by Ally Derby
Before lunch, she finds me right as I am about to make my escape toward the bathroom.
“Come on, Hadley. You’ll sit with us from now on.”
I feel good about this. She seems completely genuine, and I am nervously excited about the idea of having such fast friends here.
We sit with her friends, Bee and Skylar.
“Wait, before you sit, tell me, are you Everlark or Everthorne?” The girl who has dark hair and eyes—I think she is Latina—and is short and stocky … Bee. Her name is Bee.
“You better give the correct answer, or Bee here will flip,” Skylar, the tall, mixed race, very thin and gorgeous girl says.
“If I have to sit on the floor and eat, it’ll be okay. It is and always will be Everlark,” I answer.
To our benefit, we all say we are team Everlark and that Gale and Katniss don’t even make sense together. Beatrice even has an interesting theory on the fictional character-napping of our beloved Peeta. This is the way the conversation continues to go the entire time. It’s all about The Hunger Games. I am more at ease now than ever.
I think I’m going to like it here.
I find out Bee and Skylar have gone to Blue Valley together since kindergarten, while Lana moved here only a couple years ago.
After school, they convince me to go with them to winter intramurals. Apparently, the PE teacher is a field hockey enthusiast and wants to have the best team in Central New York this coming fall. A couple other schools in the area are doing the same thing, so we will have actual games. This makes me happy. Now add to it that my new, very fast friends want to play, as well, and okay, I know I’m gonna like it here.
When I send a text to my mother and tell her I’m staying after, she replies with way too many colons and capital Ds, which makes me laugh to myself.
“Nerd girl alert,” I hear a tall, very long-legged, very pretty blonde laugh to her group of friends as we walk into the locker room to change.
I immediately think of Glimmer and how her outward beauty only masks her inward ugly.
“Kiss it, Claire,” Lana says, giving her three fingers.
I look at her like she’s crazy.
“Hunger Games,” Bee explains. “Lana uses it to flip people off without getting in trouble.”
“Nice.” I laugh.
“Right? Then the parental units don’t catch on,” Lana explains further.
“Gotcha,” I say as I watch the girl Claire whispering to her friends.
“P.I.R.,” Skylar says.
“What?” I ask.
“Parents in room,” Bee chimes in. “Text terms. How do you not know that one? You have an iPhone.”
“I just got it yesterday for my birthday.”
“Birthday? No way! How did we miss that?” Skylar asks.
Wow, just wow, I think to myself.
“Um, hello, Sky, she just moved here.” Lana laughs.
“Duh, of course.” Skylar laughs it off.
“What’s her problem?” I nod to the group of girls.
“Oh, her? Pax broke up with her last year. She is one nasty, little thing. She hates me and tried starting a rumor that I had a crush on him. Can you imagine?” Lana laughs as she ties her cleats.
“Your brother?” I gape.
“Stepbrother,” Bee corrects.
“Same difference. God, can you imagine crushing on a boy you’ve been raised with? Gross!” Lana gives a disgusted look.
“No way in heck,” I agree, as I pull my warm up pants on.
“Do you have I-G?” Bee asks, playing with my phone. “Guess not yet.”
“Are you into role-playing?” Bee asks, downloading the app.
“No, why?”
“You’re about to enter into the coolest game in the world. It’s fierce.” She looks up, then talks me through the set up before handing me my phone. “Easy-peasy, lemon-squeezy.”
“I’m not into games.”
“Okay, let me explain. Role-play, or RP as, like, everyone on the face of the fandom world calls it, is like writing a story with your friends. I’ve met a lot of cool people there. There are academies, schools, camps, arenas, districts, factions—practically every fandom has an RP. It’s pretty cool,” Bee explains.
“You’re into books, though, right?” Lana asks.
“Of course.”
“You’ll love it. Trust us,” Bee smiles at me.
“Enter your username, but choose wisely.”
“What are yours?” I ask.
“Mine is beesbookbuzz.” Bee smiles.
“I’m sky-dot-da-dot-limitless.” Sky smirks.
“I’m fanchicks123,” Lana says.
“Okay how about thefiercefangirl? Or is that really lame?”
“Perfect.” Bee nods. “Love it.”
~*~
Apparently, I am pretty good at field hockey because, even though I’m only a sophomore, I am placed as a starting forward, opposite Claire. I don’t like that I am not playing on the same team as my friends, but we travel and practice together, so I see them just as much. Evidently, field hockey is a dying sport around here because every other indoor team is over an hour away.
Claire and I may not talk, like ever, but by the end of the short eight week season, which I only play four weeks of, we have found a groove. Coach Douglas likes the way we work together and mentions that we could be state champions in the fall if we work a little harder together. He wants us to become friends.
“Fat chance,” she mumbles under her breath as she brushes past me, walking out of his office.
Peace, sister, I think to myself as I walk out behind her.
I am thankful that I only have the end of the season party that I will have to see her again at. Then, I will be able to hang out more with Lana, Bee, and Skylar, and I will have a chance to read again.
Thank God!
