by Gerri Hill
CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
Jake lifted the lid on the pizza box, her eyes darting between Nicole and Rick. Proper police procedure would dictate that they not discuss anything in front of Nicole. However, Jake felt like Nicole had a right to know what was going on. And, because things were personal between them, she would no doubt tell Nicole everything anyway. But Rick would think it very unusual for them to discuss things out here in the open.
Fuck it.
“Beer?”
“Sure,” Rick said.
Nicole nodded, her chin still resting on her palms. Cheyenne was leaning against Nicole’s leg. Most likely because she remembered the handouts from previous dinners. Nicole buried her hand in Cheyenne’s fur, lightly stroking.
“You holding up okay?” Jake asked for the third time.
Nicole nodded. “It doesn’t seem real yet. I’m sure tomorrow, it’ll hit.”
Jake met her eyes briefly, then nodded at her as she placed three beers on the table. “I want to talk about the stalker.”
“Why?” Nicole asked.
“Because it doesn’t add up. Whatever happened that night has been wiped from our system,” she said.
Rick cleared his throat, and Jake slid her eyes to him. Both his eyebrows shot up. She ignored him and took a piece of pizza instead.
“I had lunch today with Susan Rice. From dispatch.”
“Yeah?” Rick asked, before shoving pizza in his mouth.
“The only way records disappear is if a superior orders them wiped. And that is highly unusual.” Jake leaned closer to Rick. “And get this, Lieutenant Gregory was with dispatch six years ago.”
“What the hell does that have to do with anything, Jake?” He motioned with his head to Nicole, who’d been silent. “And is this something we need to discuss here?”
“Yes, it is. Saves me having to tell her about it later,” Jake said easily.
Rick looked first at Nicole, then Jake. “Something I should know about?” Rick asked quietly.
Jake and Nicole exchanged glances, their eyes holding. Finally, Jake shook her head. “No. I just feel like, Nicole’s at the center of this; she has a right to know what’s going on.”
“And I’m assuming you trust her to keep all this to herself?”
“I trust her completely.”
There was silence around the table as the three of them shifted gazes. Rick broke the silence by taking another piece of pizza.
“Okay. Your call, McCoy. So what about Gregory?”
Jake tipped her beer bottle at Rick before continuing. “He’s acting very weird. Yesterday, and the day before, he was all for having a car follow Nicole around. Hell, he wanted to bring her in. And he was curious about the stalker not existing in the system. Today when I talked to him, he said he was going to pull the car off Nicole, that it was a waste.”
“What?“
“Yeah. And when I brought up the stalker, he told me to leave it alone, that it had nothing to do with this case. He ordered me to ditch the stalker.”
“But why?”
“I had no idea at the time. Then at lunch, Susan tells me that Gregory was the sergeant over dispatch.”
“And you think he knows about my stalker?” Nicole asked.
“Either he’s remembered it, or he knows about the coverup.”
“Oh, Jake,” Rick warned. “You start talking coverup, and you’re opening up a whole can of worms.”
“I talked to her neighbor this morning, a Mr. Reynolds,” Jake said.
“You did?” Nicole asked.
“Yes. And he had exactly the same story you did. Two units responded. He and his wife heard the shooting, saw the body on the lawn. Saw them toss the suspect into the patrol unit without waiting for an ambulance.”
“But there’s no record of it?”
“None.” Jake turned to Rick. “I talked to Steven over in IT about it.”
“Steven?”
“You know, tall, skinny guy… wears glasses. Typical computer geek.”
“I don’t know him. How do you know him?”
“Oh, hell, Rick, we met him a couple of years ago,” Jake said impatiently. “He hacked into a computer for us… the teenager who was having sex with her teacher.”
“Oh, yeah. That guy.” Rick grinned. “He had such a crush on you.”
Jake blushed and glanced quickly at Nicole who smiled warmly at her. “He did not have a crush,” she murmured. “Anyway, Steven is going back over the logs in dispatch, to see if he can find… dead time, he called it. If he finds some, then he’s going to hack into the 911 log and do the same thing.”
