by Liz Gavin
He didn’t mind a little pain, though. It added a touch of spice to a relationship. A slow smile curved his lips up as he envisioned Keira’s sweaty, naked body writhing under his strong hands, her own hands bound over her head, while she begged him for a breather. He was going to take good care of her and she was going to love it.
For a split second, he contemplated carrying on with his plans regardless of the fact she was asleep. But, he wanted Keira to be alert to appreciate his skills. He lay down beside her, embraced her narrow waist and pinned her legs under his. He spent a long time running his fingers up and down her arms and playing with her hair until he also fell asleep.
Very early in the morning, Keira woke up feeling hot and trapped. She could hardly move and didn’t know where she was. All of a sudden, it came back to her. Paul was her husband. He had rescued her from a crazy man who had kidnapped her. It all sounded far-fetched. It was hard to believe something like that would happen in real life.
She remembered her dream. She had seen a pair of dark green eyes staring at her with so much love. She had also seen those eyes filled with rage yet she knew it wasn’t directed at her. Although she didn’t remember the face, she knew those eyes belonged to a very handsome man. It was impossible to explain how she knew that. She just did.
In the dream, he had talked to her, calmed her down, saying everything was going to be all right. She had believed him. Now that Keira was awake, she couldn’t remember the conversation they had had; but, she had the impression it was important. She felt like he had told her everything she needed to know about herself.
It was just a dream, silly.
Looking out the window, she saw it was dark outside, which meant it was early. There was no need to wake Paul. She slipped out of bed, as carefully as she could, not to disturb him. She found the top and the shampoo he had brought the night before, and took them to the bathroom with her. Without thinking, she locked the door behind her.
All the while Keira washed her hair, flashes of images came back to her. They were pretty confusing, like scattered pieces of a puzzle. She remembered watching the police take a man away, in handcuffs, as her heart sank. He wasn’t Paul. She remembered a man forcing her against her will as she struggled with him, but she couldn’t see his face because she was lying on her stomach. Another man arrived and the two men fought. She saw Paul’s face covered in blood as she begged the other man to stop beating him. He had his back turned to her, as he straddled Paul, so she couldn’t see his face. She reached her hand out to make the man turn around when she heard somebody turning the doorknob.
“Keira, are you all right in there?” Paul shouted when the door didn’t open.
The memories vanished and she cleared her throat to answer him.
“Yes, I’m fine. I’ll be out in a minute.”
“I’ll fix us breakfast, then.”
During breakfast, Keira feared Paul would bring up her reaction the night before. Instead, he talked about the weather and other unimportant things. Even though she was relieved, she wanted to know more about herself. So, she was happy when they sat down on the living room couch and Paul resumed his creative version of the facts.
“As I told you yesterday, Keira, that lunatic Slane attacked you in our hotel room but I saved you before the police came. When the gardai arrived, I had already overpowered the bastard. They had only to take him to the station.”
“I remember seeing a man in handcuffs,” she nodded enthusiastically as Paul talked.
“After the attack, you were so shaken up that you asked me to get rid of the TV sets and the radios in the house. You wanted to avoid the news about it.”
Something stirred at the back of her mind. That sounded very familiar.
“Is that why there are no TVs or computers here?”
“Well, not exactly. It started that way then we got used to it. I mean, hell, we were in our honeymoon! Not having any distractions around us gave us a sense of isolation. We were everything to each another. We didn’t need anything else.”
“I remember that!” Keira interrupted him and sprung to her feet as he leaned to kiss her.
“You do?” Paul couldn’t hide the surprise.
However, Keira didn’t notice it. A strange sense of déjà vu came over her.
“I remember being cut off from the rest of the world. I know that feeling,” she paced the living room. There were so many emotions clashing inside her that Keira couldn’t sit down. She was also having a hard time sorting them out and expressing herself.
“You are pale, love. Why don’t you sit down and try to relax?”
“I can’t. I remember the feelings but I can’t remember details. It’s so frustrating.”
The story was starting to sound plausible to her. She remembered the isolation he described. She also remembered being protected by someone who loved her very much.
“Paul, there’s something that doesn’t add up, though. I remember hiding from imminent danger, needing protection from some danger. If the police arrested this man, why would I need protection from him?”
“He was released after a short while. We didn’t understand it. Maybe he bribed somebody. The fact is he was out and you feared he would come after you.”
“That’s familiar, too.”
Keira heard bits and pieces of conversations in her head. She stopped pacing, closed her eyes, and pressed her temples. Angry voices argued about her safety. She couldn’t make out what they were saying.
“Did we argue about it?”
“We didn’t but I told the police officers off for being incompetent jerks.”
“I know you did. I remember it.”
“He eventually found our house. He got in one night and kidnapped you. He must have cocked me in the head with a gun or something because I didn’t hear or see anything. You’ve got to believe me, love,” he grabbed her hands in his and stared into her eyes. “I would never have let him take you if he hadn’t knocked me out. I swear it.”
“I’m sure you wouldn’t,” her voice was little more than a whisper.
