by Rachel Cross
Sounded reasonable. “Well, that’s right.”
“Is Maddy watching over me?”
“No. She’s in Virginia, not … not dead.”
“Will she come back?”
“Yes, honey, she’ll come back to us.”
“Tomorrow?”
“Uh … no.”
The tears started flowing again and Asher handed her the little satin blanket.
“She’s never coming back to me, is she?” Ella said around her thumb.
“She is, Ella. I promise.”
“When?”
“In a few days.”
“Can I see her?”
“Sure, we’ll FaceTime with her in the morning.”
“Is it morning now?”
He checked the clock on the dresser. “Honey, she’s still sleeping.”
“Please?”
“I don’t want to wake her. In a few hours, we’ll call her on my phone where we can see her too, okay?”
He settled her back against the pillow and rolled out of the bed.
“Uncle Asher?”
“Yes?”
Solemn, brown, tired eyes looked up into his. “Are you going to leave me, too?”
The hollow pit in his stomach burgeoned.
God.
“No, Ella. I’ll always be here for you,” he choked out.
But despite a call to Maddy the next morning and Asher’s best efforts to wear Ella out with a trip to the beach, the same scenario repeated itself the next night.
The next afternoon, he sat on the couch with his laptop, eavesdropping on Ella’s play with her ponies. Sure enough, the animals were enacting concerns about the missing Maddy.
Asher put his laptop down and went into the next room to call the therapist.
The woman sighed. “Yes. We discussed this possibility. She’s bonded with Maddy and she’s afraid of losing her. It’s normal.”
“What can I do?”
“Not much, I’m afraid.”
“Then what’s the best thing at this point?” he asked.
“Well, obviously the best thing for Ella would be for Maddy to come back but — ”
“I can’t do that to her. She has Christmas plans — ”
“ — or for you to go to her.”
He hadn’t considered that. He stared at the tree with all the presents Justin had wrapped lying under it. Pack all that up and fly to D.C.? He smiled. “I’ll give her a call.” Moments later he dialed Maddy’s cell phone.
“Asher? How’s Ella?”
“Up the last two nights, having some trouble. Therapist thinks — ”
“I’ll come back. Can you get me a flight today?”
“How about we come to you?”
There was a long pause.
“Oh. Okay.”
“We can rent a house.”
She laughed. “Asher, I live in Podunk. There aren’t houses for rent here and the only motel is a dump. You’ll stay with us.”
“Oh, no. We couldn’t do that.”
“My mom will insist. I insist.”
“Really, Maddy, I don’t think — ”
“Asher, please, there’s a spare bedroom and Maddy can bunk with me.”
He ignored the traitorous leap in his chest.
“Well, just … check with her, okay?”
“Don’t need to. She’ll be thrilled.”
“Okay. We’ll be there later today, I’ll arrange the flight.”
He hung up the phone as Justin walked in. “Asher, I’m headed out in a few hours. Any last minute stuff you need?”
Asher grinned. “As a matter of fact, there is.”
• • •
“Let’s go out for breakfast.” Asher rubbed his hands together and playfully winked at Maddy. She looked good in her mother’s cheerful kitchen. Relaxed and happy. He was glad to be here and Ella was beyond excited. It was the right thing.
“Yeah!” Ella answered.
Maddy leaned against the kitchen counter. Her mother waved her hands. “Not me, I have too much to do this morning.”
“Please, Mrs. Anderson.” Ella begged.
Maddy’s mom laughed. “No, little monkey,” she replied. “I’ll see you when you get home and we’ll play Candyland with candy, okay?”
Ella squealed.
There were only two breakfast places in town, so Maddy directed him to her favorite. Asher glanced around the place. Spade had eaten a lot of meals in small town diners like this one when they were starting out and touring in a bus.
He glanced up as a weathered, bottle blonde approached the table. She made eye contact and smiled coquettishly.
“Incoming,” he whispered.
He never expected the expression of loathing that crossed her face, quickly masked by a polite smile.
What have we here?
“Kimberly Klaus, Asher and Ella Lowe,” Maddy said, tonelessly.
The woman slid into the booth next to Maddy, across from Asher and extended her hand to him with barely a glance in Maddy’s direction.
“Pleased to meet you both, and welcome to Pembrook,” Kimberly drawled, showing all of her perfect white teeth to Asher.
Ella went back to her coloring.
“Coffee, Deirdre,” Kimberly called over to the woman behind the counter.
“I understand congratulations are in order,” Maddy said, softly.
Kimberly glanced at Maddy, her cold eyes assessing, finally coming to rest on Maddy’s hand gripping her coffee cup. The woman wrinkled her nose and her mouth turned down in distaste.
Asher clenched his hand into a fist under the table. What a bitch.
Maddy straightened her spine and turned her attention to Ella’s drawing.
“Thanks,” the woman replied, her attention already back on Asher.
“For?” Asher asked idly, taking a sip of his coffee.
Maddy gave a little negative shake of her head and ducked her head to hide a smile.
“I just got married,” the woman said, breezily.
