by P. Jameson
He looked up for a split second so she could see the blatant hunger in his eyes. Then he put his tongue to her soft, slick skin, tasting her arousal for the first time. She gasped, throwing her head back.
“So sweet,” he hissed. “Mine.”
Gripping her ass and squeezing to pull her closer, he lost himself between her legs. Licking and lapping and swirling. It was his own personal heaven. He could stay there for eternity and never have enough. The sounds he was wringing from her were incredible. Her frenzied moans echoed off the shower walls and he reveled in each one.
Braeh brought her hands down and tunneled through his hair, but he couldn’t fault her for it. He’d let the disobedience go this time.
When her thighs began to shake, Vesh eased up on his efforts. He didn’t want her coming so quickly. He wanted to show his mate what a wolf could do for her.
He kissed gently, and nuzzled the crease of her thigh.
“Vesh?” Her tone was helpless, vulnerable.
“Don’t worry, my sugar. I’m not finished with you.” His tongue darted between her legs once again. One quick, soft lick. “I may never be finished with you.”
He moved her body so it was under the warm spray of water, and felt himself grow harder when her skin broke out in chill bumps. Running his hands up and down her legs and pressing his face into her sweetness, he brought her to the edge again and then retreated.
“Wait, wait… I was so close,” she whimpered, her hips bucking to meet his mouth once again.
“Shh. I know.” Holding her still, he blew on her swollen flesh, making her sag against the wall. Not much longer and her legs wouldn’t hold. This time, he’d push her over the edge. Make her fly so high.
He latched onto her again, not bothering to be gentle now. She yelped and his wolf delighted in the sound, puffing his chest out with pride.
Spreading her as wide as he could, his tongue delved inside, over and over while he rubbed her sensitive spot with his thumb.
“Oh, god…” she moaned. “Oh, god.”
She tensed, and in the next plunge, she convulsed against him. Fuck. He’d never felt anything better. The only thing that could even come close would be if he was buried inside her, balls deep, while she came.
Her orgasm seemed to last forever and when it was over, she was limp and shaking, gripping his shoulders for support.
Vesh continued licking, softly now, bringing her down.
“That was beautiful, mate,” he said, his voice barely more than a whisper.
He kissed his way back up her shaking body, careful to support her weight. He took her mouth gently this time, his teeth tugging at her bottom lip.
Braeh’s eyes were dazed with pleasure, but her hand traveled down his chest searching for his erection.
Yes.
He wanted her touch so badly. Needed it. He gasped when she took him in her hand, stroking once, twice, and running her thumb over the tip. She bit her lip as he thrust into her hand. If he didn’t come soon, he’d be in pain. Nothing his wolf couldn’t handle though.
Vesh closed his eyes and threw his head back focusing on the pleasure of his mate’s touch. He’d had no way of knowing it would be like this with her. It was a welcome surprise.
But then his mind played tricks on him. Between one thrust and the next, his shitty memories came flooding back. Things that had been done to him. Things he’d done to others. Things that had no business being in his mind while he took pleasure in his mate. Why couldn’t he just move on? It was in the past. Why couldn’t it stay there? How would he ever get away from it, when not even his intended could fix it?
“Stop,” he said, sadly. “Just stop.”
Braeh immediately dropped his cock. Vesh opened his eyes to see her hurt expression. It damn near broke his heart, but what could he say.
“What is it? Did I do something wrong?”
He took her face in his hands, wiping drops of water from her flushed cheeks, and pushing the things that haunted him back into the recesses of his mind. “This is enough for now.”
It was more than enough. Her pleasure meant everything to him, and that was something that he’d never felt before. Sure, as a rule, his partners never left his bed unsatisfied, but with Braeh it was different. It was as if he needed to satisfy her as much as he needed to breathe. Something necessary and vital.
“But…” She looked down at his erection which was still substantial.
“It’s enough,” he said.
