‘What are you three doing out here at this time of night?’ he asked. ‘Who is your owner?’
‘We ain’t got no owners.’ Thea said defiantly with her chin held high.
‘So you’re a group of runaways,’ he said in a low tone. His men raised their guns and began closing in on Thea and Minus, but once again the man holding me raised his hand to stop them. ‘I’m sorry, but if you don’t tell us where you came from, we’ll be forced to shoot you. But I promise you that if you do tell us where you escaped, we will take you back without harming you.’
‘Much,’ one of the other men added, and the man’s troupe began to snicker. I shook free of his hold, and struggled to stand on my own with Thea and Minus.
‘Why should we trust you? Who are you to promise something like that, huh?’ Thea demanded.
‘I’m a Major in the confederate army, I give you my word,’ he said. He took his hat off of his head and ran a hand through his blonde curls, and I was reminded of Mr. Abberdean, with his youth and mannerisms.
I could see the urge to flee, to run away, in Thea’s face. In her mind, being shot was probably the less frightening fate. To return to the governess’ estate would be worse than death. I grabbed her dress and shook my head when I saw her leg twitch, and she locked eyes with me. Within seconds we had our own private conversation that no one else would hear.
‘We’ll go willingly,’ Thea said. I knew the defeat in her face well; I had experienced it earlier that day. The walk back to the mansion was much shorter than the run because none of us wanted to see it again. The major was kind enough to let me ride with him because it was clear that I still couldn’t stand well.
When we arrived, the men were welcomed inside to wait in the dining room while the governess was fetched. Thea, Minus, and I stood next to each other, dreading what was to come. Thea had her eyes closed with one hand clasped over her crucifix, praying in whispers. Minus held her hand and stared ahead with a solid face of bravery.
When the governess’ boots clicked into the room, each soldier stood and took their hats off. She eyed each of us with her one visible eye beneath her veiled face, and her expression was smooth and composed.
‘We caught them about two miles from here in a meadow,’ said the young major.
‘And you brought the slaves back?’ The governess asked. ‘Isn’t there a law that states you must shoot runaway slaves on sight?’
‘It didn’t seem necessary, ma’am,’ the major said. ‘Besides, you would be losing out on good labor and money, wouldn’t you, miss?’
‘I have money, and an excess of help. These two would have been no toll on my conscience,’ the governess said coldly. ‘This one, however, I am grateful for.’
‘Ma’am, I was wondering if you might have enough room for twelve tired and hungry soldiers?’ The major asked politely.
‘Of course, I will have one my servants show you to the east ward, while the kitchen staff makes you something to hold you over until breakfast in the morning,’ she said.
He bowed with thanks, but she paid him no mind. She snatched my wrist and pulled me with her into one of the vast empty halls.
‘Running away now, are we? After everything I’ve done for you, after I was willing to forgive your discrepancies and continue your education, you still chose to spurn me,’ the governess said calmly. It was much scarier when she was calm; she was unpredictable when she wasn't screaming.
But I wasn't going to be so civil.
‘I don’t want your education or your luxuries!’ I screamed audaciously.
‘You’ve made that abundantly clear,’ the governess said, calculating something in her mind as she tapped her finger on her cheek with one of her wicked smiles.
‘Go ahead, put me back in the shed!’ I said stubbornly.
‘No, no, that would get us nowhere,’ the governess said. ‘Go back to your ward and go to sleep. We will discuss your future here in the morning.’
I was at an utter loss for words. I couldn’t believe that after everything I’d done, all of the insolence that I had thrown her way, she was still going to make me go through the lessons and become a debutant belle. I went to bed without argument, though I couldn’t sleep. I laid there for hours, wondering what was to happen to Thea and Minus.
The next morning, Rhoda, Yvette, and I went to breakfast. We were quiet as we sat with the table of noisy and messy soldiers. The only one with any form of manner and composition was the major. He would pass quick glances in my direction now and then from beneath his blonde curls while I stared.
After breakfast, the other girls were off to their own personal tutors, but I was held behind by the governess.
