“I’m comfortable around the people who matter to me.”
“But you let all the others push your buttons. You’ve got to be as ‘fuck you’ to all of them as you are to Noah.”
I nodded. Easier said than done when I had some unknown beast wanting me dead.
Fire Dancer put on another great show, but tonight instead of hanging around the theater, we headed to a high rise apartment building just off of the Strip which housed Peter’s apartment. The sleek architecture was offset by his cowboy interior design. I winced at the taxidermy animals staring blankly at me from multiple points around the apartment. I didn’t want to know how so many dead animals had made their way to a vampire’s home.
Old rhythm and blues surrounded us from an elaborate sound system. A tub of ice offered a variety of drinks, but mostly Venom. I wondered how much company Lennon and I had as members of the human race at this gathering.
“Good to see you again, Callie.” Peter held his thick hand out to me, kissing mine when I placed my fingers over it. “Could we talk before the festivities are in full swing?”
I gulped, eyeing the Venom. “Sure.”
He brought me into a quiet office, decorated with what looked to be old fashioned hunting gear. I didn’t know much about weapons. I didn’t sit, even when he motioned for me to do so.
“We need to put our plan in action.” He announced matter of factly.
“I don’t think tonight is a good night.”
“I’m sure you could say that about any night.” His eyes darkened and he folded his arms over his large belly, leaning back in his horsehair chair. “I’m sure Blade thinks the same exact thing. We don’t have unlimited time to act, Callie.”
“I know.” I whispered. “What do I have to do?”
“Nothing that you aren’t accustomed to already.” His voice sounded soothing, and I wondered if he had been a father when he was alive. “You just need to give a little blood. If you don’t mind me asking, when was the last time you saw Tristan?”
I smiled at Peter’s reddening cheeks. His attempts to remain as gentlemanly as possible made me feel better. “Last night.”
“Perfect.” His face brightened and the flush faded. “Would you like a drink or anything?”
“Are we going to do this now?”
“Oh, no. Like I said the other night, I don’t do my own dirty work.” Peter stood up and ran his finger along one of the shotguns on the wall. I don’t think he had any idea how much that simple move unnerved me. “Noah is the strongest. He’s the best choice.”
“You can’t be serious.” I backed up, making my way towards the door.
Peter beat me to it, placing his huge hand over the knob. “Think of Blade, Callie. Noah is my best chance against Talis.”
I leaned against a giant bookcase, gasping for air. “There’s got to be another way.”
“If you can think of one, let me know. But I’ve been working against vampires longer than you’ve been alive. That’s how I became clan leader. I know what I’m doing.”
He had no idea what he was doing to me.
“Do you want to help Blade, Callie?” He cocked his head to look me.
“I do.” My eyes brimmed with tears.
“Good girl.” He squeezed my hand. “Mo will bring you into the other room. Is there anything else you need?”
“Venom. Lots of it.”
Mo led me down the hallway and opened the door into a plush bedroom. My heart beat even faster as I watched him pour Venom over ice into a fluted glass.
“Please be careful with this, Miss Callie.” Mo soft voice’s still had a heavy accent. “This isn’t good for humans.”
“Thanks.” There was a bite to my tone. I sighed and looked down. “Is anything here good for humans?”
He looked at me sadly but didn’t say another word before he left the room.
I sat stiffly on the edge of a chair near a window. The apartment wasn’t as high up as Tristan’s, and showed a totally different view. I could see the hollows of incomplete buildings and construction equipment, cars buzzing past on the 15, as well as the lights leading the way to downtown. I watched the city buzz below and tried to quiet the screaming in my brain.
“Hello, muse.” I jumped when I realized Noah kneeled in front of me. Instead of taunting me for catching me off guard, he smiled hopefully. I think he might have been as nervous as I was.
“Listen, this is a business transaction, nothing more.” I bristled away from him as he lightly ran his fingers over my knee. “Just blood, that’s it. You try anything else and I swear to God, I’ll kill you.”
