I met them at the car and Mr. Parks explained the rest as we drove. My dad had taken a sudden trip to Costa Rica. He left this morning along with a CIA agent traveling with my passport. Mr. Parks said that us leaving should be enough of a diversion for the government not to watch us board Sanctuary.
A similar boat was already waiting in the channel at the marina to take our place. From an overhead satellite, they would look the same. On shore, we would be supported by the Pentagon and Bolling Air Force Base—monitored by the factions within the government and military that had already converted their support to Sunrise. I was stunned by how much was in motion.
We drove into the marina and I saw Helga standing with a man near the boat. “Leave the car running. He will take it back to Reid’s,” Mr. Parks instructed. We all got out of the car. The man was in a Mariner’s Point polo shirt, khaki shorts, and brown leather Top-Siders. He blended in almost too well.
“Hi there! Enjoy being out on the water. Nice day for it,” he said, holding the door for Reid. I had seen this man before but I couldn’t place where. Was he a friend of my dad’s? I didn’t have time to consider it. Mr. Parks was in a rush.
As we crossed the grass toward the boat, I hoped Mr. Parks was right. He said this situation was temporary until Dr. West’s funeral. If all went well, I would be back in school on Wednesday and ready for our field hockey game on Friday. I didn’t ask what would happen if all did not go well. My sixteenth birthday was on Monday. A week ago, I would have never expected it to be so irrelevant.
Helga had climbed aboard and was in the cabin. I wondered why we were taking Sanctuary. Didn’t they think that was obvious to take Reid’s boat? The answer was apparent as soon as Reid and I went up to the fly deck and he turned on the depth finder. He never used it and I assumed it was because he knew the river as well as I did. That was not the case. The depth finder was a high tech surveillance and security system.
Mr. Parks was in the cabin with Helga. He came up to the fly deck in a complete disguise. Helga followed soon after. They looked like a ridiculous retired couple. Mr. Parks was wearing a captain’s hat and aviator sunglasses while Helga had on a wide-brimmed visor and a loud floral print shirt. She had on red Sally Jesse Raphael sunglasses that covered up most of her face.
“Reid, you will start teaching Whitney. In the master suite you will find what you need. Go below.” Mr. Parks was so serious I didn’t laugh at his disguise. He took the wheel and Helga settled in next to him. She had a pair of binoculars around her neck. They were both unnervingly quiet. Reid and I did as we were told.
The boat’s master suite was luxurious. It was paneled in glossy teak wood with everything neatly stowed in the built-in drawers. I loved the cleverness of the design and how securely the latches worked. The bed had a navy comforter with white piping. The four white pillows were overstuffed down and a smaller pillow had a monogrammed script of Sanctuary in navy. The swinging brass arm lamps by the bed had white shades.
On the bed were two folded piles of white satin clothing appropriate for tai chi practice. The coat had white frog buttons and a mandarin collar and the loose pants had an elastic waist. I knew the importance of wearing proper clothing as a sign of respect to the martial art, teacher, and student. It also showed dedication and commitment.
“Go ahead. Let me know when you’ve changed. Unless you need help,” Reid said with a note of hopefulness.
“I’ve got this. I’ve been getting dressed on my own for years,” I said, closing the door in his face. I slipped easily into the satin clothes. I saw two long silk strips on Reid’s pile. I opened the door and Reid came back in to the room.
“What are these for?” I asked suspiciously, holding up the black strips of fabric.
“Relax, they are just blindfolds. I will need one so I can’t read your eyes and you will need one to find true center. Plus, I think Mr. Parks wants us to use them as a sign of trust.”
“You don’t trust me?” I asked in a shocked tone. He smirked. I couldn’t blame him. I was constantly tricking him. “I’ve turned over a new leaf, I swear.”