‘Come, let us go for a walk. We have your future to discuss,’ she said.
I complied without argument, mystified. We walked around in silence, and I tried to focus on the warm morning sun on my skin. We walked out into the garden, and I saw horror incarnate before me.
Thea and Minus were tied to two posts with their hands behind their backs. I wanted to run to them, to set them free, and my legs began to carry me, but the governess held my shoulder with bruising strength.
The horror intensified when I watched the soldiers file out of the kitchen and into the garden, each with their rifles in hand. The major walked toward us without enthusiasm, and there was a sadness in his eyes that dragged his pace down.
‘Ma’am, on your word,’ he said. ‘I’d like to make it a point to say one last time that it isn’t necessary to uphold the law in this case. No one would know if you let them live.’
‘I do not keep ungrateful slaves in my household, major, my mind is set,’ Governess Bathory said indifferently. ‘Tell your men to fire when ready.’
The major bowed and turned, lifting his arm. The troupe lifted their rifles as they knelt, taking aim and waiting. I kept glancing between Thea and Minus, and the firing squad of eleven men. Thea was staring up into the sky, crying, while Minus stared ahead of him, his resolve written clearly across his fearless expression.
‘Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil,’ Thea began to pray out loud.
‘Please, stop!’ I screamed, fighting against the governess’ hold, but she squeezed my shoulder harder, and the pain brought me to my knees.
‘Ready!’ the major called out.
‘For you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.’ Thea continued.
‘Aim!’
‘Please, stop,’ I sobbed, much quieter this time as I heaved uncontrollably.
‘Mama, protect us,’ Thea cried out to the sky.
‘Please,’ I begged the major again. ‘Don’t do this.’
He glanced over his shoulder pitifully, his arm still raised in the air. I clutched his boot and begged him over and over again to stop, but all he offered was a silent apology.
‘It is the law, Major Hansen,’ The governess pressed.
He turned away, and I stared, powerless, as he dropped his arm. The silent command was instantaneous, and lightning cracked throughout the garden.
Of all the colors in the garden, blue, violet, yellow, white, and green, nothing stood out more than the streaks of crimson as the muskets tore violently through their bodies and sprayed nature with the gruesome sight of blood. Thea cried out in hair-raising agony, but Minus was silent as he had taken a few shots to the face; he died almost instantly.
I finally understood why the governess was going to allow me to stay in her home. In her eyes I had cost her two slaves, and I was to replace them. I was not going to live there with the hope of becoming a belle, a true lady; I was going to work off my debt to her as her salve.
I sat there for a while, even after the soldiers and the governess left the garden, watching as Thea's life slowly bled from her eyes. When the sun was at its highest peak, I ventured out into the blood garden at their feet and touched Thea to see if she was truly dead.
She was.
I took her crucifi
x to remember her, and offered my own silent prayer as I faced my life in servitude, never to see my home, my sisters, Abby, or Mr. Abberdean again. I had so much hope only one day ago, and my life held so much promise. Now I was staring into a void of black nothing.
My childhood died that day.
The child, too, had been sacrificed by night’s end when my day ended with a pair of scissors against my scalp. My dreams fell to the floor with dead locks. Love left when I saw my near bald head in the mirror.
I was shattered, empty, and broken.
4. Changeling
Brush, work, eat, brush, sleep. Brush, work, eat, brush, sleep. Brush, work, eat, brush, sleep.
My life was a cycle of grueling and laborious repetition, but I had to keep my hair brushed, straight and untangled if I wanted to keep it at all. My locks were finally past my shoulders again, and I intended to keep it that way.
No matter how dull my existence was, I had something wonderful to look forward to on this most joyous evening.
Tonight was another one of the governess’ monthly dinner parties. Tonight was also my seventeenth birthday, and both Rhoda and Yvette said that they had something planned for me. When I helped them get dressed for the occasion, in which Yvette would be a debutant presented to high society, they would ‘present my present’, as Rhoda put it.
