by Jack Cheng
ALEX: Hey Terra?
TERRA: Yeah?
ALEX: Why aren’t you in college? You’re nineteen. You’re supposed to be in college.
TERRA: You sound like my mom.
ALEX: I do?
TERRA: It’s a long story.
ALEX: We have time, Google Maps says it’s going to be another four hours before we get to LA. Did you drop out of school?
TERRA: I didn’t drop out. I just didn’t want to go in the first place.
ALEX: Why not? My hero went to college. He went to lots of colleges. First he went to the University of Chicago and got his bachelor’s and master’s and PhDs in astronomy and astrophysics and then he lectured at Harvard and then he became a professor at Cornell University in Ithaca, New York.
TERRA: Your hero didn’t have my mom and Howard.
ALEX: He had Rachel and Sam Sagan.
TERRA: And I bet they were nothing like my mom and Howard. When I was a little older than you—when I was thirteen—I realized that as soon as I was eighteen I was going to move out of the house. So when I turned eighteen, that’s what I did.
ALEX: But then why didn’t you go to college? You still could’ve gone.
TERRA: I could have, but I know people who got their degrees but then couldn’t find work when they graduated. I mean, most of the stuff they teach you there doesn’t prepare you for a real-world job, which is the whole point anyway, so why go hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt when you’re just competing against other people on an artificial standard or even worse, drinking and partying away four years of your life only to come out with a piece of paper that isn’t worth sh—
TERRA: Sorry, I just get really mad about it sometimes.
ALEX: It’s OK, I know all the swear words.
TERRA: Oh yeah?
ALEX: Yeah. One time in school, Justin Petersen who’s on the basketball team and his locker’s next to mine asked me, Do you even know any swear words? And I said, Of course I do, DUH! and then I told him all the swear words and I said sometimes Benji and I even combine them into sentences like, Bleep the bleep bleep who bleeped on my bleep bleep bleeping bleeper.
TERRA: I see.
ALEX: But Terra, why does the point of college have to be to get you a job?
TERRA: Why else would you go?
ALEX: Because you’re interested in knowledge.
TERRA: —
TERRA: You know what, I take back what I said. I think some people actually get a lot out of college, and you’re going to be one of them. I’m sure of it.
[phone chiming]
TERRA: Brandon again?
ALEX: It’s Steve. He says, Are you guys hungry? Do you need to stop and use the bathroom?
[phone chiming]
ALEX: He says, Let me know, smiley face.
TERRA: I could wait till we get to LA. What do you think?
ALEX: Can we go to Johnny Rockets when we get there?
TERRA: Sure.
[keys clicking]
[phone chiming]
ALEX: Steve says we should go to In-N-Out because it’s way better, hamburger French fry thumbs-up.
[keys clicking]
[phone chiming]
ALEX: I asked him do they have apple pie à la mode and he says they have milkshakes, cow ice-cream cone.
TERRA: The guys can go to In-N-Out if they want. I’ll take you to Johnny Rockets.
ALEX: OK!
TERRA: I’m low on gas though. Tell him we’re taking the next exit.
ALEX: OK.
[keys clicking]
[phone chiming]
[phone chiming]
NEW RECORDING 27
11M 52S
What an afternoon! And it’s still not even over yet.
Terra and I were driving and then the freeway got wider, like five lanes instead of two, and there were more cars and everyone was going faster. We didn’t listen to music and we didn’t talk and Terra said she liked the silence, and I said there’s not really silence, there’s the sound of the wind and the road and the air conditioner, and the sound of cars passing and me talking right now, and Terra said that’s very true. She said she likes the peacefulness, and I said I like it too, so we listened to the peacefulness and then I told her an astronomy joke.
I said, Why didn’t the Dog Star laugh at the comedy show?
Because it was too Sirius.
Terra laughed and I said, Did you get it? because some of the kids at school didn’t get it because they thought I was talking about satellite radio. Terra said she got it, it’s because Sirius is the name of a star that’s also called the Dog Star, but it sounds like serious too, as in a serious person, and I said, That’s why you’re my Terra, you really get me.
