by Bella Emy
I watch her take a sip of her water, the way her lips wrap around the top portion of it. Damn.
I need to get my head out of the gutter and at least pretend to focus on anything other than Harleigh and how much I want to fuck her right now. “It was good… had a couple new customers come in… finished up some jobs. Overall, it was a good day. How was yours?”
She takes a deep breath, nodding. “It was okay. Better than yesterday.”
That’s good because yesterday had been a terrible day for her. I held her as she cried into my chest for over an hour. Some days, she needs to let it out, and I become the pillow she needs to lie her head on. Words aren’t even necessary. I just have to be there for her, and she eventually calms down. She has her good days and bad days of course. Like I said before, the bad ones are becoming more infrequent.
“Good, glad to hear it.”
She chuckles. “Yeah, otherwise I never would have gotten all this cooking done.” She winks at me, and fuck, now I don’t know what I was just thinking of.
I can’t focus around her, not when she does cute little things like that. It’s never easy to concentrate when she’s around, but lately, it’s gotten so bad. I think it has to do with the fact that I’ve been refusing to sleep with any of the women I’ve met. Sure, so many of them are gorgeous, and any other time in the past, I’m sure I would have gone for it. But now, living with Harleigh and seeing her every single day, I don’t want anyone else.
Still, I can never have her. I made a promise to Cory that I can never break. She doesn’t belong to me, and she never will.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Harleigh
I wrap up the last paragraph of the article for my column, read it over a couple of times, and set it aside to edit later. At least I finished writing it.
Turning my gaze to the window, I look outside and see rain coming down. The slow drip-drop and pitter-patter of each raindrop matches the tears slowly descending from my eyes.
I bring my hand up and wipe them away. Is it even going to matter though? I’ll probably start crying again in a few minutes.
I push away from my chair and stand to stretch. Sitting in the same position for the last couple hours made me stiff. It happens whenever I’m in the writing zone. Even though my brain tends to wander at times, I still managed to get all the words out.
I can’t really complain. Having the option of working from home on days when I’m not feeling so well is a great bonus. I majored in education in college, but writing is the one thing I love. I’m so thankful I have this opportunity to do what I’m passionate about.
My head was hurting when I first got out of bed today, but the main reason why I stayed home is because it’s Cory’s birthday.
My older brother would have been celebrating his twenty-ninth birthday today. Instead, he’s lying lifelessly in a tomb six feet underground. Damn, I still can’t believe he’s gone.
Like I knew they would, here come the next wave of tears. Thinking of Cory like that is a trigger, of course.
I wipe my eyes once more, this time using the corner of my sleeve. I then walk to the window and look outside.
Typically, the streets would be cluttered with cars and buses. Pedestrians hitting the shops would crowd the sidewalks. Instead, on this rainy April day, there is practically no one around. Come to think of it, the day of Hurricane Sabrina started off just like this. Damn that horrible day…
The ringing of my cell phone brings me out of my thoughts. Looking toward my desk, I see Aubrey’s face on the screen. I walk to where my phone is sitting and pick it up on the fourth ring.
“Hey, girl.” I lean my ass against the desk and listen to what my friend has to say.
“How’s it going, Harls? I called you at the office, but they told me you called out sick. I know you’re not sick, so I wanted to check in on you.”
Aubrey knows why I’m home today. I told her a few days ago how much I’d be dreading April seventeenth. Still, I’m going to try to be as nonchalant about it as I possibly can.
“Yeah, no, I woke up with a headache and figured I might as well just work from home today. Plus, this weather… Why would I want to leave my house anyway, you know?”
There’s a slight pause on her end before she speaks again. “Uh-huh. Fine, you probably did have a headache, but I’m guessing it’s because you were up late crying last night, thinking about today?” She more asks the last part rather than states, and of course, my best friend is right again.
“Well, I…” I’m stalling, trying to think of what else to say. Why am I trying to hide anything though? This is my best friend, the one who’s known me forever. Why do I feel the need to hide things, especially this? Plus, it’s only been six months since Cory’s death, and today is his birthday. I’m entitled to be sad, aren’t I?
“Yeah, yeah. Anyway, open the door.”
Open the door? “Huh?”
My doorbell rings as I’m about to ask her something and then I realize the call has gone dead.
I put my cell phone in the pocket of my hoodie and walk to the door. I rise onto my tippy toes and look through the peephole. There’s Aubrey, standing on the other side, smiling face and all.
I step back and open the door. Aubrey is holding her black umbrella in one hand and a white box in the other.
“Hey, what are you doing here?”
“Here.” She pushes the box toward me, so I take it from her. Then she closes her umbrella, places it right outside the door, and brings me in for a tight embrace.
“Shhh… it’s okay. I’m here.”
I can’t help but chuckle. “You’re going to crush whatever’s in here.”
She pulls back. “Oh, that? No, it’ll be all right.”
“Well, come on in.” I move over and allow her to come inside my apartment.
She wipes her feet on the mat and then steps in. After she does, I lock the door behind her.
After leading her into the kitchen, I place the box on the counter. “So what’s this?”
