"And so, my lady, I shall not allow you to speak of yourself as 'a fly caught in the middle of a web,' " he went on, and I looked at him again to see the ridiculously stern expression he was now bending on me. "You are the woman who has been pledged to me in marriage, and I mean to dedicate myself to your happiness."
"Do you really," I said, suddenly annoyed that a Flower would even consider "not allowing" a Blade to do something. "I feel a great admiration for those who are dedicated, and I'm wondering how you intend proceeding with your intentions. What if I don't want to be happy?"
"Then I shall certainly take great delight in making you unhappy," he said soberly, then raised a hand to titter behind it. "Meaning, of course, that if being unhappy will make you happy, then I shall see to the matter that way. As I told you, I am completely dedicated."
"Completely dedicated," I echoed in a mutter, staring balefully at his scatterbrained amusement. "There was a free-worker in a night house I used to frequent who told me that once, but it turned out he was misphrasing. What he should have said was that he was completely inadequate to the task at hand."
I expected the Flower to continue assuring me how capable
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he was, but instead his smile went vacant even as his expression brightened, and suddenly he found a renewed appetite for what was on the platter in front of him. At first I couldn't understand so odd a reaction, and then I remembered it wasn't the first time he'd reacted that way. 1 was desperate enough to try anything to discourage him, and that sort of anything wasn't difficult at all.
"Yes, I've found there are both benefits and drawbacks for women who use night houses," I commented, as though unaware of his new preoccupation with food. "One of the benefits, of course, is the constant variety, but strangely enough that's also one of the drawbacks. You look for the workers who really have learned to do it right, but in order to find them you have to go through a large number of gropers. Then, after you've jnade the effort and have learned who your favorites are, the word somehow gets around to the other female Blades and you walk in to find all your favorites already claimed for the night. Sometimes it's downright discouraging."
"You must have had quite a lot of adventures as a Blade," he responded, still paying an inordinate amount of attention to eating. "Fighting in battle is quite horrendous, I'm sure, and I can't imagine how you keep from being frightened. If it were I, I would be quite beside myself."
"Anyone who isn't frightened in battle isn't safe to fight beside," ! said, silently congratulating him for managing to get three "quites" into his little speech. It was one more than the messenger who had led me into the trap had gotten, but it still wasn't enough to distract me from my original topic—as he seemed to have been trying to do.
"The fool who isn't afraid has no real interest in staying alive," I said after pausing to swallow at my brew. "Fighters with sense let their fears protect them, but once the battle is over you have to cope with relief reactions. Sometimes that means nothing more than uncontrollable shaking, but once you've been a Blade for a while it most often comes out as outrageous silliness. I remember one time when battle's end left my Fist not far from a stream, and even though it had already begun turning really cold, four of us stripped and jumped into the water. We might have been laughing on our way in, but once we hit the icy-coldness there wasn't any-
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thing to be heard but howls. Then Foist blundered into me, and immediately decided he knew how to warm up even in that liquid ice. He pulled me close and began running his hands over me, trying to make it possible, you see, but he was so cold that even touching me didn't—"
I broke off my story and just sal there with brows raised high, pretending to be surprised when Lord Flower hastily excused himself, surged to his feet, then hurried away from the board. Once he was gone I sat back in my chair with a satisfied inner smile, wondering just how far I'd be able to take that tactic. I didn't know if it would be enough to send him running even from a ceremony he was "eagerly looking forward to," but a little more experimentation ought to give me the answer.
"Sofaltis, what have you done?" my father asked suddenly, just as though he didn't approve. Traixe had left his place to hurry after our guest in distress, which meant I'd have to question him later. Whatever he found out was bound to be a help for our side.
"I'm terribly sorry. Father," I answered, looking at him with sorrowful sincerity. "I seem to have distressed Lord Kylin with something I said. Wouldn't it be awful if he decided he didn't want to marry me after all?"
My father's expression went through rapid change as I drained my cup of the brew it held, but he had it under control again as I got to my feet and bowed my request to be excused. He had seemed to be anxious to question me, but knew as well as I that that wasn't the place for it. In a way I was glad not to need to stay through an explanation; the hall had grown very close despite the opening of the window-doors leading to the battlements, and I needed a short stroll in the cool night air I could see beyond the lamplight. By the time I got back Lord Flower might be ready for another treatment, which meant I was actually looking forward to seeing him again. I nodded pleasantly to the circulating guests, and just kept going until 1 was through the doors.
Traixe hurried out after the young man who had left the hall right before him, but he didn't manage to catch up until
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they had put two long corridors between themselves and the feasters. When Lord Kylin opened his mouth to speak Traixe quickly gestured him to silence, then led the way to a door not far from where they'd been. Inside was the small chamber Traixe used when he needed to speak to one of his fighters in his capacity as a priest of Evon, and once a lamp was lit and the door closed behind him, the older Fighter turned to the younger.
"All right, now we can speak as we please," he said to Lord Kylin, studying the younger man's agitation. "I hope you're not going to tell me she's actually managed to find something to make you change your mind."
