“But we must ship out in four days or we are stranded.” The captive kept speaking through Banessa’s next blow.
“You must not do anything. Have you forgotten your debt to me so soon? You were stranded the hour you decided to attack my family. If any further damage comes to him, or to any other member of my family on this planet, I will hold you and your family personally responsible. The records of the Home world do not contain accounts of blood feuds as severe as I will pursue against your face. Take your spouses and leave this establishment. You may take residence at the Brigada. Leave.” Morgan turned away in time to see Tim being helped down the stairs by Isaac.
“Why is he cutting him free? He has to wait for the Sansheren authorities to come for mediation.” Tim’s voice was weak, but Morgan saw his anger and confusion.
“As the highest ranking Sansheren currently on the planet, I am the authority. They have been instructed that if anything happens to you or anyone else I know, they’ll be punished severely.” Morgan moved toward Tim but his expression of hostility confused and frightened her, and she shifted to the bar instead.
“So that’s it? No jail, no nothing? Just be good and stay out of trouble?” Tim asked with a scornful laugh.
“I have stripped them of House and family, they will live on the charity of strangers on an alien planet. I thought it was enough.” Morgan interpreted the scorn in Tim’s voice as a challenge and turned to face him.
Tim’s eyes held hers before they slid down toward her bared breast and then danced about the room.
“Your banner,” Tim whispered, and moved to the dead spacer and her spouse.
“I wanted to honor her.” Morgan’s voice softened, and she moved to stand beside the still grieving wife.
“He... He kept trying to tell me something. I didn’t understand. He grabbed my arm and shouted something. I didn’t understand. When he jumped up and ran after me, I put my back to the wall and drew my gun.”
Everyone in the room listened to Tim’s quiet voice.
“He smiled when I pointed my gun at him; in that pinched face routine of theirs. I was going to shoot him when I heard sounds down the alley. They all came running forward at once. He jumped in front of me, the dumb fuck. I could’ve shot at least one of them if he hadn’t got in front of me. The shot almost ripped him in half, but you know he looked happy when he fell, like saving me was important to him. Someone want to explain this to me?” Tim looked up from the dead spacer’s face with tears in his eyes.
“You’re important to Morgan, so you’re important to them.” Greg gestured at the Sansheren in the room.
“He was wearing Tadesde colors. Are you telling me Morgan is a friend of Tadesde?” Tim’s voice became hard, cold.
“The opposite. These two wanted to defect to Morgan. Saving your ass was the best offer of personal value they could present her.”
As Greg finished speaking, Tim turned to Morgan, a host of questions seen on his face.
“They decided you were a member of my family and one tried to warn you while the other ran for help. It was a noble gesture, don’t you think. Neither one spoke English and they had no weapons. She was happy to give her life for yours because it meant her wife would be guaranteed a place with me. And she is. I’ve taken her wife to be my own.” Morgan smiled down at the one she spoke of, and missed the confused expression on the faces of the other humans in the bar.
“You mean that’s female too?” Tim pointed at the widow in disbelief.
“Of course.” Morgan was confused.
“I told you they were a race of fags and dykes,” Tim said to Greg, who refused to meet his gaze.
“I don’t understand. All Sansheren are female. I told you.” Morgan looked from Tim to Denise and then to Greg.
“Just what the universe needs, a race of lesbians, I’d hate to live with a group of them. Permanent PMS. So tell me, where do babies come from?” Tim elbowed an embarrassed Greg in the side with a forced, bitter laugh.
“Sansheren reproduction is asexual,” Morgan said in a near whisper through the fear that turned to anger and built within her.
“No wonder you’re so screwed up.” Tim shook his head and limped to the stairs.
Denise kept her head down as she started to wipe the blood off of the table.
Greg refused to meet Morgan’s eyes, and he followed Tim up the stairs.
“Take my new wife and her deceased back to our rooms; make arrangements for transportation of her genetics back to the home world. I want her archetype recorded with honors.” Morgan struggled to control her voice as she gave Banessa the orders.
Banessa moved to get everyone out of the bar, leaving behind two of her best people as guards inside the bar.
Tansea placed her hand on Morgan’s as she walked to the bar.
Isaac sighed as he moved to the stairway.
“It’s empty.” Morgan said as she picked up a wine glass from the bar.
“Here.” Denise moved behind the bar and took the glass from Morgan’s unresponsive fingers. Nothing was said between the two women as Denise filled a clean wine glass. She set the bottle in front of Morgan, and moved to sit beside Sam at the far side of the room.
“He’s judging us by what he saw from Tadesde. That dishonorable, nameless bitch,” Morgan said to no one; Tansea was the only one close enough to hear.
