Love Me to Death

by Sharlay

  “You’re adorable. Anyway, listen I better get going before Jerry comes to find me but I miss you.”

  “I miss you too. Have a good day. And have fun with Kay-Lee,” she chuckles.

  “Not funny. Anyway, I’m sending kisses to you and the bump. See you when I get home. Love you.”

  “Love you too.”

  “I love you more,” I say before hanging up.

  Gosh, those calls make my day. Things have not been easy since that first day in the hospital when we found out Ned was pregnant but somehow we’ve gotten through it. It’s made us stronger in so many ways. The further she gets the more time we have to spend in the hospital which sucks but I’d rather know that she is getting the best care. I don’t know how she does it, though. She’s so brave. Since that first night in the hospital, she hasn’t mentioned anything about her health. Everything is about the baby. It’s one of the many reasons I love her. She has this ability to put people’s needs before her own and it’s not an act because she never wavers. Ever.

  “How’s Ned?” Jerry calls across the bar as I walk through the doors of Maceys.

  “She’s good.”

  “Did you guys just have phone sex or something because the smile on your face is creepy as hell?” She quizzes.

  “Wouldn’t you like to know?” I wink as I round the bar.

  “Actually, no, but I know someone that would,” she nods her head across the room and my eyes fall on Kay-Lee who is smiling at me.

  “Don’t remind me,” I mumble.

  “Oh yes, Terrence said to tell you that you have two weeks vacation as of Monday,” she says casually as she bends down and starts to stock the fridges.

  “What? Why?”

  “Not the usual response I get to that sentence.” She grins as she looks up at me.

  “Not to sound ungrateful but I kind of need the money right now.”

  “Did I mention that you’ll still get paid?”

  I look at her in utter confusion.

  “Am I missing something here?”

  “Yes, the bit where you celebrate.”

  “Sorry, it’s just that I don’t understand why.”

  “He likes you that’s why plus you work your ass off when you’re here. You deserve it. Enjoy today’s shift and then go home and spoil that pregnant girlfriend of yours.”

  I smile at Jerry. She’s the most straight-talking woman I know. Sometimes a little too straight talking but I like her. We pretty much hit it off from my first trial shift. I let them know about Ned’s situation as soon as I started and I informed them that I didn’t plan on missing any of her hospital appointments. I thought her and Terrence were going to tell me to go home right there, and then but to my surprise they offered me the job as soon as my trial shift ended. There was no explanation other than Terrence patting me on the back and saying I like you, kid, you’re an honest guy. Then he walked off and that was the end of it. Here I am; the job’s mine and all is good.

  “I think I will,” I say.

  “Good, now get back to work before I fire you.”

  “Yes, sir.” I salute as I head to the kitchen to grab some more drinks to stock the fridge.

  “Very funny.”

  Today went slower than usual. Maybe it was because I was eager to get home and tell Ned about my vacation. It meant that we could really spend some time together. Most of our time together is mainly spent in between hospital visits which kind of sucks. Terrence has been real cool, though. He always gives me the time off so I can attend, that’s why I was so surprised when Jerry said he was giving me this vacation. I know Ned will be happy.

  I’m just hoping she will be awake when I get back. She’s on quite a lot of meds at the moment and some of them seem to make her a bit drowsy and I hate the days when I get in to find her sleeping especially since she’s the first person I want to share my day with. I slip my phone out of my pocket and dial her number.

  She picks up after the second ring. “Ned Waters, how can I help you?”

  “That’s the fake voice you used the first day I called about the ‘audition.’” I chuckle.

  “Do I sound intellectual?”

  “Nope but you sound awake which is a good sign. I’ll be home in ten, think you can stay awake till then? I’ve got good news and I come bearing gifts.”

  “Oh, I always have the energy for gifts.”

  “Good, see you soon.”

  “Ok.”

  My phone rings before I get the chance to put it back in my pocket. I smile when I see a picture of Layla, Alex, and Sophie pop up.

