Sean stayed close to her heels. When she attempted to enter a bedroom, he grabbed her by the waist and stopped her, then swept ahead of her to look things over.
“Clear,” he said, and she entered.
It was as empty as the rest of the house, but she closed her eyes, stream after stream of information pouring through her head. “It’s here,” she said, closing her eyes. “I’m linked.”
At first, absorbing files like this had hurt. Maybe because she’d resisted. Now it merely tickled. She knew to open her mind, to allow the documents, or whatever they were, to fill the chip (or whatever) that was inside her brain.
How much time passed as the information flowed inside her head she didn’t know. She only knew that when one hard drive emptied itself another demanded her attention. Then another. And when she finally opened her eyes, the sync complete, the bedroom was no longer as bright and the moon was high, muted golden rays seeping past the burgundy curtains over the windows.
She was panting, sweating, her limbs weak. Downloading hadn’t had this intense of an effect on her in a long time, but then these were the biggest files she’d ever downloaded.
Sean, she saw, was crouched at the far wall, facing the door and Gabby, his gun pointed straight ahead in case anyone tried to enter. He was covered by thick, white film. Clearly he’d beat at the plaster until he’d found a doorway.
“Thank God,” Sean muttered as he stood. “I thought I’d lost you.”
“Sorry.”
“Bill had a secret office down there. Computers, notebooks, but nothing I found pertained to you or those like you. You?”
“I don’t know. I have to open the files and sort through them. Which I shouldn’t do until we have a few uninterrupted hours of safety.”
“How does that work? Never mind. Tell me, but not here.” He strode to her and wrapped his strong arm around her waist. Just then, he was her anchor and she couldn’t have turned away from him even upon threat of death. “I have a lot of questions for you, but first I want to get to a safe place.”
CHAPTER NINE
Sean stole yet another car, a minivan this time, and drove into the pulsing heart of the city. There he bought another prepaid phone, then placed a call to Rowan and set up a time to meet him. In case anyone had been listening, they’d used code.
“I have two ideas about what’s going on” meant they’d meet at two.
“Come into headquarters; we’ll share a cup of the world’s greatest coffee” meant they’d meet at a local coffee shop they’d gone to once, hated, but joked sarcastically about ever since.
Having a history together helped in situations like this.
He picked a random motel and had to carry Gabby to their room. As he eased her onto the lumpy mattress, she moaned. And not the good kind of moaning. She’d begun opening Bill’s files and clearly they were paining her.
Sean settled beside her and placed a wet rag over her forehead.
She didn’t open her eyes, and her lips pulled into a tight grimace.
Hours passed with no change. He hated seeing her like this and worried about what she was doing to herself. If she pushed herself too hard . . . Damn it! He wasn’t sure how much more he could take.
“Gabby,” he said. “Break time, sweetheart.”
“I can’t do it. Hurts so bad every time I try,” she gritted out. “They’re encrypted or something. More so than anything I’ve ever seen.”
His concern intensified. “Stop trying for a minute and look at me.”
Slowly her eyelids cracked. Beautiful brown irises, glazed and slightly unfocused, soon met his stare.
“Have you ever opened encrypted files before?”
“Yes. Once. But it took a while. I was curious, you know, so I kept poking at it until something clicked in my brain and the gibberish made sense. There’s just so much here, and more than gibberish, it’s protected by a firewall.”
“Firewall?”
“It may not be actual fire in a computer, but it feels that way inside my head. Like flames are licking at my brain.”
Shit. He removed the cloth and traced his fingertips over her now-damp hairline, her temples and cheekbones. If he’d known this would happen, he never would have taken her to Bill’s. Distract her. “How do you get the files out of your head? Or do they stay there forever?” As he spoke, he stretched out beside her. To his surprise, she didn’t protest when he drew her into the line of his body but snuggled closer, her head resting on his shoulder, his arm wrapped around her back, wrist resting on her ribs.
