by Peter Styles
Wyatt was trapped in his own head, trying to understand what had just happened. Why in the world was Roland offering him a job? He already had one, and it was one he had gone through six years of school to get. For the remainder of the meeting, Wyatt sat in silence, only picking at his dessert. He couldn’t be happier when people finally began to stand from the table and move to the door. Wyatt was quick to follow suit, standing up from his chair. Lincoln glanced up at him curiously, but stood as well and wrapped an arm around him. But, much to Wyatt’s dismay, they didn’t follow the others out. Lincoln stopped to talk to some that still lingered in the conference room. Wyatt stepped away from Lincoln. “I’m going to step out for a smoke. Excuse me,” he muttered, quickly walking away.
He didn’t bother to stick around to hear any objections. Instead, he beelined for the door. Moving around the people who lingered in little clusters, he found his way downstairs and out of the building. Putting a cigarette between his lips, he leaned against the building and took a deep drag. His mind was running in vicious circles, trying to understand the meaning behind everything. Was Wyatt just reading too much into it? Maybe it was all innocent and kind, but something just felt… shady.
It wasn’t like he thought Lincoln was purposefully trying to exploit him and their relationship, but maybe he was in his subconscious. Oh, he could already hear Lincoln’s response if he were to bring it up. I thought this is what you wanted. You asked for this. You cornered me into this. It wasn’t at all what Wyatt wanted. He didn’t want to be Lincoln’s employee or coworker; Wyatt only wanted to be his boyfriend. Wyatt was fine being in videos and pictures when it was genuine, but not when it was forced. Making him an employee felt like they were going to force the “gay agenda”—the exact thing they had been trying to avoid. Maybe they were all just blind to how it looked because they were so happy with the success of the videos. Which was understandable, but it didn’t make it right.
Clearly, Wyatt hadn’t thought all of this through. Maybe he should have made it a point to not be involved in his work. Then again, Lincoln’s life was his job. It would be almost impossible to date him and not be in the content of it. If they hadn’t have made it abundantly obvious that they were together though, people would have just speculated and dug around until they found something to prove they were together. Then they would be in the exact same situation as they were currently in. Ugh, his head was starting to hurt.
Just as he stubbed his cigarette out, the door to the office opened. Out walked Lincoln along with some of his colleagues. Lincoln’s eyes fell on Wyatt, and his face brightened. Walking over to him, Lincoln put a hand on the small of his back. “Hey, we were going to go get some drinks. Wanna come along?”
Wyatt’s stomach knotted. He had too much on his mind and, if he went, Lincoln would think he was just sour. “Actually, I kind of wanted to head home.”
Lincoln’s face fell, a frown coming to his lips. “Oh? Are you feeling okay?”
“I’m fine. I’m just tired,” Wyatt lied, looking to the sidewalk beneath them.
His frown deepened, “I see. Do you want to sleep at my place? I can drive you there before heading out.”
“I want to go to my place, if that’s okay.”
Lincoln’s look then grew skeptical, his eyes taking in every detail of Wyatt’s face to try and decode the meaning behind his words and requests. “Alright…”
“I can just get an Uber. I don’t want to make you miss any time with your friends or anything.”
“No, I’ll drive you,” Lincoln said, firmly. Looking over to the group he had walked out with, he waved to them, “I’ll meet you guys there.” Then, Lincoln headed to the parking garage with Wyatt.
They walked in silence, a tense air surrounding the both of them. Wyatt could tell that Lincoln was waiting for him to say something, but Wyatt really didn’t even know how to go about voicing his concerns. He was afraid to bring it up; afraid that Lincoln would either shut down or get pissed off. Really, he didn’t want to deal with either of those outcomes. He didn’t want to fight, he really did want to go home and have some time to think about it before trying to bring it up. When they got to Lincoln’s car, Wyatt climbed in and rested his head against his window.
When Wyatt’s head touched the glass, Lincoln spoke suddenly, “What’s going on with you?”