“I don’t make promises I can’t keep. You shouldn’t, either.” He pulled me up out of the chair by my stiff, balled up fists. There was no way I could take him down, but a swift kick to the junk had to hurt even a vampire. “You know what the blood does to us. You know what you do to me.”
“Noah,” I found myself turned away from him, as he cradled me from behind with one hand as he rubbed my shoulders with the other. At first the movement of the fabric against my raw skin stung, but after a minute I felt myself relax. I took another sip of Venom. “I don’t know any other way to say this, but I really don’t like you. I don’t know how I can make that any clearer.”
“There’s a thin line between love and hate, muse.” Now both his hands worked at my back. “I’ve made myself pretty clear, too. And here we are.”
“I’m doing this to help Blade.” I turned around to face him.
“Is that what you tell Tristan when you’re with him?” He didn’t give me a chance to answer before his lips landed on mine. I stood frozen as he pushed his tongue into my mouth as he place one hand on the back of my neck to pull me in closer and the other slid up my thigh, cupping the curve of my behind.
“Stop it.” He was too strong for me. I couldn’t push myself away. “Just the blood.”
“It’s never just the blood.” He moved down to suck on my neck. I was thankful the room was dark so he couldn’t see how torn up my skin was from last night.
“This time it is.” My heart leaped into my throat. “Noah, you must have girls throwing themselves at you. You don’t have to force anyone that doesn’t want it.”
“I know.” The danger in his eyes had electrical charge. “You want it, Callie. You want to help Blade.” The hand on my neck wound itself into my hair, pulling me in closer to his face.
I couldn’t help letting the tears run down my face. Usually I would have cursed my weakness, but now I hope they helped prove my point. “I don’t want this.” I had to force the words out.
His grip loosened on my hair and his hand dropped away from my ass. Not moving away from me, he placed both hands on my shoulders and led me over to the bed. It was a relief to sit down. All of my bones felt like rubber.
“Shhh.” He rubbed my back as I cried.
I looked up at him once I regained my composure. The predatory look had faded away. His face brightened when my eyes met his. This time he looked more sympathetic. “It’ll be easier for you with a little foreplay first. Otherwise, it will hurt like hell when I bite you. You need to relax.”
He was right. When Tristan had sunk into me without warning, it felt exactly like what it was. A monster tearing into my flesh. But I didn’t see how let him paw at me would make me relax. His hand moved back up to my shoulder and I put my head against his chest. The anxiety paired with the Venom made my vision swim.
Noah lowered his head to the crook of my neck, nuzzling the skin. I stayed perfectly still. The hem of my skirt balled tightly twisted in my fists. I had to do this to help Blade. I closed my eyes, and tried to transport myself away from the situation. I pictured myself lying on Blade’s couch. Blade kissing me instead.
When he finally sank his teeth into my skin, it felt good. Too good. I slipped in and out of consciousness as he drank, my hands gripped his arms to draw him in closer. The edges of my reality blurred into jewel tones.
He lowered me d
own on to the bed, still sucking at my neck. I moaned, now pulling at his hair. I opened my eyes and saw stars.
His hands worked their way back under my dress as he moved his mouth back to mine. This time I accepted his kiss, letting our tongues tangle together. I could taste my own blood. Noah unhooked my bra and reached around to cup my freed breasts. My hips arched as he brushed his fingers lightly over my nipples. He pulled away from my kiss, and stared down at me for a minute, maybe looking for disapproval, before he pulled my dress up over my head and freed my bra from my shoulders.
“You’re so fucking sexy,” he whispered as he kissed my breast. I closed my eyes and let him nip and kiss his way down my stomach. It tickled my chafed skin. My hands tangled themselves back into his hair, pushing him down, down, down.
His thumbs hooked into my tights and he dragged them down my legs, bringing my underwear along with them. Somewhere above my naked body, my consciousness floated about screaming this was wrong, but I couldn’t listen. I couldn’t care. Noah fell to his knees, untying my boots. He dropped his own pants and unbuttoned his shirt before he lay back down with me. His hand teased between my legs as he watched my eyes for reaction.