"That sounded like a really excellent plan to keep her occupied when we decided on it," Kylin answered, running a big hand through his streaky blond-brown hair. "1 particularly liked it because it meant I would have the chance to get to know her, but I'm afraid she's picked up on something that's going to give me trouble."
Kylin's expression of discomforted near-embarrassment was familiar enough to Traixe to keep him silent but encouraging while he gestured to one of the comfortable chairs the chamber held. Kylin barely hesitated before going over to drop into it, then waited for Traixe to do the same before gesturing vaguely.
"You have to stop to remember how many weeks I've been practicing and living this part," the younger man said in an effort to explain what was bothering him. "If I'd taken time out for relief on the way and someone found out about it, it could have ruined everything, so I didn't. I haven't often gone that long without a woman before, but there were other things to distract me and I knew it wouldn't be forever. Then I got here and met Sofaltis instead of the pale, frightened little thing I'd been expecting, and suddenly everything changed. For an entire hour before the Feasting, my mind refused to think about anything but what our wedding night would be like."
Traixe nodded sympathetically, understanding what the other man meant. The girl wasn't an eye-stopping beauty, but when she walked into a room she tended to draw attention. To keep from thinking about bedding her would be difficult for any normal man; for the man who had come to take her to wife, it would have to be three times worse.
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"When she first came up to me in the feasting hall, I was delighted to see her again," Kylin went on, now looking down at his knees. "I expected to have a very pleasant time talking to her and getting to know her, but I made the mistake of giving her a chance to pass a suggestive comment. It was nothing, really, no more than a remark about her bein
g a stimulating partner, but suddenly 1 was on fire! For an instant I was terrified that she'd touch me; if she had, I probably would have had her then and there! It took me a broiling long time to get enough control back to talk to her again, but I was sure I'd kept everyone from noticing the struggle. Well, no one did notice—except for her.''
"Are you sure?" Traixe asked, faintly worried now. "We can all insist we don't know why you're interested in her and that will keep her from having anything to get suspicious over, but that's not the same as being hot for her. Most Flowers don't even get mildly warm, which is what makes them Flowers in the first place."
"It's possible she doesn't know about the hot part, but she's definitely settled in the wrong district," Kylin answered, meeting the other man's eyes as he rubbed at his face. "She mentioned something about her experiences in night houses, and when I tried to change the subject to battle she used that to go right back to what was making me wonder how easily leather tears. When she spoke about her Fistmate running his hands over her body and I found myself deciding that rape would be a good hobby to take up, I knew I had to get out of there for a while. I don't know if she knows what it's doing to me, but she's definitely doing it on purpose."
"We should have expected it from the little hellion," Traixe muttered, definitely unhappy. "A proper lady would avoid topics like that, but she finds it amusing to constantly remind everyone that she's more Blade than lady. If you take my advice, the first thing you'll get yourself after the ceremony is a good, heavy strap. She's been needing one across the backside ever since she first learned to walk and talk. If you don't, it's not beyond her to make your life a living hell."
"I think we first have to concentrate on getting her through the ceremony," Kylin said with a concealed grin for the sourness in Traixe's expression. "Once I'm her husband I
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can use my own ways of turning her reasonable, then fall back on yours if mine don't work, is there any sign of how distant or close 1 am to the possibility of being left at the dais without a bride?"
"I think I may have good news there, at least," Traixe said as he brightened and shifted in his chair. "The Duke was right in his opinion of the girl's sense of duty and honor. When I told her the Duke was prepared to take ail the dishonor of disavowing the match on his own shoulders, you should have seen her face. She came out of it fast enough to continue insisting she would not go through with it, but I think she will. She isn't capable of putting her own welfare and desires before those of her father and family."
"She said something about being caught like a fly in a web," Kylin offered, an agreement that rid him of all amusement. "I don't want her feeling like that, Traixe, not even for the short time left before the ceremony. She's my woman now, and I don't want her feeling pain because of me. We've got to think of a way to tell her the truth."
"Even though the truth is most likely to bring her actual harm?" Traixe asked calmly, resisting the urge to react to the look in the light eyes burning at him. "If she finds out about the deception now, you know she's bright enough to realize that everything we've said and done was for the purpose of tricking her into the marriage. It won't matter that that wasn't our original purpose, it will be the only one she's able to see. And what do you suppose she'll do right after that?"
"At the very least, turn around, walk away, and never look back," Kylin sighed, leaning back in his chair in defeat. "Giving Nimram's garbage every chance to reach her. 1 know that's what would happen, I know it, but maybe there's a way of avoiding it. I gave her a chance to slam hard at the character who's being forced down her throat, Traixe, and she refused to take it! If she was a backstabber she would have taken it, but she simply let it pass. How can I go on backstabbing her?"
"You're learning to like her well enough to want her to know and like you," Traixe said, the soft words full of the sympathy he felt. "Your reactions are natural, Lord Kylin, but this isn't the time for them. What you must remember is that she'll refuse to marry you if she learns the truth, even
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though the marriage is the best thing for her. All questions of safety aside, she needs to be married, just like any other woman, and to a man strong enough to give her a good life. Do you want to drive her instead to a man who doesn't care for her as much as you do?"