“He can only relate to what he knows. You cannot expect him to forget so much pain quickly.” Tansea moved closer to Morgan and refilled her glass from the wine bottle.
“But we’re not like Tadesde. She’s insane, why can’t he see that? They say she hunted her own child once. She’s evil,” Morgan said in monotone English. She never raised her gaze from her glass.
“Someone will stop Tadesde. You must worry about your family and your friends.” Tansea took the small sip from her own glass.
“With Sansheren our friends are our family. You’re right, someone will stop Tadesde - I will. It’s time I quit living off the charity of my beloved Neadesto and made a place for myself.” Morgan drank her glass of wine without tasting it and poured a refill, which she also downed.
“You have made a place for yourself: Bystocc. Your future is secured. If Tim is to be a part of it, he must learn to accept you as you are. Tadesde is a member of the Twelfth rank; she is beyond your reach. Forget her,” Tansea said, and Morgan decided to launch a personal attack against Tadesde. A suicide plan, that as simple as it was, gave her comfort.
“Tim won’t accept me because he thinks we’re all as bad as Tadesde. If I kill her maybe he will forgive me for the harm she has done. Maybe.” Morgan looked at Denise and called for a writing board.
Denise did not respond, and Morgan realized she and Tansea were speaking in Sansheren when a member of the security detachment crossed the room to hand her the requested implement.
“Child, you’re upset. Let it wait until morning. Speak with him then. He’ll grow to understand. It was a shock and it takes time.” Tansea filled the empty wine glass one last time before moving across the room to sit with Sam and Denise.
#
“How dare you treat her that way!” Isaac shouted. “Of course she went native. She’s had no human contact for over fifteen years. It’s a miracle she held on to her humanity at all. And then you come along: the Almighty from her childhood, and tell her she’s screwed up!” Isaac did not release Tim’s eyes as he paused for breath.
“She quit thinking in English years ago, as a human being she’s no older than twelve or thirteen. And she still has a crush on you. You’re an idiot and worse. She was rescued by a race that is both male and female at the same time: she was neutered by an alien doctor, and you feel you have the right to tell her she’s screwed up? Of course she’s screwed up, how could she be anything but? After what she went through, it’s a wonder she’s sane, let alone the ruler of a planet with tens of thousands begging to be her subjects.” Isaac continued to stare at Tim long after his words fled the room.
&n
bsp; “What do you mean she was neutered? I knew the Sansheren were barbaric, but, why?” Tim tried to sit forward in the bed but discovered himself exhausted.
“The Sansheren didn’t do it,” Isaac said in disgust. “She was dumped on Faldebbia. Their doctors had never dealt with the human female before. They didn’t understand her menstrual cycle. She was just a kid. No one had explained it to her. They didn’t understand the bleeding would stop on its own, so they removed her uterus and ovaries. Without them, she couldn’t develop physically. I met her at about the same time she found Sam. I offered to start her on hormone replacements, but she didn’t agree until she discovered there was a chance you were alive. Of course she’s a little screwed up! That kid’s in love with you!” Isaac said and didn't wait for a response to his explanation. He stormed out of the room, and his momentum carried him down the stairs. He stood in the doorway watching Morgan for a few minutes without her noticing. She looked defeated, and he watched as she smeared a tear through her makeup and continued writing.
“She’s getting drunk and trying to write a suicide note.” Tansea crossed the room and whispered to him.
“Is there a real danger?” Isaac could not take his eyes off of the beautiful woman that Morgan had become, as she erased the writing board and started again.
“She thinks she’ll challenge Tadesde,” Tansea said with a shrug.
Denise moved back to the bar and poured Morgan a drink from a new bottle. “I’ll always love him too,” Denise said, and poured her own drink as she spoke.
Morgan made eye contact with her as they both drank.
“Well at least she can’t try tonight.” Isaac motioned Tansea to lead the way out of the bar.
#
“She had lilacs in her hair. Do you remember?” Tim was still staring at the door Isaac had left through minutes before.
“Do you still have them?” Greg’s voice was quiet, with no inflection. They both knew the answer, even as Tim smiled and reached into his pocket for a small pouch.
“I want to keep remembering her the way she was. She’s so hard now. She doesn’t need me. Hell, she doesn’t need anyone,” Tim said as he opened the pouch and rubbed his finger against the small mound of dust in the bottom.
“Maybe she needs to think she needs someone. Maybe she needs to be a girl, a woman, with someone,” Greg said without looking at Tim. He didn’t alter his gaze when no response came to his comment, and the silence built.
#
“Honey if you really want him, just go up and get him.” Denise leaned forward across the bar.
