by MJ Masucci
She felt sickened that someone would go through so much trouble to break her apart from him. But who? She could only think of one name, and it was one she suspected but hadn’t had time to figure out how to get him to admit it - Tim.
She called David to let him know what she had found. He was flabbergasted that Tim would do that to her.
“I can’t believe that nerdy asshole would do something like that. I knew I didn’t like him. I should come up there and kick his ass. What do you plan on doing to get him to admit it?”
“I haven’t figured that out yet. I am going to have to trap him into admitting it.”
“Please be careful. There is something about him that scares me.”
You and me both.
She hung up the phone with David, livid at the thought that Tim would go to such lengths to keep her apart from Xander. She wondered if he had used her email to send Xander something spoofing her. That night at the engagement party Xander had mentioned that she had wounded him. She had made a horrible mistake. Why did this keep happening to them?
She paced her apartment not sure what she should do. It would be embarrassing if she went to the Wilder’s to confess her love for him. She would have to do it tomorrow.
She pulled the stool over to the refrigerator and climbed on it. Opening the cabinet, she pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniels. It was the one bottle she hadn’t dumped. Ava might have abstained from drinking for awhile, but she needed something now. She couldn’t wait for tomorrow to come and find out how it would turn out with Xander.
She poured a small bit of the whiskey into a glass and slammed it back. It started to warm her, and she felt less jittery. She poured another small bit and sipped at it before she capped the bottle. She sat on the couch sipping at the liquid until she drained the glass. She was calm now, but her mind was going in a million directions. She was never going to sleep tonight.
Ava went into her bedroom and pulled the worn t-shirt of Xander’s out of the drawer. She wore it to bed, hugging herself as she lay on the soft sheets. It was the closest thing to him right now.
That night she barely slept and at 3:42 AM she stopped trying. There was no use forcing something that wasn’t going to happen. She got up and put on her workout gear. It was cold outside, and the wind was blowing, but she was determined to run to the Sunset gym. They opened at 4:00 AM and she would probably be the first one there. She pulled on her jacket and wool hat and went out in the cold. By the time she got back, she was exhausted.
Ava was going to have to try and survive on two hours of sleep. She needed a sharp mind for what she was going to have to do today. She showered and put her hair up in a ponytail, then dressed in slacks and a sweater. She didn’t need to entice him today; she needed to be humble. She passed on taking the subway again and took a cab to the office. It was just before seven when she removed her coat and checked her email.
There was a note from Jacob letting her know he was going to be in late today. It was perfect because she needed time to talk to Xander. She was nervous as she waited for him in the alcove. Fifteen minutes later she heard him open the door to his office. As she rounded the corner, she saw that he had left the door partially open. She pushed at it and slipped inside quietly shutting the door. He was hanging up his coat and did not hear her come in.
“I have to talk to you.”
He whipped around to face her.
“What do we need to talk about? You’ve already made it clear that you don’t want to be associated with me,” He growled.
“Don’t be like that. I found something out last night.”
“Ava, I don’t need you tearing my heart out over and over.”
“Would you shut the fuck up and listen to me! You’re so stubborn.”
He closed his mouth and sat at his desk with his arms folded waiting to hear what she had to say. She scrolled through her phone and called up the email that she thought he had sent and handed him the phone.
She watched the expression on his face change from anger to pain as he read the screen.
“I would never… I didn’t send this. Oh my God, who would do this?”
“You said that I wounded you, too. How?”
He laid her phone on his desk, and she watched as he scrolled through his. He handed her the phone, and she read the email he called up. She put her hand over her mouth as she read it.
“No, no, no. I wouldn’t ever say something like this. I don’t blame you for what happened. You didn’t use me.”
She kept shaking her head, and he came around the desk to kneel in front of her, much the way he had at the engagement party.
“Someone deliberately tried to break us up, and it worked.”
“That isn’t all,” she admitted.
“There is more.”
“Someone had put a bunch of applications on my phone to track me and read all my texts and emails. I found your number blocked as well as your email. Dani’s boyfriend Roger gave me instructions on how to check, he’s the one that found the hidden apps.”
Xander got up and stalked around the office clenching and unclenching his fists. His face had turned crimson.
“Do you know who did this? I will kill them with my bare hands. Do you know how guilty I felt when I got this? It just reinforced the self-doubt that I had that you didn’t love me.”
“I’ve always loved you. We are destined for each other.”
She reached into her sweater and pulled out the chain that held the ring he gave her years ago. He sat down on the couch and patted the seat next to him. She slowly sat down, and he pulled her into his arms and pressed his lips against hers pushing his tongue into her mouth. Giving way to him, she molded her body against his.
“I want you for always,” he whispered as he clamped his mouth onto her neck and gently sucked. She started to feel heated as he ran his mouth over her.
“Xander, stop, please. You know they still have the non-fraternization policy in effect. We can’t have sex here.”
He stopped what he was doing and looked at her.
“I don’t want to have sex with you.”
