I move closer, so close that when I look down at her our noses almost touch. I whisper and touch her face. “I’m not going to disappear. Not if you want to keep me.”
She turns her cheek away from my hand and takes a step back. “No. You did disappear. You did it in September when you left me to go find Juliet, you did it yesterday when you left me to report to my father. Valentine’s Day was a mistake. I should have never—”
I clench my jaw. As I try to listen, my head pounds, and my voice starts somewhere deep inside my gut. “Stop!” I growl the word then yell, “Stop making excuses.”
She shakes her head and pushes me away. “Leave me alone.” In a flash, she turns and runs through the exit doors and disappears.
Back in my room, my head screams at me, and I collapse onto my bed. I’m tired of fighting for us. Both of us have to hang on, not just me. Megan’s been hanging on by a thread, a thread she just cut.
So fuck it. I’m done.
Megan
I manage to clean myself up and make an appearance in the lounge for Sunday night dinner. After the display Ben and I made in the hallway, nobody gives me a hard time about leaving before he shows up. With a “hi” and a “bye,” I march in one side of the lounge then out the other, apologize to the mural of Frank on the ceiling, and trudge through the snow to the Student Center.
With the weather, the Center isn’t buzzing with its usual activity. I find a big plush chair to plop into and swing my legs over the side. Although I want to crawl into a hole and hibernate until the spring, the big chair does the trick for now. I curl up in it and shut my eyes.
My mother didn’t want me. Dad pays her to stay away. I try to empathize with her. To put myself in her shoes as a college student, pregnant, scared. I get the feeling she had neither a dad like mine, who would help her through it, nor the financial means to raise a child on her own. The whole situation can be spun in a more positive light. Like instead of “dad bribed her to leave me,” it can be “dad offered to financially support her if she agreed to have the baby.” Maybe she wanted me all along. Maybe it’s all a miscommunication.
Still, I don’t understand the continuation of the money. What does she have on him? Is there a secret bigger than me that they are hiding? Is he the source of the “investments” she supports herself with?
May as well go to the source.
Penelope’s phone rings three times before she picks up.
“Hi, sweetie,” she says. “How’d you fare in the storm?”
“Not so great. I’d love to get out of here.”
“Well, you know you’re welcome to come stay with Brendan and me if you can get here.”
Her invitation is the answer I’m looking for. I can spend time with her and ask about the money thing, the secrets, the blackmail, or whatever I want. I could spend time with my mother and brother.
“Classes were canceled tomorrow while they clean this mess up. If I can get a ride, can I stay overnight?”
Penny sounds thrilled, and Brendan whoops in the background when she tells him. His little voice makes me smile. Brendan asks if Mr. Ben is coming too. “He’s welcome to join us,” she says.
“Not this time.” I shudder, unsure if Ben will ever be anywhere with me again. “I can’t wait to see the little guy. I’ll text you when I’m close.”
As I’m about to hang up, Penelope stops me. “Amelia?”
“Yep.”
“Thanks for giving us a chance.”
My insides warm. “Thanks for giving me a chance.”
I hang up and look around the Student Center. Now to find a ride.
I call Chase and beg him to drive me to Fort Lee. He asks me if I think that’s a good idea. I wasn’t expecting a discussion.
“I think it’s an excellent idea. I need to get away, just for the night.”
Chase hesitates. “I heard you and Ben fighting, and I know he’s worried about you. I don’t want to drive you somewhere and have something happen, and it’s my fault. Just wait until the weather gets better and your mind relaxes. Then see how you feel.”
I swear the basement is on a mission to make me miserable. “Forget it, Chase. You know, of all people I thought you’d understand.”
He sighs. “I know what it’s like to want parents, for that safety net, for the security, for the love, but something’s off with this woman—”
I clench my phone so hard I’m afraid it’s going to break. “That woman is my mother.”
“The whole thing is sketchy. Why don’t you wait a couple days? Talk to your dad. Talk to Ben.”
My face heats. “Why can I not make a decision on my own? Am I not capable of doing anything without talking to my dad or Ben?”