“Uh-huh. I guess I’ll be able to be the judge of that in a few minutes. Remember, we are working. We have seventy-two hours to make you invincible to some of the best minds in the world. It is hard to know who will come to Dr. West’s funeral, but I am sure plenty of them will be trying to pick you apart to find out what you are capable of or if it is all a myth. We want them to see a sad high school girl with absolutely no psychic gifts. There can be no hint of anything else.”
“Got it. Let’s get started.” I held up my black strip of fabric for him to tie around my eyes. He led me to the bed and I sat down. He waited a second and then undid my ponytail. I resisted the urge to protest and let him lead for a change.
“Can you see anything?” he asked. I shook my head. He could check easily enough by touching my shoulder. I heard him taking off his clothes and changing. My ears were paying close attention now that I lost my vision.
Reid began to explain how to use the chi force to close the third eye and to maximize the many different levels of chi. Chi is the “energy flow” of your body. It is literally translated as your breath. All levels of chi together form the dan tian, or total energy source a person has in the body.
Harnessing an energy force is difficult to describe. Reid painted a visual picture of imagining the dan tian as a glowing ball of energy—like the sun. In order to close my dan tian, I would need to focus on a cloud darkening the ball of energy. This would be how I could close off my mind, or what Mr. Parks referred to as darkening my third eye.
A third eye may have other names, like chakra, but it is always located in the same place: just above the eyebrows in the center of the head. This is the entrance to the gate that leads to higher consciousness. Right now, I was aware that my gate was wide open. I was eager to learn how to close it.
Reid instructed me to meditate and to concentrate on my breathing. Soon I was able to clear my mind of all thought. My breathing pattern became a rhythm and that led my muscles into complete relaxation. It helped that we were on the water and Reid was close to me. It served to reduce the interference I usually picked up from the air.
Reid touched me clinically on the shoulders. It was impersonal and remote.
“First, let’s start with happiness. Think of some happy memories and, when I tell you, try and block them by closing the third eye. Do not replace them with another thought. If you don’t seal off the third eye, I will still be able to see what you are trying to hide. It slows me down, but does not stop me.”
I remembered times at the beach with my dad. This time I felt it when Reid connected to my mind but I could not block him. I had a new appreciation for why Reid had trouble explaining it to me. It was something you had to learn by doing yourself. I knew this was going to take practice.
“Again,” he commanded. This time I thought about breaking swim records with Blair, and he was in my mind with ease. My frustration was rising. I could feel his doubt that I would be able to master this skill.
“Again,” he commanded. This time, his voice had a challenging edge to it. As I began to work harder to block him, I had to let go of controlling the memory I selected to represent happiness. I couldn’t do both. In order to be able to learn how to block Reid, I had to trust him completely. I now understood the blindfold. It made me feel less self-conscious as Reid went deeper and deeper into my feelings.
I stopped censoring my memories. Reid began to glimpse the things in life that made me extremely happy. Things that I kept private—like memories of my mother. I was mentally taxing myself and my eyes squinted with concentration.
He shifted through memories until he began to see images of himself. As soon as I saw one of the memories of him emerge in my mind, I fought hard to block him. It was something I did not want him to know. I could feel myself pushing to close the eye. It was extremely difficult. I could feel my entire body shaking with the effort.
> Reid let go of my shoulders and I relaxed. “That was an excellent first try. Lay down and I will show you the three energy centers and the meridians they run along through the body. You need to focus the most on the chong mai, the meridian that runs through the center of the body. It starts here, at the third eye.” I felt Reid’s finger touch lightly on the middle of my forehead.
Then his hands pressed down at the center of my chest. “This is the seat of breath and chi. The three treasures are chi, jing, and shen—mind, body, and spirit. Mr. Parks says you refine the jing to create chi; refine chi to create shen; refine shen and return to the void. In other words: to develop your mind, pay attention to the body; to develop your spirit, pay attention to the mind.” His voice sounded far away. In my mind, I was floating.
Finally, he placed his hands firmly beneath my naval. He explained this location was the vital force gate and the seat of essence. All three energy centers need to work in harmony and my goal was to harness the power of the three energy centers and circulate my inner power to close my third eye.