I pulled him down on top of me, startling him. I ran my fingers as hard as I could down his arms, accomplishing my goal, drawing blood. I licked the curve of his lean bicep and he groaned, jumping as if I shocked him. His fingers explored inside me as the top of his body curled and slumped against my lips. When he came back to life, he pushed up, his arms caging me in as he plunged deep inside of me. I wrapped my legs around his hips, trembling, riding the wave until we both collapsed into an exhausted, blissful heap.
We lay there tangled, saying nothing. Our chests moved in rhythm as we caught our breath.
Noah kissed me again. I shied away from him. As the euphoria of the blood floated away, the guilt rushed in to replace it.
“I shouldn’t have done that.” I pulled away from him and sat up to look for my clothes. My head spun. I tried not to panic.
“It was fantastic.” He stayed on the bed, watching me get dressed. “You did what you needed to do.”
“Don’t tell anyone.” I pleaded as I tied my boots. Everything felt so wrong now.
“Our secret.” He sat up, pulling my head back gently by the hair and kissed me again. I struggled to get away from him the best I could. “Might be too good to keep to myself, lover.”
Chapter Forty Five
It was just sex. I repeated the chant in my brain over and over again to quiet down the ugliness of what had I done?
There was no spiritual connection like with Tristan. No love like with Blade. It had just felt good. Too good. But for that, I rejoiced.
Noah would never keep his mouth shut about this. I knew it. He had wanted this too badly. He’d hold this over my head like a prize. He won. I’d submitted.
I hated the blood as much as I needed it.
It better help Blade, that’s all I could hope for. I buried my head in my hands in the corner of Lennon’s couch. Blade would be disgusted with me for what I did.
“Are you sure you’re alright, doll?” Lennon sat on the arm of the couch. “I have to head to work.”
“I’m fine.” Lie.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“It was just blood. Nothing more. For Blade.”
“I’m sorry it had to be Noah, but Peter says he’s the strongest one. Funny since he’s so scrawny.”
I shuddered, thinking of the lean lines of his body pressed against mine. “It was awful.” Another lie. It had been wonderful. It was just sex, Callie. My new mantra. You did what you had to do.
“Have fun tonight. I wish I could hang out, but I know three’s a crowd.” She ruffled my hair and headed for the door.
The aroma of flowers drifted from the kitchen. A huge vase of blood red roses perched on the counter to greet me on the way to the coffee maker. I buried my face in the blooms then checked to see who they were for.
See you tonight. XX I wanted to cry just looking at them.
If Lennon was headed to work, it must be late. I didn’t like the pattern developing of me spending the entire day on the couch after exotic vampire trysts the night before. Alright, I didn’t like wasting the whole day on the couch. I had to try to sleep without those pills tonight. They ate my whole day.
I leaned against the tile of the shower and let the water run down my body. I felt so weak. I’d done too much blood play in the last two days, and going to see Tristan almost guaranteed more. I couldn’t humanly keep up this pace, which scared me the most.
We didn’t have anything planned as far as I knew, but just for my own well being, I wanted to dress up. I needed to ask Lennon about having closet space. I had nowhere else to go for the time being, and everything was getting crumpled in these bags. Lennon would understand why that wasn’t acceptable. I picked another of Tristan’s new tops along with my denim skirt. I didn’t have the strength to feel like kicking ass tonight, so I chose my china doll slippers over my heavy boots.
I followed the sound of the guitar to Tristan’s makeshift studio. He looked surprised to see me, even though he knew we had plans. Maybe time got away from him when he played.
He surprised me when he put the guitar down and stood up to greet me. He had on a pair of worn jeans tucked into his combat boots, and a button down black shirt untucked under a black velvet dress jacket. My heart skipped a beat. He looked amazing.
“Don’t stop playing.” Everything he played on his own was so much nicer than what he did with the band. “I like it.” I went up on my tiptoes to kiss him.