“It’s like I said. You want it too badly, Megan. You’re not seeing things clearly.”
“Maybe I’m the only one seeing things clearly, Chase. Did you ever think of that?” I hang up and throw my phone into the empty chair next to me.
“Whoa!” I know the voice but can’t place it.
I sit up, turn, and end up looking into the twinkly eyes of Second Floor Dave. “You look agitated, Basement Girl.”
He hands me my phone and sits next to me. There’s about three feet of snow on the ground, but he’s wearing cargo shorts. I don’t ask. I’m not in the mood to talk to boys about the things they do. In fact, the thought of boys makes me nauseous at the moment.
I look him up and down. “I’m looking for someone to do me a favor.”
He leans forward and rests his elbows on his knees. “What do you need?”
“Do you have about two hours and a car?”
Dave twists his lips into a cute sideways pucker. “Maybe that can be arranged. Where are you going?”
“Fort Lee.”
“Tonight? In this snow?”
“I’ll make it worth your while. Name your price.” Dave raises his eyebrows and looks me over, and I wonder if he thinks I’ll sleep with him. My mood lifts, and I can’t help but smile. “Not that. Anything else though.”
“I’m kidding, and Ben would beat the crap out of me anyway. Well,” Dave sings in his purry voice. “If I can’t have you…”
“Who? Who do you want? I’ll make it happen.”
He looks at the ground then glances at me through his long eyelashes. Is he shy? “Who?” I reach out to poke his knee.
He rubs the back of his neck and sighs. “Magdalena Patrinski.”
Magdalena. “Maggie?” She’s the girl he’s been crushing on who had a boyfriend? Come to think of it, that night at The Study, Dave became super fidgety around Maggie. Very interesting.
Dave raises his eyebrows. “I heard she broke up with the Buddy Holly dude. Set me up on a date, and I’ll get my roommate’s car and drive you to Fort Lee. It’s a Mercedes. Makes for a nice ride.”
I giggle at his enthusiasm. He’s so pathetically cute and amazingly sweet, and I really need a ride. I excuse myself and call Maggie.
“Meg! Where’d you go? You and Ben are total cranky asses. He stormed out somewhere too, so you can come back—”
“I need you to do me a favor.”
“What’s up?”
I scrunch my face and cringe as I ask. “I need you to go on a date.”
“What? I’m not ready to date, Meg. What’s this about?”
I look over my shoulder at Dave, who’s saying hi to someone across the room. “Second Floor Dave will help me out with something if I arrange a date with you.”
“Are you nuts? What am I, a prostitute?”
“Come on, Mags. I would do it for you.”
Maggie’s silent on the other end of the call. “Please?” I look at Dave, who’s wandering the Student Center, checking out the bulletin boards. “Everyone thinks he’s a player, but he’s so nice and sweet. It would be for me, your roommate, who loves you.”
No response.
“Don’t you think he’s cute?”
“He’s adorable,” Maggie says. “I can’t imagine he
’d want to hang out with me.”
“Why not? You’re perfect.”
“Because he sat behind me during psych last semester and never said a word to me. Remember when he knocked me over at The Study then left me on the floor? Arranged dates never work. It’s too much pressure.”
“Come on, Mags! Where’s your sense of adventure? Just go and have the experience, and if it sucks, I’ll save you.”
Maggie sighs. “On one condition.”
“What?” I hold my breath.
“You tell me where you’re going.”
I think about lying, but Chase knows anyway, which means Juliet knows, which means Ben is sure to know. Come to think of it, Ben knowing probably means my dad and Uncle Pisser know. So I tell Maggie the truth, leaving out the controversial parts.
“Your mother?” The inflection of her voice gives away her enthusiasm. “Of course you should go! You’ll tell me everything?”
“You’ll go out with Dave?”
“Yes. Fine. Set it up for after spring break.”
“Yay! Thanks! I’ll keep in touch.”
I hang up with Maggie and motion to Dave. When I tell him Maggie agreed, his lips curl into a wide, sexy smile. “Road trippin’ with the Basement Girl. Let’s go get those keys. You ready?”
