“Are you just thinking this through, or would you like my opinion?” he asked seriously.
“Go on, tell me what you think.” I had to laugh even though it didn’t really matter, this crazy time thing.
“We keep time for many reasons. There are important meetings to attend to, the occasional vacation or holiday, and of course, anniversaries, and birthdays.”
“I know, I know. I was just being facetious - in my mind.”
As we lay tangled together under the covers, the toasty warmth we produced eventually caused us to grow quiet and sleepy. I found myself daydreaming about Kelsey and Royal. If everything fell into place as I hoped it would, they could possibly be the next couple to celebrate a ceremony. They had been seeing each other ever since the day we went to London, and all the more so after Kelsey turned him that following week. I understood the special bond between them and I was glad that Emrys was able to turn his head and pretend he didn’t see it. It had to be impossible for him not to know, since his ability to read my mind had never lessened. I still didn’t understand why each society couldn’t just make their own rules, but until things changed, Kelsey was bound by them... even though I guessed that most of us at Ravenswynd knew their secret. It was nearly impossible to keep secrets in so small a world as ours, yet I never breathed a word to anyone.
Was that my imagination earlier tonight, or did I detect a change in Kelsey’s attitude? Jealousy, perhaps? Not that I blamed her, she had to wait until June before Emrys would meet with the Regents. The famous Fellowship of Regents. There goes that time-thing again. And more waiting.
For a group of eternal beings who had all the time in the world, and where time had little meaning, we sure spent a lot of time waiting! As my wandering mind relaxed I heard the gentle snore of my sleeping husband. His sweet breath blew soft on my cheek, his head occupied the same pillow as mine, and his warm electrical body enveloped me like a cocoon. I finally succeeded in letting go of my erratic mind, and as I drifted off to sleep I tried to imagine our up-coming trip to Scotland.
* * *
The day before we were to leave for our trip, it was Kelsey’s turn to “hang out” with me. Even though there was a guard posted just outside of our quarters, everyone said they felt better if someone stayed inside with me whenever Emrys was out of the suite. Emrys had planned to be in his downstairs office, busy with the final arrangements for our trip, making sure all would be taken care of in his absence. Kelsey remembered to bring along a book to read, though I doubted she’d ever really open it. She greeted us with a cheery hello, but I noticed that something seemed off in her voice, yet nothing I could put my finger on. She found me sitting in my favorite lounge chair, my book already open, and a tall glass of Ambrosia at my side.
Emrys gave me a quick good-bye kiss on the top of my head, but I didn’t stop reading. I just called out my wishes for him to have a nice day, thinking for sure, if I refused to look up at all, Kelsey would get the hint, and just sit down and relax. It was not to be.
I tried to keep reading, but in my peripheral vision I saw her pacing back and forth. She’d stop at the window and glance out, then return to the sofa and pick up her book for a second or two. After her third trip to the window I closed my book, making sure to hold a finger in place. Nothing frustrated me more than losing my page in a good novel. Well, other than the fact that no one seemed to be able to actually let me read these days.
“Kelsey, what is it?” I hoped my voice didn’t show too much annoyance. She was still fragile, though not quite as bad as when we’d first met.
She turned abruptly as though she was surprised that I noticed her edginess. “Nothing, Lizzy, I’m fine.” She shook her head and glanced back out of the window in a feeble attempt to not disturb me.
Too late for that…
I had the feeling that she wanted me to dig for more information, but I really did not feel like playing this game. If there was some problem she needed to talk about, she ought to just spit it out already. I picked up my book and started to open it. “Okay, just checking,” I said, hoping to sound matter-of-fact. And then, resting my arms in my lap, I tried to read.
After heaving a loud sigh, Kelsey plopped down on the sofa and picked up her book. I kept my face behind my novel, but in reality, couldn’t read any more. I had already read the same paragraph three times, and I couldn’t remember a thing. I was distracted and aware of every move she made. She stared at her book cover, turned it over and glanced fleetingly at the back. She set it down and jumped up again.
I couldn’t take it anymore, and it took every ounce of my will to not scream at her. Even though she was a good friend, an excellent assistant, and lovely in every way, her annoying actions were more than I could handle.
