by Jody Holford
“Think you’ll ever forgive her?”
“I think I mostly have. I just don’t want her in my life, you know? You’re lucky, Luce. You have a family that loves you. Misses you when you’re not here.” She firmed her lips and tucked her camera back into the bag.
“I know,” was all she said. But inside, she wondered how true it was—at a certain point, didn’t you stop missing someone and just get used to them being absent? She looked up at the sky where the clouds made fluffy pictures and the sun hedged toward noon.
“How long do you think you’ll be home?”
She turned, unsure of how far they had wandered, and started back down the trail. She had a feeling she knew the answer deep down in her soul but was afraid to think about it. Afraid to want it.
“Not long enough to go steady,” she joked.
He stopped her with a hand on her arm, and she closed her eyes to absorb all the sensations. The sun beating down on them was not as warm as the spot where his hand gripped her gently.
If he were looking to have his heart stomped on, torn out, and lit on fire, pursuing Lucy was the way to go. A smart man would walk her home, go back to work, and see if he could connect with a woman at the bar outside of town later tonight.
Lucy had her eyes closed. Her hair was tucked into a braid with little pieces falling out, like she’d been in a hurry and wasn’t really concerned with how she
looked. She was wearing a plain-Jane tank top and a pair of shorts. Simple, dainty sandals, not at all fit for the trail, were on her feet. Yet, there was nothing plain or simple about the way she clung to him when they’d kissed the other night. Nothing ordinary in the heat that was coursing up his arm just from touching her—like he couldn’t touch enough of her at once. He pulled her closer. She let him.
“Who asked you to go steady? Maybe I just want to get laid,” he grinned, knowing that she deserved prettier words than that but knowing she’d run if he said any. She laughed loud and her shoulders released the tension she’d been carrying in them.
“Oh yeah. Because you’re just the type to go for a one-night stand. I bet you have a three-date minimum rule,” she smiled, her body brushing up against his.
“A minimum rule?”
“Yes, dating etiquette 101. Take girl on three dates before trying to get in her pants.”
“Okay, clearly that rule gets taught after high school.”
She laughed again, and he moved his body slightly so she could feel how well they fit together. “Are you leaving tomorrow?” he asked, his voice lower.
“No.”
“Then it wouldn’t be one night.”
“Alex. You know what I mean. I don’t know how long I’m staying. I can’t promise you anything.”
“I’m not sure where I got the reputation that I was holding out for an engagement ring, but I promise I can do casual just fine. You can’t deny there’s heat between us.”
He willed his body to stay calm as she tilted her head, pushed her chin out, and considered him. He tried to focus on the scent of flowers instead of her hair, on the sound of birds instead of her breathing. Breathing was a necessity and should not be found sexy. Yet on Lucy, it was.
“I won’t deny it. What do you mean by casual?” she asked, caution in those heart-stomping eyes. She moved her hands to his chest, which gave him permission to move his to her waist and pull her just a little tighter.
“I mean we enjoy each other while you’re here, and when you need to go, you go.”
“Just like that?”
“Just like that.”
She frowned, narrowing her eyes—measuring him. He ran his hand up her back, catching it slightly on her camera strap. “We’ll just enjoy each other with no strings?”
“Well, as long as no strings means that while we enjoy each other, no one else is enjoying you. Because then I’d have to shoot someone.” She grinned, making his heart pound too hard and his face stretch with a stupid grin.
“Hmm. That would probably not bode well for your job,” she considered, going up onto her tiptoes and nipping the underside of his chin. He should have shaved this morning. Would have if he’d thought Lucy would be this close to him. She didn’t seem to mind.
“No. And I’ll need it to keep me busy once you leave and break my heart,” he whispered teasingly as he gripped the back of her tank top and closed his mouth roughly over hers before she could protest or say anything else.
