“Likewise.” He leans in to kiss me, the first time since we’ve returned to Thera. His cinnamon-tinged lips hit mine, and then he parts and teases my lips with his tongue. He alternates between gentle exploration of my mouth and nibbling on my bottom lip. For a sizable moment, I allow, respond, and even enjoy this sweet, passionate gesture, my heart pounding and desire for him building until I remember—Ethan loves someone else. And, Blake is alive and fighting for his life. The guilt pummels me. I have feelings for Ethan. No question. He’s gorgeous, fun, a great listener, an even better smooth talker, a fabulous cook, my best friend at the moment, and I feel comfortable with him. He’s the only reason I’m getting through this. But, we’re no longer faking this to support our cover. This is all too real and feels wrong. I can’t and won’t be “the other woman.”
I pull away. “I’m so sorry. We need to stop. This isn’t right. Not now. You’re in love with someone else. And, there’s Blake. I forget all that sometimes…being here with you and not having them around. But, I’m just not one of those kinds of girls. Just look at what Briella and Tristan did to me. I don’t want to ever be like that…ever.” My loyal tendencies are a good trait, right?
He closes his eyes, unable to look me in mine. “I understand, and I shouldn’t have done it. Forgive me? I just got caught up in the moment…beautiful girl I care for in my arms. But I’d never want to disrespect what you have with Blake. I’m not that guy either. I promise. We just seem to have bad timing,” He rolls off the side of the bed and then comes around and sits on the edge, facing away from me, head in his hands.
“It’s okay, and, of course, there’s nothing to apologize for.” I rub his back. It’s hardly his fault. I put my hand up his shirt and told him how incredibly appealing he is. What guy wouldn’t act on that?
“I hope we can be friends,” he says, though I’m not entirely sure he means it. He looks depressed, but I don’t see why he would be since he has still got his dream girl in the wings. I couldn’t stand to be his “fill-in” girl anyway.
“You are already my friend, Ethan. The best friend I could ask for.” I pause for a moment to wonder if it’s really possible for a girl and a guy to be just friends. Sure we can. How could we not after what we’ve been through together? “How about I go trash your butt in charades? Because you really, really suck at having to keep your mouth shut.”
“I’m a lawyer-in-training,” he says with a chuckle, although I can tell he’s still upset. “What’d you expect?”
Three weeks after returning to Thera
I’m so excited to see the familiar sights of my canyon that I loosely hug a giant cactus and kiss the dirt. Never mind the fact I almost died in it. And I discovered the truth about the Second Chancers here. Blake and I spent a lot of time amongst these Theranberry bushes and cacti, and for that reason alone, I’ll always appreciate the place.
Ethan and I were released on a “probationary” basis. If we continue to toe the party line, we stay free. If we start spewing unflattering words about the Ten or SCI, we’ll be re-confined or Exiled. Jared had to stay behind to complete his training. I expect he’ll also be receiving a little extra therapy time too.
“Come on,” I say to Ethan who seems less enthused to deliver me back home than I am to be delivered. “Let’s go.” I grab his hand and drag him along the canyon path and up towards my house. He stops me at the ramp to my front door.
“Things are going to change now that we’re out. You and Blake will be together. I have my internship. And, soon, I’ll return to Earth for my last year of law school. I just wanted to tell you that I, uh, am glad to have gotten to know you better. That first night I met you I thought you were amazing and I was right. You are, well, incredible. I’m really going to miss you.” His hands are in his pockets and he is rocking back and forth on his feet—just like he did that first night.
“You can come see me anytime you like. And, if I’m allowed, I’ll come visit you. We’re going to stay friends, Ethan Darcton, despite the fact you were spawned from Satan. You don’t get to use law school or Blake or anything as a cop out. I’ll miss you just as much.” He smiles at the reference to his father.
“Promise?”
“I promise,” I tell him. “Now, can I go see if Blake’s home?”
“Sure, I’ll be going.” He motions towards the doors to the train. He looks so sad that it makes me want to cry.