She felt dizzy from the intense emotions and her struggle to retain the elusive images and sounds in her head. Her eyes glazed over and she fainted.
“Keira?”
Paul leapt forward and barely had time to scoop her in his arms. He put her on the couch and pulled up a chair. He was getting fed up with that situation. He didn’t know how long he could take it. They were supposed to be enjoying their honeymoon. How could he do that if Keira kept fainting on him like that? Yet, when he looked at her, his rage simmered down somehow. She drew him in at the same time as she stayed beyond his reach. He couldn’t understand it. He couldn’t fight it, either.
I’ll take a walk before I go crazy in here.
Keira came to with another splitting headache. She sat up on the couch and the room spun around her. She was tired of feeling sick all the time. She was even more tired of the blanks in her memory. She hated not knowing who she was and not remembering what had happened before the last two days. She controlled the dizziness, stood up and went to the kitchen to get the painkiller. It wasn’t there. She was going through the living room furniture looking for it when Paul returned.
“What’s going on here?” he asked her when he saw the contents of the drawers scattered over the floor.
“I need something for my head. It’s killing me.”
His blood froze in his veins. He needed to act quickly before she found the sedative.
“I might have something but it’s in the bedroom. Let me get it for you.”
“It’s fine. I’ve got it,” Keira showed him the innocent-looking painkiller bottle she had used the day before.
“That’s for children. I’ll get you something stronger.”
“Nonsense. It worked like a charm yesterday.”
He tried to take it from her but she turned around and walked towards the kitchen in search of a spoon. He went after her, rage boiling inside him once more.
They stood in the middle of the kitchen. She frowned as she turned to him.
“Why is that?”
“Don’t be childish, Keira. Just do as I say. Give me the bottle,” his voice was louder and his face was red. He was losing it.
“I’m not acting out. I just want to know why you don’t want me to take something that helped me yesterday.”
With one stride, he snatched the bottle from her hand and yelled, “What’s your problem? Can’t you follow one simple instruction without whining? Are you dumb or what?”
She blinked several times and flinched away from Paul, fearing him as he let his mask slipped away and showed his true nature. Caught up in his ranting, Paul didn’t notice any of that, though. Instead, he grabbed a glass and poured a generous dose of the red liquid.
“Here. Take it! Do you want to kill yourself? Go ahead. Take all of it, for all I care.”
He shoved the glass in her hand and Keira stared at it. She didn’t have a clue to what he meant. His actions were beyond her comprehension as well. In fact, the whole scene was too surreal. Besides, her pounding head didn’t seem fit for thinking too hard. She took a gulp of what she thought was a painkiller and sat the glass down on the table.
“Happy now?” he fumed.
“I don’t know what you’re getting at, Paul. You’re not making much sense. Then again, my head is throbbing. I can’t think straight. I’ll lie down. I hope we can talk this through when I get up.”
She went away before he could say another word. As he watched her retreating figure, he cursed under his breath. He was an idiot. He had let his temper got in the way once more. He thought she was trying to kill herself or escape. He thought she lied about the headache. Every time he lost control he did something stupid he regretted later. He had given Keira too much sedative. She was going to sleep through most of the day.
Keira didn’t know how she had gotten to that beautiful garden. It was colorful and the flowers in bloom smelled deliciously. Among the flower beds, stood a tall, redheaded woman. Her expression was serene and inviting. Keira knew her.
“Who are you? I think I know you but I can’t remember. Do I know you?”
“Not exactly. We’ve met before but I wouldn’t say you know me.”
“I’ve seen you before. I don’t know where. I’ve been confused lately. I’m sorry.”
“No need to apologize, child. You’ve been through a lot. I know it. I was there.”
“Are you my mother? I can’t remember anything and it’s driving me mad. I hate this feeling of helplessness.”
“I know what you mean, but I’m not your mother, Keira. I’m Iris Slane. Your mom is alive, you know. Your whole family is alive and they worry about you. They love you very much. Paul’s been telling you all kinds of lies, sweetie.”
Keira felt relieved and anguished at the same time. Her family was safe and she wasn’t alone in the world. On the other hand, what kind of man was Paul? Why did he tell her such vicious lies? She couldn’t trust him.
“You’re right to question Paul. He is a very dangerous, sick man.”
“Can you read my mind?”
“We can do anything here, child,” Iris smiled sweetly at somebody standing by her side. Keira couldn’t see the person. “I brought somebody to see you. He was about to give up because he thought you were dead. I had to promise him I’d find you to convince him to go back.”
Keira’s heart skipped a few beats when she laid eyes on the gorgeous man beside Iris.
“Declan!” she threw her arms around his neck, laughing and crying. “I know who you are. I know who I am, now, too.”
Everything came back to her - emotions, people, facts, places, and feelings. She got dizzy, but his strong arms around her narrow waist were all she needed to keep her safe.
“I’ve got you, love. Nobody’s going to hurt you anymore. I’m here.”
Declan kissed her hair, her moist face, and her mouth with all the love he felt bursting inside his chest. Their tears mingled as they kissed, as they whispered the sweetest words to each other, and the world around them seized to exist.