The scent of soap drifted from her, filling his nose, reminding him of the shower they’d shared, and he breathed deeply, savoring. His cock hardened, straining against the fly of his jeans. Bad timing, buddy.
Controlling his physical needs had never been a problem for him before. Especially in dangerous situations. But then, he’d never wanted a woman the way he wanted Gabby.
“Took me forever to learn how to get rid of them,” she said. “By the time I did, my brain was so full I couldn’t process anything. I didn’t want to leave bed, just wanted to sleep all the time. And it made me sick, some of the stuff in there. Pictures I had no right seeing, plans I hope no one meant to actually see through.”
Poor thing, he thought. Young as she was, she’d been through so much. His hand glided up and down her spine, offering comfort. He wished to God he could do more for her. “So what do you have to do to get rid of them?”
“I put them in the trash.”
Literally? “I don’t understand.”
“Every computer has a trash receptacle. I had to learn to drag the files to my trash.”
The scientist who’d messed with her belonged underground, worms eating at his flesh. Not because he’d given her a way to free her brain of the shit it sucked inside—that had been a kindness—but because he’d done this to her at all.
Then you wouldn’t have met her. She wouldn’t be with you right now. Sean cupped the side of her head, angling her, and kissed the corner of her lip. “I’m sorry you’re forced to go through this.”
“Why would someone do this to another human being?” she whispered brokenly.
Sean’s hold tightened. “He’s sadistic, sweetheart. He wanted to see how much he could change you, what abilities he could give you. He probably thought to use you for his own gain.”
“Why not watch me, then? Why let me go about my life?”
Had he? Sean suddenly wondered. Maybe the scientist had let her and the others go but had somehow watched them, all these years. Because really, that’s what scientists did. Watched and observed. Tested.
How would he have watched Gabby, though?
With . . . a tracker, of course. Inside her brain. Sean’s eyes widened. That made sense. And also scared the shit out of him. It meant the crazy bastard would be able to find Gabby anywhere, anytime.
Sean could imagine the sick fuck sitting in a room, making notes, detached, clinical, sweet Gabby nothing more than a mouse in a wheel to him. But why come after her now? To keep her away from Rose Briar? He’d wondered before, but there were still holes in the theory.
The shithead hadn’t sent anyone after the other three Bill had found. The three who had died. Did Dr. Fasset think Sean planned to hurt Gabby and was therefore desperate to get her away from him? Did the doctor mean to save her, and thereby his experiment? But by saving her wouldn’t he be interfering with his experiment?
Too many questions. Sean hoped there was some type of answer in the files Gabby now had in her brain. He hoped Bill had known more about the doctor and situation than he’d shared. To be honest, though, Sean would rather wallow in confusion than watch Gabby hurt herself again.
She moaned, and he knew she was working again. He needed a better distraction. There was only one he could think of . . . You’re up, buddy. Kind of. “Let me take care of you,” he rasped to Gabby.
“Wh-what do you mean?”
Right now, she didn’t know people were c
apable of giving. Giving and expecting nothing in return. He wanted to give her something. I want to give her my heart, he thought. I love her.
He did, he realized. He loved her. There was no denying that now. He was putting her safety above his own. He was putting her well-being above that of a case. He was putting her emotional happiness above his physical satisfaction.
How could he not love her? She was smart, resourceful, witty, sarcastic, and brave. She was everything his life needed. Everything he’d never known he was missing.
To his surprise, knowing he loved her didn’t upset or scare him. It . . . calmed him. Calmed him even though he knew he couldn’t keep her much longer. He wouldn’t risk her sanity. Wouldn’t snuff out her bright light.
Yeah, she’d told him she wasn’t afraid of the darkness inside him, but fear had nothing to do with it. Eventually, his shadows would push her too far. But he had her now and he would savor every moment.
“Sean,” she said, his silence and stillness probably unnerving her. “What did you mean?”