“I’m ready,” I tell Dave. “Get me out of here.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
Ben
After Megan doesn’t show for Sunday night dinner, I storm out too. Then I decide to go back, determined not to be that guy who freaks out over a woman. No matter how much I like her and how much I really want to freak out. Instead, when the dinner group clears, I bring my physiology book into the lounge and look over the chapters the professor’s lecturing on for the next class.
In minutes, Chase sits next to me. “So Megan called me.”
“Oh?” I act uninterested, even though I know I don’t have to with Chase.
“She wanted a ride to Fort Lee.”
Dammit. I should have known she’d run to her newfound mother. “Uh-huh.” I flip the thick pages of the textbook, looking but not seeing each page.
Chase doesn’t move. “That’s it?”
I stop the mindless movement and put the book between us. “She’s not my concern anymore. She doesn’t want me around.” My words defy my brain, which is swimming with thoughts about how to handle this. I know one thing for sure—I’m not calling Big Joe.
He picks up the book and starts fanning the edges of the pages. “I told her no. I wouldn’t take her.”
I don’t react, careful to hide my emotions. Thank God Chase didn’t bring her.
Maggie walks into the lounge in workout clothes and climbs onto the treadmill. “Take who where?” She straddles the machine and lifts her hair into a ponytail. How Winston ever landed someone as hot as Maggie is a mystery for the ages. Still, the only girl I ever think about these days is Meg. My perfect match.
“Your roommate,” Chase says, “to Fort Lee.”
She moves onto the belt and presses buttons. “Oh, Dave’s taking her.”
Chase and I look at each other. He shrugs.
“What?” I ask over the whir of the machine as Maggie starts walking.
“Second Floor Dave,” she says, matter-of-factly, as she picks up the pace on the treadmill. She opens Rocco’s workout magazine that sits on the display.
I slam my book shut, walk to the machine, and pull the emergency stop.
Maggie jolts forward as the belt stops moving. “Jeez, Ben! What are you doing?”
“Can you start from the beginning, please?” I keep my voice calm and smile at Maggie. Chase snickers in the background. I make a mental note to smack him.
She crosses her arms over her chest. “She called and said Dave agreed to give her a ride if she promised to set him up on a date.”
I raise my eyebrows. “With who?”
Maggie points to herself. “I’m the lucky winner there.”
Chase laughs. “You’re going to go out with Second Floor Dave?”
“What’s so funny?” Maggie asks. “You think I’m not good enough for him?”
“I think he’s not good enough for you,” Chase says. “He’s banged half the dorm.”
“Well, Megan says he’s nice and that’s just a rumor. Anyway, I promised her I’d do it, so I’m assuming he’s driving her to her mother’s house as we speak.” Maggie grabs the emergency key from my hand and replaces it in the machine. “Now, if you two would be kind enough to let me get my walk in, I’d appreciate it.” She taps a program into the machine. The belt starts to move again as she aggressively flips pages on Rocco’s magazine.
I look at Chase, and he shrugs.
“What do you want to do?” he asks.
“I have an idea,” Maggie says. “Why don’t the two of you leave her alone?”
Maggie’s right of course. I should let it go. As I walk out of the lounge, my cell rings and “Uncle Sal,” my code name for Big Joe, flashes. I enter room six before I pick up.
“Ben. How are you feeling?”
I flop onto my bed, rubbing my temples. “Better, thanks. Thanks for sending Mr. Pisko for me. I had a nice chat with him.”
“No problem. I’m sorry I couldn’t get there myself.”
“I’m fine, really. I shouldn’t have been so stubborn to leave.” Especially since it made no difference for things with Meg and me.
“Do you know that Megan’s at Penelope’s?” There’s a slight twitch to his voice.
“I heard. How did you know?”
“I’m having Penelope watched. She came to me again today asking for money, threatening to tell Megan that I’ve been blackmailing her. My guy said Megan got there about a half hour ago. Where are you? Are you on your way there?”