Terra laughed again and we listened to the peacefulness again, and then she said she has a sudden urge to go swimming. She asked me do I want to go swimming and I said, But what about LA? and she said we’ll only stop for an hour or two, it’d be nice to cool down in this heat. I said, That’s a great idea because your car’s air conditioner sure isn’t doing that right now. Terra said there’s a lake nearby that she’s been to before and I looked it up on Google Maps, then I texted Steve and he said, But we’ll be in LA in a couple of hours, how about we go swimming when we get there? I told him Terra wants to go swimming right now, and he said thumbs-up swimmer sun tidal wave.
We took the exit for the lake and then the road got really curvy all of a sudden, and Terra was driving SO fast. The speed limit was fifty-five miles per hour but on some of the turns you were only supposed to go twenty-five, and it was like Forza Motorsport which I watch Benji play at his house sometimes except Terra didn’t do any skids. We saw the lake down the side of the cliffs and trees but we didn’t see a way to get there, so we kept driving and then we saw signs that took us to the lake. At the entrance the park ranger lady said it was five dollars cash but Terra only had her credit card, so I let her borrow some money because she’s family.
We got out of our cars and there were a lot of families making barbecue at the picnic tables, and some kids were throwing a tennis ball back and forth in the water, and other people down the shore had kayaks and there were babies in the shallow part with their moms and dads. The beach isn’t a normal beach because there isn’t regular sand, the sand is really tiny rocks instead, and we took off our shoes and our socks and put them in our shoes so we wouldn’t get rock sand in them. Zed put his round pillow on the rock sand and he started meditating, and Steve started putting on sunscreen and he asked do me and Terra want any, and Terra said thanks and she helped me put sunscreen on my face and neck and shoulders. Steve asked Terra does she need any help putting on sunscreen and she said, Alex can help me, isn’t that right? And I said that’s right and I helped her.
We sat on the rock sand and watched the people already in the water, and the kids throwing the tennis ball were playing a game that looked like dodgeball. Except instead of throwing the ball through the air they’d try to skip it on the water a bunch of times first, it was waterdodgeball, and after a while Terra said, Let’s go for a dip. Steve said we probably shouldn’t because we don’t have towels or swimsuits and we’ll get our car seats all wet, but Terra started taking off her jean shorts anyway and went in the water in her tank top and underwear, it was a tank top bikini. Steve didn’t try to stop her or anything, he just watched her splash in. And then he said, Why is it always the ones like her? but he wasn’t talking to me, he was just talking out at the water. I asked him, What do you mean the ones like her? The ones like who? Like Terra? What ones like Terra? And then he said, Never mind, and I said, Hey, that’s the name of an album by Nirvana the band.
Terra was yelling from the water, Alex, come on! The water’s amazing! And I yelled back, What about getting your car seats wet! And then she yelled, Don’t be such a Steve! and I laughed bec
ause I was totally being a Steve. I said, Hey Steve, did you put on enough sunscreen because you’re already turning red, and then Terra yelled my name again and I said, Come on Steve, let’s go! but he said no. I guess he was still worried about getting his seats wet. I told him it’s his loss, and I took off my shirt and pants and I went in.
I couldn’t do a cannonball because it was too shallow so I just belly-flopped, and the water was SO cold. Terra laughed and said that when I jumped in I looked like a small whale, and I said, That reminds me, do you know where we can see some whales because I want to record some new whale songs for my Golden iPod. Terra said she doesn’t know, but we can look it up when we get to LA.
The water in the lake was really fresh and clear and dark blue-green. When I looked closely I could see tiny green dots floating in the water like the chia seed kombucha drinks Benji’s mom has in their refrigerator. Terra said it’s a kind of harmless algae, and I told her I’ve never seen algae in a lake like this, and she said, Isn’t it beautiful? and I said, Yes, it’s almost the color of your eyes.
