And So She Waited

by Shakuita Johnson

  "You think you're so cute, dontcha, Remy Peters?" Casey Summers scolded.

  Casey was a gorgeous little blonde with bright blue-green eyes. She was petite and extremely laid back. She knew what the score was and didn't mind Remy being himself. She also didn't try to make him do any more than he wanted to. She never asked him to commit, and didn't hound him. Just the way he liked it.

  His laughing ended when he heard his phone chirp from the nightstand. That sobered him right up. Raven. It couldn’t have been anyone but her. It had always been her, for the last year and a half now. He sighed and snatched the phone. He didn't know what her deal was. They just hung out from time to time. Nothing more. At least he hadn't led her to believe that there was anything more than when he had time to stop by.

  Morning babe. Have a great day! XOXO Miss you…

  "Let me guess. It's Raven,” Casey said. “Why don't you just tell her the truth?"

  "There’s nothing to tell. She's not my girlfriend," Remy said.

  "It's been a year and a half. Either just be with her or let her go. Stop jerking her chain."

  "Oh, you're concerned now? Doesn't stop you from coming over, so mind your own business."

  "Whatever, I'm going to shower. Asshole."

  Remy didn't need a damn lecture. He hadn't made any commitments. He was a free bird.

  Ding.

  He picked up the phone again to read the message.

  Hey babe…you awake yet?

  Well, if he hadn't texted her back the first time, what the hell did she think? He placed the phone back on the dresser and decided to catch a shower with Casey. The phone started ringing on his way in but he ignored it. It was just Raven, and he didn't feel like talking right now. He had other plans and they involved Casey, naked.

  Remy emerged from the bathroom fully dressed, in a comfortable pair of faded blue jeans and a cool graphic tee. Casey had rushed out of his apartment with the promise to call later, but it didn't matter if she did or didn’t. That was the great thing about no expectations and no commitments.

  Remy picked up his phone and noticed a voicemail from Raven. He would see her at school no doubt, so he didn’t bother calling or texting back. He was sure she would be sending another message shortly anyway. If he didn't have the occasional feelings for her, he would have ended it months ago. She was getting way too clingy. He honestly didn't know why he hadn't stopped talking to her yet.

  He checked his watch and realized he had lingered too long. Damn. Late again. He was glad that he had no classes with Raven this year. He liked to keep their contact to weekends, preferably when no one knew. There was no way he’d ever take her out during the day, let alone at night. Sometimes she’d approach him when he was with his friends, and that would really set him off. He wasn't ashamed of her but he didn't want people thinking they were serious. Nor did he want to be leashed and collared. He was a free bird, and Raven was too clingy. She hadn’t started off that way, but she definitely was now.

  "I've got to stop this before it blows way out of control," Remy said out loud.

  Problem was, he had no idea how to get out of the mess it took him a year and a half to get into. He would have to ask his buddies what they thought he should do.

  As Remy locked his apartment door and headed to his car, his phone went off again.

  Ding.

  Please call me. I'm starting to worry. You never came over last night, plus we need to talk.

  Remy grimaced. What had he gotten himself into with this girl? It never got to this point with anyone else. Did she not know how to keep things causal and fun? He did not want a girlfriend, ever. He'd never had one and he didn't plan on having one any time soon. He was only a sophomore in college, for god’s sake. He had years ahead of him before he was ready to settle down with one girl. Only until grad school would he even consider getting serious with someone. The two of them were just going to have to sit down and have a long talk. She would either get on board or find someone else to obsess over. It could not be him.

  Remy’s brand new, midnight blue Audi waited patiently for him to climb in. He drove the thirty-five minutes or so from his place to school thinking about what he was going to say to Raven. He had to get this over with quickly and maybe then she would stop texting him hundreds of times a day on top of all the damn calling. He was tempted to change his number but then he would have to reprogram and text everyone else about the change. No. What he had to do was man up and tell Raven what the deal was; what it had been all along. She had two choices: abide by his rules, or find someone else to spend her time with. There were no other options available.

