She stared at the bay. It was easier than looking at Donovan.
She loved him.
She wasn’t sure when it had happened. She wasn’t even sure why it happened, because she hadn’t been looking to fall in love. But she had.
She twirled the engagement ring around her finger. In a few minutes it would be off her hand and back in Donovan’s possession. Someday he’d find a woman he loved, and that woman would wear the ring. That someday-woman would be the one to go to Ireland with him and fulfill his grandmother’s wish.
“Sarah, I just want to apologize about today,” Donovan said, interrupting her musings.
“There’s no need. I just need you to know that I truly wasn’t flirting with Mac. I wouldn’t do that to you,” she replied.
“I know. I don’t have any explanation for the way I behaved. All I can do is apologize.”
She’d thought about how to do this all afternoon. She knew Donovan wouldn’t simply let her walk away without a fight. He needed her...at least he needed to be married. Any woman would do. So, rather than just telling him it was over, she’d come up with another plan.
“We have to talk about this marriage,” she said. “It’s just around the corner, and we still haven’t totally worked out the prenuptial agreement. I think today is a perfect example of why we need one. We need everything, absolutely everything, nailed down.”
“I’ve been making notes since we started.”
“So have I.” She reached into her jean’s pockets and pulled out her paper. “I’ve started making a list of everything we’ve discussed. I know I’m not a lawyer, but I think they’re pretty clear and basic.” Taking a deep breath, she began, “Item one—What’s yours now remains yours after the marriage.”
“I think that just about covers everything,” Donovan said.
“Oh, no,” she said. “You originally said we needed to pin down everything, and I think we need more than just that one basic term. Item two—There will be no mutual purchases. If an item breaks and needs to be replaced, one party will purchase the replacement, and retain ownership after the marriage dissolves.
“Item three—”
He interrupted her. “Sarah, I don’t think we need to go through this point by point,” he said, exasperation in his voice.
“Oh, but we do,” she assured him, and rattled off everything they’d already agreed to, and then began the new things. “Item twenty-eight—Donovan will take out the garbage. If he will not be home early enough to get the garbage out he must verbally inform Sarah that she will need to do the job.”
“Sarah, there is no way that needs to be in the prenup. It’s common sense that if I can’t do it you will.” This time there was more than a little exasperation in his voice; there was a ton.
She’d planned on picking a fight and it was working. The thought gave her no satisfaction, though.
“No, it’s not.” she argued. “You said we needed everything written down. And I want everything.”
“I didn’t mean we had to include my willingness to go to dinner at your parents once a week when they get home from Europe.”
‘‘They’ll want to get to know you,” she said.
“Sarah, all you’d have to do is ask and I’d come.”
“But you’re the one who insisted we put everything down. It’s not as if we love each other, and have the trust that accompanies that.” Saying the words broke her heart just a little more.
She forced herself to continue. “We’ve become friends, or at least I’d thought so until right now, but still, you were right. It should all be in writing.”
“Even the part about my putting my dirty clothes in the hamper?” he asked.
“I tripped over your towel,” she said primly.
“It was in my bathroom,” he said.
“Which I was cleaning. Bathrooms are my job,” she said.
“Another little prenup condition. What item number was that?”
“Seventeen, I think. Do you want me to check?”
“No. I don’t think you need to put household tasks in the agreement.”
“Well, you’re doing the vacuuming and dusting and cooking, and we’re splitting the kitchen cleanup, so it stands to reason that—”
“I don’t want to be reasonable, and I’m tired of putting all these clauses and conditions in what was supposed to be a simple prenuptial agreement.” He drained his wine and set the glass down with enough force that Sarah jumped.
“Don’t you see, there’s nothing simple about this situation?” That’s what her new absurd terms were supposed to show. He didn’t realize how truly complex this had become...at least for her. Marrying a man she loved—a man who didn’t love her—it didn’t get more complex than that.
“It could be simple if you’d let it.”
“Maybe I don’t want to let it,” she said. “Maybe I don’t want it to be simple. Maybe I feel that a marriage should be work. And if the only work I can make you do is a prenup, well then there it is.”
“I don’t understand you,” he said, his tone harsh and hard.
“I know,” she said sadly. And she wasn’t about to explain it all to him.
“Fine. You want to add new terms? Nit-picky little terms? Then let’s address what happened with Mackenzie today. I want to add a condition to the prenup. No flirting with other men.”
“I wasn’t flirting,” she said. “He was using me to make Amelia jealous.”
“No way. Those two can’t stand each other.”
“You said that before, and you were wrong. That’s what they’d both like you to think."
“You’re crazy and you’re changing the subject. I’m adding that term.”
“Fine. But I’m not done with my terms. Item number, oh, I don’t know what number it is, but every Tuesday we eat at Taco Bell.”
“What?” he asked, his pen frozen. “You’re putting Taco Bell into a prenup? Sarah, that’s absurd.”
“And Christmases,” she said, ignoring his argument, and ignoring the pain that was growing so strong in her chest that she thought her heart might just explode. “We haven’t talked about where to spend the holidays.”
