I knew all three of our ceremonial knives were in the car so I didn’t have to worry about those. As soon as I was ready I took off, leaving earlier than I normally would have if I were going to school. Luckily my mom didn’t notice. The drive into Ojai wasn’t as smooth as I would’ve liked thanks to morning rush hour traffic. It took a lot of self-control to hold onto the steering wheel without gripping it to the point of bursting blood vessels in my knuckles or screaming at the windshield for people to get the hell out of my way. The morning banter on the radio was almost more than I could take, but I didn’t think to turn on a CD for some reason. All of my attention had zeroed in on the task that was in front of me and every extra second it took to get there felt like a failure. Eventually, I pulled into the parking lot of the park I was looking for.
Although it was still bitterly cold outside it hadn’t rained again, giving the earth a break from the water and letting the soil settle back down. I had dressed in layers, but was sure to pull on hiking boots this time rather than the slick soled tennis shoes I had worn last time. I put both Jodi and Steven’s knives in my backpack, but I tucked mine into the sleeve of my left arm. The hilt pressed against my palm felt like a splint for a broken wrist, but I would be able to draw it out of its sheath with my right hand if I needed to and it gave me a vague sense of security.
Because of the weather and the fact that it was Wednesday at eight o’clock in the morning, the park was blessedly deserted. I had a small sense of dread at the thought that, should anything happen to me, no one would know to look for me, but there was no other way for me to get this done if people knew where I was going or planning to do. Jodi and Steven would have insisted that they come along, but I wasn’t sure the spell would work correctly if there were three points of interest working rather than just me alone. Tracy’s life was at stake and now mine probably was too. The risks were too great. At least, that’s what I was telling myself.
I was amazed at how long it had taken me to get to the clearing the second time. The darkness must have played tricks with my sense of distance when I had come with Steven and Jodi. I slid on loose mud more than once without a tree or branch to catch myself on. The knees and seat of my pants were slick with mud that sent a whole new chill through my body. I pressed on and the trees began to grow in size until they were so big around I couldn’t wrap my arms around them.
Finally in the distance, I saw the true thinning of the trees that lead to the clearing. I stopped just feet from the edge of the clearing and knelt in the fallen leaves and pulled my backpack around in front of me, opening it and fishing out the dried sage bundles. I already had matches in the front pouch of the bag. I pulled one out and struck it on the box igniting the tiny flame and set it against the bundle. I had the sage smoldering quickly after waving it around, encouraging the smoke to grow stronger until the fragrance filled my sinuses, bringing tears to my eyes.
I sniffed against the smoke, blinking back the tears, and stood, carefully slinging the bag back over my shoulders, settling it in place. I walked forward until my toes were just at the edge of the circle. I pulled my knife free of its sheath and gripped it tightly in my freehand, taking comfort in the weight of the hilt in my palm. One deep, steadying breath and I slashed forward, cutting through the magical shield held in place by the invisible circle of power, and stepped into the clearing.
I felt the edges of the cut I had made slide over my head and shoulders and fall away behind me like a heavy plastic curtain. The clearing looked the same as it had all those days ago. A shiver ran down my back and goose bumps raised on my arms. The power in the circle was trying to reach me, but I was under it and it couldn’t touch me now. If I had taken the time to think about what I was doing when I had brought Steven and Jodi here the first time, I would have thought better about just breaking into this circle. But then I had thought we were just dealing with a group of rebellious teenagers and not someone or something practiced in the dark arts.
I turned to look back at the trees I had just stepped through and found the first tree that I had marked in my book with a rune carving. I was facing the bottom most point of the star that created the inverted pentagram in the clearing. I walked right up to the tree and took a moment to re-sheath my knife and then placed my empty hand on the tree trunk. The bark was cool and rough to the touch. I pushed past that first layer and reached into the heart of the tree and felt the burning sensation of pain and anger sear my hand. I said a quiet prayer and waved the smoldering bundle of sage in front of the tree and felt the heat receding, fading out of my hand. It was still there, but not as strong. It was working. I moved on to the next tree and repeated the breaking spell and continued on until I had done all five trees.
I moved on to erasing the first layer of power in the earth that had been laid when the circle was drawn and then started all over again with the first tree. It took hours of repetition and three ruined bundles of sage later before I could finally lay my hands on that last tree and feel nothing but the rushing life force as it drew water and energy back up into itself from the ground beneath. I gave myself a second to revel in my small success, sinking down between the roots of the tree and resting against the trunk, listening to the life teaming inside. I rummaged in my bag until I found the velvet pouch that held my runes and spilled them out into my hand. I selected five different stones, each with a symbol representing different things like love, faith, and protection.
I crawled out of the shelter of the tree and walked over to a thick tree next to the first tree I had started the breaking spell on. I would create my own pentagram in complete contrast to the one I had just destroyed. It would be a pentagram of protection, like taking a ruined inverted cross and cleansing it in holy water and hanging it upright again. I picked out the first of my runes, choosing the one for protection against enemies to set the protection spells into motion, and laid it inside the hallow of the tree. I chose trees that already lent themselves to my purpose rather than carving into their bark and causing pain and scars like what had been done to the five trees I had just healed. I turned and faced out into the clearing and began pacing towards a tree across the way and just off to the right.
