Narissa shifted toward him. Her hand touched his arm and drifted down till she reached his hand. He spread his fingers, and she laced hers with his.
“River, you…” Narissa’s voice died away before she finished.
“I what?”
“You’re hard to resist.”
He would have smiled—this was the best thing she’d ever said to him—but she sounded too frustrated for him to enjoy it.
“Is there some reason why you have to resist me?”
She didn’t answer. Her hand twitched in his, an outward sign of the tension he could feel rolling off her in waves.
“That’s a loaded question. Can we just… indulge for a few minutes with no expectations for the future? Just here, right now, nothing more?”
His heart hammered in his chest so hard it was painful to breathe. Wanting to just say yes and take anything she offered, he still held back. “Narissa, is there someone else? Is that what’s holding you back?”
“No, I’m utterly and completely single. It’s not that. The timing is just really bad for me and I don’t know what the future looks like. I’m afraid we’ll get hurt if this goes any further, but I’m not strong enough not to want at least one moment with you.”
She let go of his hand and moved to face him, putting her back to the sea. She slid her hands up his chest, as determined as the breeze that rustled their hair. River breathed hard as his pulse throbbed with both surprise and the sheer pleasure of her touch. It felt like a dream when her hands slid around his neck and tugged his head down to hers for a kiss.
For a time he was lost in a kiss unlike any he’d ever known—it demolished every memory of other moments and other kisses with other girls. It was tentative but desperate, perfect but innocent. Was this her first kiss? Surely not. But even as the thought flashed through his mind, he wanted it to be true.
Her kiss, however unpracticed, was potent. Feeling drowsy, almost drugged, he pulled back. Something tugged on his mind, something that felt dangerous.
“River?”
He heard the hurt question in her voice, and his resistance ebbed away like the tide. He closed the distance between them and when their lips met, he wondered why he’d questioned it. This was paradise.
He let her lead the kiss, feeling the urgency coming off her in waves, but soon the pull between them became too much, and River took over to keep from drowning. He deepened the kiss, pulling her tighter against him until she rose up on her toes. Then he felt something wet and warm running down his jaw. She was crying.
He stepped back to see her better, and the breeze dried the tears on his skin. But he couldn’t see her well enough so he cupped her jaw with his hands and found her cheeks still wet as new tears slipped from her eyes. He wiped them away, wishing he could see her better than the darkness allowed. “Narissa. What is going on? Are you in trouble?”
“No, I’m fine,” she said, her voice husky and so soft it was hard to hear over the crash of the surf.
“Don’t lie to me. Please, tell me.”
But instead of answering him, she pressed her face against his chest and gripped his shirt as if he was her only safe harbor. River held her, rubbing her back, wanting desperately to comfort her, protect her, but having no idea what was going on. Possible scenarios ran through his mind: an abusive ex-boyfriend, a bad home life, a stalker? All he knew was that if someone was threatening her, he would find out who and end it. But first, he had to gain her trust.
“You’re safe with me. I promise.”
She sobbed and pushed away. “I know. Oh, I know. But you aren’t safe with me.” Then she ran down the beach, lost to the darkness of the night. River followed her, calling her name, but she was gone.
Chapter Five
Narissa ran. Her worst fears had come true. Kissing River and being held in his arms had ruined her soul for any other kind of happiness. He was everything she wanted—warmth, strength, and what she always imagined coming home must feel like. And she couldn’t have it.
Leaving River behind in the dark, she rushed to the portal under the restaurant’s deck and shifted into the Realm. Though there were customers at the bar right above her head, she didn’t hesitate to strip down to her underwear. They couldn’t see her, even if she could see them.
Running again, she hurtled across the sand and into the water. She didn’t change or dive in. She hadn’t come here to swim.
The water was cool but gentle tonight, the waves no more than a foot high and far apart. When she was waist deep, she stopped and shifted until her feet burrowed deep into the sand, then let her head drop back. Taking deep breaths to calm herself, she ran her fingers through the silky water and closed her eyes.
The emotions churning inside her were too wild to be stilled, however. Glaring up at the fat crescent moon, she roared like a hurricane. “Why? I didn’t ask for this. Why can’t I just be free to choose what I want?”
But the universe was deaf to her outcry. The moon still hung complacently in the inky sky, and the waves rolled past her undisturbed. There was one who would listen though, if she said his name.
Did she dare?
She wrapped her arms around her and remembered what it had felt like to be wanted, to belong. If River made her feel like that, it was worth the risk.
Taking a deep, shuddering breath, she called out, “Poseidon.”
The call went out like a ripple across the water. She knew he would hear it but had no idea if he would answer. No doubt it depended on where he was or how bored he was. Her heart pounded relentlessly in her chest. Whatever happened, she couldn’t take it back now.
She stood for what seemed like hours in the water tense and anxious, wondering what would happen. When nothing did, she realized she was shivering and that no doubt Uncle Jesse would be massively worried about her. He wasn’t going to come.
She turned and walked back to shore, her eyes fastened on the lights up and down the coast since there was nothing in the Realm but darkness. It just seemed like one more blow, one more taunting vision of what she couldn’t have, and her eyes filled with tears.