“I’m not dividing our holidays between my family and yours in a prenup.”
“And Disney World,” she said, still ignoring him. “I want to go. In the fall. You’re not writing. Start writing. In the fall. Late September’s a slow time. We’ll stay at the Polynesian of course.”
“Sarah, I’m not writing all this down.” He tossed the pad and pen down into the middle of the table and folded his arms over his chest “This is over.”
“And I want you to write down that you’ll never drink so much you’d lose your leg. That even if you did, I’d never use that as a reason to leave. That—” She realized she was crying. That was the last thing she wanted to do.
“What is this all about?” he asked, his voice suddenly softer.
“I can’t do it Donovan. I’m so sorry.” Tears were rolling down her cheeks, but she simply let them fall and concentrated on getting the words out. “I really thought I could. But I can’t. I was picking a fight but I don’t want to end this way. It seemed like a good idea this afternoon, but not now. I just can’t marry you. Blame it on me. Tell everyone you tried—which you did—but I was unreasonable. Which I was. I already packed up my clothes.”
“You already packed?” he asked. “What was this, your way of illustrating a point? If so, I don’t get it.”
“I...I have to go. That’s the only point you need to get.”
“Sarah.”
“Listen, Donovan, we can’t even agree on what we’re putting in a prenuptial agreement. How on earth do you expect us to be able to agree on anything in the marriage?”
“It’s not the same,” he said.
“It is. Essentially we’re strangers.”
“Strangers? You’ve been living with me for almost a month. I know things about you. I know you cry when you watch old movies, and th
at Back Street is your favorite. I know you have a fondness for sunsets, and for seagulls, despite the fact they’re nothing more than flying rats.”
“They’re beautiful,” she whispered.
“I know you love your family. I know you’re independent and determined. I know that you’re a wonderful decorator, and because of that I know that By Design will prosper and flourish.”
“Thanks to you and the introductions you’ve made,” she said. “But all that aside, and no matter how grateful I am for everything you’ve done for me, I don’t think this is going to work. You do know a lot about me, but there are still things you don’t know, and I don’t think you’ll ever know.”
‘‘You could teach me.”
She shook her head, sadly. “No. There are things you can’t teach. And I’ve learned enough about you to know that you’re not someone who likes to be told things. When Leland told you that you needed to balance your life, you bristled.”
“I have a plan. It’s not as if I plan to make work the center of my life forever. It’s just that my parents taught me that a career and a family don’t mix. I want to wait until my career is solid and I can cut back on work before I commit to a family.”
“When will it be solid enough, Donovan?” Sarah sighed. “I know you’ve got your life all figured out. And I’m not really a part of that plan. I’m just a detour you’re taking until you can get on with what it is you really want. And Donovan, I’ve discovered I can’t be a detour.”
Her heart was breaking. She swore she could feel it severing within her chest. Could a person bleed to death because of a broken heart? She was about to find out because she had to finish the job.
“I’m leaving,” she said.
“I don’t want you to go.”
“But I have to. If I stay, if I were to do this, we’d end up hating each other.”
“I could never hate you,” he said softly.
“That’s what you say, but you could. You would. I’m going.”
“Sarah, please don’t go.”
She leaned down and kissed him. “I’m sorry.”
She dropped the ring on the table.
The sound echoed in her mind as she walked out the door.
Chapter Ten
THE NEXT EVENING, Sarah massaged her aching shoulder. She wasn’t looking forward to trying to sleep on her sleeper-sofa again tonight. The boulder had grown while she was away and one night sleeping on it was more than enough.
But the lump in the middle of the bed wasn’t nearly as big as the unexpected lump that formed in her throat when she started the fight with Donovan last night. That lump in her throat had sunk and stuck somewhere around the fragments of her heart.
She’d been engaged to a man she hardly knew and then was stupid enough to fall in love with him.
Oh, how dumb could a girl get?
Not much dumber.
What was she going to do now?
Pick up and get on with her life. She had a business to build, and...
Well, she’d learned her lesson from Donovan. She was going to forget everything else, and focus on what mattered...her career.
She could control her business, but it seemed she couldn’t control her heart. It had a mind of its own, and it had decided on Donovan.
There was a loud thump at the door.
Sarah put her head under the pillow. It wasn’t even seven o’clock yet. And that meant whoever was at the door wasn’t a client or potential client, so she didn’t have to answer it
But the thumping continued and escalated in volume.
Grumbling, she got out of bed, tossed a sweatshirt on over the T-shirt and sweats she’d worn to bed, and got the door.
“Pearly? What’s up?” she asked with a yawn.
The older lady looked her over and asked, “What are you doing here, and not at home?”
“This is my home,” Sarah said.
Pearly pushed past her into the room. “You live with Donovan.”
“Lived with. Past tense.” Sarah let the door thump closed.
“So, you didn’t pay any attention to poor Lerlene’s lesson, did you?” Pearly asked.
