by Mav Skye
Both clowns clasped hands and raised them in the air, before bowing together. When they came back up, they pretended to argue over who had to pick up the balls.
Black Frown was the first to speak out loud. “What’s a clown got to do to get seated at this joint?”
Sara glanced back at the table full of misfits, then focused her attention on the clowns. “Of course! Booth or counter?”
“Counter.”
“Right over here.”
Thomas stood to head back to the kitchen. From behind the counter, Sara said, “No, no, no, sit back down. Vern is back there. We’ll make him earn his keep.”
Black Frown sat down at the counter while the other two clowns picked up the balls that had scattered everywhere. When they had found them all, and sat down, Top Hat turned and waved at their table again.
Chloe said, “Is he… Is he waving at me?”
Thomas said, “Oh nah, that’s one of my roommates. He’s such a show-off.” He saluted back, and Top Hat turned back to the counter where Sara was setting out napkins and getting drinks.
Sharon said, “I don’t like ‘em. Not one bit.” She grabbed Chloe’s hand beneath the table and squeezed. Chloe was grateful for it.
She didn’t feel normal, but she didn’t feel like fainting, either.
Thomas shrugged. “They’re harmless, really.”
Donny said, “I wouldn’t say that.” He raised his eyebrows at Thomas as he drank his soda.
Thomas said, “I have heard a couple of rumors lately.”
Sharon said, “What kind of rumors?”
“Something about a drug deal gone bad. Carnival Circus needs the money, and there was something about causing a commotion on Saturday.”
Diana said, “The Harvest Parade, you mean?” She turned to Chloe. “Carnival Circus financed the whole parade this year. I’ve heard they have this giant float that will be brimming with clowns. Ugh.” She shivered.
Chloe glanced at the clowns, then back to Thomas. “Is that the commotion they meant?”
He shook his head. “I don’t know.”
“Speaking of rumors,” Donny said, “They found a girl’s body in a ditch off I-5 just outside of Mount Vernon last night.
“Oh,” Diana said, “I heard that on the scanner.”
Donny raised an eyebrow at her. “Several folks called in seeing a clown walking on the highway near the place where the body was found.”
Diana piped in, “She’d been axed in the ribs.”
Donny held up his hand. “That’s for the coroner to confirm.”
Erin said, “Holy—”
“Moly!” finished Sharon.
Chloe said, “Why wasn’t I informed of this?”
He shrugged. “Don’t know. City police found it. Maybe they are waiting on the coroner’s report? I suspect Chief will send out a notice sometime tomorrow.”
Chloe knew this was her moment to talk about what she had seen since she moved back. She was afraid no one would believe her—like her husband and Aunt Tanya—but she also was worried not to tell them either. “I’ve been seeing them, too.”
They all turned to Chloe and hushed. She told them about the clown hiding behind the brick wall remnant of Spindler’s Roost when she had driven to Sara’s, and the one that had been outside her sliding glass door a few days earlier—how it had hit her with a hatchet.
Sharon said, “I believe you.”
Donny grew red in the cheeks and turned deathly serious. He tapped the table with his pointer finger. “Did you file a report?”
It was Chloe’s turn to blush. “No?”
“Why the hell not? Law enforcement needs this information to catch this whack job. You know this better than anyone, Chloe.”
Chloe glanced down at her hands and bit her lip, feeling scolded like a child.
“Look,” Donny said. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to come off like that. I’m sure you have your reasons. It’s just that we’ve had other reports, call-ins, of a clown creeping around the neighborhood and scaring people. It’s nothing concrete, but I’ve just got a bad feeling about this.” Chloe was surprised at how upset Donny appeared. This was more than concern for the community—it was personal.
Diana said, “Why didn’t you file a report, Chloe? That doesn’t sound like you.”
Chloe looked up from her hands. She felt her face paling. “I… I didn’t think anyone would believe me. My Aunt and husband don’t.”
“Oh,” said Erin and Sharon again at the same time. Sharon squeezed her hand again.
Diana said, “I believe you, Chloe.”
