by Barbara Lohr
“No way. What has he done?”
“Sissy Hanson. That’s what or who he’s done.”
McKenna’s loud gasp could probably be heard in the main building. “No way. Seth would never do that to you. Where did you hear this?”
Taking her seat, Selena poured out the sad story. “You’re probably right, McKenna. This may have been just a dream—although I think he should dream about me. But things aren’t looking good.”
“My younger brother can be a knucklehead.” Stunned didn’t quite cover McKenna’s expression as she plopped into the wingchair and listened to Selena’s story about shattering the new dinnerware in an all-out assault on Seth.
“You mean the ones you just gave him for Christmas?”
Selena wiggled her eyebrows. “Bad right?”
They both laughed until tears came.
Then the chuckles died in Selena’s throat. “Seth's not coming around with a ring like Logan. He’s not even offering me the L word.”
McKenna’s jaw dropped. “Are you kidding me? Selena, that’s crazy. You are gorgeous, funny and smart. I can think of maybe ten other guys who’d stand in line for a date with you. Go for it.”
And this was from Seth's own sister? “What are you saying?”
“Seth doesn’t even tell you he loves you? He’s going to be thirty, for Pete’s sake. The boy better take a good look at his life and what he wants.”
A rock plummeted to the bottom of Selena’s stomach. “Guess it’s not me.”
Grabbing Selena’s hand, McKenna squeezed hard. “Trust me, he does want you. You just have to remind him of that.”
“How?”
McKenna’s lips tilted into a devious smile. “Plotting Seth’s wake up call will give me something else to think about...”
“Right. Besides your wedding? Caramba, McKenna. That should be your main concern right now, not my problems.”
McKenna’s engagement to the hottest doc on staff made Selena so happy. She’d been with them on their mission trip to Guatemala the summer before, the week that really sealed their romance. Why couldn’t Seth have Logan’s certainty?
“Seth never tells you he loves you?” McKenna’s forehead wrinkled.
“It’s more a ‘Love ya, babe’ thing.”
The sound from McKenna’s lips gave Selena the giggles. She did the best strawberry ever.
“And the worst part is, this isn’t the first time I’ve broken up with Seth. He might not take me seriously.” Selena couldn’t resist looking at her pinging phone, where texts kept popping up.
Still mad at me? Don’t be. Please.
And also:
Hated to get out of bed this morning without your wakeup call.
Uh huh. She knew exactly what Seth meant and her body reacted.
Finally:
Want to come over and watch the game this afternoon? We can talk.
Right. Talking during a basketball game. That would never happen.
Seth wasn’t good at talking. Period.
“Show him you mean business.” McKenna’s face brightened. She was such a great idea person. The specialized birthing unit now under construction had been her brainchild, although at first Logan had fought it. As head of OB at Montclair, he could be conservative.
“How can I show him anything? I told him I never wanted to see him again.”
Of course she would see Seth again. Every time an EMS Limited ambulance pulled into the Montclair ER, there was a good chance Seth would be on it. She couldn’t avoid him forever.
Getting to her feet, McKenna strolled to the window and began to etch hearts into the white frost. Despite the maintenance department’s work, the windows in this building continued to frost over. “Stay in his face, Selena. Don’t give up, okay?”
“I'm not a quitter.”
“That's right. Resilience. That's what you teach those women in Guatemala.” McKenna smiled at her window handiwork. “And you’re a good friend. You even come to Sunday dinner at my parents’ house.”
“When Seth and I were together. I’m not coming today.”
“Why not?” McKenna tried to look all innocent.
“Because I can’t? Because I’d like to pick up a kitchen knife when I think of Seth and Sissy.”
McKenna’s chuckles echoed in the small office. “Make it uncomfortable for him.”
Selena’s phone pinged again and her chest tightened. “I don’t know if I can do this. Not today.”
“Maybe you're right. Give my family time to needle him. They know the drill with Seth. Growing up, he had to have everything the other boys had. If Connor got a new lunch bucket, Seth had to have one too.”
“But Connor’s the oldest.”