  “Hey, Sis,” I beam as I answer her call.

  “I’m not your sister, silly. I’m your niece.” My smile widens at the sound of Sophie’s voice.

  “Are you sure? I’m pretty sure this is my sister’s phone,” I tease.

  “No.” She giggles. “I’m Sophie!”

  “No, I’m sorry but I don’t know anyone called Sophie.”

  “Yes, you do! It’s me! Mommy, Uncle Bwennan’s being silly!”

  “He does that a lot,” I hear Layla say in the background.

  “Uncle Bwennan, it’s me!”

  “Who’s me? I thought your name was Sophie?”

  “It is!”

  “Well I only know one Sophie but her name is Princess Sophie and she lives in a magic castle.”

  “I am Princess Sophie!” She squeals.

  “Oh, forgive me, your highness. I didn’t realize it was you. You forgot to use your royal title.”

  She giggles loudly.

  “I’m fwour years old and I’m Princess Sophie, silly.”

  “Well, it’s lovely to speak to you Princess Sophie, how is Prince Alex?”

  “He’s ok, he did a big poop and now he’s sleeping.”

  “Oh my, which one of the palace servants did you get to clean up the poop?”

  “Daddy.” She chuckles.

  “Good answer, kid.” Layla laughs. “Say bye now.”

  “Bye now,” she shouts before Layla’s voice fills my ear.

  “Hey, Bro,” she says as she laughs.

  “What an elegant princess.”

  “She takes after her royal uncle.”

  “What an excellent role model,” I say.

  “Mmm, well that’s a matter of opinion.”

  “Ouch.”

  “How are you?”

  “I’m good … great now that I’ve heard from you guys,” I say honestly.

  “Yeah, it’s been a little while, we miss you guys. How’s Ned doing?”

  “She’s great, Lay. She still looks beautiful.”

  “I’m not surprised. I’ve been meaning to visit but I wanted to give you guys some time to yourself.”

  “Thanks, how’s Jamie?”

  “Jamie is Jamie, you know. He’s not back from work yet which reminds me that I need to get dinner started.”

  “Lucky him. I need to train Ned, these days I come home to find her sleeping on the couch.”

  “Ned is not the kind of woman you can train and besides would you have it any other way?”

  “Hell no … I live for those moments.” Staring at Ned while she sleeps are some of my favorite times.

  “I still can’t believe my baby brother is in love and having a baby! It’s so freaking cute.”

  “What’s fweaking, Mommy?” Sophie’s voice calls.

  “Yeah, that’s my cue to go.” Layla chuckles. “You sound well, Bren and happy.”

  “I am.”

  “Good, I love you.”

  “Love you, too,” I say before hanging up.

  By the time I get back to the penthouse I find Ned lying on the couch watching one of her rom-com movies. I roll my eyes and switch the TV off with the remote.

  “Hey! I was watching that.”

  “It can wait.”

  She scowls. I hold up the bag in my hand and wave it in the air.

  “Really? Because I brought chicken.”

  “Best. Boyfriend. Ever,” she sque
als as she jumps to her feet and grabs the bag from me. I smile as she retreats into the kitchen like a woman on a mission. She already has a piece of chicken in her mouth by the time I walk in.

  “Mmmm, this is sooooo good,” she says as she takes another bite.

  “I would have never guessed by the way your mouth is ripping it to shreds like that.”

  “Don’t judge me besides the baby loves it.”

  I laugh.

  “Babe, I can’t believe you’re using our unborn child to cover up your sick addiction to food.”

  “Shut up and grab me some barbecue sauce.” I shake my head and laugh. I grab the sauce and slide it along the counter toward her.

  “Happy?” I ask with raised eyebrows as she squirts some onto her piece of chicken.

  “Very.” She grins.

  “Good because I have more good news.”

  “Really?” she replies with her mouth full.

  “You are really lucky that I already love you because that right there is gross,” I say pointing at her.

  “What?” She looks utterly confused.

  “Speaking while your mouth is full of food … gross.”