They had both grown so much, and Yvette was definitely going to be a heartbreaker. Unlike quiet Rhoda, Yvette needed to be the center of attention and would take drastic measures, even when unnecessary, to ensure that all eyes were on her. And when Yvette caught sight of the men in governess Bathory’s circle she would, without a doubt, swoon on the spot.
I had seen the kind of people in Elizabeth Bathory’s circle. They were all young and beautiful, statuesque and irresistible, and even though they all looked down on me when I waited on them, hand and foot, I didn’t mind. I liked to stand in the corner and simply gaze.
However, one doesn’t serve their kind for three years and not suspect anything. I knew that they were more than human, of this I was dead certain, and I knew that they were dangerous. But so long as I kept my mouth shut and gazed like the mindless servant girl that they thought me to be, I was safe enough to stare and observe them.
In fact, after a while, one got used to their initially creepy air. Even their deep red eyes, which they all shared, became less daunting as the months went by. I wasn’t sure what they were, or even if they were creatures of god or the devil himself, but it was a coexistence that had a delicate balance, and I needed to make sure that I didn’t tip the scales in either direction.
‘It’s funny,’ Yvette pondered as she watched me lace her gown in the mirror. ‘This is something that I’ve dreamed of since I was a little girl, and now that I’m sixteen and finally about to enter this glorified world of men and manners, I don’t feel like I belong. As though everything I’ve done for the last three years has taken me further away from the things that I want. The problem is that I don’t exactly know what I want. Do you ever feel that way, Wilhelmina?’
‘I used to,’ I mused. ‘But somehow you get over it. You realize that this is the life you've been given, and the only way you'll survive it is to accept the hand dealt to you. I guess it’s just wisdom, it comes to us all in our own time.’
‘That doesn’t sound like wisdom, Wilhelmina; it sounds like you’ve given up,’ Yvette said sadly.
‘Please, no pity; I endure quite well, thank you,’ I said. I took in her exceptional beauty. ‘You look gorgeous.’
‘All thanks to you,’ she said as she turned to face me. She held my hands and drew in a deep breath. ‘I’ve never been so nervous about anything in all of my life.’
‘Breathing helps with the nerves,’ I laughed as she giggled. ‘So does knowing that you will be the most stunning young woman in that room. And I’ll be right there when you need me.’
‘Thank you Wilhelmina,’ she said, accepting my assurance for what it was. She embraced me, gently, and quickly rush off to the governess’ den for the woman’s approval. I stayed behind, smiling to myself as I the memory of her timidity linger. I studied myself in the mirror, and wondered how my life could have been different than it is now.
My face was still round, but had grown longer. It was more like a cat’s expression, with full lips, and wide eyes resting on my curved cheeks. My hair fell in long fiery waves behind my back, and I pulled my rag of a dress tightly behind me to accent my curvatures and pivots.
I saw myself wearing a forest green dress, much like the one I owned in my life back in Fremont - before my step-mother disowned me, and my sister Mary seemed to vanish off of the face of the planet.
I looked around before I proceeded with my next bold move. A grin spread across my lips, and I giggled quietly before I ruffled my hands through my hair wildly and let it fly and swirl all around my head. It streaked over my face, but my eyes were still visible, staring back at me from under my mane. It gave me a sense of strength, of pride and prowess.
‘Don’t let the governess catch you,’ Rhoda said as she ran inside the ward. She quickly jumped onto her bed and crawled under her bed sheets. The thirteen year old was obviously hiding something, probably more bugs she’d caught in the garden.
‘Don’t let the governess catch you,’ I said, combing my hair back and working out the fresh kinks. ‘You know how she feels about insects, she despises them.’ I sat the comb down and snuck up to her bed. ‘And if she caught you she would pounce!’ And so I did, jumping on the bed and shocking her with my impressive dexterity. I thought it was rather impressive, anyway.
‘And fire would shoot from her nostrils!’ Rhoda laughed.
‘Would it?’