Reid traced the path of the energy circulating properly through my body. I let my mind become unhinged and through the distance of my deep meditation, I heard him tell me to let the energy flow more freely from my head. My control there was clogging the energy. It was like bursting a dam.
Mentally, I sank deeper and deeper until I felt as if I was on the bottom of the ocean. I had never been at this level of meditation before and it was quiet and peaceful. My breathing was slow and I felt heavy. I could hear Reid’s voice but not what he was saying. I had gone deeper than relaxed awareness. I had returned to the void. It was peaceful oblivion.
I felt his presence as he connected to my mind. Now I could feel where he was going. I felt more powerful this time as he tried the different doors to my subconscious. I was able to lock them until he arrived at fear. I could feel panic rising as he pushed the door open. I did not want him to see all frightening images I had stored there. He was already seeing my terror of being hooked up to the machines at NSIC, the impending threat of nuclear war against the Soviet Union, the fear that so many people depended on me and that I was not good enough. I was scrambling.
Then I could feel him moving toward finding out all my fears about him. He was moving nimbly through the wreckage of my subconscious to get to them as I was gathering strength to block him. I could not let him have that information. I was already painfully exposed but that made me too vulnerable.
It didn’t feel like moving a cloud in front of the sun. It felt like pushing an enormous boulder in front of the opening of a cave. I felt a burst of energy that channeled my strength and the boulder began to move. I insisted and pulled the energy through my body. My heart rate climbed and the exertion was immense. The wobbling boulder finally toppled and the entrance was walled off. I did it. I felt myself return to consciousness and I was glad to be lying flat on the bed. Otherwise, I would have fallen.
I had no more energy left. Reid undid the blindfold and I blinked in the harsh light. “Let me see your eyes,” he said gently. I focused on his face and became grounded again. “I am here,” he said. The fatigue and emotion were a lot to process. I felt tears welling in my eyes. It seemed to be the only expression I could manage. It was the feeling of release when there was nothing left to hide.
My spirit and mind needed to be grounded. I needed a physical sensation and without thinking I grabbed Reid’s satin shirt and pulled him toward me. I kissed him in a way I had never kissed him before.
It was an emotional need. My mind filled with patterns of color and dazzling light. I felt whole again except this time it was in reality. It was a feeling of joy and freedom. I felt like I was soaring and I was taking Reid with me.
“Reid, I hope you have done the work that warrants this reward,” Mr. Parks said from the open doorway. I plummeted back to Earth as if my wings had been clipped.
“She did it. I can’t believe it, but she did it,” Reid said, sitting up. I had never seen his face so red. Some of the buttons on his coat had somehow come undone. Had I done that?
“Good. Just in time for lunch. See you in the galley,” Mr. Parks directed, and walked away.
Reid took a shower before meeting us for lunch. I sat at the table and felt too tired to hold a conversation. I would have almost felt too tired to eat if Helga had not already fixed me a large plate of her pasta salad. She set it in front of me. It reminded me that I was extremely hungry. Reid sat down beside me. I noticed the goose bumps on his arm. His shower must have been ice cold.
Mr. Parks cleared his throat. “This process is not only hard for you, Whitney. Finding the Way is a spiritual and emotional path for both the teacher and the student. Each experience is very different. Reid must put duty before all else.”
Reid spoke back in Chinese. Mr. Parks nodded.
“You both know I hate that, right?” I said to both of them.
“Yes, we know,” Reid said with a smirk. “Believe me, if there was a way around it I would do it. I don’t need any more claw marks on my back.”
“Reid, Whitney is right. That is rude.” Helga aligned with me. I gave her an appreciative glance. I saw the blue blurred lines of a serial number on her forearm. Holocaust? I thought to myself. That must be why she always wore long sleeves.
I got up to clear my plate. “Whitney, don’t worry about the dishes. I understand from them that you are going back to work. Go on the back deck for a minute and get some air. I think it will help,” Helga suggested.