We went out to where the water was a little deeper, and it was less rocky but I could barely touch the bottom on my tippy toes and there were some lakeweeds that were scratchy and they tickled my feet. Terra was floating on her back and the sun was shining off the water like diamonds, and I wished I brought my sunglasses but they’re at my house in Rockview. We went out past the kids who were playing waterdodgeball and it was even deeper and I couldn’t touch the bottom anymore, and Terra said to hold on to her so I did, and the water bounced up and down but there weren’t any big waves that you can go surfing on. I asked Terra, Have you ever been surfing because I’ve never been surfing, only skateboarding, and the one time I went skateboarding I fell off and scraped my knee so I’m not doing it again until I can afford the proper protection. Terra said she hasn’t been surfing either, but when we get to LA we’re totally going to rent some surfboards and learn by ourselves.
Terra loves the water. She said she doesn’t spend enough time in it. She said whenever she gets in a lake or an ocean, it feels like she’s returned to the earth. I said, That makes no sense because you never left the earth, and she said it’s just an expression, it’s more like when she’s in the water she feels like she’s in her most natural environment. I said, Oh, that makes a lot more sense, because we originally evolved from colonies of bacteria in the ocean hundreds of millions of years ago. I told her also our bodies are made mostly of water, so if you think about it, it’s like if you fill up a water balloon and put it in a bathtub full of water, then the only thing that keeps the inside water separate from the outside water is the skin of the balloon, and if the skin wasn’t there there’d really be no difference. Terra said that’s very deep, and I told her you can do it in a sink too, it doesn’t have to be as deep as a bathtub.
I think Steve saw all the fun me and Terra were having and got jealous because he finally came out in the water too. He took off his shirt but kept on his shorts, and he stepped in little by little and splashed some water on himself to get used to how cold it was. Terra and I went back to the shallower part by Steve where the water came up just to my neck, and Terra could stand on her knees, and if you didn’t know that Terra was standing on her knees and you saw us, it probably looked like we were the same height. Steve got down on his knees too, and when he finally came all the way into the water he looked so happy. I said, See Steve? We told you it was a good idea to come out. And Steve said he’s glad he did.
We swam over to the kids who were playing waterdodgeball and asked them, Can we play? and they said yes. Terra and I went to where the kids were on one side and Steve stayed with the rest of the kids on the other side, and we played waterdodgeball and it was so much fun. Those kids could throw the ball SO far and fast. I tried to throw it hard but it didn’t go as far and fast, but the other kids were really good at skipping it on the water, and the ball would curve and spin and go puu puu puu away from where you thought it was going. When it was Steve’s turn he threw the ball really REALLY hard to Terra, and it skipped on the water a bunch of times and hit her in the mouth! She put her hands over her mouth and she said Ow! and then she started going toward the shore. Everyone asked her, Are you OK? Especially Steve, and she said she’s OK, she’s just going to the bathroom. Steve got out too and he kept saying he’s sorry, he didn’t mean to, and Terra said it’s OK, it was an accident. Steve looked really disappointed afterwards and I said, Hey Steve, don’t be so down on yourself, it was an accident! I told him to come back in the water, we’re still not done with our game yet, but Steve said he doesn’t feel like it anymore. He said he’s going to call his girlfriend, and I should go back over by Zed because I shouldn’t be in the water if nobody’s watching me, so I said good-bye to the kids and I told them it was fun playing with them.
I watched Steve walk along the shore and I let the sun dry the water on me, and pretty soon I was dry except for my hair and underwear. And I was waiting for Terra to come back from the bathroom so I thought it might be a good time to learn how to meditate. I said, Hey Zed, I don’t mean to interrupt but can you teach me how to meditate because I want to learn how to do it right. He said sure, he can teach me, so I sat down and I put my hands in my lap like I was pretend-holding a cheeseburger the way Zed was doing, and I squinted my eyes and told him, OK, I’m ready.
Zed said that I should focus on my breathing, and let all my thoughts go out of my head as the breath goes out of my lungs, and I said that’s physically impossible because our brains are always thinking something. Zed said to look for the gap between the thoughts and I tried and I couldn’t find it, because as soon as I’m done with one thought I have another, like how when Zed said the word gap I thought of the gap between Ken Russell’s teeth, and as soon as I stopped thinking about that I thought about how we came all the way here from SHARF and now I have a Terra to help me make my recordings, and then I thought about my wet hair and underwear and then about Carl Sagan, and then I wanted to call animal control again.