As I walked, I envisioned a line of power cutting through the fallen leaves and grass trailing behind me. I felt the energy pulsating just at the small of my back as I walked; it was warm against the frigid air. When I reached the first tree again, closing the final point of my star, a warm gust of air swirled through the clearing suddenly, tendrils of energy reached out to me like curious, searching fingers. It swirled around me in a vortex, lifting me off the ground and surrounding my whole body in a cocoon and turning faster and faster until every inch of me was covered in the swirling magical air. My body ached to pull away from itself joint by joint against the power that was consuming me.
Instinctively I struggled against it, willing it to set me back on the ground and release me, but with every second I struggled it only gripped me tighter. My lungs contracted as if trying to breathe through a fire, but there wasn’t enough oxygen left in the air to get one good breath. I realized I was becoming lightheaded and dizzy even though the swirling energy had only lifted me straight up and held me steady. I could feel the corners of my mind growing dark as the thought of passing out edged closer and closer.
I closed my eyes against the vortex and sighed out the breath I was holding, relaxing into the energy and succumbing to its power, its will. Almost instantly, my mind cleared and the sweetest, freshest air filled my lungs. My body stopped trying to tear itself apart and eased into the cocoon of power. It was dreamlike floating there in the center of my pentagram of protection, wrapped in the warm embracing power of my elements against the cold destroying power of the demon. I felt my aura pulsate. As the vortex calmed and I inched closer to the ground, my aura grew in strength and light. I was absorbing the power into my shields, into me.
I opened my eyes and found myself lying in the center of my pentagram on the forest floor wher
e the secret element of spirit hid, protected by the other elements of power. My skin was tingling with the power I had just taken into myself and in my peripheral vision I could see the glow of my aura as if it were a tangible thing.
I propped myself up on my elbows and looked around. It was the same clearing, but I realized the sun was much farther to the west than it should have been from when I was caught up in the vortex of power until now. It made me a little nervous about how much time must have passed. Magic worked that way. You think things are taking hours to accomplish and really you’ve only been working for twenty minutes, but now ten minutes must have gone by in a couple of hours. Great. I did not want to be stuck trying to find my way back to the trail in failing light. I got to my feet and hurried over to my bag and gathered my things. I took a few moments to say one final prayer and seal the circle I had drawn and thanked all of the trees that we would be using.
I wasn’t sure if it was my imagination or not, but another warm breeze glided through the clearing, rustling the branches and leaves before it caressed my face. It was a pretty nice gesture and a boost to my confidence. I turned and started to make my way through the forest back to the trail before I lost all daylight.
Chapter 17
The sun was slowly disappearing behind the ridge of mountains when I finally came out of the forest. The air was colder now and the thick hooded sweatshirt I was wearing was nowhere near enough to keep me from shivering violently. My breath came out in white puffy clouds and the sweat that had broke out on my forehead burned with cold. I unlocked the trunk of my car and tried to hurl my backpack in, but my arms were weak and I only managed to drop it inside. I pulled the trunk lid closed and had to try twice before I got the latch to catch. I was nothing but spindled nerves and trembling limbs. I had forgotten the fact that I would need to eat at some point in my haste to get out of my house and all the energy it took me to hike in and out of the forest was enough to make me hungry, but with the added cost of the magic I had summoned and worked through, I was ravenous and running on fumes.
I was almost afraid to drive myself out of the park and onto the freeway, taking a few moments to decide whether or not to call Steven and Jodi to come get me. I was holding my cell phone in my hand, turning it over and over with my fingers while I debated with myself. I finally just steeled myself, tossed the cell phone into the passenger’s seat, and turned the key in the ignition. The inside of the car was just as cold as the outside so I sat, my hands tucked under my arms and my right foot pumping the gas pedal until the engine warmed up and the first few wisps of warmer air started to come out of the vents. Just before I backed out of my parking space, I picked up my phone and sent text messages to both Steven and Jodi to meet me at the diner for dinner.
Traffic on the way back home was just as bad as it had been on the way up. I had lost track of time so much so that it was evening and people were trying to rush home, locking up the freeways to a depressing crawl. We were moving so sluggishly I was able to check the response messages Steven and Jodi sent, agreeing to meet me and was able to send back messages telling them about the traffic. What should have been a thirty-minute drive was closer to an hour, but I had so little energy left in me that I couldn’t even get annoyed about it. My upper arms tingled in a way that I had never felt before. I turned into the parking lot of the restaurant and my vision was just a little fuzzy. I needed to eat.
Steven waved to me from the far corner of the diner; he and Jodi already had drinks in front of them and weren’t bothering with the menus. I slid into the empty side of the booth, pushing the cup of coffee they had ordered for me away. I waved the waitress over and ordered a large three-egg breakfast with potatoes, bacon, and biscuits and gravy with a large glass of milk. Steven, Jodi, and the waitress stared at me wide-eyed. It was more food than I normally ordered, but I flashed my most polite smile that I could muster at the waitress and waited for Steven and Jodi to order. The waitress walked away after the other two had placed their orders and I sighed into the booth.