“Seth never got over it. A middle child who had some, er, issues.” McKenna stumbled a bit but before Selena could get a question in, her friend roared on. “He’d gripe to my mother and usually got what he wanted.”
“Reenie does fuss about him.” Selena loved the family's nickname for Maureen Kirkpatrick. “I like to hear how it was with your family growing up.” For Selena, the rowdy family seemed almost magical.
McKenna shrugged. “We're like most families, I think.”
“How can you say that? Growing up, I never went to one school. You were at St. Edmund's from first grade to fifth grade, right?”
McKenna shrugged. “Sure. We all were. Even my mom went to that school.”
They were talking about different planets. Time to set the record straight. “We moved all the time, McKenna. Like any migrant family, we followed the crops from Texas to Michigan and then back down again. We were always changing schools. I never had a best friend.”
The last comment brought a gasp. “Oh my God, Selena. I knew you worked on a farm but...”
“Not a farm. Many farms.” Had she said too much? This felt so embarrassing but McKenna was her best friend, the one she never had growing up. “If we stopped at a store for bread and peanut butter after working all day, people would stare at our dirty clothes. When my mother spoke to us, our names confirmed what they suspected. We were 'illegals' in everyone's eyes. For a while I even considered changing my name. Selena, Rafael. Our names made us different.”
“But I love your names. They make you special.”
And that's why she adored McKenna. “That's not how the rest of the world sees it. Anyway, here in Chicago I felt like I finally belonged.” For the first time in her life, she fit in and she wanted it to stay that way.
Remembering those early years took effort. The adrenaline drained from Selena’s body and she felt so darn tired. What a good time she’d had with Seth the night before. They hadn’t done anything special. Just watched an action movie on Seth’s big-screen TV, the one the family camped in front of for every sporting event or race.
The Kirkpatricks always made her feel welcome. Bringing her crockpot over, Selena would make a huge pot of her mother’s Mexican chili, bubbling with tons of hot peppers. In fact, that crockpot was still in Seth’s cupboard.
Uncoupling wasn’t going to be easy.
“Seth always loved my chili,” she murmured, twining a curl around her finger.
McKenna’s boisterous laugh lifted Selena's spirits. “He’s gonna miss way more than that.”
Snatching Seth’s photo from her desk, Selena shoved it into a drawer. “Oh, I hope so.”
~.~
Pushing open his parents’ front door, Seth stamped the snow from his boots before stepping inside. The smell of his mother’s pot roast reminded him that he hadn’t eaten all day. Food? Last thing on his mind. Toeing off his boots, he left them on the mat along with the others. His mom had cooked one of his favorites and he wasn’t hungry. Maybe he had the flu.
Who was he kidding? This thing with Selena had him worried. She hadn’t answered her phone or texted him back all day. And that mess at home? It took him a while to clean up the broken dishes.
What a woman. He’d never seen her this angry. In a weird way, it turne
d him on.
“How’s my handsome boy?” Hurrying from the kitchen, his mom wiped her hands on her apron before lifting her cheek for a kiss. She smelled like onions and Charlie, the perfume she asked for every Christmas.
“Hi, Mom.” He tried to smile.
She peered closer. “What’s wrong?”
Dammit. “N-nothing.” He gave her a tight hug and backed off.
“Seth? What are you keeping from me?” She had him by the forearms, but no way did he want to mention this thing with Selena. With any luck, he’d have everything sorted out in a few days.
“You worry too much, Mom. Nothing.”
Thank God Mark and Connor, two of his brothers, arrived just in time from the back family room. “How’s the boy?” Connor cuffed him on the shoulder. The squalling upstairs was probably from Sean, Connor’s newly adopted son.
“You’re not looking so good.” Mark narrowed his eyes. “Big night out?”
“Nope. Not really.” Enough of this. Escaping, he marched into the living room where two of his sisters-in-law were having a heart-to-heart on the sofa. Girl talk. Bad timing.
With a wave, he escaped to the kitchen. Big mistake. McKenna was cleaning the carrots at the sink. Last person he wanted to see. Sugar-burned carrots were one of his favorites. Not today.