She tasted like summer—like heat and fresh air all rolled into one. She stole his breath, and when her tongue met his, he wasn’t sure he cared about anything other than this moment, right now. Her. He thought he heard a car alarm off in the distance, but it seemed so far from where he was, wrapped up in Lucy. Her hands found their way under his lightweight shirt that read ALPD on the right pocket. Her touch pulled him back and under at the same time, and he framed her face with his hands, trying to regain a little bit of the control he needed to survive her.
The alarm sounded louder, breaking through the buzzing that he thought was a direct result of his brain overloading with lust. When Lucy pulled leaned away and looked down at his waist, he briefly thought about seeing how secluded the woods really were.
“You’re buzzing,” she said huskily. He yanked her closer, kissed her hard, and felt the vibration of being this close to her run through him. “You have that effect on me.”
“No,” she said, laughing and pushing at his chest, “you’re actually buzzing. Is it your phone?”
He looked down just as his phone sounded again on his hip. Lucy laughed harder, which did nothing to abate his desire, but it did make him grin. “Shit. Whitman,” he snapped.
He held Lucy’s waist as he listened to Dolores’s panicked, screechy voice. At the same time, he heard sirens in the distance. Fire trucks from the closest town coming in to help.
“Son of a bitch! I’m on my way. Call everyone in and tell Mick to meet me on-site.”
He pressed END and hooked the phone back on his belt loop, already moving forward. Lucy followed immediately, concern lacing her words. “What’s wrong?”
“The rec center is on fire.” His pace increased, and he tugged Lucy with him. She stopped, pulling her out of his grasp. “What?”
At her screech, he turned to see a look of panic in her eyes and her mouth hung open in shock.
With a gentler tone, he said, “I don’t know anything. Our local fire department is there, but I need to get there as quick as I can.” He held out his hand and she took it, letting him set the pace. But when she stumbled he stopped again. “Shit. Sorry. You alright?”
She nodded but her voice was strained. “Alex, go. I’ll catch up. Just get there.”
“I don’t want to leave you here alone.”
“Don’t be silly. Go. I’ll be right behind you, but I can’t run with this equipment or in these shoes,” she assured, pushing at him. He nodded grimly and took off, pissed at himself for not being where he was needed.
Chapter Six
The last time Lucy had seen her sister cry had been five years ago when Kate, then sixteen, had realized that her boyfriend’s claim that he “needed time” had actually meant that he “needed to make out, frequently, with other girls.” Lucy had rubbed Kate’s back while she hiccupped through her tears and said she’d never date anyone else again. Lucy had smiled when Kate had calmed down enough to admit she might date but would never fall in love again. And Lucy had hugged her tight when Kate had asked her how something that was once so special could hurt so much. With her twenty-three-year-old wisdom, she knew that her sister would bounce back, date again, and most certainly love again.
Standing beside Kate now, her arm wrapped around her sister’s waist, she didn’t know what to do. She felt like she’d had more wisdom at twenty-three than now and had no words to offer for her sister’s sadness. She didn’t know if a smile or a tighter hug would dry the silent tears spilling down Kate’s cheeks. Lucy stood as Kate did, motionless, soundless, watching he
avily geared firefighters put out the blaze that was destroying the freshly painted, worn down building. Lucy could feel the heat from where they stood behind the tape Alex’s deputies had put up. Charlotte had shown up not long after Lucy and stood on Kate’s other side, her arm overlapping Lucy’s. The angry, orange haze fought back hard as the firemen beat it down with water from varying angles. The smell of wood and smoke thickened the air, making it impossible to breathe in deeply. Alongside the two fire trucks, one from the neighboring county of Cook, were three Angel’s Lake cruisers. Lucy recognized Mick, who had been part of the police department since the dawn of time, talking to Alex.
“We’re doing it for them,” Kate uttered. “What do you mean, sweetie?” Char asked.
Lucy looked over at her sisters. They had several of their mother’s features in common, but Lucy saw the differences between herself and the other two. More than she saw the similarities. Char had their dad’s strength and would say all of the right things. Lucy remained quiet.