“Here. I’ll show you.” He rolled, pinning her underneath him.
A gasp slipped from her, and then she was licking her lips. He leaned down and captured her tongue. Warm, hot, flavored with toothpaste. His cock hardened even more. But whatever he had to do to keep his own body under control he would. He would prove to her that a man—him—could be trusted to put her first, to expect nothing from her. He would prove that she could trust him. ’Cause God knew, if a woman could trust a man to walk away with a hard-on, without complaint, a woman could trust that man in all things.
Not that this would be totally for Gabby’s benefit. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t going to enjoy himself.
As Sean continued to kiss her, tongue plundering, feeding from her, he moved one of his hands to her breast. Plump, soft. Her nipple was already hard. He plucked it between his fingers, and her legs parted, allowing him a deeper cradle against her. Automatically, his hips arched and his erection rubbed against her sweet spot. She released another gasp.
He pulled from her lips and mouthed that nipple through her clothes, kneading that delectable mound as he did so. Soon she was writhing against him, her hands tangled in his hair, her leg sliding up and down his side. Another thing he loved about her: the absolutely hedonistic way she gave herself to him.
Her features were softened with her pleasure, her eyelids at half-mast, beautiful shadows fanning over her cheeks. Her lips were parted, red and dewy, shallow breath after shallow breath sawing in and out.
He traced a finger between her breasts, over her stomach, and played at her navel. Her belly quivered. Quivered again when he mapped the waist of her sweats, teasing.
“I love the feel of your skin,” he said. “Soft and smooth, like silk.”
“Of—of course you do. I’m amazing.”
He also loved that smart mouth. “I love the taste of your skin.” He licked her neck, felt her pulse jump up to meet him, fluttering wildly. “Like sugar.”
She moaned. In pleasure this time.
He sank his hand under her pants, dabbled between her legs, her panties blocking him from full-on contact.
Another moan.
“I love your heat, how wet you are.”
Her knees fell all the wider, giving him all the access he needed. He reached under the panties and sank a finger inside her, her inner walls closing around him, holding him tight.
“I love . . . I love when you do that,” she panted.
He moved that finger in and out of her, allowed a second to join the fun, and leaned down, fitting his lips over hers once more. Arousal beat through him, strong and sure, making him shake and ache and yearn. He wanted the same to be true for her and brushed his thumb over her clit.
“Sean,” she shouted. “Yes, right there. Again.”
He didn’t give it to her. Not yet. She was so close, and he wasn’t yet ready for her to come. Wanted to prolong the moment, cause her enjoyment to soar to new heights.
“Inside me,” she said. “Now.”
“Am.” A third finger slipped inside her, stretching her.
“No. You.”
“No.” In, out he moved them, faster and faster.
She was arching into the inward glide, nails digging into his scalp. “Sean,” she said. “Please. I want it. Want your cock.”
Killing . . . him . . . because he wanted to give it to her. God, did he want to give it to her. To sink balls deep inside this woman he yearned so badly to cherish, to be a part of her. But this was for her, he reminded himself.
Sweat beaded over his skin and dripped onto her, his blood on fire, burning his veins, his organs, leaving piles of ash before re-forming, stronger than before because Gabby was a part of them.
The shadows were swirling around him, thicker than they’d ever been. Thicker than even he could deal with. Just then, Gabby was his only light, his very salvation. There couldn’t have been a Sean without a Gabby. She owned him, was fused with him.
“Keep your eyes closed,” he told her. He didn’t want the darkness to scare her.
“Yes. Just . . . touch me. Kiss me.”
He meshed their lips together, teeth banging, and swallowed her gasp, her moan, her very breath before giving her his own.
“Sean,” she shouted again, inner walls locking down on his fingers. She clawed at his back, pulled on his hair, even bit him.
He stayed with her through it all, not disengaging from her until she collapsed against the mattress boneless, panting. Sated.