Taking the washcloth and wetting it, he spent the next few minutes washing his mate. Wolf loved taking care of her. She didn’t say a word as he scrubbed her clean. The task calmed him. It did nothing for his hard-on, but it soothed his mind.
Vesh turned off the water and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around his waist before reaching for another and using it to envelope her body. He lifted her into his arms and carried her into the bedroom.
His eyes went to hers and he wondered what she was thinking. She was quiet, watching him intently. He set her carefully on the bed and went to start a fire. When it was roaring in the fireplace, he carried the tray of food to the bed and sat next to her.
“Hope you like chicken,” she said. “That’s all they had.”
“Chicken is fine.” Thank you. He wanted to say it, but he hadn’t had many reasons in his life to utter the phrase, so it felt foreign.
They ate in silence, and when her plate was empty, he fed her spoonfuls of his mashed potatoes. When they were done, Vesh stacked the plates on the tray and set it by the door, turned off all the lights, and climbed into bed. He was exhausted from work and worry.
“What are you doing?” Braeh asked.
“Going to bed. What are you doing?”
“Aren’t you going to make your little nest on the floor?”
He glanced at her. Didn’t she want him near? “Nope,” he said. “We’ve shared an orgasm, we can share the bed.”
She slid down the headboard, and his eyes watched as the towel bunched up her legs. But then she pulled the covers around her.
“We didn’t exactly share did we?” Her voice was quiet and careful.
“Trust me, Brae, your orgasm was mine too. I made it. That makes it just as much mine as it is yours.” He brushed his thumb across her cheek. “Now turn over.”
Her gaze roamed his face, searching for something. He had no clue what. Finally she turned her back to him.
“You sure are bossy, you know?” she murmured as he pulled her body against his where it belonged. He loved her body. Couldn’t believe he’d been an asshole about it before. His criticism was his ignorant way of separating himself from anything that could remind him of his mother.
Yes, he loved his mate’s body. One hundred percent. But what scared the shit out of him now was that he was in danger of loving the rest of her too. What would they do then?
“I know.” He kissed the back of her still wet head. “I’m a wolf. You might wanna just get used to it.”
Even with all the problems they were facing, Vesh drifted to sleep feeling more content than he had in a very long time.
Chapter Twelve
Braeh watched, with a strange sense of unease, as Vesh teased her sister.
“Oh, come on, kitten. It can’t be that bad,” he laughed. Laughed. “Won’t your mate kill the spiders for you?”
“Of course,” she said, “But that’s what I’m trying to tell you. The cabin is overrun with them. I swear. I’m afraid to sleep.”
“Hmm. Well, I haven’t seen a single one in our cabin.” He turned to Braeh. “Have you?”
She schooled her expression so he wouldn’t see her shock. “No.”
“See, Kerrigan? I think your imagining things.” His eyes twinkled when he looked at her. He was downright breathtaking like this. Maybe he wasn’t exactly full of rainbows and lollipops, but he was a million shades happier than yesterday.
“Yeah, well,” she said, picking up her breakfast tray. “I better get over to the sch
ool before they start.”
“Does it feel good to be teaching again?” Braeh asked her. She knew how much Kerri missed her job.
Kerrigan grinned. “It does. I really miss being with the kids.” She dumped her tray at the nearby trashcan. “See you guys at lunch.”
Braeh watched her leave and then turned to talk to Vesh. But his whole countenance had changed. His smile was gone. The sparkling playful gaze, gone.
He grabbed her hand, twining their fingers together, and brought it up to his lips. He gave her fingers a soft kiss. “Walk with me to the barn?” he asked, his brows drawn over his eyes.
“Sure. I don’t have to be back here for a couple hours.”
He dumped their trays, the scowl firmly back on his face. Taking her hand, he led her out of the cafeteria and through the camp. He said nothing but his thumb smoothed back and forth over her palm.
They passed others heading to their jobs. Vesh surprised her when he nodded at a few and even gave them something very close to a smile.
“Hey,” she said, when they were alone again. “Are we okay?”
He glanced at her, frowning. “Fine. Why?”