Thomas stared quietly at the table.
Donny almost shouted, “Why on earth not? That’s absurd, Chloe. You’re an officer. Why would you let that stop you?”
Donny’s words, despite the angry tone, gave Chloe confidence. He was right; she should have trusted in herself and filed that report, despite what the people around her thought.
Diana turned an icy glare on him. “Donny.”
Chloe interrupted, “No, he’s right.” She turned to Donny. “I should have filed it. Will file it.”
Donny nodded at her. A feverish, almost desperate, expression on his face.
They were quiet, and after a while, Diana called for the ticket. “I think we all need to get together again real soon. There’s some stuff Chloe needs to be filled in on.”
“Like what?” asked Donny.
Diana said, “Trust me on this. How about everyone come to my house for dinner on Thursday. Let’s say hmm… six-ish. I make a mean spaghetti.”
Everyone agreed, though the mood at the table had changed. It was heavier, grim even.
“No, no, no, that don’t make any sense, you see?”
Chloe startled and turned toward the counter. So did the rest of the group. Even Thomas turned to see what was going on.
Top Hat pounded his fist on the counter. “You can’t not be male or female. Everyone’s got something down there. Either a hoo ha or a salami. Those are the facts of life.”
Green Tufts folded his hands and steepled his pointer fingers. “Look, I do not disagree with you. I know everyone’s got somethin’ down under. What I’m saying is that the They consider themselves neither gender, therefore, establishing a new species.”
Top Hat lifted his top hat and scratched at his orange hair, then dropped the hat back down on his head. “You’re telling me that by refusing to be called either gender that they have created a new gender.”
Green Tufts spread his fingers on the counter. “Yes and no. A species is different than a gender.”
“But every species has got to have two genders so they can populate the earth.”
“Mules.”
“What?”
“The Mule is a separate species, wouldn’t you agree?”
Top Hat nodded. “Yeah, sure. What’s that got to do with anything?”
“Mules are created by a horse mating with a donkey. A horse has sixty-four chromosomes. A donkey has sixty-two chromosomes. A mule, however, has sixty-three.”
“So? I don’t give a flying leap how many chromo-whatevers any of those beasts have. What’s yer point?”
Green Tufts explained, “My point is that though a mule is a separate species created by two other species, it cannot co-populate.”
Top Hat scratched his face. “So you’re saying a mule doesn’t have the parts.”
“No, they have the parts. They just can’t breed.”
“You’re saying they’re male and female.”
Green Tufts nodded. “Yeah, a mule can be either male or female, but they can’t…”
“Ha!” Top Hat slapped the counter. “That proves it. The They are male or female, and they can breed.”
“No, you see,” Green Tufts shook his head. “They aren’t a gender.”
Top Hat pointed at him. “But, the They are a gender because like you just said, mules have genders. You just said—”
Green Tufts interrupted, “Mules have
genders. That’s correct. And like the mule, They are a separate species.”
Top Hat plopped his elbows on the counter and buried his face in his hands. When he lifted his face, he cringed his eyebrows. “A species of what?”
“Humankind.”
“Gah!” Top Hat took off his top hat and sat it on the counter. He took a long gulp of water, and set it down. “Humankind has hoo hees and joysticks, so They can’t be humankind.”
“Sure They can. See, it’s not about what’s below, it’s what’s in here.” Green Tufts tapped his heart.
Top Hat pressed his white gloves into his chest. “What if I want to be a new species.”
Green Tufts asked, “Are you?”
Top Hat frowned. “No.”
“So that’s that.” Green Tufts beeped his own nose and sipped the soda Sara had sat in front of him.
Top Hat tapped at his jaw. “So how do They pee?”
“I don’t understand.”
Top Hat turned to him. “How can They pee if they don’t have anything to pee out of?”
Green Tufts threw his arms to the air. “I told you already, Barney! They’ve got parts.”
“Both of ‘em?”
Exasperated, Green Tufts yelled, “Yes!”
“They have both a hoo hee and a salami—at the same time?”