“What?”
“I don’t want to have sex with you. We messed this whole relationship up by starting out wrong. Remember, I told you that I want to court you, take you on dates, hold your hand and kiss you.”
“You expect me to wait to have sex with you again? It’s not like you can unring the bell.”
“We are going to do just that. Besides, right now I am living with my parents for the next three weeks until my apartment is ready. So how would it look if I slept over at your place and didn’t come home?”
She wrinkled her nose at him, “Where are you going to live?”
“In the same apartment as last time. The tenant moved out at the end of last month, so we’re painting and doing a little remodeling before I move back in there. I expect you to come over for dinner the first weekend I am there.”
“To sleep over?”
“No, to have dinner.”
“I can’t believe what I’m hearing. You won’t make love to me and how long do I have to wait?”
“Until it’s right.”
They heard the door to Jacob’s office open and shut. She rose from the couch, and he hugged her tightly and kissed her cheek.
“There are so many things we are going to enjoy.”
“Except the one thing that I want.”
“Be patient, Ava. You know it will be worth it. My goals haven’t changed. I still want you to be my wife.”
She felt her stomach do flip flops as she walked to the door. All the horror of the past few months had slipped away in a matter of minutes. However, she still had to clean up the mess with the person who had created it. When she got done with him, he was going to wish he never crossed Ava Keene.
She blew Xander a kiss and slipped out his door silently closing it before heading to Jacob’s office. She hummed while she waited for him to give her the assignments for the day. He looked up at her.
“Someone is happy today. Are you adjusting to having Xander back?”
“I can deal with him fine. It was just the shock of having him back.”
Even though she was exhausted, she worked with a spring in her step. Jacob had given her so many materials to work on that she needed to utilize one of the tables in the research room. No one came in until lunchtime. She was so engrossed in what she was doing that she didn’t hear the door. Arms encircled her and lips pressed against her neck.
She turned to see Xander, and he pressed his lips to hers.
“You’re cheating.”
“How am I cheating?”
“You won’t make love to me, but you are going to get me all hot and bothered? That’s no fair.”
“I am simply showing you affection. Do you not want me to touch you at all?”
“No. I guess I will take what I can get. Are you coming over tonight?” She asked expectantly.
“I can if you like but just for a few hours. I don’t want my parents to get suspicious.”
“Suspicious?”
“If I’m out too late they will wonder if I’m fooling around with someone.”
“You are! Me!”
“No, I’ll stay for some dinner and then leave by nine.”
“You’re no fun.”
The door opened, and one of the legal assistants came in to retrieve a law book. Xander separated himself from Ava before she saw them together. When the assistant left, he quickly kissed her and left the room.
Ava was excited about seeing Xander tonight. Maybe she could seduce him into making love to her. She wanted him and had for many months. Though David and Luca were good in bed, they were not Xander. She needed him.
She finished her work by 4:00 PM and went to Jacob’s office. When she entered, Xander was standing at Jacob’s desk looking at an electronic file. He had his sleeves rolled up, and his sexy tanned forearms were exposed. She loved it when he was casual. He thanked Jacob and left the office letting his fingers brush Ava’s arm as he did. She felt shocks go through her at his touch.
“Close the door; I need to speak to you.”
She put the folders she had been carrying down on his desk and closed the door. Before she sat down, he blurted out what he wanted to tell you.
“My father and Peter feel that Xander should also work on this case with me. I know you have issues with him, but you will have to deal with them because you’ll be working for both of us. Can you handle it or should I have them assign another assistant?”
“I’ll be fine. I think I can put my differences aside to work with him as long as he can.”
Inside she was bursting with joy. She would be able to work with him and see him daily without anyone knowing they truly were back together. This would need to be the best acting she ever did. She nearly buzzed out of the building to get ready for Xander to come for dinner. He had told her he wanted to order from Soul Burger. He had been craving their food and hadn’t eaten it in over two years. She had placed the order to arrive at around the same time he did. The front desk called her, and as she paid for the meal, Xander walked through the building door.
He took the bags from her, and they got in the elevator. He held her to him and kissed the top of her head. He was dressed in jeans, a sweater, and his dark blue pea coat. She loved feeling him against her.
Xander ate of the majority of the food. Ava was still trying to eat healthily; burgers, fries, and onion rings were not on her menu. They cleaned up after they were finished and sat on the couch.
Riley and Boomer had jumped up to sit near him, and he petted them telling her he couldn’t believe how big Boomer had gotten. The last time he saw the red ball of fur, he was a kitten. He played with them until Ava removed them from his lap and placed herself there. She began kissing his face and neck as her hands slipped under his sweater.
“Ava, what are you doing?”
“Loving you.”
“I think you are trying to seduce me.”
She looked at him with a smile on her face.
“I think it’s time for me to go.”
“It’s only 7:30. You can’t leave yet. You said you would leave at nine.”
“I will if you stop pawing me. We can kiss, but that’s it.”