“Thanks, beautiful.”
“Are we going someplace?” I didn’t know if I wanted to go out or not. “You’re all dressed up.”
“Do we need a reason to celebrate?”
“Well, no.” Something was up, I just didn’t know what. How much did Tristan know about what I’d done? Could he sense my guilt? “Thanks for the roses. They’re beautiful.”
“Not as beautiful as you. Let’s go out and have some fun. I’m dying to just let loose, you know?”
I wasn’t sure I liked the sound of this.
“We’re not going to cause a commotion, are we?”
“I hope so.” His eyes danced. “Just live a little.”
I groaned. “I’m going to regret this.”
He kissed me again before he opened the door to his Viper. “I’m not.”
**
Tristan brought me to a strip club.
My skin burned with anger and I gnashed my teeth together trying so hard to keep my mouth shut.
A burly bouncer who reminded me a lot of Tony brought us to a VIP room. We slid into a semi circle booth with a large round table in front of us. Two iced buckets flanked the table, chilling Venom for us.
“This is going to be so much fun.” Tristan squeezed my thigh.
“Is it?” I reached for the Venom.
“I see you’ve taken a liking to that stuff.” Tristan raised his eyebrows as I topped off both of our glasses. “That shit can kill you.”
“Well, I guess that’s a superpower I’ve developed, thanks to you.”
“Hey then, cheers.” He tipped his glass to mine before downing half of the liquid. His arm settled on my shoulders. “You know what today is, right?”
I had to think about it for a second. “Your birthday.”
“Just because I don’t age anymore doesn’t mean they go away.” He tipped my chin up. “You realize in a couple months you’ll be caught up to me, right?”
I’d never thought of him as not aging. But he was right, he would forever be nineteen. No matter what year it was, no matter how old the rest of us were. It made him something other than what I thought of him as. I could feel my heart tearing as tears filled my eyes.
“I didn’t say it to make you feel bad. I want you to have fun tonight.”
“Then why did you bring me here?” I looked to the middle of the room, where the n
aked girls snaked around poles and gyrated down the runway. Still others dotted the tables filled with notable patrons, entertaining them with table dances or lap dances.
“Because it’s art. They’re beautiful.” Did he think everyone was beautiful? Two dancers climbed up on our table and started grinding each other to the beat of the music, never taking their eyes off of Tristan. They probably didn’t even realize anyone was with him. “I didn’t think of you as someone who thought sex was bad.”
“I don’t.” I felt my muscles tense at the memory of last night as the brunette girl with the tattoos and massive fake breasts began stripping the blonde, her tongue following the trail of the lingerie she removed.
“Well then relax and enjoy it.” Tristan’s eyes were the size of saucers, watching the show unfold, or should I say undress, in front of us. He looked like a little boy at an arcade. I didn’t want to act like a jealous bitch, but it was hard. I wanted all of his attention. I shared him enough.
I watched him quizzically as he called one of the girls over. She was a pretty girl, with soft wavy blonde hair and a softly voluptuous body to match. Her blue eyes glowed above her peach cheeks as she somehow made her way into his lap. I scooted away so her straddled leg didn’t land on me. She looked too soft, too pretty to be in a sleazy place like this.
Her cleavage bounced just under Tristan’s nose as she listened to him talk. I couldn’t help but stare at it. I couldn’t hear what he said, but she looked past him at me and nodded. Slipping back into her robe, she made her way to my side of the booth and held out her hand. Not knowing what else to do, I took it, and she dragged me out of the booth on to a free standing chair.
My eyes practically popped out of my head. I looked back at Tristan, who looked more wicked than he ever had. The girl started wriggling around the chair, stopping behind me to put her hands on my shoulders.
“I’m Roxy.” She whispered in my ear.
I nodded. I didn’t know what to say in response. I wasn’t going to start a conversation with her. Plus, her name was ridiculous.
Because the Night (The Night Songs Collection) Page 23