“No I didn’t. But I paid attention to you. You’re happy in your singleness, and I’m sure I will be, too. It just gives me more time to focus on my business.”
“Hmm, that’s what you say, but for some reason, I don’t believe you.”
“Pearly, I don’t want to be rude, but it doesn’t matter what you believe. I believe it. Breaking up with Donovan was for the best.”
“Okay. If you say so.”
“I do. I mean, he didn’t love me. They call him the Iceman, and with good reason. His heart is frozen solid and I couldn’t thaw it.”
“He looked rather hot-blooded when he was around you.” Pearly just stared at her, studying her. Looking for something.
Sarah wasn’t sure what the older woman was looking for, and she didn’t care. “What you saw in Donovan’s eyes was lust I want more than that I want—”
“What do you want, Sarah?”
“Love. I wanted love, and that was the one thing he couldn’t give me.” She started to cry. She’d sworn she wouldn’t, but she did. Pearly wrapped her arms around her, and Sarah allowed her friend to hold her tight. She stood in the middle of By Design being held by Pearly as she sobbed.
“Are you sure? About Donovan’s feelings?” Pearly asked.
“Sure, I’m sure. He’s never said he loved me.”
“Ah, but has he showed you? Has he put your feelings first, tried to make you happy?”
She thought about it, then answered slowly, “Well, yes.”
“And I’ll attest to the fact that when the two of you were in a room together, you were the only woman he saw.”
Sarah scoffed.
‘‘Truly. And Amelia told me about his little jealous temper tantrum over Mac and tacos.”
“He wasn’t jealous,” Sarah said.
“No? Then what was that?”
“We had a deal...part of the prenup. No flirting with other people.”
“According to Amelia, you weren’t flirting with Mac, he was flirting with you.”
“No. He was trying to make her jealous.”
“There’s that, too,” Pearly said with a laugh. “Don’t think we haven’t noticed it. But he was doing it by flirting with you. Why would that bother Donovan if he didn’t care?”
Sarah pulled back and sniffed. “Donovan was just...”
“Just?”
“Oh, I don’t know. But I know he doesn’t love me.”
“Did I ever tell you about the big library fine I got last year?”
“Library fine?” Oh, gosh, here it came...another Pearly story.
“Yeah, I’d borrowed War and Peace and told myself it was time to get some culture. Well, six months later, it was still sitting on my nightstand, gathering dust. Every night, I started it, and every night I ended up with a romance in my hand instead. I love romances. I love that two people learn to look past the masks we all wear and see what’s really inside. If I thought you’d looked past Donovan’s mask, I’d shut up. But I don’t think you have.”
“Pearly, let me guarantee you that even if I peeled back his mask, all I’d find is a man who’s focused on his career. I was just another stepping-stone.”
“Did you ever tell him how you felt?” Pearly asked.
“No. He didn’t want to talk about things like feelings. He wanted to talk about business and prenups. That’s what we talked about.”
“Listen, I paid my library fine, and admitted that I know what I like. It’s not what’s good for me, it’s what feels right. You’re afraid to admit to yourself Donovan’s right for you.”
“That’s not the question. The question is, am I right for him?” Tears started to flow again as she admitted, “And the answer’s no.”
“Girl, you got me so flubbergusted—”
“Flubbergusted?”
“Shh. You’ve got me
so riled I can’t even think of a story. Don’t tell Josie, she’d never let me live it down. I’m leaving, but I’m going to tell you that love is too precious to let it slip through your fingers.”
“Like Lerlene and Trubald.”
Pearly shook her head. “No, like you and Donovan. You’re both afraid to tell the other what you’re feeling.”
~~~
Donovan was going to win Sarah back.
This was it, he thought as he fingered the ring— her ring—that sat in front of him on his desk.
He’d argued any number of cases, and won a huge percentage, but he’d never been so terrified of losing a fight.
Because he didn’t know what he’d do without Sarah. Somehow he was going to make her see that marrying him was to her advantage. And once he had that ring on her finger, he was going to romance her into loving him.
When she’d left, he realized that he wasn’t worried at all about his promotion. He didn’t care if he made partner. It didn’t matter. What mattered was Sarah. Her leaving had left a hole in his heart, and he knew he’d never fill it without her.
He needed her.
She was a part of him.
In those few short weeks, she’d fit neatly into his life, filling up parts he’d never realized were empty, until she’d come along. He was aching with the emptiness now that she was gone.
He wanted her back. Not because it made sense business-wise, but because...
He loved her.
It was that simple.
He loved Sarah. Maybe he’d loved her right from the start. Maybe that’s why asking her to marry him hadn’t just seemed prudent, but had seemed right.
She was right for him.
And he was right for her.
She might not know it yet, but she would.
He had a few plans to make, and then he was going to catch his wife.
He put the ring in his pocket, ready to go find the woman he loved. Before he could get up, the door opened. Sarah burst into the house.
“Do you still want to marry me?” she asked without preamble.
“Yes. I—”
A Day Late and a Bride Short Page 12