“Not at the same time, jackass. One or the other.”
“Ha!” Top Hat placed his hat back on his head, and folded his arms across his chest. “See? They are male or female. Just like I told you.”
Green Tufts went to speak, but Top Hat was grabbing his belly and howling. Instead, Green Tufts knocked his top hat off his head.
“Hey! What’s the big idea?” Top Hat jumped off his chair and retrieved his hat off the floor, whacking it against his leg several times to shake the dust off.
Green Tufts pointed at him. “You’re a moron. That’s the big idea.”
Black Frown said, “You two shut up already. Waitress, where’s my cheeseburger?”
Sara slid steaming plates of burgers and fries in front of the clowns as he finished his question. They dug in like beasts.
Erin said, “Sooo… what were we talking about?”
Sharon giggled.
Diana said, “I think I’m ready to call it a night. Officer Jackson, could I get a lift home?”
“Sure, what about your car?”
“I didn’t drive. Donny picked me up as I don’t like to drive in the evening.” She nodded at Donny, and he nodded back.
Erin and Thomas stood and moved their chairs, and they all scooted out of the booth. Thomas shook hands with Erin and Sharon as Diana introduced them.
Donny stepped off to the side with Chloe.
He said, “It’s been awhile.”
Chloe said, “Oh, just twenty years or so.”
Donny put his hands in the pocket of his hoodie, looking not too much older than the boy she’d had a crush on years ago. “You mentioned your husband. Do I know him? Any kids?”
She smiled. “I met Wes while I was in the Academy. He’s opening a restaurant just outside of town. It’s why we moved back.”
“Wow. Ambitious.”
“Yeah. And we have two kids. Shayla is fifteen. I’m the dreadful step-Mom.”
He laughed.
“And Chev is eight. What about you? Any kids?”
Donny shrugged. “I have a daughter, Mckayla, she’s about nine months; she just started teething.” He made a face, and Chloe said, “Ouch.”
Donny continued, “My wife and I are separated. She has that—what do you call it? Postpartum depression.”
“Oh,” Chloe frowned. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
“I mean it’s not super bad. She’s fine with Mckayla, she really is. It’s more that she seems to have an aversion to me. She says I snore too loudly, my breath is bad, I talk too quiet, my jokes are lame. I mean, none of that has ever bothered her before. We’ve been trying to work it out, but she keeps saying she’s through so… I don’t know.” He put his hands up.
Chloe, at a loss for words, repeated. “I’m sorry.”
“That’s life.” He shrugged.
Chloe thought about Wes. “That’s love.”
There was an awkward silence between them as Sharon told a joke and Erin kept interrupting. “You’re telling it all wrong!”
Donny said, “I’m surprised you came back after… everything that happened.”
Chloe made a face at him. “Here’s the thing. I don’t remember what happened.”
Surprised, Donny asked, “Nothing?”
“Nope.” Chloe shook her head. “Some of it’s been coming back to me—in bits and pieces.
Donny said, “Ah, that’s what they meant.”
She said, “Apparently, my Aunt and husband were giving me some drug to make me forget, but I’m not on it anymore. I want to remember now. I’m ready no matter what Wes or my Aunt think.”
Donny gave her a good, hard look. She recognized the gesture. It’s what she often did when figuring out a person in custody.
He said, “I’m not saying what your family did was right, but they’ve kept you from the truth for a good reason. I mean, if my wife had gone through what you had and I could keep her from experiencing that pain? I hate to say this, but I would probably do the same thing.”
Chloe said, “She gave birth to a child, didn’t she? You didn’t choose to take that pain away from her.”
Donny laughed. “Yeah, but that’s different. She chose to have a child. My wife knew what kind of pain she was up against and when the time came, she couldn’t handle the pain. She chose to have an epidural. When all was said and done, we had a baby.