Then, as she got to shore, she stopped, sensing that someone was there, walking towards her from the east.
“Ah, a pretty mermaid,” the man said. “Are you the one who summoned me?”
His voice seemed to boom around her even though he spoke normally. Every hair on her body stood straight up, but she wasn’t afraid. She had no doubt this was Poseidon, and he seemed to be in a pleasant mood.
“Yes, that was me. My name is Narissa. I’m Hali’s daughter.”
He continued to walk toward her. “Really? Yes, I see the resemblance now. What do you want from me?”
“I have a favor to ask, though there is no reason you should grant it. If there was anyone else I could ask, I wouldn’t have bothered you, I promise.”
He stopped, now only a few feet away from her. “Something you cannot ask your mother for? Her powers are great enough to do many wondrous things.”
“Will you make me human?” Narissa asked, deciding to jump right in.
Poseidon’s laughter rang out as if it echoed between mountains. He towered over her, bare chested with only a thin white covering banded beneath his waist. His hair was long and dark and his beard trimmed short on his sculpted jaw. He looked every inch the god he was. Narissa bit her lip, not at all surprised that he found her request so humorous.
When he spoke again, his voice still shook with amusement. “Tell me, child, does Hali know you’re asking this?”
Narissa shook her head. “No one does.”
“And why do you want to be human?” His voice grew deeper, less amused with every word. “Do you not appreciate the gifts I gave your kind?”
“I love them, and if I could have what I want most and keep them, I would prefer to.”
“And what is it you want most?”
“To be able to live with the sun on my face and to be loved for who I am and not because the man I want is e
nchanted by my magic.”
Poseidon rubbed his beard thoughtfully. “Your voice rings with sincerity. No doubt your heart is already involved. I will consider granting you this favor, but only after you have served your people.”
Served them? Narissa had done nothing but serve them since she was sixteen. She’d convinced dozens and dozens of men to join her people in that time. “How must I serve them? Can you tell me what you want me to do?”
Poseidon shook his head. “You must figure that out on your own. I will watch you closely, never fear. I have no doubt I will see you again.”
Narissa bowed her head as he walked past her. She turned to watch him leave, keeping her eyes focused on him as he faded back into the darkness.
She had no idea what the consequences for this night’s choices would be, but at least she had taken a step towards a chance at freedom.
Exhausted beyond anything she’d ever known, she went home. The restaurant was dark and silent as she came in. The side door had been left open for her, so her uncle knew she was out. Had Anne covered for her?
When Narissa woke up the next morning, she seriously questioned her sanity. Kissing River had been better than any story, better than any paradise, better than any dream. If only they had just been two humans falling in love with easy, human problems to solve. But no. She had to be a mermaid—and worse, a siren whose job it was to lure humans beneath the waves. If only she’d been strong enough to keep River at arm’s-length. But she’d always been reckless. And selfish, too apparently. Her stupidity meant that River would be hurt too.
If Narissa had needed any warning that her dreams were fated to end in disaster, she had only to look at her uncle. In fact, it was because of him she knew to call on Poseidon.
Before she’d been born, Uncle Jesse had been a siren, just as she was. He had fallen in love with a human and had lived with her for almost a year, somehow keeping who he was hidden from the woman. The whole time, he begged and worked to be allowed to live permanently on land. When his wife gave birth to their child, he had gone to Poseidon himself and asked to be made human.
Since Poseidon had fallen in love with dozens of mortal women and had numerous children with them, he was sympathetic and granted the request. Unfortunately, when Uncle Jesse returned home to his lover and child without his siren powers, it was only to discover that her love was nothing but an enchantment. And by that time, she had discovered that her baby was different. Unable to handle the shock, she’d run away, leaving him with the baby and a broken heart.
As a cautionary tale, it was sharp and raw. Narissa saw the hurt and loss in his eyes every day.
As Narissa lay in bed, she heard him downstairs, returning from his daily trip to the docks for fresh fish. Her stomach growled at the thought of food, so she forced herself to get up and dress for the day. She pulled on a pair of cutoff denim shorts and the teal t-shirt that served as the restaurant uniform. It said, “I’m secretly a mermaid” in big letters with the name of the restaurant on the back. Of all his secret humor, this was her uncle’s favorite joke.
All at once she remembered that Anne was scheduled to come in early this morning. If she mentioned River to Uncle Jesse, it would not be pretty. If there was one thing Uncle Jesse had always taught her, it was not to fall for a human. So, yeah… a chatty Anne would be disastrous.
She rushed downstairs, almost missing the bottom step in her haste. As she caught her balance, she looked around desperately. No sign of Anne. She relaxed.
Uncle Jesse looked up from filleting a large mahi with his sharp knife and raised an eyebrow. “Looking for someone?”
“Oh, Anne, I guess.”
“She’s not hear yet. Want some breakfast?”
Narissa concentrated on making her voice sound both calm and cheerful. “You know it.”