  Once Remy had arrived, he hopped out of the car and locked it up. As he walked towards class, he heard his name being called up ahead. It was that new Photography student, what was her name? Oh yeah… Stacey Nickels. She was sexy, with a capital S. He had been wooing her for a few weeks now and was getting close to sampling her. She had long brown hair with black streaks that fell down to her waist, and chocolate brown eyes that made her look innocent. And those lips! God, they were the lushest pink lips he had ever seen. She was just too damn cute. She smiled when they grew closer.

  "So you decide on letting me take you out yet?" Remy asked.

  Stacey tossed her hair behind her shoulder with a flip of her hand before she answered him.

  "I've heard you're nothing but trouble," she said with a twinkle in her eye and smile on her lips.

  "Only the good kind, baby, only the good kind."

  "If you're lucky, I might let you take me out this weekend."

  "I'm always lucky. Pick you up at eight, Friday night. Text me your address."

  "‘Kay."

  "Awesome. See you around pretty girl."

  Remy watched Stacey as she walked to her class. He couldn't wait until Friday night.

  Ding.

  Dammit, it was Raven again. He really needed to talk to her before the day was over. He checked his phone to see what she wanted this time.

  Meet me for lunch. I'll buy.

  Perfect, he could talk to her then.

  How about the Starbucks next to campus…noon?

  That's perfect! See you later babe. Love you <3

  What the fuck? Love? Is she insane? Remy really needed to have a talk with her. She couldn't be falling in love with him. He wasn't anywhere near having those feelings for her. This situation was a mess and now he had to stop it before it got worse. If he wasn't careful she would have the "Where is our relationship going" talk with him. He had to nip this shit in the bud. This shit was going to be fixed, once and for all.

  He was such a damn idiot. Raven had somehow gotten under his skin and stayed there. She was like a damn tick, slowly poisoning him. He was not spending the rest of his life with Raven Sinclair; he had too much living left to do. And, he was not ready to be a family man, with a wife and two-point-five kids. He didn't want a white picket fence and huge backyard; he liked playing the field and answering to no one. Maybe if he had met her later in life it wouldn't be a big deal, but he was only 20 and wasn't ready for whatever she was thinking.

  For once he was going to take Casey’s advice and stop this ridiculousness. He had to end it all together, no options. It was the only way now. She had dropped the “L” word and he was no longer comfortable maintaining any kind of relationship with her. Once girls thought they were in love, they did crazy, unexplainable shit. He would not be trapped into a situation he couldn't get out of. This was just what he needed! The weekend had been so great, and now his week was already going to shit. Fuck Mondays!

  Chapter 3

  Matthew fixed his eyes on the front door of the dance studio and waited for Raven to walk through. He needed to talk to her and she was going to listen. Last night he had seen Remy flirting all night with Casey Summers. They had laughed for hours before finally walking out of the bar together. He had wanted to go over and say something but his friends wouldn't let him. He hated Remy, the stupid prick. Raven had been falling
all over herself for him for a year and a half. Matt was tired of watching it. Tired of all the things he'd seen that asshole Remy Peters do to her.

  Raven could do so much better. She could be with him, but he didn’t want to push himself on her too hard. She was the skittish type.

  As Matt waited for Raven to show, he used the barre to warm up with a plié. Should he be using the barre at his age? Definitely not, but he was too distracted. Later, when he wasn’t so damned out of it, he would practice his pirouettes. As he pivoted his body in the familiar rhythms of ballet, Raven walked in looking bright and chipper. He almost hated to burst her bubble. Almost.

  "Raven, what took you so long? And why didn't you answer my last text?" Matt demanded with a frown.

  "Oh my god, Matty!” she huffed. “Get over yourself. I don't belong to you. I don't have to broadcast my every move to you. As far as those ridiculous accusations in your text messages this morning, I don't want to hear a single word."