Kate crumpled the Kleenex she was holding. “Why would the teens do this when the whole thing is being done for them?”
“We don’t know who did this, honey,” Char said.
“It’s got to be whoever has been putting graffiti all over the buildings and causing trouble around town. It doesn’t make sense for this not to be the same person or people, does it?”
Even Char had no answer for that. The flames were growing weary, giving up against the steady fight of the men in yellow. The voices in the crowd were almost as loud as the roar of the fire. .
“Kate, why don’t we go home? There’s nothing we can do here. Not right now,” Lucy suggested, her arm tightening as people inched closer to see the fading flames uselessly try to regain strength. Alex trudged toward them, a heavy jacket covering him despite the heat. His face was dirty—blackened like he’d played in the ashes, saddened like he had lost something as well. Lucy imagined they all looked similar as ash still floated around them silently.
Alex stopped directly in front of Kate and bent his knees so he could be eye to eye with her.
“Look at me,” he commanded, putting his hands on her shoulders. Lucy and Char continued to hang onto their sister.
“I will find who did this, Kate. I promise you,” he assured with such conviction that Lucy’s heart felt lighter. When he said it, she believed it. She looked at Kate to see if she also felt the truth in Alex’s words. More silent tears streamed, and Kate bit her lip, nodding in agreement. Alex leaned forward and kissed Kate’s cheek with genuine affection. Lucy’s heart squeezed with an uncomfortable tightness.
“Go home. I’ll come by later with an update. You don’t need to be here for any more of this,” he suggested, turning his gaze on Lucy. His eyes changed slightly, his gaze softening in a way she hoped only she would notice. “Take her home. Get cleaned up and have something to eat. I’ll come by, okay?”
The three sisters nodded and navigated their way through the curious onlookers. No one spoke directly to Kate, but Lucy heard the murmurs of “so sorry,” “such a shame,” and “poor girl.”
“What a fucking mess,” Sam assessed, hands on his jean-clad hips. The trucks and the crowd had gone. The sun was almost done for the day, and so was Alex. His head hurt, his body hurt, and his heart hurt. The rec center lay in blackened bits and pieces, ruined by someone with nothing better to do than tear apart his town.
“That’s an understatement. Fire chief said it was deliberate. Figures they used gasoline-soaked cloths to start it up. Doesn’t take long for something like this to rage out of control,” Alex sighed, running his hand through his smoke-matted hair.
“So they’re not only assholes but they’re idiots, too?”
“Pretty much. I need to know you can fix this. I told Kate that I’d come by with an update. I want to be able to tell her that you can put it back together.”
“Shit, Alex. There’s no fixing this. It’s a do-over.”
“But you can do it?”
“Sure, you know, with all my spare time these days, I’ll just draft up some plans and get started tomorrow,” Sam snapped without feeling. He glared at Alex and walked forward to where the building looked like it had crumbled.
“Don’t be a dick,” Alex returned.
Sam scoffed and shook his head while Alex followed him around the decimated lot.
“You want to say that everything will be okay. You can sugar coat it for Kate, but this is going to take work. And money.”
“The city must have insurance. Once the fire inspector signs off on it as arson, they should be able to move forward with a claim,” Alex mulled. The sky was a fuzzy, unwelcome grey even though the fire had been put out for a while now.
“Who the hell would do this?”
“I don’t know. Not for sure anyway. But I will find out. And whoever it is will wish they’d chosen a different town to screw with.” Sam grinned at his friend and gave him a hard clap on the back.
“Looks like you have your work cut out for you. No more lounging in your office with a box of donuts.”
Alex shook his head and treated his friend to a one finger salute, but he also smiled for the first time all afternoon.
Chapter Seven
“What are you working on, honey?” Julie asked as she padded into the kitchen, coming to stand behind Lucy where she sat at the long and wide, wood- planked dining table. As a girl, she had done her homework at this table.