“What’s going on Kelsey?” My sharp tone probably showed how irritated I was now, but I no longer care. “Why can’t you just relax today?”
“Oh, sorry, Lizzy. I’m just a little worried.” She hesitated for only a moment. “I overheard one of the kitchen girls talking about Royal. I think she likes him and I’m afraid she may try to take him away from me. I mean, not that he’s mine…but...you know what I mean, don’t you?” She rubbed her temples as though she had a headache. I noticed then for the first time, what she was wearing. It was a black cardigan I’d seen many times before, but today it was covered with tiny white hairs. She saw me looking at it and threw her head back in disgust after glancing down at herself. “Oh, great. The puppy has managed to shed all over me again. I shouldn’t wear black when I’m around her. What was I thinking?”
I wondered if she’d ever get around to naming the puppy – the dog had seemed like such a good idea back when we first brought her home. Now that Kelsey was spending more time with Royal, the puppy didn’t seem to be number one on her list of priorities anymore. I was glad I’d only offered to take the dog when she was truly busy. I was not allowed to go out by myself anyway, and the tiny animal certainly was not the size or type that would frighten any rogue stalker away.
Kelsey brushed her sweater using both hands and groaned as her efforts were useless. I had not seen her so scattered like this in quite some time. As a matter of fact, since she and Royal had been together, she’d seemed more settled.
Until the green-eyed monster showed up.
“There’s a lint brush in my top drawer,” I said, pointing toward my bedroom - not that I had to; she helped me put laundry away and knew where everything was. Even though I didn’t require her to do these menial chores, she insisted. And most days I didn’t refuse her. I’d rather have her in my suite than any of the new girls anyway.
After she returned with the lint brush and found me still not reading, she asked, “Do you think I have any cause to worry, Lizzy? Does Royal seem like the wandering type to you?”
I shook my head, a bit exasperated, and said, “For crying out loud, Kelsey. He is so addicted to you. There is no reason you should even think about this!” Sitting forward I looked her square in the eyes. “I believe I know what your problem is.”
Kelsey stood across from me, the lint brush in her hand, all but forgotten. “What is it, Lizzy?”
I shook my head and said, “You were so used to someone who was that way; you expect it from every man. I choose to believe that most men are not cheaters. Besides, Royal is with you nearly every single day. And when he’s not, he’s driving for Emrys. When would he possibly have the time? Seriously, stop dwelling on it. Once Emrys gets the flaming rules changed, Royal will be asking for your hand in marriage...just you watch.”
Her shoulders relaxed a bit. “Really? Do you really think so?” She let out a loud sigh.
“Kelsey, he loves you. It’s so obvious. I’ve known it for ages, before you even knew he existed. And I think he’s had his eye on you for a long time, before I even moved here. It’s one of those things I just know.”
“Sometimes I think Royal is too good to be true, you know?” she said, sitting down and crossing her legs, suddenly
concentrating on brushing the white hair from her sweater. “I’m not used to being happy, and I keep thinking it’s going to change any minute. I often wonder: what if Rohan returns again and claims what is rightfully his? What would I do?” Her brows furrowed as she glanced up studying my face to see if her question bothered me.
“He better not even think about it,” I said, scowling. “He has no rights here, not after what he’s put us through!” I made a gallant effort to sound sure of myself, but deep down inside, fear and dread swelled over me like a crestless wave, and a myriad of dark images flooded my mind.
Would he ever think about coming back for Kelsey? Or is he still after me? Is it still his ultimate goal to be Regent? And if so, will he try to fight with Emrys? Flaming hell!
In reality, he did have rights, at least until Emrys changed that idiotic rule. June couldn’t come fast enough. I was glad that the security measures had increased, but I couldn’t stop wishing someone would just do away with him already. Then we’d never have to think about him - ever again.