Zed said that’s great, just notice yourself thinking, and look for that moment when nothing seems to exist, not even time. I said, Oh, you mean like in a black hole, because in a black hole the gravity is so strong that it bends light and time and space. Zed said that’s a great metaphor, and I said, Thanks, feel free to use it in your next book.
So then I closed my eyes and I tried to imagine myself in a black hole, and after a while I started seeing colors. First I saw the red color that you see when you look at the sun with your eyes closed, but then I saw pinks and blues and they were in blobby shapes and it was almost like in Contact when Dr. Arroway looks out the transporter window and sees the swirling galaxy and she says, So . . . beautiful . . . no . . . words . . . they should’ve sent . . . a poet.
I think I fell asleep even, but I’m not sure, and when I opened my eyes I saw the beach, except it wasn’t the cosmic beach like in Contact and there wasn’t a super-intelligent being speaking to me through a form that looked and sounded like my dad. There was just the rock sand beach of this lake in California and there was Zed who was meditating next to me, and he’s still here right now, and Terra’s still not back yet from the bathroom and Steve’s not back yet from his walk.
I wonder if Ronnie’s ever been swimming in this lake. I bet when we get to LA in a couple of hours we’ll go to his place and he’ll open the door, and I’ll say, SURPRISE! and he’ll say, What are you doing here! and I’ll run at him and hug him and he’ll hug me back and he’ll say, Why is your hair wet? and I’ll say, I went swimming in a lake, and then he’ll notice someone behind me and he’ll say, Who’s this? and I’ll tell him she’s our Terra and she lives in Las Vegas and Look, she has eyes just like yours.
I can’t wait to see Ronnie’s face when I tell him that.
NEW RECORDING 28
12M 34S
Guess where we are, guys . . .
We’re in LA!
We’re at Johnny Rockets!
It’s just me and Terra here though. Steve went to have dinner with his girlfriend, and Zed’s back at the apartment, and I finally met their other roommate Nathan! Nathan’s really tall and skinny. He was sitting under some palm trees in their courtyard and drinking an iced coffee when we got there, and when him and Zed stood next to each other they looked like C-3PO and R2-D2, except Nathan has blond hair down to his chin and not as good posture and he wears glasses and his skin isn’t gold. I guess he’s not really like C-3PO.
The guys’s apartment is way nicer than Terra’s apartment, by the way. It’s even nicer than Paul Chung’s! It’s on the third floor and the outside hallway looks over the courtyard, and their living room has big windows at the end that take up the whole wall, it’s a sightseer living room. When we walked in I saw a bunch of empty boxes in the corner and padded envelopes and big rolls of bubble tape, which I popped. There were also twenty sealed boxes of Battlemorphs booster packs—I’ve never seen so many Battlemorph cards in my whole life!
I said, Hey Steve, you must love Battlemorphs even more than Benji does, and Steve said it’s another one of his side adventures. He showed me how he opens the boxes and takes out all the packs, and then he weighs them one by one on a scale like the one Benji’s mom has in their kitchen. Steve said he can tell without opening them which packs have holograms because the packs with holograms weigh a little more than the ones without holograms. He said he opens the hologram packs and sells the hologram cards by themselves, especially the ultra-rares, and then he keeps the not-hologram packs sealed and sells those too because people don’t want to buy packs that are already open. See, guys? I told you Steve was entrepreneurial.
I wanted to e-mail Benji and tell him about Steve’s side adventure but I wanted to go surprise Ronnie too, so I told Terra let’s go to Ronnie’s place ASAP. Steve said he’s leaving also, he’s having dinner with his girlfriend and he’ll probably just sleep over at her place tonight, so if Terra and me want we can stay in his room. Terra said thanks for the offer but we should go talk to Ronnie first, then we can figure it out.