His tone hadn’t been aggressive or mad, but urgent and concerned. Guilt bit at Wyatt’s stomach. Did he even have anything to be upset about? Wyatt didn’t want to lie to Lincoln either. It always blew up in Wyatt’s face, even when he told little white lies. He rubbed his hand down the side of his face, letting out a weighted sigh. “I’ve just got some stuff on my mind, I’m sorry. I just wanna go home, relax, and try and clear my head.”
Lincoln’s hand squeezed Wyatt’s knee gently. “You know you can talk to me, don’t you? Whatever is going on, you can tell me…”
Wyatt nibbled on his lip, staying silent as he tried to figure out what to say. He had really hoped that Lincoln would leave it alone after what he said so that Wyatt wouldn’t be cornered into either lying or telling the full truth. “I don’t really want to talk about it right now. I don’t want to say something I don’t mean, or say something wrong.”
“Wait, it’s about me?” Lincoln questioned, his brow coming together. “Did I do something wrong?”
Way to put my foot in my mouth, Wyatt mused mentally. “No, it’s not that you did anything wrong, per se. Please, I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
“If I did something wrong, I want to be able to fix it. I don’t want you going home, sleeping on it, and growing to resent me. That’s not how it should work. Please, just tell me what’s bothering you so that we can work on it,” Lincoln persisted. He hadn’t even turned the car on yet. They were sat in his parked car with Wyatt staring out the window, and Lincoln staring at him.
Wyatt groaned, putting his forehead in his hand. “I see where you are coming from, I get it. I’m not mad at you, but I am confused. And I want to sort myself out before causing drama over nothing.”
“Well, you’re causing drama by not telling me what’s going on…” Lincoln rebutted.
Oh, Wyatt wanted to scream. If not for anything else but to get out his frustration. He didn’t like being cornered into talking about his emotions. However, Wyatt knew a time or two he had cornered Lincoln when they were friends with benefits. It wouldn’t be fair for him to dish what he couldn’t take. From deep down in his bones, Wyatt didn’t want to start a fight. It seemed like no matter which option he chose though, there was going to potentially be a negative reaction. His best bet was trying to explain himself, but as carefully as he could. “Okay, fine… Just… I don’t even know if I’m really upset about it. It just made me feel a little off, you know?” Wyatt began, still trying to piece together his thoughts. “I got a little weirded out on the hike when Marcus asked us to kiss. Only because we had talked so much about not pushing the fact that you’re gay, and to force affection for a picture felt like it was going against that. But I didn’t want to say anything because I thought I was overanalyzing... Then Roland announced he was offering me a job, and it just made it feel like my earlier feelings were kind of vindicated in a way.”
Lincoln’s face scrunched, “Sweetheart, he was offering you a job because the video did so well. And you said you wanted to be a part of my work—”
“I never said I wanted to be a part of it. I said that I didn’t want to be hidden, and I knew being in your life would mean some level of exposure. So I was okay with it, and I am happy to be a part of your ‘coming out story’…”
“Now you think I’m using you for gay clickbait?” Lincoln snapped.
Wyatt hedged for a moment, even though he knew even the pause was a mistake. Lincoln’s jaw immediately clenched and he turned the ignition. “Come on, Linc. You know I don’t think that you’re doing that purposefully…”
“But I am doing it?”
He groaned out
of frustration, “This is why I didn’t want to talk about it. I don’t know what I think, Lincoln. Things just felt a little weird to me this evening. While I don’t think you are necessarily doing anything on purpose, or maybe not at all, I got a little worried it was happening on a subconscious level. Since the video did so well and brought in money and business, it makes sense to want to do more material like it. And no matter how it comes about, I don’t want to be involved in selling sexuality as a product or something. Do you know what I mean?” Wyatt burned holes into the side of Lincoln’s head as Lincoln drove down the city roads, albeit a little too fast. Surely some part of him had to understand where Wyatt was coming from.
“Honestly, I don’t know what you mean. You were a part of every process that you have been involved in. Just because a photographer asked us to kiss, which he would have done to any couple, gay or straight, you start to sabotage what we are building. It really upsets me and kind of pisses me off. You’ve been all this big talk about me being shamed and needing to be out there, to just let you in. I let you in, I let you in my work, and then just a few days into the relationship, you’re nitpicking to try and find reasons to be mad. It’s like you want to be pissed off with me,” Lincoln ranted, clearly getting more and more worked up as he went on. “All because I fucking kissed you. Really?”