“If he finds something in 911, you know we can’t use it.”
“If he finds something period, we can’t use it. But we’ll at least have grounds to push for a subpoena for their tapes.”
“That’s assuming the lieutenant will go along with it.”
“Well, yeah, there’s that.”
“We’re forgetting about the four officers that responded. Four potential witnesses.”
“Or four potential murderers. Remember, they drove up and shot this guy. He had no weapon that Nicole saw.” Jake turned to her. “Right?”
“Right. He was on the lawn, watching me through the window. He was standing there, hands in his front pockets. When the police came, he walked toward them, hands held up in the air. There were two or three shots maybe. That’s the last I saw. I ducked down on the floor. Then one of the officers came to talk to me, to tell me that it was all over.”
“Makes no damn sense,” Rick said.
“Nicole, did anything stand out? The guy that came to talk to you, was he in a standard issue uniform?”
“How would I know if it was standard issue?”
“Okay, was anything out of place? Shoes? Cap? What about the cars?”
Nicole shook her head. “Jake, this was six years ago. I can close my eyes and see the scene unfold, but it’s just shapes, shadows. And the stalker, I never saw his face. He wore a stocking over his head that night. I have this distorted image of him is all.”
“Didn’t you think it odd that there wasn’t a follow-up investigation?” Rick asked.
“Yes, now I do. But at the time, I was just so thankful it was over. I was able to resume my life, my practice, and it just became a bad dream. A bad dream I didn’t want to think about.”
Jake put her elbows on the table, staring at Rick. “You think I’m reaching at straws here?”
Rick shrugged. “Well, considering we got shit as it is, it makes sense to follow up on the stalker.”
Jake turned to Nicole. “The only link we have between the victims is the crisis center, but that’s getting us nowhere.”
Nicole frowned and shook her head. “Lori was never at the crisis center.”
Jake’s eyes widened. “What?“
“No, Lori wasn’t sexually abused. She was borderline schizophrenic. She’d been seeing Dorothy—Dr. Peterson—since she was a teenager. She’d had a couple of suicide attempts when Dr. Peterson recommended that she see me, thinking I could reach her.”
“Well, fuck,” Jake said, locking glances with Rick. “The first four victims being from the crisis center was a goddamn coincidence?” She shoved her chair away from the table, pacing across the kitchen. “Great. Now we got less than shit!” she said loudly.
Nicole and Rick both stared at her, and Cheyenne pressed closer to Nicole as Jake pounded her fists on the counter.
“Jake, stop,” Nicole said quietly.
Jake shook her head. “No! How can I even begin to protect you when this guy is like a fucking ghost?”
“I won’t go back to the office. I’ll have Catherine shuffle the appointments. I won’t go to my house. I’ll… do whatever you say.”
Jake met her eyes, oblivious to Rick. “Nicole, what if I can’t protect you?” she whispered. “What if I… can’t?”
“That’s not going to happen, Jake. We’ll be fine.”
“Excuse me,
but… hello, I’m still here,” Rick said. He pointed at Jake. “And don’t tell me there’s nothing going on with you two.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You know what the fuck I’m talking about.” Rick glanced at Nicole, then back at Jake.
“Goddamn, Rick, just let it go.”
Rick pounded his fist on the table. “I want to know what the hell is going on!”
Jake shoved her hands in the pockets of her jeans, facing Rick. She shrugged. “There’s nothing going on.”
“I’m not blind,” he said. He glanced at Nicole again. “I’ve known you five years, Jake.” He motioned between the two of them. “And this is a first.”
Jake sat down again. “Look, Nicole and I have developed a… friendship. And yeah, I know it’s not procedure, but the fact remains that she’s not simply a witness or a piece of the puzzle.”
“Jake, you know you can’t—”
“No. I can, Rick.” Jake reached across the table and grabbed Rick’s hand. “Nicole means something to me, Rick.” She glanced quickly at Nicole, then back at Rick. “Do you know how long it’s been since someone’s… meant something to me?” she whispered.