“Great. So I am the only person on this boat who doesn’t understand Chinese? Lovely,” I said. I set my plate down loudly but took Helga’s suggestion and walked out to the lower deck. We were anchored north of Old Town and south of Washington. I thought about the distance from the boat to the shore. I could escape if I had some place to run. My satin pants flapped in the breeze. I felt my long locks of hair take flight behind me. I held onto the chrome railing and closed my eyes.
Reid’s muscular arms slipped around my waist. “I’m sorry. I am only trying to protect you. I did not want to tell Mr. Parks you needed a break in front of you since then you would refuse to take it. I knew how deep you were in your mind and it is not easy to surface into reality after achieving that emptiness. What we are trying to accomplish in a few hours usually takes months, if not years, for others. I don’t want you to be unable to come back to me.”
“What did Mr. Parks tell you?” I asked. I leaned back against him. The breeze on my face made me feel alive.
“To go again. That we could not stop until sundown,” Reid said. “And that if you need me as an anchor, I should get used to cold water.”
Reid and I spent the afternoon practicing. I became stronger and faster as Reid tried to explore areas of my mind I wanted untouched. He wanted to know what made me made me feel anger, pride, jealousy, hurt, sadness, delight, euphoria—everything. I was closing him down faster and faster until he tapped into love. I stumbled as he moved through the images of my family and my friends until he found himself with lightning speed. I was mired down by the weight of the emotion. The exhaustion was crippling. I felt too tired to breathe. I wanted to sleep here and not bother waking up. Here, there were no problems to solve.
I heard my name from someplace far away. It was Reid’s voice but it could not rouse me. I felt his hands rapidly taking the blindfold off. His hands were behind my limp neck and he was kissing me. He was kissing me with an intensity that made me respond to him, even in my deepest sleep. The electricity of our connection jolted me back from the cliff of the dark abyss. I floated back toward the surface. I gasped for air. My eyes blinked and I reached for him. I needed to touch him to know I was in reality.
“Don’t ever do that again,” he threatened in a voice thick with emotion from over me. Relief swam in his eyes. He couldn’t be that angry. I focused on his face. I was winded and everything was still hazy.
I pulled him down to kiss him. It was such a jolting connection
that it helped connect me to the present moment. Kissing him made me feel like I was on fire and the heat was my placeholder. It helped me to know that I was not lost in my own mind. That’s when it happened. I had jumped in Reid’s inner thoughts.
Reid collapsed onto the bed but I didn’t let go of him. I wanted to know some of the things he knew about me. I kept kissing him as I looked at some of the emotions he had on the surface level of his mind. I was sliding into trouble as I encountered the image of myself dripping in bubbles I had projected there. Reid closed me off and wrenched himself free.
“How did you do that?” Reid asked me. His face was flushed with red heat again.
“I don’t know. It just happened. I have never done that before,” I answered. I had never felt so tired. My head rested on a pillow and my hand reached for his. It was burning hot. “What’s wrong with you? Your skin is so warm it feels like you have a fever.”
“Whitney, this one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. It is an incredible battle of willpower even with Helga and Mr. Parks watching over my shoulder. I want to follow this feeling to completion but that is not what is best for you. I think being your anchor is going to kill me,” Reid answered with a pained smile. He got up from the bed and I could hear the shower running again before I crashed into sleep.
It was dark when I woke up but not very late. I could hear the dishes being moved around in the galley. The smell of lemon and garlic made my stomach rumble. I looked through my duffel bag and put a sweatshirt over my satin clothes. I twisted my hair and put it up in a clip. I walked out to dinner. Helga had left me a plate of shrimp scampi and a salad.
“Whitney, your progress today has been good. After dinner you will go up on the deck and do your exercises. You must replenish all the chi you lost today,” Mr. Parks said. I nodded. I felt weak and lightheaded. I wondered why Reid was not at the table. Helga was at the counter kneading bread dough.
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