“Dude, what is up with you?” Steven asked, leaning over the table so he could whisper to me.
“Sorry, I’m… really… drained,” I said carefully, realizing I was losing more and more energy and was even having a hard time talking. I looked up and caught our waitress’ eye and waved her back over to me.
“Something else?” She asked.
“Yeah, can I go ahead and get that milk before the meal and an order of white toast as quickly as possible?” I had lost my breath in the long sentence, openly panting trying to catch it again.
“Um… sure. Are you ok?” the waitress asked.
“Fine, just tired.”
“Ok, anything for you two?” I tried to keep the impatience out of my face as she stalled, but I reminded myself she was only doing her job. Steven and Jodi shook their heads at her to send her off.
“Shay, what –” Jodi started to ask me what was wrong, but I held up a weak hand to stop her, not wanting to be forced to explain before I had some food in me. Although it was probably only a few minutes, it felt like hours before the waitress came back with my toast and milk. I dove on them like a starving person, devouring my toast in as few large bites as possible, only slowing to drink my milk at a normal pace so I wouldn’t throw it back up.
I sat back, letting my body have a few minutes to digest the bread and butter, feeling my stomach settle slowly and my fingers stop trembling. Carbohydrates are a wonderful thing. I opened my eyes just enough to see Jodi and Steven staring at me intensely, which surprised me; I expected them to have their heads together and be whispering about me. I cleared my throat and pushed myself up with my shoulders against the back of the booth seat. They both waited patiently, but I could feel their tension and building impatience like ragged claws tearing at the skin on my forearms. I took a deeper breath and pushed them away by reinforcing my shields. They both made faces.
“Sorry, but you guys are hurting me, I need some breathing room,” I tried to explain. “I’m going to tell you everything ok, just try to calm down.”
“So you have been doing something without us?” Jodi asked, a little more than angry. I sighed, knowing that they were going to be as stubborn as they wanted to be and weren’t going to wait to hear me out before they let their tempers run amok.
“Yes, but only because I had to, ok?” I rushed through the sentence before they could interrupt me. I explained the spell I had written, supposedly in my sleep, and explained where I had been all day and what I had been doing. Through the entire explanation both of their expressions changed to pure and simple anger. “Look, the spell called for one point of focus in order to break his hold on the sacrifice. If you two had been there casting the circle with me, then the power would have been divided and we wouldn’t be strong enough to take him.”
“So you’re saying that you didn’t find this spell in any book and it didn’t come to you while your were conscious?” Steven asked in a strangely calm voice.
“That’s right…” I said carefully.
“And it never occurred to you that maybe, just maybe, Jensen or Ian were manipulating you while you were asleep and you’ve just casted an untested spell?” Steven looked and sounded years older and wiser than he normally displayed. I was saved a little embarrassment when the waitress arrived just then with our orders. We politely waved her off saying we didn’t need anything else. “Well?” Steven asked a little more impatiently this time.
“No, I didn’t consider it,” I said in a resigned voice. “I looked at it and it looked like the kind of spell I would have written if I had known exactly what I was dealing with.” I shrugged and stabbed moodily at my biscuits and gravy, taking a larger than ladylike bite. “If I had gotten to the clearing and the trees hadn’t lined up with what I had drawn or the carvings of the runes weren’t there, I wouldn’t have proceeded, ok?” I said defensively around a large mouthful.
“You know, if either one of us,” Jodi said, motioning between her
and Steven, “had done what you just did without the other two, you would have our asses in a sling.”
I took a few more bites of food to buy myself a little time. The fact was, she was right; I would never let either of them do what I had just done alone.
“You’re right,” I said finally.
“That’s it? ‘You’re right.’ That’s all you have to say?” Steven asked, his voice rising angrily.
“What do you want me to say, Steven?” I asked, my own anger rising to meet his. “I’m sorry? I’m not. Look it had to be done. If we had gone in there without any preparations and all that magic just waiting for him to empower him, we’d die right along with the sacrifice and I had a way to stop that, so I did it, ok?”
“No, it’s not ok! What if it had been a trap?” Jodi interjected. I had nothing to say to that so I just finished my eggs.
“You could have brought us with you,” Steven said, lowering his voice finally.
“I already told you, the spell wouldn’t have worked with three points of interest.” I had to use a lot of self-control not to slam my fist on the table when I spoke and hold in my anger and not let it wash all over them in a searing bath.
“But we could’ve been there, damnit!” Steven’s face was growing more and more red while Jodi’s was becoming paler. Shimmering waves of heat singed the peach fuzz on my face. “We could’ve just been there in case it was a trap or if you’d’ve gotten hurt. It was stupid and prideful for you to go out there alone, Terra!” Steven finished in an angry whisper, leaning towards me over his side of the table. The sweet smell of burning wood battled with the salty scent of bacon.
I didn’t meet his eyes. He’d used my elemental name and it had sounded like a curse when he’d said it. I stared at my fork, twirling it between my fingers. He was right. I didn’t want them to divide the power of the spell, but it was just stupid for me to have gone out on my own.
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