Kylin knew his silence was answer enough, and that Traixe would take it just that way. His fingers drummed on the arms of his chair, the only outward sign of his inner struggle, the fight to control his temper at the suggestion made. He'd only met his future wife that very day, had spoken to her for what amounted to no more than minutes, and he wasn't an inexperienced child to indulge in infatuation or fall immediately in love with the first female who allowed him in touching distance. He was a man and a King's Fighter, damn it, but the thought of any other man taking that particular woman away from him filled him so full of rage he was ready to explode with it. She was his and was going to stay his, no matter what he had to do. ...
"I think we're going to have to figure out a way of getting you a woman tonight," Traixe said, breaking into Kylin's thoughts. "We might have to end up blindfolding her, but at least your problem will be seen to. I'll speak to the Duke immediately after the Feasting."
Kylin nodded in distraction as he and Traixe rose to their feet, then followed Even's priest to the door. There was too much depending on Kylin for him to refuse the suggestion even if for some odd reason he wanted to, but the King's Fighter found himself privately wondering just how much good another woman would do him. It was Sofaltis he wanted, his bride-to-be who would grin and dare him to impress her, the soft and rounded Sword who would give as good as she got. But it would be another three days before he could have her, another three endless, interminable, eternal, hellishly long, minute-dragging, frustration-filled . . .
The night air was wonderful, especially out there in the dark all alone, especially over that part of the lower battlements. It was still too early for any night-guards to have been posted, so I had all the shadows to myself. I wandered around
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for a while, remembering the fun I'd had there as a child, pretending I was grown up and defending the castle from invaders. Now I was grown, and actually involved in defense of the Duchy, but it wasn't turning out to be the fun I'd thought it would be. My mind kept demanding what I would do if I couldn't chase the Flower away on a permanent basis, and I couldn't find an answer to that. I didn't know what I would do, but the decision would be one to make trouble no matter what it turned out to be.
I sighed without sound and stroked the stone I stood beside, wishing that was the side of the castle that faced the city, wishing I could take the time to circle the battlements until 1 could see the city. I hadn't been out there all that long, but it was time I got back before Traixe sent my bodyguard after me. I would have had them to begin with if Traixe had been around to see me go, and I didn't want them stomping around, ruining my pleasant memories of that place. Better to get back before they were sent, and be grateful my father hadn't thought of it.
I patted the stone one last time and began to turn away, and that's when the arm whipped around my throat and the hand pressed a wet cloth hard over my nose and mouth. I immediately began to struggle against the strength in those arms, instantly realized I was wasting my time, then reached for the dagger in my right boot as fast as I could. I'd already gotten a breath of whatever was on that cloth, and although I'd halted my breathing after that, I could feel the dizziness and lethargy crawling over me. Raising my boot to where my fingers could reach it wasn't easy, not with the fist curled into the chain of my medallion to give my attacker a better grip on me, but after what seemed like an hour my hand closed around the dagger hilt. I jerked it free, reversed it, then stabbed backward.
There was no scream from the one who held me, but he convulsed so hard from the stroke thai the chain in his fist snapped
, and then he was sliding down to the stone we stood on. I tore the cloth free of my face with my left hand and began gulping in the air my lungs were shrieking for, but rather than clearing the muzziness from my head, the air seemed to make it worse. It was pitch dark there on the battlements, so dark I couldn't even see who it was who had
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attacked me, but the more I breathed in and out, the more an odd grayness spread on the black. I suddenly discovered I was down on hands and knees, the stone under me nearly unfelt, and then somehow the cloth was back over my nose and mouth, and the grayness—
"She's well out of it now," a voice whispered, speaking to the shadow who crouched not far from him. "If she'd known enough to wipe away what the cloth had left on her before she breathed again— Well, she didn't, so we're all right. How's he?"
"He'll never hunt again unless he's allowed to' hunt at Home," came the answering whisper, sounding annoyed. "Now we have him to carry as well as her. I wish we could simply leave him, but that would be very unwise. Everyone knows who he takes orders from, and the Duke won't be in the mood to spare anyone after this."
"And we have to hurry," the first voice said, beginning to sound anxious. "He wants her out of the castle as soon as possible, preferably before she's even missed. I don't envy the ones taking her, not with the sort she is. Why would His Holiness want her brought to him rather than simply put out of the way?"
"I don't pretend to do His Holiness' thinking for him," the second voice replied, dismissal in the tone. "We're just fortunate that she was seen leaving the feasting hall alone, and in time to send the hunter after her. She couldn't have heard him approaching, but she was still able to— Well, I wouldn't want her either, so all I can think is that His Holiness must have his reasons. Do you have the weapon she used?"
"Yes, a dagger," the first voice responded. "I'll turn it over along with her sword, but we're fortunate she kept it in her hand. Searching without striking a light can be awkward."
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