She walks in after me. “That, my dear friend, is breakfast.”
“Breakfast?” I flick my wrist and glance at my Apple Watch. It’s just past two in the afternoon. “You do realize breakfast time has come and gone?”
She chuckles. “It doesn’t matter. Have you eaten anything yet today?”
I think for a moment. “Sure, I had some coffee.”
She smirks and nods with a smug grin on her face. “Yeah, see, coffee doesn’t count as food. But that’s all I had this morning as well. So yeah, it’s breakfast in a box. Sit down.”
I find it funny how she’s telling me to sit in my own home. I should be the one offering her a seat, but she’s like family anyway. She has all the right in the world to invite me to sit.
“Can I make us more coffee first?”
Aubrey shakes her head. “Not a chance, homie. I’m going to be taking care of that. You just sit your pretty behind down right there on that seat and let me take care of the rest.”
I shrug my shoulders and plop onto a chair.
Without wasting a single second, Aubrey brews us two cups of coffee and makes her way back to the table. She sits to my left after she sets down the mugs of steamy hot goodness.
I greedily take one of the mugs and inhale the rich brew. Damn, why haven’t I made myself a second cup before? I take a sip, and it’s like my insides come to life. I didn’t even realize how badly I needed more.
“See. I know that look on your face. I’m assuming it’s what you look like when you just orgasmed.”
I almost spit out my coffee. “What?!”
Aubrey laughs. “Yeah. Coffee does that to you when you need it.”
“Girl, you’re crazy.” I need to change the subject. I haven’t gotten laid in so long. I haven’t even wanted to with everything I’ve been dealing with, except whenever Preston is around me…
“So what did you bring?” I point at the box, which is still sitting there unopened.
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“Ah, yes. The goodies.” She grabs the box, pulls it in front of her, and opens it. A variety of treats and pastries sit inside.
“Holy shit, you’re going to destroy my diet.”
She scoffs. “Diet? Girl, that’s the last thing you need. You’ve got the perfect body. And besides, today we stuff our faces! We’re going to eat this good, healthy breakfast right here and then we’re going out.”
Good, healthy breakfast? This is probably the worst thing anyone could possibly eat at any time of day. All this sugar will go straight to my ass.
The rest of her statement registers in my brain. “I’m sorry… did you say we’re going out?”
“That’s right, woman. First we’re going shopping and then tonight, we’re going dancing.”
“Aub, the only place I’m going today is to visit my brother.” Or, rather, his grave.
“Well, duh! Don’t you think I know that? We’re going to go there first, but I didn’t think I had to mention it. I thought it was obvious.”
I smirk at her. I was planning on coming home right after and possibly spending the rest of the day in bed.
Aubrey pushes the box toward me. “Grab one, or two, or ten.”
I roll my eyes with a smirk and pick one of the sugary-coated delicacies. The sweet smell wafts into my nostrils, and I quickly take a bite, closing my eyes. “Oh my God… this is yum-ness.”
Aubrey chuckles. “Yup, you’re welcome.”
I open my eyes and look at her. “Hey, wait a second. Aren’t you supposed to be at work today?”
She shakes her head. “Oh, I’m home sick. I’ve been puking.” She pretends to vomit.
I chuckle. “Why’d you take off?”
Aubrey shrugs. “Because I knew you would need me today. It’s my duty as your best friend to make sure you’re okay.”
“Well, thanks, girl. I’m okay now.”
She nods her head. “Good. So now you can tell me all about Preston.”
I double blink. “Come again?”
She rolls her eyes at me this time. “Yeah, I would, but there’s no one inside me…”
I laugh and shake my head.
“Anyway, I know it’s got to be a little odd with him staying here after everything. I know every time I ask you, you wave it off like it’s nothing, but come on, woman…” She looks around the place, and I realize she’s taking in all his belongings: a car magazine left on the edge of the coffee table, a pair of boots in the corner next to the closet, and of course, his old college jersey, hanging off the side of the couch. I told him to put it away last night before I went to bed. Guess he forgot.
“It’s actually been really nice having someone here with me. Some days are just harder than others, and he’s been good at keeping me company.”
She’s looking at me like she can’t believe what I’m telling her. “So, you mean, you haven’t been feeling the urge to kiss him… or more?”
“Well, of course I have, but I don’t think he wants to anymore. I mean, I catch him looking at me sometimes, and it feels like he wants to do something about it, but I think with what happened, he’s just pulled away. Probably giving me the space to grieve.”
She thinks about my answer for a few minutes before responding. “Mhm. I see. Well, you still need to get some D… grieving or not. Believe me, it will help get your mind off shit for a bit.”
I chuckle and shake my head. “Maybe, but I don’t think it’s going to happen. I still have feelings for him, more than ever, but I think it’s best if we don’t cross that line while he’s staying here.”
She nods and finally takes a bite of one of the treats she picked up out of the box. “Yeah, you’re probably right, but you know Preston has always been known to be with lots of women. He’s got to be getting it somewhere if not from you.”
My mouth goes agape, and Aubrey realizes what she said.
“Shit, Harls. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. But I don’t want you to get hurt, especially over him again. I just know how he is.”