“You didn’t choose what happened all those years ago, Chloe. It was awful. It was so awful you ended up comatose in the hospital. What do you have to gain by remembering, going through all that pain again? Once it starts, I’m guessing there won’t be any relief from it. There won’t be any shots or meds to make it go away. Have you considered that you may end up in the hospital again? Not only would your family not have you, but there’s the financial cost of it. Is it worth losing all that you have and love to regain the past?”
Donny was earnest, honest, and presented a thoughtful point of view. Chloe couldn’t answer his question, at least not yet. “I don’t know.”
Donny’s cell jingled, and he fished it out of the front pocket of his hoodie. “Speak of the devil; it’s my wife.” He chuckled as he texted back. “She wants me to bring by diapers, take-out Thai, and to stay and watch the finale of American Horror Story.”
Chloe smiled. “Sounds like a date.”
He shook his head. “No offense. But I don’t understand women.” Donny said this sarcastically, but there was a glow to his face now that was missing earlier.
Chloe asked, “Anyone I know? Or used to know? Not that I would remember—”
He said, “Kara. I think back then she still went by Kara Leigh, but I doubt you would remember.”
But Chloe did remember. She remembered bouncing blonde curls, the snarl on her perfectly plump lips. The I-will-destroy-you-if-you-come-close-to-Donny look on her face. And then she remembered more. She remembered being on a stage. Naked. The crowd roaring at her. She remembered the cackle of a witch, turning and seeing Kara Leigh, pointing and laughing.
He raised an eyebrow. “Or do you?”
Chloe beamed. “I do, Trooper Hanks. I kicked her ass off the stage once, remember?”
He put a hand over his eyes, trying not to laugh and pointed at Chloe. “Oh, Lord, was that a night.”
Chloe said, “She was a very pretty cheerleader and quite fond of you, too.”
“Uh huh.” He nodded and avoided her eyes. “Everything changed after that night.”
Chloe frowned, remembering. After that, the former head cheerleader had cut her hair, wore long dark sweatshirts and jeans. She’d turned to cutting and cigarettes. Her leg had never quite healed right, and neither had her nose.
/>
“I’m sorry for what I did,” said Chloe, for the third time in the conversation.
He said, “There’s a handful of things I think we’d all change if we could go back. Hey, I thought you said you couldn’t remember anything?”
Chloe shrugged. “It’s coming back in bits and pieces. If there were ever someone to remember, it would be that pretty cheerleader with the perfect legs and hair, who had it out for any girl who dared to steal her boyfriend.”
Donny’s face filled out in a sad smile. “Yes, that’s my Kara all right.”
Erin came up from behind Chloe and locked elbows with her. “Whose Kara?”
Sharon grabbed Chloe’s other arm. “I don’t know a Kara.”
Chloe said, “Donny’s wife.”
And then, they were all walking out the diner door. Donny offered his arm to Diana. She took it and said, “Do you work tonight?”
“Ma’am, midnight shift.”
“You promise to be safe now.”
“Of course.”
Chloe said, “You better get to that Thai food restaurant before it closes.”
He looked at his watch. “Shit. Ten minutes. Catch you guys on Thursday.”
Sharon and Erin said, “Byyyyyyeeeeeeee,” their voices echoing in the misty parking lot. Then they dove into an intense argument about whether fog or snow would create the perfect nunchuck training environment.
Diana put an end to it by asking the twins to bring garlic bread to dinner on Thursday.
They said their goodbyes and separated to their cars.
Chloe warmed the engine and readjusted the rearview mirror while Diana buckled in. She turned up the heater and relaxed in the heat and quiet companionship.
Diana said, “Tonight was good.”
“It was.” Chloe agreed, then asked, “How much has my Aunt told you, Diana?”
“Oh,” she shrugged. “Enough. I’ve encouraged her to tell you herself.”
“Like that is ever going to happen.” Chloe flipped on the lights and pulled away from the curb. When she neared the burned down apartment building, she slowed the vehicle and pointed at where she had seen the clown. Diana rolled down her window, and they inspected the wreckage. The mist had lifted enough so that they could see into the shadows, but after a minute or so, it was obvious no one out there. Chloe continued driving and Diana picked up their conversation where they had left off.