“Congratulations,” Asher said. “Now,” he said, leaning toward her. “Get your bony ass out of my booth,” he whispered, expression deadly.
Kimberly reared back, hand to her throat, already scooting out off the cushion with her purse clutched to her side. With a glare at a dumbfounded Maddy, she flounced down the aisle and out of the diner.
Deirdre came over, orthopedic shoes squeaking as she walked. “Whatever you’re having, it’s on the house.” She winked at Asher, pen hovering over her pad. “I don’t know what you said, mister, but we’re always glad to see the back of that one. Good to have you home, Maddy. You know your momma likes to make sure you’re takin’ good care of yourself.”
The two women exchanged smiles.
Ella glanced at the adults from her study of the laminated menu. “I like this restaurant,” she confided. “It’s got crayons, coloring pages and a menu with pictures.”
Deirdre nodded. “Thank you, little lady. What’ll ya’ have?”
Ella turned to Asher once the waitress walked away.
“Was that a mean woman?”
Asher frowned. “No honey, she seems like a perfectly nice woman.”
Maddy merely lifted her shoulders and deliberately widened her eyes.
“Not the waitress, Uncle Asher, the woman who sat next to Maddy.”
Ah, his niece saw more than he thought.
“She is a mean woman, and I don’t want her sour face interfering with my breakfast and giving me indigestion.”
“Oh,” Ella considered this. “What’s ingestion?�
�
“An upset stomach.”
“Can people make your tummy upset?” Ella queried.
Maddy responded with a heartfelt affirmative.
Ella went back to her picture.
Asher sized up Maddy, who met his gaze evenly.
“Queen of the mean girls,” Maddy stated.
Ella’s crayon stilled.
“New husband?”
“Everyone likes the first Mrs. Klaus,” she replied, nodding at Deirdre. “Case in point.”
Ella seemed completely disinterested in the adult conversation, but he noticed Maddy was keeping a watchful eye.
Maddy gave him a small smile. “I don’t approve you know.”
Asher gave her his best innocent expression.
“Word travels fast in a small town,” she warned.
“So?” He shrugged, picking up his mug. “People will give me a wide berth.”
She almost spit out her coffee. “Ha! You wish. That wasn’t what I meant. Handing Kimberly her walking papers? She’ll blab to whoever will listen. They’re probably building a statue of you in the square as we speak.”
“It’s that bad?”
“It’s only been a few months, but Kimberly is definitely the villain.”
“Not Mr. Klaus?” he asked.
“Most people just think there’s no fool like an old fool and give him a pass.”
“What’s your issue with the Queen of Mean?”
Ella’s gaze came up from her coloring, hopeful.
“It’s just an expression, sweetie, there’s no queen,” Maddy confessed.
Ella went back to her drawing.
“I don’t want to get into it,” she stated firmly, meeting Asher’s gaze directly.
His eyes dropped to her scarred hands.
Her expression turned rueful. “Yeah, not so nice about these.” She shook her hands. “Character building,” she stated. “Besides, most people were incredibly supportive and kind.”
“But not your peers, led by that.”
“There were some tough times, but that was long ago.”
He could tell she was downplaying the bullying she’d been subjected to because of her rheumatoid arthritis. The idea of her being taunted while in pain made his stomach churn. He forced himself to relax his fists.
Chapter 11
“Damn, this place is a pain in the ass to get to,” Shane complained, rubbing his freezing hands together and stepping over the threshold with a shiver.
“Come on in,” Asher responded drily.
“Seriously man, three connecting flights, the ride from hell over a mountain pass in a crappy rental. It was harrowing, I tell you. Still, it beats going back to LA for the holidays and being holed up avoiding the paparazzi. Got any Scotch?”
Ella came running to the door and enveloped Shane in a hug.
“Hey, sweetheart!” Shane was good with kids — probably from all the time he spent in that boy band ten years ago. Playing to tweens and younger must have taught him a thing or two about interacting with the Nickelodeon set. It hadn’t escaped his notice that Ella always reacted to Shane with enthusiasm. Maybe children just gravitated toward some people. Like Maddy and her mother, Shane was a natural. It was good to have him there, no matter the circumstances.
Shane was as boy next door as Asher was bad boy rocker. Clean cut, blond, blue-eyed movie star handsome with a too perfect, too white smile, his surfer looks masked a quick wit and a self-depreciating nature. Many people made the mistake of underestimating him over the years, to their detriment.
Shane was routinely typecast in romantic comedies before landing his breakout role. But early promotion for his blockbuster coincided with his girlfriend pictured in a tabloid in a torrid embrace with her co-star in a movie filming in Canada. Hounded by the press, he needed a place to hide out until he went back to continue the junket for his opening in a few weeks.
After the introductions to Maddy and her mother were complete, the women resumed their tea party/Christmas movie with Ella while the two men went into the kitchen.
“How are you doing?” Asher opened the fridge and chucked a beer bottle to Shane.
“Eh.” Shane popped the top and took a long swallow.
“Did you know?” Asher asked.