  Matthew couldn’t explain what happened next. It felt like a fireball was stuck in his throat and he couldn’t keep it in any longer. He had reached his limit with this shit.

  "What the fuck is wrong with you?" he exploded. "Are you so starved for love and affection that you would pretend that you're in this fairytale relationship with Remy fucking Peters?"

  Matt's chest was heaving. This shit had gone on long enough. Her denial couldn’t be that strong? Hell, he was starting to question why he cared so much for her in the first place. How much sacrifice could one person make for another? He watched as Raven's face morphed from outrage, to hurt. He had never spoken that way to her before, but she had forced it out of him.

  "What, you don't have anything to say? No eloquent musings of how your love was written in the damn stars or some such bullshit that you comfort yourself with? All the while he's fucking someone else when he's not fucking you?"

  If she didn't want to speak, he had enough to say for the both of them. Watching her fawn over Remy Peters pissed him off like nothing before in his life. Matt had known Raven since they were five. They had been in the same beginner's tumbling and ballet classes, and had been inseparable until freshman year of college. He wished she'd never laid eyes on Remy Peters. Matt had instantly hated him with his cocky grin and I'm-the-best-thing-ever attitude. Driving around in his fancy car, with girls hanging all around him like he was too cool for school. Matt had immediately wanted to punch him in the face and he'd never punched anyone in his life.

  Raven needed to wake up and if Matt had to slap her a few times to ensure she did, he would do just that. The kid gloves were coming off. He had a future to protect, their future, and Remy Peters wasn’t in it. It was go-time. It was time she knew that he was the best thing for her. The person who loved her more than anyone else could.

  "What's wrong with you?" Raven whispered.

  "You! You're what's wrong with me! Can't you see what you mean to me? It's me you should be with. It's me who loves you. Remy loves no one but himself. He was all over Casey Summers last night and they went home together. Plus, everyone knows he's been trying to take the new Photography major transfer student home. What's her name, Stacey Nickels? It seems everyone but you sees Remy for what he truly is! A grade-A fucking asshole!"

  "You're just jealous. You don't want me to be happy,” Raven sobbed. “You’ve had it out for Remy since the first time I introduced you. How can you call yourself my best friend? It's like I don't even know you anymore."

  "Jealous! Jealous! I can’t— You think— What in the hell's happened to you? Are you really that naïve and gullible? Do you really think that you and Remy are going to get married and live happily-ever-after? It's been a year and a half, Raven. How many times has he taken you out where people could see you together? How many of his friends have you met? His parents? I'll tell you how many: none. Zero. He doesn't care about you. He got exactly what he wanted from you. SEX! That's all you ever were to him and all you will ever be. Honestly, I'm not sure why he hasn't dumped you yet!"

  "He loves me, that's why,” Raven said under her breath. “He's going to meet me for lunch and we are going to discuss where our relationship is going." Her eyes were now brimming with unshed tears. "I told him I loved him."

  "And did he say it back? No. He barely responds to your texts and you think after dropping the ‘L’ word that things will magically turn around? He's going to stop seeing other girls? Raven, sweetie, please wake up and see what's right in front of you. I don't want to see you hurt any more than you already are," Matt pleaded.

  Raven let out a wicked laugh. "Oh, you don't want to see me hurt but you have no problem causing me pain? Fuck you, Matt. I don't need this from you. Remy loves me and if you won't support my relationship, then there's nothing left for us to say to each other."

  Matt’s body temperature dropped at those words. She would choose Remy over him? Well, fuck her too.

  "You wouldn't dare choose him over me. We've been friends for almost 15 years. Surely you're not going to let that poor excuse for a man get between us?"

  "You don't have to agree with whom I choose to spend my time with but I won't be lectured like a child. You are not my father and I’m tired of you acting like you are. Either get over your hang-ups about Remy or we have nothing else to discuss, ever. Think about it. I have to get some practice in before my lunch with Remy." With those parting words, Raven stalked off to practice in the adjoining studio.