Rick stared at Jake, then looked at Nicole. He shook his head. “Walk me out, Jake.” He stood, touching Nicole’s shoulder briefly before walking away.
Jake nodded, then leaned over and squeezed Nicole’s hand. “If you’re tired, go on to bed,” Jake said.
Their eyes locked.
“Will you join me?”
Jake wanted to shake her head, saying she would take the couch, but Nicole’s eyes were holding her, and she slowly nodded.
“We should… talk,” Jake said.
Nicole gave a half smile. “At the very least.”
“I’ll be right back.”
Rick was waiting at the door, and they both walked out into the cold night air. The wind was blowing the young spruce tree on the corner, and Jake caught the scent of the tree and inhaled. At night, like this, when the city was obscured, the scent of this lone spruce could almost make her feel like she was in the mountains. Almost. But then a car, a horn, a door slamming, would bring her back to the present. Like now.
“How long has this been going on?”
Jake tucked her hands under her armpits and tilted her head. “I met her in late August, up in the mountains.”
“What? You knew her before this? And you still didn’t say any-thing?”
“Say what? We spent one night together in a tent. We didn’t even exchange names when she left. I was already working this case when she came into it. It was too late for me to back out.”
“But you’re involved with her, Jake. Jesus Christ!”
“Ricky, I’m trying hard to separate this. I know the risks, I know the protocol. And I know Lieutenant Gregory would pull my ass from this case if he knew.” She stepped closer. “But this is our case. I’m not letting my feelings for Nicole overshadow that. Rick, that’s why I wanted you to stay with her tonight. I wanted to separate a bit.”
Rick ran a hand through his hair. “Now what the hell am I supposed to do?”
“Does it matter any if I say that I might be in love with her?”
“Jesus Christ! Are you serious?”
Jake tilted her head, her eyes avoiding Rick. “I’m not sure what it’s supposed to feel like, Rick. So I might be way off base here.”
“Well fuck me,” Rick muttered. “We don’t have time for this, Jake! You can’t feel something for this woman now, okay?”
“I’m sorry. But I do.” Jake grasped Rick’s arms. “For the first time in my life, I feel something, Ricky. She’s like… gotten inside me. I can’t walk away from it.”
“Christ Jake! Now?”
Jake dropped her hands. “It’s not like it matters, Rick.”
“What do you mean?”
Jake shrugged. “She’s a doctor for Christ’s sake. You’ve seen her in her power suits. I’m a lowly cop. I don’t exactly fit.”
“So then what the hell is going on?”
“We have this… attraction. It doesn’t mean it’s going anywhere.”
“But you said you were in love with her.”
Jake gave a sad smile. “Takes two, Ricky. And I know my place. But she’s important to me. Okay?”
Rick pointed his finger. “Don’t get yourself hurt over this, Jake.”
“No.” Jake took his arm and walked him to his truck. “But we’re okay, right? Lieutenant doesn’t need to know, nobody needs to know.”
“Are you sure you can do this?”
“Of course, Ricky. I know what my job is.”
“Okay, I’m going to trust you on this.”
“Thanks.”
Jake surprised Rick by the tight hug she gave him, and the quick kiss on the lips.
“Jesus, you want to start rumors, or what?” Rick said, wiping at his mouth.
“Be careful going home.”
“Yeah, yeah.”
Jake waited until his lights faded before going back inside. She was actually a little nervous. Like she’d told Rick, she and Nicole had not talked about their relationship. Nicole may be feeling none of the emotions that Jake did. It may simply be sex to her. Jake paused before opening the door, her mind flashing back to last night. Nicole’s touch had been soft, sure. Her eyes did not lie, and it hadn’t been just sex. Last night, Nicole had made love to her. And she had loved Nicole. The thought of that caused an odd sensation in her stomach. It didn’t matter that she knew they had no future. And it was so ironic. All these years of random dating, random sex, never really meeting someone who stirred her. Never finding that one person who made her ache with wanting.