~*~
Within a week, I am borderline obsessed with fan fiction and role-playing, thanks to my friends. Now it’s a month later, and Lana, Bee, and I easily spend an hour, maybe more, invested in this crazy, new world every day. Sky is a little less obsessed, but she plays along for the same reason I spend some Saturday mornings at the park with a sketch pad in one hand and a piece of chalk in the other. They love to sketch in the park and have asked me to go, and that’s what friends do.
Through DM, or direct messages, each person creates a character. Then, message after message, a story unfolds.
thefiercefangirl: Okay guys, The Hunger Games Role play, or THG RP. My character is Quinn Greenwood. You know, my usual.
Beesbookbuz:- Mine is Willow Oak, my usual. You know, the blondie.
fanchicks123: Mine’s Kaden Red. The one with the black hair.
sky.da.limitless: Obviously, Becca. You guys ready?
sky.da.limitless: Becca walks around, searching for food and water, on guard, making sure no one is following her.
Thefiercefangirl: Quinn quietly walks around, looking for the girl she decided to become allies with during training. Knowing the other girl was District Two, she tried her hardest not to get caught.
fanchicks123: Kaden leaves her camp with her allies as soon as she wakes up, knowing if they caught her, she would be killed.
Beesbookbuzz: Willow jumps from the tree she’s been sleeping in at the sound of rushing water. A flash flood strikes the arena. The water starts coming from the ground and the top of the ‘roof’ of the arena.
sky.da.limitless: Becca jolts as her shoes start to fill with the water.
Thefiercefangirl: Sorry, guys, GTG. I’m tired.
I smile as I sign out.
“Whatcha doing, sweetheart?” my mom asks from the doorway.
“Role-playing on IG,” I answer. When she doesn’t reply, I look toward my door. “Book stuff, Mom. It’s all good.”
“You sure?”
“Yes, Mom, I am.”
“All up and up, right? Remember, everything you post stays up there in that cloud forever. No taking it back. No—”
/>
“I know. I saw JJ’s big reveal on your Facebook from his first drunken college party, remember?” My half-brother’s an idiot, I think to myself.
“A decision he has to live with for the rest of his life,” she says like she feels bad about my Dad’s first child’s choice to get drunk and bare it all.
Gross. That is just something you can never un-see.
~*~
I don’t understand why Lana is hiding her role-playing from her parents, so I ask her on our way to school.
“They are completely over-protective,” she explains.
“Oh.”
“Your parents seem cool with everything,” she turns the topic on me.
“Yeah. Cool.”
“So your mom reads palms? Is that, like, her job?”
Ever since field hockey, Lana has been a little less chipper and a lot more in my face. I don’t understand. If she decided she doesn’t like me, she should just stop hanging out with me, right? God, this is so confusing. She knows so much about me now, all my embarrassing, closeted things, like the fact that my mom reads palms for extra money.
I asked her not to say anything, and she promised she wouldn’t. I cannot believe she is starting that crap up again. She promised.
“She is a hairstylist. She rents a booth downtown. That’s her real job.”
“She offered to read my mom’s palm,” she says.
“Great. I bet she was impressed.”
“She laughed, actually. No big deal.”
It is a big deal. My family embarrasses the hell out of me.
Say what you will about Mother Nature, but today, she is on my side. It down pours just as I am reaching an even higher level of uncomfortable in front of my new friend, so we start laughing and cover our heads with our bags.
“Should we run for it?” I ask.
“Yes!”
A horn blows from behind us, and I look over.
“Come on, Lana, you and new girl get in.” It is Pax, Lana’s popular and very handsome stepbrother. He is more beautiful than I could even put into words, and he seems like a very nice guy, too. He always smiles and either waves or says hi to me in the hallways at school.
“Thanks, Pax,” Lana says as she slides in the front seat.
“Lana, are you gonna let her in?” He laughs, as I squeeze in behind her to get in the back.
“I got it.” I laugh. “See? All set.”
As I look up, his blue eyes are smiling in the rearview mirror. Feeling my face heat, I turn away before he is aware. Dear God, now is not the time to develop your first crush, I tell myself.
“You like it here, new girl?”
“All except the torrential downpours when there is snow on the ground,” I answer as I look out the window, avoiding the chance that I may make a fool of myself and get lost in the rearview mirror again.
~*~
I am washing my hands in the school bathroom when Claire walks in.
She nods. “Hey.”
“Hey.” I nod back.
“Busy this weekend?”
I look around to see if I may have been mistaken, and maybe she really isn’t talking to me. She never talks to me, which is perfectly fine with me.
She laughs. “We’re the only ones in here, Had.”
“I suppose so.” I return the laugh.
“A few of the players and I are joining an indoor spring league. Coach says we need to play more. I, for one, would love a shot at state this fall. Hell, nationals would be cool. You wanna join? You can ride with us.”
“I’ll ask my mom.”
“Cool, message me?”
“O … kay?”
“You have Instagram?” she asks.
“Yeah.”
“Name?”
“thefiercefangirl.”
“Oh God, you are in deep with the nerd herd.” She laughs.
“My friends and I read. Why does that make us nerds?” I question her.
“Oh, I just bust on Lana, all in fun.” Yeah right, I think. “I’ll be nice. The past is the past, right?”