“How’s it going, little brother?”
“F-fine.” As if to prove it, he grabbed a carrot and munched down. His stomach did a weird twist but he kept chewing.
“You’re really going to tell me everything’s fine?”
So the word was out. Damn. He could hardly swallow.
His mother bustled into the kitchen behind them. “What’s going on?”
McKenna’s eyes skewered him. “You’ll have to ask Seth.”
With a growl, he barreled toward the family room, high-fived his dad and said hi to Logan.
“Hey, how’s it going?” Logan looked up.
“Don’t start.” Grabbing a can of pop from a bucket of ice in the corner, he plopped onto the sofa.
Feet up on a hassock, his dad looked as amazed as his future brother-in-law. “Get up on the wrong side of the bed, son?”
A retired fireman, his father had never been good at heart-to-heart talks. Seth was not about to go into the Selena thing with him. And Logan? If he hadn’t asked McKenna to marry him last Christmas, Seth wouldn’t be in this situation. He wouldn’t be here alone.
This was all Logan’s fault. He grabbed some pretzels from the bowl on the coffee table and crunched down hard. The TV blared but his dad and Logan weren’t even watching it. Instead, they were giving him weird looks.
“Could we just watch the g-game?” Pretzels in hand, Seth settled in, just as he did every Sunday. But everything felt different. “What’s the score?”
His dad was still giving him the fish eye and Logan? Was that a grin?
Amanda appeared in the doorway behind the sofa. Sean, her adopted son, was cradled in her arms. Four months pregnant with twins and she already looked like she could deliver any day. Connor came up behind her, crooning at his new son. He’d never seen his brother like this. The whole place smelled of baby powder and poop, and Connor was all googly-eyed.
“Where’s Selena?” Amanda glanced around.
Seth jumped up so damn fast he made the baby cry.
“Hey dude, baby in the house.” Connor took the baby from Amanda and started patting him on the back.
“Sorry, Amanda. Connor.” Feeling terrible, Seth wished he could comfort the baby. But he couldn’t. Not today. He'd probably drop the kid.
From the look on Connor’s face, Seth knew he’d be given the third degree later. Connor took his role as oldest in the family seriously. Seth started to sweat. Why did his parents always pump the heat up so high?
Downstairs where the pool table was set up, the kids' voices rose above the crack of the balls. Usually Seth liked hanging out with his nephews and niece. Today the noise was getting on his nerves.
Wheeling around, he headed back into the kitchen. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost, son.” His mother was tending the carrots sizzling in the pan. Smelled like biscuits in the oven, another one of his favorites. His stomach growled but nausea made it impossible to think of eating.
“Aw, Mom. I don’t think it’s a ghost that’s bothering him. Is it, Seth?” Lifting the cover of the slow roaster, McKenna poked the meat with her fork. Her sly grin told him she knew. Cornered, he felt like he was in a speeding ambulance and the patient wasn’t responding.
“Nothing is bothering me, okay?” Maybe he needed a beer, not pop. Tossing his empty can into the trash, he grabbed a beer from the refrigerator, twisted off the top and took a cool sip. It tasted like vinegar and his stomach lurched.
He should have stuck with the pretzels.
“What’s the matter, Seth?” A smile played along his sister’s lips. She was loving his discomfort. Had she told their mother anything? That would be out of bounds.
He did what any man would do. Kept quiet. He was edging toward the door when McKenna turned, “Hey, how’s Sissy Hanson doing?”
His mother’s head jerked. “Who is Sissy?”
“N-no one. Just someone I work with.”
“Long blonde hair,” McKenna murmured while his mother’s mouth fell open. “She wears it in a braid down her back. Does she ever unbraid that thing, Seth?”
Spatula in hand, his mother fisted her hands on her hips. “Seth Michael Kirkpatrick, what have you been doing?” Looked like she just might use that spatula on him, the way she did years ago when she caught him raiding the cookie jar.
“Nothing.” His arms flew out, sending the damn beer all over the kitchen.