Agitated and disquieted, I jumped to my feet and went to the window hoping to calm myself. A coating of snow had fallen earlier in the day painting the grounds pearly white. The trees had a fine powdery look to them like someone had dipped each one in confectioner’s sugar; the sky was empty, a dull ash-gray. Gazing down at my shaking hands, I clasped them together trying to control the tremors. I still couldn’t talk about him without breaking out in a cold sweat. I touched the skin my neck, remembering the choking dog collar he’d used on me, and then I swallowed down the dry lump in my throat.
“I’m sorry, Lizzy. It still bothers you, I can see that.” Kelsey suddenly stood beside me at the window, touching my hand.
“It’s ok. If you need to talk about this, I’ll be fine, really,” I lied. “I’m fine.” I nodded my head, looked her in the eye, and asked, “If he did try to contact you, you’d be sure to tell us though, wouldn’t you?”
I really hoped she’d learned her lesson. The last time she didn’t tell us, and Rohan had tried his best to destroy our lives.
God, I hope she learned her lesson.
If he tried to contact anyone here, it would be Kelsey. He had spent enough time with her to know how vulnerable she was when he was around, although he probably had no idea she was with anyone else - unless of course, word got out of our own society. That was a possibility. I hoped a slim one, but still. My hands wouldn’t stop shaking. Just the thought of him made me queasy. Kelsey handed me my glass of Ambrosia, and I drank it down, holding my breath. Now that I thought about it, I supposed living in my glass jar - with the top screwed on tight, never having a single moment to myself, or feeling like a child that can’t be left alone; maybe it wasn’t so bad after all. The alternative was something I could not even begin to imagine.
Kelsey interrupted my anxious thoughts, and said, “Yes, of course, I would tell you. Or Master Emrys.” Then with a gentle hand, she guided me back to my chair. “Here, keep reading. Maybe you’ll be able to get your mind off this nasty subject. I’ll be quiet, I promise.” She handed me my novel with a sad look in her eyes. “Please forgive me, Lizzy. Read your book now.”
I watched as she scooted back to the couch, finished brushing the hair off her sweater, and then opened her book. Somehow, she made herself relax and didn’t say another word. I sighed, leaned back, opened my book, and tried again. After reading the same paragraph several more times, I realized that not one sentence seemed to be registering. The words blended together in a mass of black on white...nonsense... another language as far as I could tell. I couldn’t stop thinking of all the worst-case scenarios possible. Until that moment, I never knew I was capable of such hatefulness. My contempt for Rohan was fierce and impenetrable.
Still staring at the page in my book, all the letters and dots began to swim in front of me, swirling around like a kaleidoscope, black and white, rivers of sentences, snakes squirming around, little bugs crawling in circles. I blinked as my eyes started to get heavy, and I finally closed them, leaning my head back onto the pillow. I could still see the bugs in my mind. Giant spiders now, creeping creatures of all sizes and shapes; swarming, chasing after me. I tried to flee, but the river of letters and words sucked me down under the blackness. The heaviness held me fast. A quicksand of tiny letters, periods, commas, and semi colons swirled and pulled at me. My chest heaved for air as the thick clotting ink filled my mouth, pooled into my eyes. I opened my eyes one last time before I fell completely under the spell of the word demon and I watched the letters begin to glom together to spell out words. Two words; one meaning. It was the only plan that made any sense. Two simple words - and one simple solution to all of our problems. Bold, dark and thick: KILL HIM
I jerked awake with a start. Kelsey was so engrossed in her book; she didn’t even notice my sudden return to life. Shaking my head and blinking, I wasn’t sure if I had been dreaming, had passed out, or had the weirdest vision of all. Regardless of what it was, I began to understand – this truly was the only answer. Rohan will never quit until he gets his revenge. Emrys will have to kill him, and I had to stop feeling so guilty about wanting it done. I had to quit the constant wavering in my mind – wondering if there could be another way around the decision they had already come to.
Perhaps there was one thing that could help me with the wavering: the words of Sibelle. I imagined that she would be able to tell us what to do, how to do it, and when to do it. Thinking of seeing her soon helped to keep me sane for the next few days. She’d give us some answers. I just knew it. I only hoped I could keep it together between now and then.