Looking over her shoulder, Lucy saw her mom’s eyes were wrought with concern. Little creases marred the corners, and Lucy could see her biting at the inside of her cheek—something Lucy did, too, when her thoughts weren’t settled. Julie’s hair framed her face in loose curls that made her look younger. She smelled like mint and Lucy breathed her in as she rested her head against her for a brief moment. Her mom stroked her hair gently and something twisted inside of her stomach.
“I’m doing up some brochures. I thought that I could offer photography as a trade for townspeople pitching in with the center,” Lucy said. She straightened and scrolled through the screen, showing Julie the brightly colored document she had been working on. “How’s Kate?”
“She’s alright. She’s tough like all my girls. She’s lying down. I was going to make some soup. You know that there’s actually a link between soup and feeling better, don’t you?” Julie asked as she peeked a little closer at the brochure.
“Uh—sure.”
“So you’ll take photos in exchange for what? Money?”
Julie moved to the cupboard, her flowing sweater waving behind her, and rooted around for some soul-healing soup. Lucy stretched her arms above her head, yawning.
“Money, labor, supplies. Whatever they have to give. Anything.”
Lucy felt cooped up even though she had spent a good portion of the day outside. Even after showering, she could still smell the fire and taste the ashes on her lips. She pushed back from the table to grab a drink. As her mom opened a couple cans of soup, she eyed Lucy with a bit of doubt.
“Why would someone give supplies and labor for a few photos?”
Lucy’s jaw tightened and she fought back the irritation. Her family didn’t truly understand the depth of her talent. She didn’t need them to build up her ego, but it would be nice if they recognized that not every photographer’s work was featured in National Geographic, Cosmo, and Rolling Stone—all of which were on her résumé.
When Char had become a dentist, they’d rented a hall and held a celebration. They were planning something similar for Kate when she graduated with her degree in social work. When Lucy had graduated, they wondered why she would go to school to study something that was clearly a hobby. She had taken off on her first trek to Europe before any celebrations could be mentioned or overlooked. They had never purposely made her feel less, but standing beside them did that all on its own. They were proud of her; she knew that, most of the time. Still, it would be nice if they understood the measure of her success. Before she’d
gotten fired, of course.
“People love to be photographed, mom. High-quality photography isn’t cheap. People are doing photo shoots of everything these days—not just weddings. And I’m not just an average photographer. I’m offering something they’ll want in return for something that the rec center needs. You’ll see,” Lucy said. Her tone was clipped, but she didn’t try to soften it. Her mom mumbled a “Hmm,” as she continued to stir.
Lucy busied herself by grabbing drinks and bowls, setting them down roughly on the counter. From the window over the sink, she saw Alex trudging up his porch steps, his grimy jacket slung over his shoulder. Her heart ached for him. It wasn’t hard to see how much pride he took in taking care of this town and the people in it
“I think it’s nice you want to do something to help Kate, honey. I think it matters to her that you’re home. Probably a lot now. You want some of this soup?” Julie asked, dishing up the miniature, oddly formed vegetables in red broth. Lucy shook her head, still staring at Alex’s house, even though he’d gone inside.
“Nah. I’m going to go check on Alex.”
“He’s such a good man. I have no doubt he’ll find who did this,” Julie replied, kissing Lucy’s cheek before picking up a bowl of soup to take to Kate. She didn’t doubt it either, but until he did, he would blame himself for this and whatever else might happen.
The shower had washed away the grime, but not the heaviness that sat in the pit of his stomach. He pulled on a pair of athletic shorts and towel dried his hair a bit more before tossing the towel into the laundry. Wandering into the kitchen with the intention of getting a beer, he almost tripped over Furball. Swallowing a curse, he leaned down to pet the cat, which had stopped him in his path for that very reason.
“I know, bud. You’re being neglected.”
Furball meowed in agreement and followed Alex to the kitchen. Alex dumped some food in a bowl and after setting the dish down, he ran his hand along the cat’s back. He grabbed a beer for himself; he’d think about food later. Turning on the T.V., he leaned back on his couch right when the doorbell rang.