I scoff. “No. She broke up with me. We’re over.”
“You’re going to accept that?”
“That’s what she wants.” I can barely form the words.
“Alright. I’m going to meet my guy there in case something happens. I’ll keep in touch.”
I end the call with Big Joe. I’m not going to do it. I’m not going to save Megan. This is between her and her family, and she can handle herself. Who do I think I am? Look what happened to Frank when I tried to save him. I’m going to stay right here and study physiology.
“Fuck!” I yell to the empty room. Where the hell are my keys?
Megan
Penelope lets me put Brendan to bed. After I tell him a story about a pirate lost in the city, he falls asleep with his head on my arm. I lay with him for a while and watch him sleep. He and Penelope both look like me with their blonde hair and blue eyes. I fit right into their little family.
My arm is numb, but I don’t care. I shut my eyes and start to doze off. Images of Brendan’s little face, Ben’s bearded one, my dad’s stocky one, my uncle’s handsome one—all the men in my life—circle in my mind. I can’t love them more than I already do, but I’m not sure if I’m meant to live my life with any of them.
It’s only been two nights, and I miss Ben already. I was getting too close though. I can’t be that close to anyone, not now, not with all this family garbage happening. Who am I kidding? I know that’s an excuse and that Ben was right. I ran away because I’m scared to death. Princess Chicken Shit.
I jolt when a hand touches my arm and search the dark room, lost. Penny shushes me.
“My arm’s stuck,” I whisper when I realize where I am.
She giggles, just like I do, and rolls Brendan off of me, and then she gestures for me to follow her. After she hands me a cup of hot tea, we sit in her living room under a big, fluffy blanket. It’s hard for me not to stare at her, to compare myself, to picture my dad young and in love with her. I imagine them in a dorm like Sheridan, flirting in the hallway with each other like Ben and me.
“Penelope?” I ask quietly.
“Hmm?”
I want to ask her about the money, the blackmail, but I’m afraid of the a
nswer. I’d rather enjoy sitting here with her, for at least a few minutes, and pretend. I want to drink tea with my mother and act like all is right in the world. I want to have a normal moment with her before I have to remind myself that it’s not real. So instead of asking about the money, I ask, “Where did you grow up?”
She raises her eyebrows and grins. “I grew up outside of Dallas. Have you ever been there?”
I nod. “Sure.” I’d seen many games at their stadium, usually rooting for the visiting team.
“I guess you’ve been all over, huh?” I study her as she asks, my face plus eighteen years. I’d have thought the question was innocent had it not been for the little wrinkle that formed over the top of her nose—the little pull of her brows that said a thousand words.
“Yeah, well, I traveled with the team. Or stayed home with…” My heart flutters, and I can’t mention Aunt Annie to the woman sitting before me. Not yet.
“The nanny? Did your father have nannies for you?”
I shake my head. “No. My aunt.”
“Oh. Well, it must have been nice growing up that way: travel, money, VIP treatment.” The wrinkle over her nose forms again.
“I’m not going to apologize for the way I grew up—”
“I wasn’t suggesting that you should.”
“And it wasn’t really that great. I never knew what I’d be doing or where I’d be going one day to the next. My father and uncle were superstars that lived in another world. I’d have given it all up…” For what? For a mother? Again, I can’t find the words. Instead, I ask, “Did you love my father?”
She purses her lips together then looks to the ceiling. “I don’t know. I was only eighteen. I was infatuated, I guess. Star quarterback and all that.” She looks back down at her cup, her eyes moving everywhere except to meet mine.
Then I have to ask. I have to ruin this almost perfect moment with the truth. My hands shake. I focus on my teacup and the way the liquid inside moves as I try to steady myself. My voice echoes in my head as I ask, “Why’d you do it? Why’d you let me go?”
Penelope traces her finger over the rim of her teacup, staring into it. “Your father was about to go pro. I was pregnant and scared, intimidated. By then he had people, you know, looking out for him. They told me I’d ruin his career.”
She Runs Away (The Sheridan Hall Series Book 2) Page 25