“Yep, so they say,” I answer.
“Cool, chat later?”
“Sure.”
~*~
“She said it was all in good fun?” Lana huffs as we walk home from school. “Crazy ass.”
“She said she just busts on you.”
“You aren’t gonna seriously go with them?” Lana asks, as if she already knows I won’t.
I shrug and she laughs, letting me know she thinks I’m joking. I don’t want to upset her, because she’s a good friend—my best friend—but I am really good at something for the very first time in my life. Not only am I good at it, but I love the game. I know I want to join them. On the field, it’s me, my teammates, the ball, and the goal. Nothing else. No one is better than anyone, and we all work together. I love it.
I also know Bee and Skylar won’t be upset about it. Lana, on the other hand, is making this about her and Claire.
When I walk in my house, I tell Mom about the indoor league and ask what she thinks. Of course she asks how much it’s going to cost. I hate money. Hate it.
“Not sure,” I say as I grab an orange out of the fridge, “I’ll find out.”
“We will make it work, I promise.” She smiles at me, but I see worry.
“If not, Mom, it’s seriously no big deal.”
Maybe it’s just not meant to be. I know we don’t have any extra money, and I don’t want her to stress out. Lana will be happier, too. Whatever happens, I know it will be fine. It always is.
chapter two
Airplane Mode…
It is the last day of spring break, and my half-brother JJ has just gone back to college after a very short visit, which I was grateful for because all three of my friends went away on some sort of spring break trip. Bee and Sky have sent texts and continued the role-playing online, but Lana hasn’t. She hasn’t even replied to mine.
Things have been a little stressed between us since I started playing on the indoor league with Claire. I still don’t understand why she would be upset with me about that.
I am bored out of my mind and just about to flip through the channels again when I hear a knock on the door.
“Hey, do you want to go bike riding?” Lana asks, when I open the front door.
Less than six weeks ago, I moved to Blue Valley from Franklin Street in downtown Buffalo. Looking online, this place was beautiful and peaceful. There was no crime or gunshots to be heard, no gang violence or bars on the windows, so how is it that I feel more uneasy here than I did back there?
“Yeah, that sounds fun,” I say, trying to mask my hesitation. “Lemme go grab mine and I’ll be right back.”
I follow her out the door and to our garage to grab my bike. It is a navy blue and white Schwinn. When I first got it, I could barely get on it without a stool. My parents said I would “grow into it,” and I have … after two years.
I hop on and coast to Lana’s house, where she’s standing on the sidewalk with her bike.
“Here’s your helmet,” she says, handing it to me. It has the same color scheme as my bike. I must have left it at her house because I mostly ride with her, anyway.
She starts to pedal and gestures for me to follow.
“Where’s Pax?” I ask casually. I don’t want her to think I like him, but he and I have gotten to know each other better after we started riding with him to school nearly every day since it has been raining or drizzling every day. Like I said before, Mother Nature isn’t so bad.
“Hanging out with Claire and her friends again, just like he has ever since you guys started being friends,” she says with disgust. “Why?”
I shrug as she looks back over her shoulder at me. There is no reason for that news to make me upset; a friend is a friend, after all. However, the idea of him hanging out with her is a little bothersome. Obviously, it’s annoying to Lana as well.
Feeling kind of bad, I quickly change the subject as we ride down
the streets of our town. Lana and I talk about senseless things, like our English class and art, which is one of our favorite classes.
“What do you think our next art project will be?” Lana asks.
“Honestly, I don’t know, but I know it will be cool.”
Mrs. Liam—our art liaison, as she calls herself—is one of our favorite teachers. She loves to give us assignments that she likes to do, as well. Before break, we made pottery vases, and I loved it.
“So … umm … What do you think—” I cut myself off as I see Claire and Pax walking down the street together.
“Looky here. Hmm … shall we?” Lana asks.
I shrug, knowing exactly what she has planned. She is going to be confrontational.
“Why not forgive and forget, Lana? She and Pax seem to be getting close again, and honestly, she has never said one word about you—”
“She dragged my name through the mud, said I was crushing on my freaking stepbrother, Hadley.”
“I know, but—”
“And now she’s got my best friend brainwashed.”
“Not brainwashed,” I say, trying to stick up for myself.
“Close to it. She’s using you. She’s trying to get something out of you. Look,” she says, getting off her bike, “she’s got Pax’s attention now because of you.”
“That’s really not fair.” I get off my own bike and try to catch up with her at the same time I am trying to get my helmet off. “Pax seems like a smart guy, so I’m sure, if she is not kind to you, he’ll stick up for you. And Claire and I are teammates. If she is using me in that capacity, then I am using her, too. And Pax’s friendship with her has nothing to do with me.”
“Oh, yes, it does and—”
“If you think she’s using me, and it upsets you, switch it up, Lana. I’m doing the same thing. I know she and I can help each other.”
“Do you plan on playing that game forever? I mean”—she throws her hand in the air and laughs—“are you going to go pro?”
That stings.
“I don’t have rich parents, Lana, and if I can get a scholarship for something like field hockey, I could go to college someday. A good college, not a community—”