“Uh, no you won’t. You’re coming with me. If Blake’s not home, you’ll handle my meltdown and help me track him down. If he is home, I still want you there. You guys should be friends too.”
“I don’t know about that. I don’t think he’s going to like me much now. After all, I did pretend to be your boyfriend.”
“Right, you pretended. On orders,” I say.
“What about all the kissing?” He bites the edge of his lip and looks at me through his long eyelashes. I feel a pang of longing at the memories, particularly of our last kiss. But I feel even more desire to see if Blake is home and well.
“What kissing?” I wink at him. “I don’t remember a thing, and, even if I did, I think you compared me to a post and suggested I need lessons.”
“Kira,” he says, cocking his head to the side. “You know…” I don’t let him finish, shushing him by placing two fingers over his mouth. Then I put my hands on his shoulders and push him up the ramp backwards until his back is against my front door. I pause, my body pushed against his, our eyes locked, knowing it will be the last moment we have for a while. I soak in the fabulous nature of his sapphire eyes, strong jaw, full lips, and stubble. Finally, not wanting the moment to get any more awkward than I’ve let it, I knock with one hand while keeping him trapped with the other. Trapped being an overstatement as he could easily overpower me, but he’s going along and laughing while he does.
It seems like an eternity before the door opens. Ethan has to catch his footing as the door gives way. To keep him from escaping, I shove him inside, shut the door behind me, and then jump into Blake’s arms. Blake feels a whole lot skinnier than he did the last time I saw him, if that’s even possible.
“Whoa, whoa, Kira.” Blake sets me down gently. “I guess no one told you about my skin grafts? Ow!”
“Skin grafts? No one told me squat. Last I heard, you were ‘barely hanging on.’ I didn’t even know if you’d be here when I knocked on the door.”
“Well…” He looks at Ethan. “It looks like we have a lot of catching up to do.”
“Blake, I think you’ve met Ethan Darcton. After the flash flood, I kind of flipped out. So, the Ten allowed Ethan to escort me back to Earth for a vacation of sorts. He has been a good friend.”
“Friend?” Blake narrows his eyes and looks Ethan up and down. Perhaps it does look a little sketchy for me to show up with an incredibly attractive male “friend” who I’ve just spent several weeks with.
“Yes, friend.” Ethan offers his hand to Blake to shake. Blake hesitates for a moment but finally accepts the gesture. “I’m glad you are back and feeling ok.”
“That was quite a long vacation you took,” Blake says to me.
“Well, it wasn’t all vacation,” I tell him. “But, no matter. Thank goodness you’re okay. I have been sick with worry.”
Ethan interjects, “You know, I’m going to get back into the city to see how my house held up while I was away. It was good to see you again, Blake. Kira thinks the world of you. You’re a very lucky guy.”
“Thanks for bringing me back.” I want to hug him but don’t think Blake would react kindly. So I smile and tell him I’ll see him soon. When the door closes, Blake wraps his arms around me.
“I thought he’d never leave. I’ve been waiting an awfully long time to do this.” He backs me against the front door and kisses me. He’s holding back, though, and I wonder why. Or maybe it’s me holding back. For that I know why—but I push the comparisons with Ethan aside.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“You must hate
me for leaving you like that during the flash flood.”
“That sucked, but how could you even think it would be possible for me to hate you?”
“I love you, Kira.”
I pause. It’s funny how once one person says those three little words that it’s that the other will reciprocate, and that both of you will continue to repeat those words. At some point, you stop questioning whether you meant it in the first place, and the words continue to leave your mouth. That happened with Tristan. And now, here I am again. About to tell a guy I love him. He nearly died. What else can I do? I might love him. But am I sure? Why am I second-guessing myself?
“I love you, too,” I finally say, though the crack in my voice may reveal my uncertainty about it.
“What about Ethan?”
“He’s a friend. I thought I mentioned that.”
“As in friends with benefits? Or just friend-friend?” he asks.
