bottles, making a mixed drink. When he was done, Bruce walked over to Sandy, taking the glass of wine.
“Here, this is a kamikaze,” he said handing Sandy the big glass.
Slowly taking the glass, “I really don’t like drinking, Bruce,” she said sniffing the glass.
“Don’t be scared, you have big balls,” he chuckled as she took a sip and raised her eyebrows impressed.
Nodding, “That’s pretty good,” she said smacking her lips. “As you should know, I’m female and have a vagina.”
Grinning, as Sandy took another drink, “You’ll understand,” Bruce said seeing Sandy drain half the glass. “Get Stephanie and Angela to make you another when you’re ready.”
Sandy nodded as she wiped her mouth and Bruce walked back to his chair. Reaching his chair Bruce heard music, and looked over to see Jake holding his monster ghetto blaster. “Now, it’s a party,” he said sitting down.
He looked over at Angela and Stephanie to see Sandy standing in front of them, holding an empty glass. They both smiled at her and got up pulling Sandy to the ‘bar’. As they made her another, Sandy watched their every move.
“That’s one fine woman,” Gene slurred, throwing his arm over Bruce’s shoulder.
Glancing at Gene and seeing him looking over at the bar, “Those are mine,” Bruce chuckled pouring a glass.
“Hell, boy, I know that and already told ya,” Gene said waving his hand around as Bruce lifted his glass. “I’m talking about Sandy.”
Coughing as vodka went down his lungs, Bruce jumped up trying to breathe, getting several ‘boos’ from the mass of bodies. Holding out his arm, Bruce gave the group a one finger salute, then turned back to Gene. “Sandy?” he asked making a face.
Gene smiled as he lifted his glass, looking over at the bar with eyes filled with unbridled lust. “Man, just look at her. Full tight body with a nice rack, full trunk, and those black glasses just do something for me,” Gene said as his head wobbled on his shoulders.
Thinking he was missing something, Bruce turned to look. Sandy wasn’t fat just thick and did have a large top, but he just couldn’t understand. “That Sandy? The one beside Angela and Stephanie?” Bruce asked for clarification as he pointed.
Chuckling, “Shit, what other one am I going to talk about?” Gene said, draining his glass and grabbing the bottle beside Bruce’s chair.
Still wearing the confused face, Bruce turned back to Gene then slowly started to grin, “Man, you’re just fucking with me, aren’t you?” Bruce said with a chuckle.
Setting the bottle down and raising his glass, “Fuck no. That woman’s so fine, I’ll drink her bathwater,” Gene said, taking a drink and never looking away from Sandy. The grin fell off Bruce’s face and he looked over at Sandy, but didn’t see what Gene was talking about. In fact, Sandy was attractive but Bruce’s eyes were closed to other women unless they were a total knock out, and then it was just a glance. He had two wives, be damned if he wanted to even think of another woman. Truth be told, he didn’t want them, but Debbie had known if Bruce was alone in this new world he would pursue the wave. Being as smart as she was and knowing Bruce, Debbie didn’t want to put that burden on one woman. Bruce would drive her insane.
“Shit,” Bruce said in a low voice, looking back at Gene who was looking at Sandy like she was on the menu. “Dude, go talk to the bitch then,” he said waving his arm at Sandy.
“I tried,” Gene said grabbing the bottle filling his glass. “I don’t know what the fuck she’s saying. I know it’s English, but it might as well be Chinese because all I understand are the conjunctions.”
“Motherfucker, you don’t speak Filipino but you sure shanked that hot one the captain was after,” Bruce snapped pulling out his phone. “You didn’t know what that bitch was saying, but that didn’t stop you from getting her to team up with you for that wood run,” Bruce said tapping on his phone.
Looking up as Bruce tapped on his phone, Gene shook his head. “Sandy speaks fucking English and I don’t know what the fuck she’s saying. She talks about protein receptor sites like I talk about guns. I’m not even going to talk about molecular density of membranes related to molecular permeability. Shit, I’m still looking that one up,” Gene said then drained his glass as Bruce looked over at the bar.
Feeling her pocket vibrate, Stephanie pulled her phone out and looked at it, then up at Bruce with her mouth hanging open. Stephanie elbowed Angela and held out her phone. Angela read it and stumbled into the table. Stephanie looked down at her phone tapping.