“Let’s say I suspected. She had an excuse for staying up there since they’re past deadline on the film and she has almost no time off, but … ”
“You’ve been together, what? Six months?”
Shane nodded and finished the bottle.
“Long-term for you. But you don’t seem too broken up about it,” Asher said.
Shane’s lips twisted. “I’m not. I was into her when we started. But the separations have killed it. As usual.”
“Been there. Not fun.”
“Yeah. It’s just the way she did it, you know?”
“Has she called?”
“Yep. That’s how I had a chance to get here before all hell broke loose. Trust me, man, I’m not upset it’s over, but it sucks to have it all be so public.” He gave a humorless laugh.
Asher shook his head.
“I end things before they get ugly,” Shane said.
“Don’t we all?”
Shane nodded. “I know. Any talent in this town?” he asked hopefully.
“No. Keep it in your pants. It’s a small town. The mayor came to see me this morning to ask me to perform in the Christmas pageant.”
Shane’s mouth dropped open. Then he bent in half, laughing. When his chuckles died down he said, “I’m envisioning your tatted up ass wrapped in a robe with a rope for a belt and a staff.”
“A lowly shepherd? You wound me.”
Maddy came in to the kitchen and stood next to Asher. “What’s up?”
“I’m recruiting for the pageant, Maddy.”
Her eyes lit up. “Wonderful!! He’s a great actor, but can he sing?” she wondered aloud, giving Shane the once-over.
Asher choked on his laughter and Shane backed away, hands up in front of him.
“Shane thinks I’ve agreed to a part in the nativity play.”
“Really? No, that wouldn’t work. But a duet? How about Silent Night?”
Shane cast a “save me” plea at Asher, who laughed. “Do you need me to get the mayor back here to ask you? We get to be in the parade, too. Maddy wants me to wear leather pants.”
Shane snorted.
Maddy blushed. “Asher, it’s what people expect from a rock star.”
“Maddy, I’m not Elvis. I’ll freeze my nuts off!”
It was Shane’s turn to laugh.
“Are you really going to be in the pageant?” his friend finally asked.
“He’s going to sing and play guitar. Are you musical?”
Shane grinned at Maddy. “Yeah.”
“Maddy, Shane was in TruAchord.”
She stared at Shane for a moment, and Asher knew the moment the light dawned. “Wow!” she said eyes alight. “I loved TruAchord when I was a kid.”
Asher smirked at Shane’s pained expression. “That’s more enthusiasm than she mustered for Spade.”
Maddy gave Asher a gentle punch in the chest. “Not true. You know I love your music.”
“But you looooved TruAchord,” he mimicked.
“C’mon, Asher, every teeny bopper in Virginia loved TruAchord when I was growing up. No offense,” she said hurriedly, with a quick glance at Shane.
“I think it was better when she just thought of me as an actor and not a boy bander.”
“So, will you?” she asked, giving Shane a searching look.
“Don’t bother saying no,” Asher advised. “If
she doesn’t wear you down, the mayor and town council will come over — ”
“I’m game. Clearly I’ve done worse in my career.”
• • •
Christmas Eve Asher rose from his seat and went to the front of the church where a guitar lay in its case next to a chair. He strapped it on and took a deep breath. This was their “Blue Christmas” and he was playing the requisite Elvis tune.
People started forward to light candle in remembrance of loved ones they wouldn’t get to share the holiday with. He studied his hands, focusing on the song, not the townspeople making their way up the aisle. Halfway through the song, he saw Ella rise. She went forward with Maddy’s mom to light her candle for Delilah.
The grief nearly strangled him. He stopped singing and stared down at the instrument in his hands, as his fingers still automatically plucking out the chords.
Oh God. Not here. Not now.
He tried to force the waves of pain down, the way he always had before, but they kept coming. He lifted his head, his eyes searching for Maddy.
Maddy whispered something to Shane at her side, and as if in a dream he saw his friend rise from his seat, walk up to Asher and take the guitar. Without thinking, he bolted for the side door exit. Before the door shut behind him he heard Shane’s baritone pick up the chorus.
It was a cold night but he didn’t feel it. Didn’t feel anything but the howling, raging beast of grief that would no longer be suppressed. He looked up to discover he was at the edge of a cemetery, surrounded by death.
He spotted a bench in the shadow of a huge oak tree a few feet away and picked his way through tombstones to it. Hunching over, he covered his face with his hands. God. Nothing like having a public breakdown. It could be worse — it could’ve been LA.
He was so lost in his misery he didn’t even hear her approach. He smelled her though, and looked up to see her standing in front of him. He dropped his gaze back to his lap.
“Maddy,” his chest was so tight with the effort of holding in his rage and grief he could barely force the words out, “can you give me a minute?”
Her feet moved steps closer and her arms went around his shoulders. She yanked his head to her abdomen, her grip surprisingly strong and fierce. He gave a halfhearted struggle but ceased when her fingers resting on the top of his head slid down, massaging him from the top of his head to the base of his neck in sure, firm, strokes. Had anyone ever done this for him? His throat burned and he squeezed his eyes shut.