It was so much easier when Emrys was with me. I didn’t even think of Rohan when we were together. But being the Regent meant he had responsibilities, meetings, and occasionally had to travel. Like next June. Picturing him leaving rattled my nerves, causing a new hope to creep in. My newest desire was that someone would find Rohan long before June. And kill him.
Surely they must have a search party out looking for him. I’d have to ask Emrys about it. I even planned out how I’d open the conversation. After dinner, when we come back up to our suite, after he has a satisfying, warm glass of Ambrosia, I’ll say - in a sweet voice, of course: “Oh, by the way, honey - I’m not trying to tell you how to do your job, but what’s taking so damn long? Why hasn’t anyone found the rogue and done away with him yet? I know you’re a busy man, but perhaps the next time you have a spare moment, you could take care of this one loose end for me. Please?” In reality, I didn’t need to ask him. Not out loud anyway. All I had to do was think about it.
But, as fate would have it, once Emrys was back in our suite, the thought never crossed my mind again. Not until we were in Scotland.
CHAPTER 5
HAZY SHADE OF WINTER
Opting out of the original idea of taking a winter cruise, and rather than spend so much time driving the long distance, we decided to take a Sleeper train from Euston to Inverness, which turned out to be a surprisingly wonderful and romantic journey. We watched as London disappeared behind us, and the scenery slowly changed from the hustle and bustle of city life to the peacefulness of the beautiful countryside.
Curled up on our berths as the sun began to set, we watched the world zip by while drinking glasses of wine. It was quite relaxing and cozy. It was an eleven-hour trip, and sleeping came quite easy as the constant lull of the train rocked us like babies in a bassinet.
A lovely continental breakfast was served in the morning, and as we sipped our coffee we were able to see that the fields and farmlands of the south had now been replaced with the beautiful awe inspiring mountainous scenery of Scotland.
After arriving at Inverness we had to drive to the top of Scotland to Ullapool, cross the sea by ferry to Stornoway, which is on the Isle of Lewis, and then rent a car for the 40-minute drive to the remote village of Breasclete.
The lodge we’d rented was quite secluded and not easy to find, but turned out to be well worth the sea
rch. It sat on a hillside overlooking a peaceful loch, and while standing outside of the lodge - gazing around, I found it quite strange to see hardly any trees. I now realized why the Hebrides were known for their fantastic sunrises and sunsets: with very little to block the views, there was so much sky everywhere you looked!
I took in a deep breath and just listened to the quiet. The serenity was striking, and I sighed, letting the peace engulf me. Especially after spending the night in the rumbling train and then driving in the loud rental car, the sound of silence - no cars, no engines, and no hustle and bustle – was quite a welcomed relief. But while taking in the perceived silence, I soon realized that the air was actually alive with sounds: grazing sheep and lambs in the distance, the subdued noises of birds and wildlife, and the soft whisper of the wind through the hills.
Emrys paused, arms loaded with our bags, and stood beside me, not saying a word. Apparently he’d realized how much I was enjoying the peace and quiet, and after a few moments of gazing into the vast distance with me, he carried the luggage through the doorway.
Eventually I followed him inside, and found that the interior of the place was nearly as impressive as the scenery outside. The floor to ceiling windows let in an enormous amount of light and afforded us a view of the beautiful Breasclete village. In the other direction, another vista stretched out far and wide, and in the distance, impressive hills and moors marched away to infinity.
As I stood there in awe, Emrys mentioned, in passing, that we were about a mile from some ancient standing stones and that it would be only a short drive to the coast in any direction. I nodded, barely listening, still enraptured, and staring out of the huge window.
Exploring the lodge, I discovered there was a small kitchen and found that the fridge was stocked with a basket of strawberries, Hebridean handmade chocolates and a bottle of fine Italian wine.
The dining room opened out onto a spacious living area with two comfortable honey-colored leather couches that were arranged around an enormous television and fireplace. The rooms were decorated with elegant artistic touches - a glass sculpture here, a beautiful vase of fresh flowers there, scenic pictures on the walls, soft lighting, and warm colors. It had quite a homey feeling, yet was very stylish and modern, not at all like the plain, barren lodge I imagined we’d end up in. It was perfect.
The Ravenswynd Series - Boxed Set Page 55