  She laughs.

  “It’s no worse than how you eat, Mr. Spit and Chomp.”

  Now I laugh.

  “Babe, I’m a dude, I’m supposed to eat like this.”

  “So sexist.”

  “I call it as I see it; now do you want this news or not?”

  “Yeah, yeah give it to me,” she says. I raise my eyebrows. “Not that kind of ‘give it to me’! Your mind is always in the gutter, Cole.”

  “Believe me, my mind was not in the gutter. It was in a much better place.” I wink. “Anyway, Terrence has given me two weeks paid vacation.”

  “Why?”

  “I have no idea. Jerry gave me some excuse about how hard I work but I think he’s trying to give us more time to spend together.”

  “He’s a good guy, isn’t he,” Ned says smiling. I owe Terrence for putting that look on her face.

  “He is, yes. So I’m going to be spending two weeks making sure you are the happiest woman alive.”

  I walk toward her and pull her into my arms.

  “You already do that,” she whispers.

  “Well then, I’ll do it better,” I say before kissing her lips. “Gosh, you taste like chicken.”

  She shoves me in the chest before laughing.

  “You really know how to make a girl feel good, don’t you?”

  “I know how to make my girl feel good. Apparently by buying her chicken to devour.” She laughs again before pausing for a moment and looking down at the half eaten bag of chicken.

  “Oh my gosh, did you want some?”

  I start laughing at the look on her face. I shake my head as I walk closer to her.

  “Nope, I’m good. I just wanted to see you happy.”

  I wrap my arms around her waist again and pull her closer.

  “I am happy … very happy … deliriously happy.” She smiles as she snakes her arms around my neck and stands on her tiptoes so she can kiss my lips. “You know, we’ve become one of those cheesy couples from one of my romance novels,” she whispers against my lips.

  “So what you’re basically saying is that I am book boyfriend material?”

  “You’re better.” She smiles.

  “I want that in writing as evidence in case you try to deny it. So I’m up in the hall of fame with the rest of the book boyfriends of today then?” I ask happily.

  “No, because you’re real. They’re a little more perfect. You’re flawed.”

  “I thought they were flawed too?”

  “They are but in a fictionally perfect kind of way. You’re human flawed … you’re real.”

  “Is that supposed to be a compliment?” I say pulling her closer.

  “Yes, I find your flaws incredibly sexy.”

  “Is it weird that you finding my flaws sexy actually turns me on?” I ask as I smirk at her.

  “Being with you has forced me to make weird my new normal.”

  “Works for me,” I say as I lift her onto the island and step between her thighs. “Gosh, I want to get you pregnant all over again.”

  “See what I mean? That is so weird.” She shakes her head.

  “You like weird,” I say before kissing her lips.

  “No, I like you and you just happen to be weird.”

  “You like me huh?”

  “Very, very much.” She nods.

  “Enough to marry me?” I ask as my lips brush hers.

  “What?” she gasps as she pulls back and looks at me.

  “Not quite the answer I was hoping for.” I chuckle.

  “I don’t understand.”

  “Understand that I love you and I want you to have the same name as our child. Neddie Cole. Damn that sounds hot.”

  She looks perplexed.

  “Are you asking me to marry you?”

  “Kind of. This isn’t a formal proposal; this is just me making sure that if I ever decide to ask you in public, in the most romantic way ever, you’ll say yes.”

  Her head falls back and she laughs loud.

  “Freddy, the ego is here isn’t he?”

  “He is. So is that a provisional yes then? Because I am going to marry you, babe. One day.”

  “So, technically you’ve already answered for me.” She has a little smile on her face.

  “Yes but just in case, I need to check that you are not going to embarrass me and Freddy when we’re down on one knee.”

  She laughs again.

  “You’ll just have to wait and find out.”

  “You mean, mean little woman.”

  “Just call me Christina Grey.” She winks.

  “That was sexy,” I breathe. “No more talking. We’re getting married … the end. Now lie back so I can make love to you.”