She made herself a cup of chamomile tea, the whole time keeping an eye on the door. She took her cup over to the little table under the window just outside the kitchen prep area where the family ate their meals. She sat in the chair against the wall so she could continue to watch for Anne, and sipped her tea. A few minutes later, Uncle Jesse put a plate in front of her with delicately cut pieces of fresh, raw fish, chopsticks, and some of his wonderful ginger-soy dipping sauce.
The fish was firm and sweet. She enjoyed the first bite without dipping it, enjoying the pure flavors of the sea. Not a usual breakfast for humans, of course, but she needed it to stay healthy—especially since she had a thing for junk food.
She had just taken a bite when Anne came in from behind her. “So, how did things go with River last night?”
Narissa choked on the fish and coughed desperately so she could talk again and shut Anne up.
Anne pounded on her back, then ran over to get Narissa a cup of water once she was able to breathe again.
“Are you okay?” Uncle Jesse asked, eyeing her with concern and standing as if ready to rush to her aid.
“I’m good.” She pulled Anne down into the chair across from her and whispered, “Will you keep your voice down?”
“What? Doesn’t Jesse know?”
“No. And I want to keep it that way.”
Anne leaned across the table and spoke quietly. “When River came back in without you, I was super worried. And he was freaking out. He said you’d run away from him on the beach.”
“I sort of did.”
“Why?”
“Reasons.”
“Narissa, the guy paced around the restaurant like a nervous tiger until you came back in and then left without even talking to you. There’s no way you can get out of this without telling me what happened.”
Narissa buried her face in her hands and groaned softly. There was so much she couldn’t tell Anne. Her secrets twisted in her, searing her like a hot knife.
“Narissa?” Anne asked, grabbing her attention again.
She looked up at her friend, meeting her eyes steadily. “Look, I’d rather not talk about it. And if you’re trying to make me feel guilty, you can stop. I already do.”
“Are you going to at least call him?”
“I don’t have his number.”
“How do you not have his number?”
“I just don’t, okay? Besides, he works in the mornings, remember? He’s probably out on a boat somewhere. I’ll figure things out when I get to work at the souvenir shop on Monday.”
Anne stood up, done with her coffee. “Well, I know you have feelings for this guy so don’t push him away just because of a fight.”
“We didn’t fight.”
Anne raised an eyebrow, clearly not believing her. “Well, good. If you get a chance at happiness, Narissa, take it. You don’t always get a second chance.”
Anne turned away, fingering the gold pendant that hung at her neck, her expression set in the calm mask she so often wore. Narissa looked thoughtfully after her. She suspected there was something in Anne’s past that had hurt her deeply, but Narissa had never dared to pry. If only she would open up and talk about it.
Even if she did though, Narissa doubted she could do anything for her. There was only one way she knew of to heal emotional pain. The magic that transformed a human into a mer healed them body and soul, but Anne wouldn’t want to give up her humanity.
“Hey, Narissa, come back here a minute, would you?” Uncle Jesse asked, calling from the kitchen.
Her stomach twisted as she got up. Had he overheard them? She tried to look as innocent as possible. “I was about to go fill condiment bottles. Need something first?”
“Yeah, help me get this fish to the cooler.”
She raised an eyebrow, since he’d never asked her to help with this before, but she stacked a couple of the plastic bins filled with raw fish fillets and followed him without question.
Once in the cooler, Narissa held hers while he put his on the shelf. The door to the cooler was closed nearly all the way, and the cold, humid air prickled against her skin. When he was done, he took her bins and moved them to th
e shelf for her. The whole time, she kept an eye on the narrow crack in the open door. If it closed, they’d be locked in there.
When he was done, he made no movement to leave. Instead, he crossed his arms over his broad chest and asked, “Okay, now that we have some privacy, will you tell me what’s going on?”
Narissa clenched her jaw. She wanted to curse, but that wouldn’t improve matters any. Instead, she tried to tease him. “Tell me what makes you suspect something is going on. I don’t want to reveal anything I don’t have to.”
“Tell me about the boy.”
Narissa folded her arms across her chest. “River? I met him at the souvenir shop.”
“But he’s not the one you plan to turn?”
“No. That’s Brody. River is healthy and has a future. There’s no way I’d ever pick him.”
“Then why are you carrying on with him?”
“What? I’m not?”
“No? Do you think I’m blind? That I wouldn’t notice a guy as big as he is pacing around my restaurant for hours?”
Narissa let her arms drop to her side. “Okay, so I kind of have a thing for him. And I’m probably in over my head.”
“An ironic phrase for a mermaid. How bad is it?”
This was it. The moment Uncle Jesse would erupt like Mount Vesuvius. But it wasn’t like she could keep it a secret forever. Her confession spilled from her mouth in a turbulent stream. “I’ve asked Poseidon to make me human.”
His silence was more awful than if he’d yelled. It chilled her more than the frozen air pumping through the vent. “What were you thinking?”
“You know I hate living in the ocean. I’ve always wanted to stay on the land. I didn’t ask for all these human genes. Why shouldn’t I have what I want?”
His voice softened, gentled. “Because your people need you.”
“That’s what Poseidon said. He said he would only change me after I had served them. But what about what I need? Doesn’t that matter?”
The Lovely Deep (The Mer Song Trilogy Book 1) Page 4