I playfully shove him. “You are so jealous. It’s too bad you didn’t lose that attribute with your skin.” I’m well aware that I don’t answer his question, but we’re not going to discuss it in this house with others listening. “You know, I feel like I’ve just been locked up inside forever. Can we go for a walk? On the upper trail of the canyon? I’m not quite up to hiking down it yet.” I’ll never let myself get trapped down low in canyons again.
“Sure,” he responds. “Bear with me, though. I’m a little slow.”
We walk. And talk. Oh how I’ve missed our conversations in the canyons. I breathe in the putrid, warm air and run my hands along the prickly shrubbery, thrilled to be outside. Blake asks me for details about my “vacation.” I gloss over my recovery from the flood, the video, and my trip home. And even though I’m talking to Blake, I take care when speaking of the traumatic “incident” with my parents and Jared. The brainwashing had the intended effect.
I explain that the SCI had Jared return with me after there was an “accident” with my parents. I’m honest about the faked relationship with Ethan, including the kissing, although I say the kisses meant nothing. Liar. I may be attracted to Ethan, but it doesn’t matter. I chose to just be friends with him and let him pursue the love of his life. Blake is less than happy to know I shared saliva with Ethan.
“I think there’s more to your trip that you aren’t telling me. You really expect me to believe your parents died in an accident?” I knew he wouldn’t buy it.
“Blake, please don’t push me on it.”
“You don’t know me very well if you think I’ll let it go.” His body language tells me that he’ll never forgive me if I don’t tell him the truth.
“It’s my fault they died. I didn’t want to come back. In fact, I refused to come back. My parents and several girls Ethan dated died because I wanted to be able to eat out, watch movies, and lay out by the pool.” I pause to brush tears from my eyes. “I was clearly told there’d be consequences if I wasn’t cooperative but thought I could get away with it. I should have known better. The last time I tempted fate, all my friends died.”
“Oh, Kira.” He takes me in his arms. “It’s not your fault.”
“You can’t breathe a word,” I whisper. “Or they’ll lock me back up or Exile me. Or they will kill Jared. They still have him.”
“What do you mean lock you back up?”
“Ethan, Jared, and I have been back on Thera for a while but in lockdown. Brad Darcton felt we could all benefit from therapy,” I explain. “Jared hasn’t been too cooperative, though, so he’s stuck there for longer. I can’t risk his life, Blake. I just can’t.”
“Perhaps there is hope that we’ll all be free soon. My dad and the other Exilers plan to attack. I found a way into the city that doesn’t involve crossing the Eco barrier. I’m not sure it’s the best idea, but they’re going ahead with it whether I like it or not.”
He proceeds to catch me up on his ridiculously dangerous mission and near-death inducing return. He tells me about the different Exiler factions with competing strategies. The Militants’ plan is crazy. Suicidal. I don’t want Blake to have any part in it. It doesn’t sound like he wants any part of it either. He assures me that Ted has given him a foolproof, risk-free way to help his father but avoids mentioning the details which means it isn’t foolproof or risk-free. What should I do? I’m not willing to lose him again. We can’t fight the SCI in the way his father is advocating. Our best hope’s to avoid making waves and stay alive until we can find a way to get out.
“Gads,” he says. “I forgot to tell you the biggest news. Right after I got back, Tristan and Bri invited me to one of their out of control parties. They got raided and hauled down to SCI Headquarters. The Ten Cleaved them there.”
“Ha ha. That serves them right. The two of them belong together.”
“Not just Tristan and Bri. All of them.”
I’ve been back for three nights and still haven’t seen all the happily Cleaved couples. Spud Rosenberg brought us orders from the Ten to refrain from any interaction with them to “allow them time to acclimate to their new circumstances.” Fine with me. I have no desire to rush the reunion with Tristan and Bri and want the alone time with Blake. Not that our private time has gone as well as I’d have liked.