“God-fucking-damnit!” Wyatt exclaimed, his patience running out. “I just told you twice that I hadn’t wanted to talk about it, because I didn’t know how I felt. I knew this would happen if I tried to bring it up. All I wanted was some time alone to calm down and think about it objectively. But no. You backed me into a corner to tell you, and now you’re pissed at me for telling you. Do you see how insane that is?”
“What do you think would have happened if you had time alone? You would have stewed in it, analyzing it even more and just vindicating the assumptions you already have. We need to talk about this—”
“Are we talking about it, or are you yelling at me for expressing my thoughts?” Wyatt interjected.
Lincoln’s jaw clenched again, his hands visibly clutching the steering wheel. “Now you are the one not being fair.”
“How in the fuck am I not being fair?!” Wyatt spat. “This is all such bullshit, and you know it. You’re just getting defensive because you know you’re acting like a dick.”
“Am I?” Lincoln asked, his voice oozing with condescension.
“Fuck off, Linc,” Wyatt muttered, sinking in his seat and crossing his arms over his chest. There was nothing then but thick tension and silence. Both men radiated frustration and anger. As soon as the car pulled up to the curb, Wyatt whipped off his seatbelt and opened the door, “Have fun drinking,” he spat. Wyatt then got out of the car and slammed the door closed. Before he could even get to the front door of his building, Lincoln’s tires squealed as he sped away. “What an ass,” Wyatt muttered to himself, shaking his head and going into his building.
Chapter 13: Partisan Partner
Lincoln had been right, all Wyatt did was fester in his own thoughts all night. However, it was the fight Wyatt couldn’t shake. Had he been in the wrong? Would it have been better just to lie to Lincoln? Wyatt hadn’t come to any sort of conclusion even though he stayed up for hours going over it again and again. He ended up having to dip into his stash of marijuana just to fall asleep.
From exhaustion and his stupor, Wyatt slept soundly. He didn’t stir until his phone began to buzz on his nightstand. He didn’t have to look to know who it was. Answering the call without bothering to open his eyes, he pressed the phone to his cheek. “Hello?” he croaked.
“Morning,” Lincoln greeted. “Would you come to breakfast with me?”
Wyatt was surprised that Lincoln sounded so calm and wanted to see him since things had been so volatile last night. “Uh, yeah sure.”
“Can you meet me at Le Doux Matin in a half hour?”
That was the French restaurant they had met at when they officially started dating. A phantom smile came to Wyatt’s lips, “Yeah.”
They said their goodbyes and hung up. Wyatt requested an Uber before tossing his phone to the side. Letting out a groan, he pulled himself from the bed. He really wouldn’t ever get used to early mornings, he was such a night owl. Wyatt dragged his tired bones into the bathroom and tried to take a quick shower. It was hard for him not to dilly dally, the hot water practically lulling him back to sleep. He managed to keep it short though, getting out and drying off before going into his room. It wasn’t until he was pulling on a pair of skinny jeans that he remembered it was a really nice restaurant. Wyatt paused, trying to debate on what to wear. Honest to God, he didn’t want to wear his suit. Therefore, Wyatt decided to dress a little more casually, putting on his skinny jeans and a floral button up. He rolled the sleeves to his elbows and buttoned the shirt all the way to the collar. His phone buzzed, and Wyatt cursed under his breath. Wyatt scrambled to put on his shoes and grab his necessities before rushing out the door.
It wasn’t a long ride to the restaurant, but long enough to get his mind reeling once again. A jolt of panic rushed through him. What if Lincoln wanted to meet there to break up? You’re getting ahead of yourself again, he tried to reason. There was nothing pointing to Lincoln wanting to break up. Yeah, they had a fight, but surely Lincoln had more patience than that. He had come out as gay for Wyatt, and so Wyatt needed to give Lincoln a little more credit. Still, that couldn’t stop his knee from bouncing from the nerves.