In the evening, as the effect of the sedative wore off, Keira didn’t want to wake up from that amazing dream. She was afraid she wouldn’t remember it. To her surprise, her memory was intact, when she opened her eyes and stared at living room ceiling. However, with those memories came the fear that Paul would discover she knew her real story. She needed to tread carefully. She sat up and looked around. He wasn’t there and the house was dead silent.
Maybe he ran away.
She laughed at her own joke. She hadn’t been that lucky so far. Why should she start counting on luck now? She had an idea and went to the kitchen to put her plan into motion. She found the cooking utensils and the food she needed to prepare dinner. When Paul returned, she was setting the table for them. She had found candles and a candlestick, which she was placing in the middle of the table when he entered the dining room. He was dumbfounded at the sight.
“Would you do the honors, honey?”
“What?”
“Can you light the candles while I bring the food?”
She didn’t wait for his answer which never came. Paul couldn’t believe his ears and his eyes as he sat down at the table. For the first time since he had rescued her, Keira showed him how much she appreciated him. He was so ecstatic he almost suggested they’d skip dinner and went straight to bed. He could barely wait to have her all to himself. Then, he remembered she hadn’t eaten much. She needed her strength. He salivated watching Keira set a sizzling bowl of stew in the middle of the table; although, his reaction had nothing to do with the meal. Vivid images of a naked, trussed up Keira danced before his eyes and he had to control himself to avoid actually drooling over her as she served him.
“I hope you like stew. I can’t remember my own name but I knew how to cook this. Don’t ask me how.”
She sat down and took a little sip from her plate while Paul attacked his.
“Hmm, there’s too much salt in it.”
“I think it’s perfect, Keira.”
“Really? I don’t like salty food,” she got her plate and stood up to go to the kitchen. “Are you sure you’ll eat that?”
Paul just nodded, swallowing another spoonful of her stew.
Once in the kitchen, away from his eyes, Keira poured the contents of her plate in the sink. Then, she filled it up again with the stew she had left on the stove. The one in the bowl was laced with the tranquilizer Paul kept in the painkiller bottle. She had figured it out when she woke up that evening. All the pieces of the puzzle were coming together. She understood why she had felt dizzy that day in the restaurant. Paul must have put it in her food or wine when she had gone to the bathroom. She had also slept most of the previous day after she had taken it, thinking she was taking something for her headache.
She returned, sat down again at the table and resumed eating her meal. It didn’t take long for the drug to knock him out because she had poured the whole bottle in the bowl. She barely had time to move his plate to the side before Paul collapsed on the table. Her first impulse was to accommodate him on the couch but she reminded herself that she needed to move fast.
Grabbing her coat, she ran out of the house. There was no visible moonlight in the dark overcast sky and the streetlights were too dim for her to see ahead. She slowed down her pace waiting for her eyes to adjust. She had no idea which way to go. She only knew she had to put as much distance between Paul and herself as possible. She walked up the road to the top of the hill without finding a soul. Desperation threatened her resolve when she looked around - there were no houses for miles. The only light she was able to see was too far for her to make out what it was. It could be a house. It could easily be a store, in which case, it would be closed at that time of night. Her heart sank inside her chest and she sat on a nearby rock, contemplating her options. They were limited at
best. In truth, they were quite slim.
She could walk aimlessly around the dark and cold countryside, looking for help, hoping a good Samaritan would show up out of the blue. The odds of that happening were against her, and she would end up freezing to death. Her coat was too thin.
She could go back to the house, pretend nothing had happened, and wait for another chance to escape. Paul was crazy but he wasn’t stupid. She wouldn’t be able to deceive him for too long. She needed to use her head. A crazy idea came to mind. It would be risky and dangerous to pull it off but she was running out of options.
I’m sorry, Declan. I can’t see another way out.
She sent him a silent prayer as she stood up and dragged her feet back to the cottage. She had no doubt she loved Declan deeply and she knew he loved her with the same intensity. She could only hope he would forgive her for what she was about to do.
When she got to the kitchen, she found everything exactly as she had left. She had a hard time getting Paul up and carrying him to the bedroom but she managed it. Stripping him off proved to be another ordeal for her. She was sweaty and out of breath when he finally lay on the bed in his underwear. Fortunately, the sedative was potent and he didn’t stir a muscle. She also figured out he would be out of commission at least until noon. That would give her some time to rest and prepare herself for the next phase of her plan. She took a blanket and a pillow from the closet and went to sleep on the couch.
Waking up a little while later, Keira took the chance to clean the kitchen up, getting rid of all possible incriminating evidence from the night before, in case Paul suspected something and went snooping around the place. Once she was done with it, Keira sat on the living room floor and forced herself to remember the time she had spent in yoga classes as a teenager. She used that knowledge to calm herself down and pass the time.
Around noon, she tiptoed to the bedroom. Paul’s clothes were scattered around the floor. She added hers to the mess. It suited her plan. Leaving only her bra and panties on, Keira slipped under Paul’s arm and lay on her back. His proximity threatened to undo the positive effects of the yoga exercises, but she conquered the urge to hurl.