Spud completely mucked with our schedule. To avoid the Second Chancers, Blake and I have free time and exercise time in the evening with classes after midnight. So, we spend all evening in the canyons disagreeing over his plans to help the Exilers, the late night hours quietly fuming while trying to concentrate on school work, and early morning “making up” by making out. And even that has been tame since Blake moans every time he’s touched. The grafts are pretty nasty, I must say. They’re healing, but his back and arms look like skin patchwork quilts. I just thank my lucky stars that he survived. Had the detonators not catapulted him farther up onto the beach, I’d be saying goodbye to yet another boyfriend.
Our area of contention is that Blake is still intent on delivering a knockout punch to the leadership of the SCI—although he’d like to devise a plan more proactive than his friend, Doc Daryn, and less extreme than his father. I’m determined to avoid any contention with the SCI until we have a foolproof plan. Enough people have died at my hands. He doesn’t understand my point of view, and although I sympathize with his, I think the outcome of his plan will be failure for the Exilers and pain and suffering for the rest of us.
Tonight, we’ve been invited to attend the first ever Garden City Cleaving Festival at Headquarters Plaza. The entire city has been summoned, and special attire has been issued to wear for the event. Surprisingly, I like the outfits they picked to represent Garden City. I’m wearing a lightweight, wispy dress with floral pattern and hidden pockets. Blake has on a light yellow, short-sleeved shirt, green pants, and tie that matches my dress. He has been complaining about the short sleeves as one of the grafts on his arms shows, but I assure him they’re healing so well that no one will notice. A small white lie.
We arrive shortly before midnight, and the crowds have amassed. It reminds me of how Times Square looks on New Year’s Eve, though it is at least a hundred degrees out, and everyone’s dressed in the same clothes. The heat generated by all those bodies is being offset, only slightly, by ventilation holes in the concrete surface that are blowing cool air up into the crowd. So, at least my feet and legs feel mildly comfortable. The air being piped in has a slight pleasant scent to it. Aromatherapy to combat all the body odor, perhaps, or a drug to pacify the masses?
A large stage has been constructed in the middle of the crowd, and booths are surrounding the plaza. Giant screens sit atop the booths and have projected images of some of Garden City’s most prized murals. The entire plaza has a warm glow.—not bright enough to wash out the screens, but enough to see well in the dark of night. Did they portal in a party planner from Earth? It’s uncharacteristically festive for Thera. I scan the crowd to see if I know anyone. Or, should I say, to see if I can catch sight of Ethan, not having seen him since I reunited wit
h Blake. I’m sure he’s here, but with everyone dressed the same, it’s worse than playing Where’s Waldo.
At midnight sharp, seven men and three women take the stage, Brad Darcton among them. Brad climbs onto a five-foot tall podium atop the stage and addresses the crowd. Then, he introduces the Presiding Ten of the Grand Council. Was one of the women another Darcton? Blake whispers something about going to find a restroom, and I’m left to watch the spectacle alone.
“We are thrilled to have the opportunity to address the Garden City residents tonight,” Brad says. “And to celebrate our heritage and beautiful prospects for the future with each of you.”
He tells the love story of Helina and Hadrian and how they tenderly cared for their garden. How their children were special and had the ability to overcome Day and Night, Dark and Light. How the blood of the Originals still runs through the veins of those on Thera. And how we honor the Originals by Cleaving and bringing new generations of Original-blooded Therans into the world.
“The Ten is thrilled to present Garden City’s newest Cleaved couples.” He motions for them to come up on stage. I scan the stage. Notably missing is Bailey Goodington. There’s no way she would have missed that party. I’ll have to ask Blake why she isn’t up there. “These forty young pairs put their faith in the Cleaving process. Furthermore, they agreed to parent the next generation of Theran youth without delay. It is with great joy, I announce that each couple is confirmed pregnant thanks to our Assisted Pregnancy process.”
Wild cheers and shouts of congratulations fill the air. The couples on stage look genuinely happy. However, I stay silent. The math isn’t working for me. I know how long it took to shoot me up with drugs before they took my eggs. There hasn’t been enough time since they Cleaved to retrieve the eggs, create embryos, insert the embryos back in, and confirm the pregnancies took—unless they’d already done the egg retrieval on all the girls previously? Perhaps they’d been planning this for a while?
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