Ava groaned. “You’re serious about not having sex?”
“Yes, I am. So it’s kissing or nothing.”
She pressed her lips to his and began sucking on his bottom lip. Her tongue probed his mouth and flicked against his until they were rubbing them together. He sucked on her tongue, and then his lips trailed against her cheek and down to her neck. The effect of his kissing was making her wet, and she could feel how hard he was against her.
Her hand slipped in between them, and he grabbed it.
“No, Ava.”
She pulled away from him out of breath. “I’m going to be doing a lot of masturbating if this is the way we are going to be each night. What happens when we start sleeping at each other’s place.”
“Nothing. We can sleep in bed together without having sex.”
“This is worse than being apart. I’m with you, but I can’t have you.”
He shut her up by pressing his lips against hers. This was the way it went each night for the rest of the week. He would get her heated and then go home for the night leaving her to use her vibrator night after night.
It was no better for him. He walked out the door hiding his erection with his coat. Each night, he would jerk off in the guest bathroom before he went to sleep. He wanted her, but he was determined to restart their relationship right.
On Saturday, they were going to spend the entire day together. Xander wanted to take her to the Museum of Natural History and lunch. He picked her up at 9:00 AM and they spent several hours walking around the museum. Then he took her to Shake Shack for lunch.
“More burgers!”
“I spent over four years away from Manhattan, and I need to have my fill.”
“Please tell me you will let me cook healthy for you tonight?”
“I promise.”
They got back to her apartment in the late afternoon when the sun was starting to sink in the sky. It was frigid outside, and the weather report said that they were going to get a couple of inches of snow tonight. Xander couldn’t wait because it was what he had missed living in California, the cold weather and snow. He became all excited like a little kid at the prospect of waking to snow, even if it wasn’t waking while in bed with her.
She cooked a healthy meal of roasted chicken and vegetables with a large tossed salad. Surprisingly, Xander didn’t put up a fight when she nixed the idea of steaks. After he had helped her clean up, she went into her bedroom to change into something more comfortable, sweats and a t-shirt. She lay on her bed and called him in. He raised an eyebrow because lying on her bed was dangerous territory. But he complied, and they began to kiss. After several minutes she pulled back and looked at him, her eyes full of desire.
“Please, Xander. I want you so much.”
“Do you think it’s easy for me to say no to you? I’m getting sick of using my hand each night after you get me all revved up.”
“Then don’t say no. Make love to me.”
He sat up in bed. “I can’t. I want this to be done properly. We’ve made so many mistakes.”
“You’re saying making love to me was a mistake?”
“Don’t twist my words. That was never a mistake. I’m saying that we need to take it slow. We have our whole lives to make love.”
“I seem to remember you saying that before and look what happened.”
“Let’s not argue. I have to go. I’m sure my parents are wondering where I am anyway.”
“What excuse are you using?”
“I told them I am volunteering at the Kids Afloat Center.”
“I think we should do that.”
“Okay. Then how about next weekend? Maybe you can keep your hands to yourself if we are around children.”
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br /> She stuck her tongue out at him, and he laughed. Xander kissed her and put on his coat. It was getting harder and harder to let him go. Each night when he left, his cologne lingered in the air and on her. Ava couldn’t wait for the nights when they could at least sleep in the same bed.
Chapter 28
Sunday night, Ava tossed and turned. She and Xander had a particularly hot make-out session, and though she used her vibrator, it didn’t satisfy what she needed. At 5:00 AM she got dressed for the gym. The weather was windy and temps in the single digits. She decided that the building gym was a better choice than going all the way to Sunset. She didn’t like the idea of leaving the gym in this cold while all hot and sweaty from a workout. It was a good way to get sick.
At this hour she was the only one in the gym. She had her choice of treadmills, and she took the one near the window. The streetlights illuminated the sidewalk outside, and she was able to watch the early morning flurries hit the pavement. It was hypnotic to watch as she ran. By the time she finished the flurries had stopped, but they left a light coating of white that told her it was a day to wear boots to work.
She went upstairs and quickly showered. The clothing she had laid out for today, she put back in the closet. If Xander didn't make love to her, she would torture him visually. She found the perfect short dress that showed cleavage. She had plenty of time to pin her hair up and expose her neck. She chose a pair of black heels and put them in a bag while slipping on her faux fur lined boots. A long black wool coat with a hood completed the ensemble.
She began the two block walk to the subway as the wind whipped around her and under the coat. Her backside and legs would be frozen by the time she got there. That was when she decided to hail a cab. This was not a day for a short dress, but she wore it for a purpose.
On eighteen, she went to her desk and pulled off her coat. Her nose was red, and her cheeks wind burned from the short walk into the building. It was before 7:30 and she checked her email while she removed her boots and slipped on her heels. Jacob again sent an email letting her know he would be late. She chuckled that it was becoming a habit for the new dad. He and Sandra needed to take Nicole for a check-up. He would be in after ten, and she was to work with Xander.