Feeling his phone vibrate, Bruce looked at the message, ’ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING?!’
Shaking his head, he typed, ‘No, but is Sandy pretty?’
Looking up, Bruce saw Angela take Stephanie’s phone, tapping away, and he looked down waiting on the message. ‘Yes, Sandy is cute but her body is what people talk about, but you can’t understand a fucking thing she says’, he read when the message came over.
Draining his glass as he typed with his thumb, Bruce looked over at them as he sent the message, ‘I know that, but Gene says she’s hot and he wants to drink her bathwater. That’s damn near a marriage proposal.’
The duo read the message as Stephanie handed Sandy her drink, then they fought over the phone with Stephanie pulling it out of Angela’s hand and started typing. ‘Tell him to try harder,’ she sent and Angela started arguing with her quietly as Sandy drained her glass, then held it out for a refill.
Nodding, Bruce put his phone back in his pocket, “Brother, she’s tossing down a few,” Bruce said, looking on the other side of the pool and seeing a group dancing. “Go ask her to dance.”
“Motherfucker, I can’t dance, you know that,” Gene snapped as Bruce sat back down.
“Bitch, it’s a party. Nobody can dance now,” Bruce said filling his glass and Gene nodded as they heard a yell and looked over seeing two troops wrestling.
“Oh yeah!” Buffy cheered and climbed up on the bench, using Ted’s shoulder so she could watch the two wrestle. Her hip was stiff, but it didn’t hurt now. “Yeah, he’s going to choke him out!” she cheered holding up her arms.
Melanie, Ted’s girlfriend, shook her head at the two wrestling, “Why do Rangers have to do that?” she said with a frown.
Lifting his mug, “The one getting choked out is Lenny. He said he’s never been choked out and Jerry is showing him what it’s like,” Carl explained. “This is the big boy club, so little boys need not apply.”
“Hey, bitch,” Buffy snapped, turning away from the match and narrowing her eyes at Carl.
Carl set his mug down and held up his hands, “Buffy, your balls drag on the ground and you have to tuck your dick into your boot. You are in the big boy club.”
Blinking her glassy eyes as her expression softened, “Oh, okay then,” she said turning back to the match to see Lenny go limp. “Danny’s choked me out, but I’m not big enough yet to choke someone out before they throw me off. If I fight, I have to use my knife. Herman doesn’t mind, but I want to just choke someone out,” she huffed sitting down as Ted and Carl gave a shiver, but looked at each other and nodded.
Bruce watched the winner of the match stand up as he turned to Gene, “I remember when that was us,” he said.
“Bitch, just because I said I’ve never been choked out, didn’t mean I wanted to experience it,” Gene chuckled as he looked over at the people dancing. “Mike can dance,” he said watching, “but Nancy dances like I do.”
“We danced with the kids,” Bruce
said filling his glass, then leaned over topping off Gene’s.
Taking a drink, Gene looked over at the bar to see Stephanie and Angela leading Sandy over. “Oh, shit! They’re bringing her over here,” Gene huffed sitting up straighter.
“Hey jackass, are we in grade school? Want to pass her a note and see if she’ll meet on the playground and get on the swing set with you?” Bruce snapped. “We are the baddest motherfuckers on the planet! Now act like it or I swear to God, I’ll choke you out and put a dress on you again.”
With his face getting hard, Gene cut his eyes at Bruce, “Asswipe, I can’t believe Debbie took pictures and had them blown up.”
Draining his glass, Bruce looked at Gene with a grin. “She just took the pictures. I’m the one that had them blown up to poster size,” Bruce said as the girls walked over.
“Hey guys,” Angela said smiling.
“Mmm,” Bruce said raising his eyebrows. “Looking good,” he said looking Angela and Stephanie up and down. “The kids better not be upstairs tonight, or Tarzan and Jane will have to share their tree.”
Stephanie dropped in his lap, “I’m going along with the bet, but I want timeouts,” she said then kissed him.
Angela grabbed a chair setting it in front of Gene and pushed Sandy down in it and joined Stephanie in Bruce’s lap. “We had to get her a mug,” Angela said motioning toward Sandy with her head. “She was draining the glass faster than we could fill it.”