“Let me . . .” Eyes still closed, she fished for his fly with a trembling hand.
He rolled away from her and perched at the edge of the bed. He had to look away from her. She was a feast for his gaze, splayed out, flushed, sweat gleaming on her skin like diamonds and dark hair spilled over the pillows.
“We need to head out to meet Rowan.” Sean had thought about leaving her behind. For about two seconds. But he didn’t like the thought of Gabby being out of his sight and reach.
Especially now that he suspected she had a tracker in her brain.
“But—”
“That was for you, sweetheart. I didn’t want anything but your enjoyment.” He twisted, swiftly and roughly kissed her on the lips, and then stood. Leave us, he told the shadows. Now.
They hesitated a long while before obeying, and finally, the room’s lamp was visible. His legs shook, and he had to adjust his pants to keep from cutting off circulation in his still-swollen dick.
“I don’t understand this, Sean.”
“I want to earn your trust. Like I said, I will earn it.”
The mattress creaked and he knew without looking that she’d just sat up. If it took the rest of his life, he’d prove to her that her needs came before his own. Always. No matter what those needs were and even though they couldn’t be together.
Gabby might not ever understand men. Sean in particular. He’d pleasured her—and then walked away from her. Had claimed it was for her and he’d take nothing for himself. Part of her believed him, even.
But men just didn’t do that. Didn’t give something and expect nothing in return. Not in her experience, at least. Yet he wanted her to trust him. Was determined to earn that trust. And God help her, she was beginning to. Sean did everything in his power to keep her safe. He saw to her needs. Held her, comforted her.
God, she was falling for him. He needed the information in her head, yet he hadn’t liked that she was hurting so hadn’t wanted her to probe further. It was new to her, this depth of concern from another. New and wonderful.
Could be a trick, the suspicious part of her nature insisted.
Could be the real thing, the other part of her replied.
How would she know?
“Almost there,” Sean said.
They were hand in hand and strolling down the sidewalk of a busy shopping area. She wanted to run, to hide in the shadows, but he wouldn’t let her. They needed to blend, to watch and study. To Gabby
, everyone did something suspicious. Looked at her oddly, watched her a little too long. Followed her around a corner. It was her overactive mind, she knew, but she couldn’t stop the fear. Or the headache that followed it.
At the end of the street, Sean tugged her inside a coffee shop. Only took her a second to spot Rowan. He was in a booth at the far end of the building, able to scan the entire vicinity without moving an inch.
Sean helped her into the opposite side of the booth before sliding in next to her.
Rowan slid a BlackBerry across the tabletop. “If you knew what I had to do to get this . . .” He shuddered.
“I won’t ask her name,” Sean muttered, stuffing the phone in his pocket. “But thank you.”
Rowan grinned. “Funny. And correct. So anyway, I think I figured out how you’re being tracked.”
Sean gave an almost imperceptible shake of his head, and Rowan pressed his lips together. Had she not been so focused, Gabby would have missed the exchange. “What?” she asked.
Rowan arched a brow, as if he had no idea what she wanted. “Excuse me?”
“You expect me to trust you?” she gritted out at Sean. “Tell me your suspicions.”
“I don’t want you scared,” he shot back. “And if you had known you’re the reason we’ve been found, the reason we might be found again, you would have been scared.”
“I haven’t told anyone where we are or what we’re doing!” So. He expected her to trust him but wouldn’t extend her the same courtesy? Figured.
He just looked over at her pointedly.
How dare he expect her to simply accept this as . . . as . . . he trusted her enough to take her to Rowan. Therefore, he couldn’t think that she was tattling. So what—her brain, she suddenly realized. Someone was tracking her through the wires and chips or whatever had been implanted. Of course. Her shoulders slumped and she did indeed battle a wave of fear. She could never hide, she realized. Would never be safe. Which meant as long as Sean was with her, he wouldn’t be safe.
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