I shake my head. “It’s okay, but I really don’t think he’s like that anymore.” After all, it’s not like he has been out at all hours of the night. After work, he usually comes right home, unless he is going to see his brother, which he does on occasion. And he’s not disrespectful enough to bring random women home. If he was screwing around, he wasn’t doing it here or airing out his dirty laundry in front of me.
“Maybe. I just want you to be okay and not beat yourself up over a guy who is known to mess around. It’s who Preston is and who he always will be. I don’t think you can ever break someone out of that. In my eyes, he’ll always be the same egotistical player he was in high school. Like he’s so proud about all the girls he can screw just because he’s so hot.”
I smirk at her admittance, but she brushes me off and takes a sip of her coffee.
I know Preston’s reputation from the past. I know he used to be around different girls all the time, and I also know he used to be so full of himself. But I really don’t think he’s like that anymore.
“Anyway, finish up, girl. We have a busy day ahead.” She motions for me to drain my cup.
Yeah, shopping and then dancing tonight. Thank God she knows I want to go see Cory before any of those shenanigans can take place.
I let out a deep breath and pray to God I don’t regret what she has planned for us to get into today.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Preston
The day at the shop was a slow one. Granted, it had been expected. Gloomy, rainy days always meant slow ones at the shop. People don’t like to go out in the rain, it seems.
I close early and decide to text Harleigh to see how she’s doing. I know today has to be hard on her. It’s hard for me.
Typically on Cory’s birthday, we’d be planning a night out of drinking and fun. There would definitely be good food and plenty of laughs to go around. How different today will be from all the rest…
I let out a deep breath, lean against the counter, and compose my text message.
Me: Hey, Harleigh. You doing ok? I should be home within the hour… closing up early.
I wait for a response, and while I do, I work on closing up. Surprisingly, I have plenty of time to close and change out of my grease-filled shirt. As I’m getting into my car, ready to make my way to the apartment, her reply comes through.
Harleigh: Yeah, I’m okay. Aubrey came over a little while ago… we’re at the mall now. Going out tonight. Don’t wait up. I’m okay.
At the mall with Aubrey. No wonder she didn’t respond as quickly as she normally would. I wonder where they are going tonight. Drinking? Dancing? Ugh. I want to know, but I know it’s none of my business. If she wanted me to know, she would have told me.
Fucking great. What am I supposed to do now? I was hoping to spend some time with her, maybe watch a movie together—something funny to get our minds off what this day used to mean and what it means now.
I already visited Cory this morning before work, so now what?
I decide to do the next best thing. It has been about two weeks since I last saw Joshua, so why the fuck not? He has been kind of distant lately. It’s probably not a bad idea to see what is going on with him. Usually we’d text all the time, but his replies to me were getting shorter and less frequent than they’d normally be. I wonder if he’s upset over the whole Carla thing. My brother recently got divorced. Oh shit, maybe he’s mad at me? Fuck, he probably hates the fact that I’ve been staying with Harleigh. Maybe he thinks I should let her do her own thing, but I just feel like I can’t. I don’t fucking know.
Before I pull out of my parking spot, I text Josh so he knows I’m on my way.
Me: I’m stopping by. I’ll be there in fifteen - twenty minutes.
***
By the time I arrive at Josh’s place, the rain has stopped. I pull the car off to the side of the road, put it in park, and climb out. That’s funny. His car is parked in the driveway, but there do
esn’t appear to be anyone home as all the lights are out.
Shaking my head, I make my way to his front door regardless of the fact. Who knows, maybe he’s sitting there in the dark, dreaming about Courtney. I chuckle to myself. I’m damn funny.
He can say what he wants, but I know he still loves her. Sure, he got married a few years back, but about four months ago, he and his wife split up. Now they are officially divorced. Talk about a quick one. It was because they had no children together and not many assets. My brother wanted her out of his life as quickly as possible. Apparently, Carla had been jumping on her best friend’s dick mere weeks into their marriage. Yes, Carla’s best friend is a dude. It should have been a red flag right there. You can’t trust most guys to just be friends with women. I guess the same goes for some women.
Come to think of it, Courtney is my brother’s best friend and has been for years… and look at that. I know he loves her. He just never took advantage of her like Mark did with Carla. It also wasn’t as if Carla stopped him; she had welcomed Mark with parted thighs.
I told my brother to fuck Carla. Not literally, of course. I mean, he already did and look at what the bitch did to him.
Joshua was devastated, but Courtney was there for him, like he’d been there for her so many times.
I still think he and Courtney should hook up with one another. Courtney has been divorced for a few years now. She took the divorce hard, as expected, but just as Josh was there for her when her father had passed away, my brother was there for her yet again.
Tell me it’s not the ultimate setup. Both of their significant others are out of the picture now… both by choice, changing fate. These two belong together. I’m still waiting on the day it dawns on my brother to propose to the chick. She may not be ready to get married again yet, but one day, she will be. And I think if the proposal were to come from my brother, I think she’d willingly accept.
I’m getting way ahead of myself. Let me go see him and see how he’s doing.