Braeh shook her head, not sure how to answer. Ever since their time in the shower, she’d been on a rollercoaster of uncertainty. She couldn’t read him. Couldn’t tell what he wanted from her. Sex wasn’t exactly on the table. He wanted to pleasure her but when she would have reciprocated, he’d told her no.
Stop. His tone had sent a chill through her.
He didn’t want her touching him and damned if she knew why. She remembered how he’d flinched away from her that first night, when she tried to patch up his wounds. Now that she really thought about it, he’d definitely done the majority of touching since they’d met.
He stopped outside the fence that held the horses and pulled her into his arms.
Braeh sighed. She felt safe from the rest of the world when he held her like this. Her dad and his overbearing ways couldn’t reach her here. The stress of her restaurant business couldn’t faze her. No psycho alpha could get her for revenge. She was utterly safe.
From everything except Vesh.
He had the power to crush her it seemed. As tough as she liked to think she was, she was different with him. Vulnerable. Maybe it was because they were intended mates. The way Kerrigan explained it, it was a supernatural phenomenon. Vesh said he’d chosen her, but that wasn’t exactly true. Fate had chosen her for him.
He pulled back, tilting her head up to gaze into her eyes. “Talk to me,” he demanded.
His serious expression made her grin. “So bossy,” she murmured.
His thumb rubbed across her bottom lip, but he didn’t smile back. She reached up, smoothing her palm over his rough cheek and his eyes closed. Moving her hand to his brow, she smoothed out the creases there, and brushed her fingers over the dark spots underneath his eyes.
Vesh used both hands to squeeze her ass, fusing their bodies together at the hips. He kissed her, softly. “You touch me so sweetly. You touch me like you care. It scares the shit out of me. I don’t know what to do with that.”
He kissed her again, owning her mouth this time. When he broke away, she was breathless.
“I’ll see you at dinner tonight.”
Braeh watched him until he’d disappeared behind the barn doors. And then whistled. His return whistle made her smile.
She spent the rest of the day learning the ropes of the kitchen. The camp cafeteria had their own way of running things and it was quite a bit different than how she did things at her restaurant.
Lunch time was a rush, but she made sure to smile at everyone who came through. She’d dare say she even made a friend or two. The wolves were exceptionally patient with her. She didn’t see Vesh, but Trager came through, chuckling with an older wolf he called Asa. The man had a genuine friendly smile and Braeh liked him right away.
Kerrigan came by later, after the rush had died down and the kids had broke from school. She stood in the line, chatting while she ate her quesadilla and beans, since no one was behind her.
“So, how’s the kitchen?”
Braeh shrugged. “Fine. They haven’t let me cook anything yet, but I’m buttering them up. Soon, my darling, very soon, there will be a Braeh special on the menu.”
Kerrigan smiled, but it was only halfway.
“What’s wrong?”
She took a bite, making Braeh wait for an answer. “Nothing.”
“Riiiiight. And I’m Winnie the fucking Pooh.”
Kerrigan’s eyes went wide. “Brae!”
“What?” Braeh stirred the beans in the server. “You know I hate it when you lie to me.”
“God, you make it sound like an everyday occurrence. And besides, I wasn’t lying. Everyone and their dog knows ‘nothing’ interpreted correctly means ‘I don’t want to talk about it.’”
“Too bad. I’m your sister. Spill.”
Kerrigan was quiet for a few bites. “It’s really no big deal, okay. It’s just… working with kids—young—now, when I know how much they mean to wolves… it’s hard, you know? Knowing I can’t give him that.” Her sister’s lip quivered, and Braeh felt like shit.
“But Trager loves you, Kerri. He loves you the way dad loved mom. Maybe even more than that.”
She glanced at Braeh. “I know that, I do. I just wish I wasn’t like this. I wish I could make myself whole, and give us a family.”