Bruce looked over and laughed, seeing Sandy holding a massive soda mug, “Now, that’s a drink!” he said kissing Angela. “Time outs were never agreed to.”
“Hey, that’s not fair,” Stephanie said hugging his neck. “I wasn’t consulted.”
“She’s being a sissy,” Angela giggled as Gene leaned over in his chair.
“Now that’s a big drink,” Gene told Sandy.
Blinking her eyes as her head wobbled on her shoulders and turning to look at Gene, “Stephanie said I was emptying the lesser container too expeditiously,” Sandy slurred then smiled at him. “But I have to say, this kamikaze is excellent.”
“Yep, that’s one of the good ones,” Gene smiled back holding his glass out and Sandy just looked at him blinking. With his smile turning into a grin, Gene leaned over further, tapping Sandy’s mug in a toast.
Sandy gave a wryly smile and drunkenly slapped her face, “My apologies,” she smiled lifting her mug.
As the two turned up their drinks, Millie came over with a platter. “Mike said this is for y’all,” she said laughing. “Jane just climbed up after Tarzan.” Everyone turned and sure enough, saw Susan up in the oak tree with Conner. The two were sitting on a large limb drinking.
Angela looked at Stephanie grinning, “It’s not even three o’clock, this is going to get good.”
“Fifteen hundred,” Stephanie corrected grinning. “Yes, I can’t wait till dark and see what happens.”
Setting the platter on the ice chest beside Bruce, “They’s all gonna be passed out,” Millie predicted.
Bruce looked up grinning, “Wanna bet on that?” he slurred as Gene stood up, raising his glass.
“If there isn’t still Rangers partying when the sun comes up, I’ll never drink again,” he said draining his glass.
Millie’s jaw dropped, “I hopes nobody gets hurt,” she said.
“If they do, it’s lesson learned,” Gene said sitting back down and refilling his glass.
“Until the next party,” Bruce amended, grinning and raising his glass.
Looking over at the bar, “I’m goin’ ta get some mo whiskey,” Millie said walking away.
Bruce looked down at the platter and saw full shot glasses, sliced lemons and a small bowl of salt. Pulling the cooler in front of him and setting down his glass, Bruce passed Gene and Sandy a shot glass and lemon. Picking up his, he looked at Sandy, “Sandy, like this,” he said licking the back of his hand putting a pinch of salt on it.
Licking the salt off, Bruce shot the tequila and sucked the lemon stomping his foot. Sandy turned to Gene and watched him do the same thing. Shrugging her shoulders, Sandy copied them.
Her eyes almost bulged from her head as she drained the shot and shoved the lemon in her mouth. Everyone cheered as she bit down on the lemon and Sandy smiled with the lemon in her mouth. Taking the lemon out of her mouth she wobbled in her chair, “I like the kamikaze better,” she slurred heavily.
Taking another shot, Bruce spit the lemon out, “Sandy, taking that shot like that just proves you got big balls,” he laughed, picking his glass back up as Gene took another shot.
Sandy just blinked at Bruce as her head wobbled trying to get her eyes to focus. Slowly, she stood up as Gene tilted his glass back. Grabbing her jogging pants and panties, Sandy pushed them down to her knees and pointed at her crotch, “I have a vagina,” she said swaying on her feet.
Gene coughed, dropping his glass and started choking as Sandy leaned over, looking at her crotch and then straightened, “Yep, it’s a vagina,” she smiled as Stephanie jumped up and stepped over, pulling Sandy’s clothes back up. Looking at Stephanie’s baby pooch, “She’s got a baby in there. That means she has a vagina,” Sandy said proudly as Stephanie pulled her pants up, adjusting them till they were straight.
More than a little shocked, Bruce looked at Angela who was snorting more than she was laughing, “Nobody told me this was going to be show and tell,” he said as Angela tried to breathe and Gene tried to get the vodka out of his lungs, coughing. Several people again around the area ‘booed’ as Bruce again held up a one finger salute.
“Damn, girl,” Gene coughed hoarsely. “You may have a vagina, but you got balls big enough to fill a bucket.”
Reaching for her pants to show Gene again, Stephanie grabbed Sandy’s hand. “It’s an expression that means you’re tough and people respect you and think you’re cool,” Stephanie told her.