With a smug smile, McKenna handed him a roll of paper towels. “That’s about right, Mom. He’s been doing absolutely nothing. Better clean up your mess, Seth.”
Chapter 2
When Selena pushed open the heavy wooden door of the Purple Frog, she could feel the music clear through to her teeth. Fine, bring it on. Anything to knock Seth out of her head. If he would just stop calling and texting. She sent him straight to voicemail.
Maybe she’d listen later. Probably more than once.
She was tempted to print off the texts. Now, how pathetic was that?
Forgetting Seth? Not working out so well.
McKenna stood up and waved from a back booth. Easy to see her red hair, even in the low light. Peanut shells crunched underfoot as Selena plowed her way through the crowd. A few folks from the hospital greeted her.
“Where’s Seth?” Livvy Wright from OB asked.
A shrug was Selena’s answer. She had to get used to this and soldiered on toward the back.
When she reached the booth, Vanessa and Amy were already there.
“Hey girl, where you been?” McKenna scooted over and Selena sat down.
“Had a hard time finding a place to park. Vanessa. Amy.” She gave McKenna’s friends from high school a smile. Tonight they were going to talk about McKenna’s May wedding. Felt like rubbing salt in the wound, but Selena stretched a stiff smile across her face.
A pitcher of beer and four frosty mugs arrived. McKenna poured and then raised her glass. “To my good friends. Celebrating all our problems with men because they always work out in the end.” The pointed glance was meant for Selena but she buried her nose in her mug.
Work out? With a man who put the capital S on stubborn? Not likely.
“You got that right. Alex got so high-handed with me when he was trying to claim Bo. I want to pop him over the head.” Vanessa’s smile softened. “Then we got married and my baby girl Melody came along.”
“How is your little girl doing?” Heat flooded Selena’s face. She had to build a fortress around her heart when it came to babies.
“Melody’s great. Slept through the night after the second week. But Bo? Definitely some sibling rivalry.”
They all laughed but for Selena, it felt hollow. Their waiter swung by again and skimmed a
basket of peanuts onto the table. The conversation turned to bridesmaid dresses. When the music kicked up, so did their voices. Donna Summers was breathing and panting. The sexy sounds took Selena back to making love with Seth. Memories knifed her and she took a deep breath.
McKenna broke into a raucous laugh. “Wait a minute. This song was playing the first time I met Logan outside of work. We came here. Talk about the conversation warming up.”
More chuckles, then McKenna slid an apologetic glance in Selena’s direction. Maybe it was her Latin heritage but Selena could never mask her feelings. Seth had liked that about her. “My hot chili pepper,” he’d teased her.
Right now her smile felt splintered around the edges.
Vanessa tilted her head to one side. “Maybe the song could give me some pointers. “Once you have two kids, things change.”
“Those night feedings will do it to you every time.” Amy’s eyes were ringed with fatigue.
“How old is Gianna now?” Selena asked.
“About ten months.”
“I delivered her last spring, remember?” McKenna’s smile turned misty, like she might be thinking of the babies she’d have with Logan. Selena’s eyes stung and she blinked furiously. Although McKenna had delivered Amy’s baby, Selena had been one of the first to see Gianna. So perfect and delicate.
Parenting might take a lot out of a woman but Selena was ready for it. For years, she’d watched her own mother have baby after baby. She still went to the fields, a rebozo tied around one shoulder with the infant tucked inside.
“Amy, does Melody still keep you up at night?” She struggled to look interested while Amy launched into the details of night feedings and misplaced pacifiers. Her mind conjured up little red-haired kids who looked like Seth and her heart squeezed.
After the wedding, McKenna would probably get pregnant. Then these gatherings would be three against one. Selena gulped. She’d really be the odd one out.
As if sensing Selena’s discomfort, McKenna thumped one hand on the table. “Enough baby stuff. We’re here to talk about the wedding. Do you believe Logan suggested a destination wedding?”
“But why?” Vanessa’s forehead puckered. “I thought he had tons of friends in Chicago, since his grandmother still lives on the West Side.”