Braeh couldn’t imagine what her sister must feel like. Kerrigan had been the one to take care of a bunny who’d lost its mother. She nursed that little thing with a teeny tiny bottle until it was big enough to fend for itself. Her heart had the capacity for so much more. And she should have that. She should have a house full of children—young—to spoil and look after.
“Maybe there’s something else they can do…”
Kerrigan shook her head. “No. I’m done looking for a procedure that will fix me.”
Braeh nodded. Kerri had spent her last two years of high school in and out of the hospital for testing, but the disorder that made scar tissue grow in abundance around her uterus couldn’t be helped.
“What about… is there something… wolfy that could help? Like magical were-semen or something. I mean, who knows what’s possible in a shifter world, Carebear.”
Kerri shook her head, a sad smile on her face. “I don’t think so. If there was any possibility, Trager would have mentioned it.”
Braeh tried to think of something to say. Anything to make Kerri feel better, but she drew a blank.
“How are you, sis? Are things okay with Vesh?”
“Yeah.” Even to her, it sounded lame. “I mean, I think so. I don’t know.”
Kerrigan frowned. “He seemed so different this morning, I just assumed things had taken a turn for the best.”
Braeh shrugged. “I don’t really know what’s going on to tell you the truth.”
“In the beginning, I didn’t like the idea of you ending up with someone like him. But I dunno. Maybe I misjudged him. Clearly, the Ozarka pack has issues.” She shivered. “I met the alpha and I can’t imagine what it must be like to live under an asshole like that.”
“It’s just… we aren’t connecting. It isn’t anything like how you told me it was with Trager.” Braeh rotated the serving trays. “I don’t think Vesh is going to want to claim me or whatever you say mates should do. He’s not possessive at all, actually.”
Kerrigan raised eyebrow. “He isn’t?”
Braeh shook her head.
“Huh. Weird.”
Braeh shrugged. “It’s fine. Not like I want him to be, but it’s not how you described.”
Kerrigan frowned.
Someone called Braeh from the kitchen. “Alright, Carebear. I gotta work.”
“Okay, see you later then.”
By the time dinner rolled around, Braeh was exhausted. Her feet ached and her hands were sore from chopping, but she couldn’t wait to see Vesh. Their time away left her feeling need
y. Drifting. Like a ship without an anchor.
The dinner rush wasn’t exactly a “rush”. It was more like a trickle. Even though people didn’t come all at once, the steady stream lasted for a couple hours.
Braeh looked at the clock. No sign of Vesh.
The sun set behind the clouds changing the whole feeling of the cafeteria. In the night, it felt less like a diner and more industrial.
When she was finished with her shift, she filled a plate and sat at an empty corner table to wait for him. She finished her roast and potatoes, but it didn’t satisfy her. It sat like a lump in her stomach, mingling with her nerves.
Where was he? Hadn’t he said he’d see her at dinner? Maybe he was waiting at their cabin.
When dinner hours were over and the cleaning crew had come to close up, Braeh decided he wasn’t coming.
Grabbing some premade sandwiches from the deli case would have to do for his dinner.
Braeh wound her way through camp and down the path to their cabin. A flash of anger hit her when she saw smoke billowing from the chimney. Her wolf was home.
She found him kicked back on the bed, one arm behind his head, the other flipping through the channels on the TV. He scowled at it like it was offensive in some way, and he didn’t even bother looking up when she slammed the door.
“Hi,” she said, half expecting him to rattle off an excuse.
“Hey.” His voice was dead.
Braeh set the sandwiches on the table. “You missed dinner.”
“I know,” he said, still looking at the TV. “I ate… elsewhere.”
Her heart sank to the floor. “Where?”
His only response was to shake his head.
“Where?” She could picture him having dinner with busty redhead, and it made her livid.
His gaze snapped to her, but other than that, he looked unruffled.
“I went wolf for a while.”
Braeh frowned. So he ate…?
“Oh.”
He went back to staring at the TV.
“Is something wrong?”
It was a while before he answered. “Yes. I need space.”
“Space? I… I didn’t suggest dinner? You did.”