Our ominous eavesdropper stood in the doorway, veiled in black as usual. Rhoda froze beneath my hands, and I crawled off of the bed and straightened out my dress.
‘Governess Bathory,’ I bowed, looking at my feet as she drew near. The air literally became colder when she walked by, toting Yvette behind her.
‘This gown is not laced properly; I would think that you would’ve put more care into the job.’ The governess said sharply. 'After all, your own sister is going to experience the most important moment of her life.'
Yvette silently stepped forward with an apologetic glance, but I understood.
‘I assure you, mistress, I did not intend to rush through the task.’
‘Rhoda, run along,’ said the governess.
Rhoda climbed out slowly, eyes fixed on the floor and away from the face that haunted her dreams most nights. The girl ghosted her way around us until the governess gripped her shoulder.
‘And take those insufferable creatures with you. The next time that I suspect them in my home you will be the one to suffer the consequences.’
Rhoda quickly grabbed the mason jar beneath her sheets and rushed out the door. I got to work on the meticulous task of untying the tight threads on the dress and felt sorry for Yvette. I knew that the gown was laced properly and was more tight enough for any human girl to endure, but now the governess was simply out for blood. Yvette had probably done something miniscule to upset her.
‘I am impressed, Wilhelmina,’ the governess said as she studied my every movement. ‘Yvette is going to experience a grandeur moment in her life, something that you, too, could have experienced under... different circumstances. Yet, knowing full well that this moment is forever out of your grasp, you have been gracious with every step of the way.’
My, wasn’t she gracious this evening?
‘I understand my place, governess. And I am happy for Yvette.’ I really was.
‘For the first time, since you'd stepped in this mansion, I see a tamed girl,’ she said calculatingly. ‘Only when you have been completely broken and restrained can you be disciplined and turned into something of value.’
‘Forgive me, governess, but I don’t quite understand your meaning,’ I said, trying to concentrate on my duty instead of her piercing words, or poor Yvette�
��s whimpers as I used every ounce of strength I had.
‘No, you wouldn’t,’ she commented. She smirked when I yanked the laces one final time and tied them off. ‘Splendid work, Wilhelmina; she can hardly breathe.’
They left in silence and I wished that I had something to throw across the room. But I had places to be. I needed to get dressed and make myself presentable for governess Bathory’s peculiar guests. Besides, I didn’t want to miss one single moment of Yvette’s presentation.
As I made my way to the dining room, where I was expected shortly as the sun had set moments ago, I was abruptly stopped by one of the children from the kitchen.
‘Wilhelmina!’ Henrietta was one of the yard slaves' daughters. She worked in the kitchen doing odd jobs like dish washing. At eleven years old she was headstrong, and obstinate, which was probably why I enjoyed her company so much.
‘You should be in the kitchen. If any of the guests saw you wandering about, the governess would put you in the garden shed,’ I warned her.
‘I just wanted to say happy birthday,’ she said. ‘I told my mama and Thomasine and they have a surprise for you later when you come to the kitchen.’
‘They didn’t,’ I smiled humorously.
‘They did; they made you a cake. But you didn’t hear it from me,’ she said. She ran off and vanished around the corner, and I continued on my course to the dining room.
Once there, I noticed a few of the guests early tonight, but the governess was still nowhere to be seen. I silently drifted to a corner as they stared, unblinkingly. I knew two of the four by name; an ashy brown skinned woman named Rosa from Texas and a platinum blonde man named Francis were seated casually in chairs at the table, while two others lingered loosely.
‘Really? Left the Trenners' for that sort of lifestyle?’ Francis asked one of other men. ‘And all he has to go on is a theory, you say?’
‘Madness where there needn’t be, that’s what I say; let the blood pour and let us be the instinctive creatures we were meant to be!’ The dark haired man replied. The third man was new. I hadn’t seen him here before in the three years I'd been waiting at these monthly soirees, but he seemed particularly interested in me as he stared, cocking his head as though I were a puzzle to be solved. He had light brown cropped hair, and eyes as black as onyx.
Wilhelmina A Novella Page 5