Nicole made her ache.
And Nicole was someone she couldn’t have.
———
Nicole went into Jake’s bedroom. She was exhausted, both mentally and physically. They had not slept much last night, not really. She felt a slight blush creep up her face as she recalled their night of lovemaking. Nicole had always been rather shy in bed, a lingering remnant from her chubby high school days, no doubt. But with Jake, there was nothing shy about her touch. Nicole transformed into a sensual, insatiable woman in Jake’s presence.
And they had spent hours loving each other last night.
Nicole stood in the bathroom, looking at her reflection in the mirror. Jake’s words to Rick echoed in her mind. Nicole means some-thing to me. Did she really mean something to Jake? She met her eyes in the mirror, nodding. Yes, Jake’s touch was too intimate, too… loving. Nicole nearly shivered, remembering. And tonight? What would happen tonight? Would they continue to pretend that this was just sex?
———
Jake moved quietly through the house, putting the pizza box into the fridge and turning off lights. Cheyenne followed her every move, although her eyes darted into the bedroom.
“Yes, she’s in there,” Jake said quietly. “Waiting for us.” She paused in the living room, hearing Nicole leave the bathroom. She could imagine Nicole sliding under the covers, waiting. Would she be naked? Jesus, they needed to talk.
“Jake?”
Jake stood still, listening to the question hanging in the air. She closed her eyes for a second, then made herself move. “Yeah. Coming.”
She stopped in the doorway, the dark bedroom lit only by the light from the bathroom. Nicole was leaning up against the pil-lows, thankfully covered by a T-shirt. Jake stared, nonetheless.
“You wanted to talk?”
Jake nodded, still unable to move. She saw Nicole smile.
“Going to talk from way over there?”
Jake chuckled, then walked into the room. “Let me grab a shower first. Okay?”
“Sure.”
Nicole watched her disappear into the bathroom, wondering at Jake’s hesitancy. But she knew, didn’t she? Here in bed, like this, they would get little talking done. And again, there was Jake’s admission to Rick that Nicole meant something. That frightened he
r a little. It was one thing to be physically, sexually attracted to the woman. Quite another should she feel something for Jake… in her heart. And Nicole knew she was dangerously close to falling in love with Jake, something she never would have thought possible. Certainly not in late summer when they’d had their tryst in the mountains, and certainly not when Jake had walked back into her life so unexpectedly. As she’d told herself—and had been told by others—Jake was just not her type.
Well, that hardly mattered now. She heard the water turn off, and she only had to close her eyes to imagine Jake standing there naked, water still glistening on her skin. She took a deep breath. No, they would get little talking done.
———
Jake stared at herself in the mirror, trying to shake her nervousness, wondering why it had such a grip on her. Maybe because last night had been so unexpected, that she hadn’t had a chance for thought. Tonight, however, if she walked out of this bathroom and into bed with Nicole, it was a totally conscious decision. Because she knew, once she crawled in beside Nicole, they would not talk. They would touch, they would make love. And the case would fade away, if only for a few hours.
Was that so bad?
Jake closed her eyes briefly. It wasn’t like she had a choice. Not really. For some reason, her body overrode her good sense when it came to Nicole.
With one last look in the mirror, she moved away, dutifully having donned a T-shirt to cover her nakedness. She would at least pretend they were going to talk.
She opened the bathroom door and flipped off the light at the same time. The tiny nightlight against the far wall softened the shadows in the room. But still, Jake hesitated.
“Come to bed,” Nicole instructed quietly.
Those softly spoken words caused Jake’s heart to pound just a little faster, and she again wondered what it was about Nicole that could turn her into a big mush ball.
But her feet moved, carrying her closer to the bed, closer to Nicole. She noticed that Cheyenne had chosen Nicole’s side of the bed to guard, lying quietly on the floor, not even begging to jump up. She paused again, wondering what to say. Wondering if she should say anything at all.
Then Nicole sat up.