  “Yes, sir,” she teases.

  “Sorry little guy this is going to be a bumpy ride.”

  “Eww, don’t talk to the baby about sex and I already told you it’s a girl!”

  I just laugh and then I make love to her several times. Yep, that was definitely a bumpy ride … sorry little guy!

  12 weeks into pregnancy … end of the first trimester …

  The doctors say our baby can form a fist now.

  On the bad days, Ned is so weak she can barely lift her hands. On a good day, she can form a fist too.

  27 weeks into pregnancy … end of the second trimester …

  The doctors told us that our baby can store fat now and that it will have gained quite a bit of weight.

  On the good days, Ned and I go out to eat. We’ve even been back to Paradiso despite her constant protests that we can’t go back since I embarrassed her there when we last visited. On the bad days, Ned can’t even drink, she’s lost a lot of weight.

  Ned doesn’t get to the end of the third trimester … she goes into labor. Early.

  Everything is too loud. My head is spinning but my eyes still manage to stay focused on Ned. She’s in pain, I can see it … I can hear it.

  Dr. Chen said there would be a lot of people present if Ned went into labor on her own before her scheduled C-section, but I didn’t really stop to think how many. I certainly didn’t expect it to be this many. My eyes keep flitting from Ned to the heart monitor, to every expression in the room. Everywhere I turn I see a panicked expression. These doctors are supposed to know what they are doing but they all look terrified. They keep repeating the fact that “Ned is high risk” and that “this time is critical for the baby.” They keep reminding us how well Neddie has done to make it this far. They tell us how strong she is being but they never talk about the future. Everything is now and then … no one will dare to talk about after.

  They probably think I don’t notice but I do. I can hear the uncertainty in their voices and the doubt in their faces but I refuse to believe it because I can’t.

  I did propose to Ned and she said yes. Thank Go
d. That would have been pretty embarrassing for both me and Freddy. I did it at Paradiso. She was utterly embarrassed again, just the way I wanted it. I invited all of our family and friends to witness. They were all there. Misty and Bobby (who, yes are dating, it seems like a lot happened when Ned and I went to Paris), Ned’s parents, Layla, Jamie, Alex, and Sophie. I even invited my dad and Jerkson. Ned cried and it was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. The idea that this woman has agreed to spend the rest of her life loving me is still sinking in. That she wants to make a promise before God to love me and only me does something inside of me that I literally can’t explain. So, you see she has to pull through this because we’re not married yet and I promised her that I am going to make her my wife. I promised her that night. I don’t make promises — not lightly — and I don’t break them. So, I don’t give a damn about the doctors’ expressions right now because I’m going to marry this woman.

  I am dragged out of my thoughts when I hear the word push practically screamed. My eyes snap to Ned right before she lets out a guttural scream, squeezes my hand and then pushes. I feel like we have been here, in this room forever. I take my free hand and smooth Ned’s hair out of her face.

  “You’re doing great, baby.” I smile at her.

  She’s crying but she nods her head at my words. She squeezes my hand tighter. It hurts but I ignore it.

  I’m getting used to the sound of the heart monitor in the background. It’s become a dull pattern I can hear in the back of my mind. It’s like a broken record on repeat and so as soon as the pattern changes even just a little bit I recognize it. So does everyone else in the room. My eyes fall on the machine and I am angry. Why the hell did you change your pattern?! I scream in my mind. Songs don’t do that. They don’t just change their pattern in the middle of playing. There is a rhythm you stick to, a flow that keeps the listener tuned in but the machine just screwed it up.

  Everything was planned out perfectly. The date was set for Ned to have a C-section. Dr. Chen already explained about the pressures of labor on the heart. The C-section wasn’t exactly the safer option since you are asking a body with a weak heart to undergo surgery. It was just the lesser of two evils. But fate wasn’t in tune with our plans. Fate saw fit to allow Ned’s water — how ironic — to break and to fast track her labor. By the time we got here she was too far gone for surgery. Well, thank you, fate!