When the car pulled up to the restaurant, Wyatt stepped out and headed toward the door. Before he could grasp the door handle, a hand appeared on it and pulled it open for him. “After you,” the familiar voice cooed. Wyatt glanced up to see Lincoln towering over him. Giving a weak smile, Wyatt walked into the building. Lincoln followed him in and walked over to the host. “Reservation for Prescott,” Lincoln stated. The host didn’t have to bother looking at the list, giving a bright smile and guided them into the dining room. They were sat by the window and given their menus. Wyatt ordered a coffee as soon as the waiter approached, and Lincoln asked for one as well.
Once the waiter walked away, there was only silence. Wyatt glanced up to see Lincoln already looking at him. How were they supposed to begin? What was even the purpose of meeting up? Did Lincoln want to apologize, or was he expecting Wyatt to? “So, how did getting drinks with the guys go?” he asked, as politely as he could.
“I didn’t go,” Lincoln stated, simply. “I needed to be by myself.”
“Oh, did you?” Wyatt remarked, sarcastically. “I wouldn’t know the feeling at all.”
“I know I look like a hypocrite,” he muttered. Before he could continue, the waiter arrived with their coffees. He then took their orders and walked away. “Look, I’m sorry that I forced you to talk to me last night. That wasn’t fair. I was afraid of it turning into something bigger if we didn’t squash it.”
“No, I get why you were persistent,” Wyatt responded, wanting to meet him halfway. Wyatt hadn’t exactly handled things well either. “I know they always say not to go to bed angry, but it seems that’s what we did. I wasn’t mad before all that. I really was confused.”
“I know, I know. I shouldn’t have snapped at you for all that. You’re allowed to have your own emotions. But… I hope you understand that I wouldn’t ever purposefully exploit us. I’m not that guy.”
Wyatt tried his best not to let his frustration bubble to the surface. Lincoln was sweet, but still a little thickheaded. “Like I said last night, I never thought you would purposefully do anything like that. I was afraid that your coworkers might be, or maybe all doing it subconsciously. It just felt off, and it worried me.”
Lincoln reached across the table and took one of Wyatt’s hands in his. His thumb rubbed light circles into Wyatt’s knuckles. “I get that. You aren’t used to my group yet, so I shouldn’t expect you to trust them. This world is new to you… I don’t want the small things that happened yesterday to chase you away from it. There real
ly isn’t any ill will. We aren’t going to turn you into a circus monkey or anything. Like you said, things should flow naturally. And I’ll talk to everyone to reinforce that.”
Wyatt smiled softly, his own thumb gently brushing across Lincoln’s fingers as they held hands. “Well, thank you. That does make me feel better. I’m sorry I made such a big deal about it…”
“It’s alright. If I put myself in your shoes, I get where that could have been a red flag. It’s hard for me to think outside of my own perspective sometimes,” Lincoln said wearily, his other hand rubbing the back of his neck.
“It’s understandable though. You’re constantly consumed by your job. I see how it would be hard to separate yourself from it.” They sat there quietly, smiling to themselves and holding hands. As Wyatt got lost in his thoughts, he let out a small chuckle.
“What is it?” Lincoln asked, his smile brightening.
“Nothing really. Just how eloquently you handled our first official fight. Granted, there wasn’t much grace in acting like a dick and speeding off last night. The fact you calmed down, invited me to a French café for breakfast, and apologized like an adult… Definitely a level of class I’ve never experienced before,” Wyatt explained, still chuckling to himself.
Lincoln smirked, “And how did fights normally end for you before me?”
“Normally a drunken ‘baby, I’m sorry,’ and then sloppy makeup sex.”
“I wouldn’t be opposed to the latter,” he cooed, wiggling his brow.
Wyatt laughed, shaking his head, “Keep dreaming, Mr. Prescott.”
Their food came and they enjoyed their meal, exchanging playful banter all the while. Wyatt was blown away by the cuisine there. It was so decadent, he wished to have it for every meal. Once their plates were cleared from the table, they sat together, holding hands and drinking coffee. For once, it seemed like neither of them were in a rush. It was nice to sit and actually enjoy conversation between one another, rather than always being on the go.