  You have got to be kidding me, Matthew thought to himself. He was utterly bewildered. He was moving extremely close to devastated. She would cut him out for some guy she barely knew. A guy who didn't even want to be seen publicly with her. The same guy who got mad every time she tried to invite herself to an outing where his friends would be. Matt was baffled that she would so carelessly toss aside their friendship because he was trying to keep her from making a fool of herself for someone who couldn't care less about her. What the hell was going on in the world when friends couldn't be honest with friends? He shouldn't be surprised; the messenger always took the blame for bad news. But, had he not told her what he knew, she would still have been angry with him. He couldn't win for losing. Damned if you do and damned if you don’t.

  He didn’t know what else to do. She’d have to physically see Remy screwing around with another girl to believe it. And even then, he wasn't so sure she would believe her own eyes. She would probably make up more excuses, or worse, blame herself. Matt wouldn't be able to stomach it if she excused Remy’s indiscretions with self-blame. So what was he going to do? Maybe he could talk to Remy himself and get him to back off, to leave Raven alone if he wasn't going to commit. If Remy couldn't love her the way she deserved to be love, then he needed to step off center stage.

  Matt couldn't focus on practice anymore. He needed to find Remy and get this conversation out of the way. He looked up at the clock and figured Remy would be at the pool doing a few laps. He grabbed his things and headed out to find the bastard. They had a lot of shit to discuss before Remy met Raven for lunch. Matt was going to make sure Remy did the right thing this time. And that was to let Raven go.

  Remy was in the pool as Matt suspected, but Casey and Stacey were there as well. Disgusting. Matt would never understand how some girls slept with a guy they knew was sleeping with other girls. Whatever. It was not his problem today. Raven was his problem and the reason why he was here. He needed to make this quick. Matt walked right up to the side of the pool and made no bones about what he wanted to say.

  "Remy, we need to talk. Now. This thing with you and Raven has gone on long enough. It's time for you to stop pulling her chain.”

  "How is that any of your business, Matthew?" Casey asked.

  "Shut up, skank. I wasn't addressing you."

  "Excuse me? You don't even know me!"

  "I know you've been fucking Remy, even though you know he’s been fucking Raven and actively trying to get into Stacey's pants," Matt said disapprovingly.

  "This has nothin
g to do with me,” Stacey said. “I just enjoy taking pictures for the school paper. We aren't sleeping together."

  "Yet, I saw you twirling your hair and accepting dinner invitations for Friday night earlier on campus,” Matt sneered. “Stop trying to play me for a fool. You are both disgusting rats.”

  “That’s no way to talk to a lady,” Remy said with a snicker.

  “Get out of the pool Remy. We need to talk. Privately."

  "Fuck you, Matt!" Stacey and Casey yelled at the same time.

  "Not even with Remy's dick,” Matt shot back. “You going to speak for yourself, Remy? Or are you going to let your lap dogs do all your talking for you?"

  Remy wasn't making any attempts to get out of the pool, nor did he look ashamed that Matt knew exactly what he was doing with both those girls.

  "I don't want any problems, Matt. I just want to practice my strokes," Remy said.

  "No problem. It will only take a minute, maybe two."

  "Fine, I'll meet you in the locker room in five."

  "You're not seriously going to entertain this idiot?" Casey screeched. "After the way he talked to Stacey and me."

  "Let it go, Cass, I'll handle it."

  "Yeah, let it go, Cass. He's handling it," Matt mocked. "I'll be in the locker room. Hurry up so we can get this over with. I wouldn’t want to catch anything by breathing the same air as your groupies."

  Matt stormed into the locker room with the piercing screeches of two angry bitches trailing him. Fuck them and fuck Mondays!

  Chapter 4

  Remy was running late. Where the hell was he? She had been waiting for ten minutes and there was still no sign of him. She had already left him three messages.

  He wasn't standing her up, was he?

  Raven inhaled a deep breath and slowly let it out. She would not panic. He was just running a bit behind. Raven looked at the entrance for what felt like the hundredth time when she spotted him.