Whipping her head around and staring at Stephanie, Sandy grinned, “I’m cool and people think I’m tough?” she asked as Stephanie grabbed Sandy to steady her so she wouldn’t fall.
“They said you had balls, didn’t they?” Stephanie grinned, looking at Sandy’s glassy eyes.
Wrapping her arms around Stephanie’s neck, “I’ve never been cool before,” she said and let her go.
Sandy looked at Bruce and he winked at her, “Giant hairy balls,” he said grinning as Sandy turned to Gene who was now much better and pouring another glass.
“Girl, you can throw your balls over your shoulder,” Gene said standing up.
As he was raising his glass, Sandy reached over grabbing his crotch. “You got big balls for real,” she grinned, swaying on her feet as Stephanie let her go and stumbled back in shock. Gene’s glass fell from his hand as he let out an ‘umph’ with the grab.
“Damn girl,” he said in awe.
Stumbling over without letting go, Sandy put her chest to his, “Let’s dance, but I’m going to hold these if you don’t mind,” she slurred and Angela slid out of Bruce’s lap onto the ground, laughing and snorting hard as she kicked the ground.
Gene wrapped his arm around Sandy and guided her backward around the pool where everyone was dancing. With his mouth hanging open, Bruce watched them go around the pool staying face to face and Sandy not letting go. “Damn,” Bruce mumbled.
Stephanie came over and tried to help Angela up, but she couldn’t quit laughing. “I’ve never seen her act like this. I mean, we drank a bottle of wine together once and she was still Sandy,” Stephanie said sitting down in Bruce’s lap. “Now, I don’t know who she is.”
“Someone with a handful of balls,” Angela shouted kicking the ground harder.
“Spank her,” Stephanie said looking at Bruce.
“Maybe for the payoff,” Bruce grinned and Stephanie blushed as Mike and Nancy came over staggering.
“Damn, look over there at Gene and Sandy. She’s holding his cluster,” Mike laughed, sitting down and Nancy dropped in his lap. They spotted the platter and gra
bbed a shot.
Shaking his head, “Dude, you missed it, Sandy showed everyone she has a vagina and wanted to hold Gene’s balls as they danced,” Bruce chuckled as Angela climbed up in his lap.
They both spit out their lemons, “Oh man, I would’ve liked to watch that,” Nancy slurred, wiping her face and leaving a streak of salt on her cheek. Seeing the salt, Mike licked her cheek before taking another shot as a man walked over to them.
He held up a glass in toast, “Hey, Bruce. Remember me?” he said taking a drink.
Nodding, “Jacob, Marty’s dad,” Bruce said taking a drink.
Sitting down in the chair Sandy had left, Jacob sighed, “I guess you’ve figured out that my son has a crush on your daughter.”
“Jacob, hate to break it to you, but when Marty first saw Buffy when we found him in the school, he was infatuated with her,” Bruce told him, nudging Stephanie and pointing at the bottle to refill his glass.
Emptying his glass, “Yeah, he told me,” Jacob said as Stephanie filled Bruce’s glass, then Jacob held out his. “Can I have some of that?”
Leaning over and filling his glass, “I take it, you came over to see if we approve?” Stephanie asked.
Shaking his head, “Nope,” Jacob said draining half his glass. “I want to make sure she’s not going to kill my son. I’ve heard about some of the stuff she’s done and had doubts, but I’ve seen grown men tremble when she pulls out that knife. Not to mention the fact, she will go into battle at the drop of a hat. I don’t think she knows the meaning of fear.”
“That’s my girl,” Bruce grinned taking a drink.
Nodding as he finished his drink, “That’s why I’m here,” Jacob said as Stephanie held the bottle up and he reached over so she could refill it. “Is he in any danger?” Jacob asked when his glass was full. Nancy fell out of Mike’s lap, biting her hand as a father asked if his son was safe from Bruce’s daughter.
Draining his glass, “If he’s inappropriate with her, Buffy will cut him,” Bruce said flatly. “Then, Marty will get strung up by the rest of the team,” Bruce said and Jacob breathed a sigh of relief.
Blue Plague: Hope: Book Seven Page 6