Morgan was too drunk to notice how intoxicated Denise had become. “I wouldn’t know what to do,” Morgan said in an audible voice as she stared into her wine glass.
“Aw hell. You don’t have to do anything. Just march up those stairs and climb in bed with him. He won’t kick you out.” Denise giggled as she poured them both yet another drink.
“Do I look okay?” Morgan tried to focus on her image in the wall mirror behind Denise.
“Here, let me help,” Denise said and moved between Morgan and the blurry mirror.
“Hand me a wash rag, please. He didn’t like my makeup.” Morgan started to wash her face and neck.
Denise moved her hand to Morgan’s face. Placing her hand against Morgan’s cheek, she felt an overwhelming urge to cry.
“Wear your hair down, child. Now go.” Denise said, and turned away from Morgan, leaving her to finish her preparations alone.
Morgan stared at the blurring mirror as she unfastened the tie that held her long black hair back. In the mirror, she saw herself un-aged, frozen at twelve years old, small red lips standing out from her pale olive skin. The river of black crossed over her shoulder, and she tried to steer her hair to cover her small, bannerless breast. It just reached the bottom, but the hair insisted on parting around the peak and giving teasing glimpses with every move. She looked at herself one last time, shrugged, gulped the last of her wine, and pushed herself away from the bar.
As she moved across the tavern room, gravity seemed to pull her to the stairwell. Morgan walked to the stairs and began to climb.
Holding onto the banister, Morgan paused to stifle a laugh that threatened to escape her control. She stood, trying to remember why she was in the stairwell, but the urge to laugh remained. Drunk and tired, she decided she was climbing the stairs to go sleep off the effects of the alcohol she could vaguely remember drinking.
“Aw hell. You don’t have to do anything. Just march up those stairs and climb in the bed…” the image of Denise overwhelmed her sense of time. She knew Denise had been trying to tell her something else, but she couldn’t focus on her words any longer. The laughter was swelling up within her, and she decided to give in to it. A single tear slid down her cheek as the laughter evaporated.
Morgan stood at the top of the staircase and looked down the long hallway before her. One doorway, the second to the left, beckoned her. A sense of unease and sorrow hit her unprepared as she approached it.
Tim was there, she remembered. She knew why she had come up the stairs and what Denise had told her. Still she stood, poised with her hand on the doorknob, and she felt a second tear join the first in its slow journey down her face.
“Hi.” The door was open. She couldn’t remember turning the knob, but she realized she had been standing in the doorway for some time, and tried to say something in explanation. She wanted to explain to Tim how she felt, why she was there - not for the reason Denise suggested, but just to talk. To try to explain everything that had happened to her; to hear everything that had happened to him. To talk and to see him, just to be in the room with him and watch him speak, was all she wanted.
“Hi,” was what came out of the overwhelming desire she felt.
“Hi yourself, kid.” Tim smiled, before turning his gaze from her and nodding to Greg.
Greg smiled, in a sad but hopeful manner, before he stood and walked toward the door. He took Morgan’s hand from the door knob, and with his other hand on her shoulder, he pushed her further into the room as he left.
The door closed with little sound to disturb the tableau that was building in the room.
It was a small, dirty room. The walls were brown, the floor had once been white, and an uncurtained window showed the wall of the building across the alley. Tim lay in the middle of a soft looking cushion that was placed on top of a raised platform, a bed, Morgan thought, and for a brief moment the laughter threatened to return. The blankets that covered him were deep emerald green, and Morgan was surprised to find herself noticing how clean and inviting the entire bed looked.
She walked across the room, but stopped when she got to the bed. Afraid to sit and embarrassed to be standing beside him, she knelt at the head of the bed; her face came even with his.
“Shit,” Tim whispered, and Morgan bowed her head in response. Her hair covered her face and blocked the light for her.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
Tim reached forward and moved the hair from about the left side of her face.
“You’ll always be beautiful,” Tim said with his hand on the back of her neck; he pulled her closer and tilted her face to him.
“I didn’t keep my promise, I took a wife.” Morgan looked deep into his eyes and didn’t understand the smile she watched fade into pain.
“So did I, so did I.” The pain in Tim’s eyes faded away as he pulled her to him and kissed her closed lips gently. His hand on her neck, he guided her forward until she was leaning over him and he was lying flat on the bed.
Long after the kiss ended, she moved away and stood before him. Without breaking his eye contact, she reached behind her and unfastened her remaining banner. It fell to the floor and was joined by her pants.
Tim ran his gaze down her body and back to her eyes before lifting the bed covers aside and holding his hand up to her.
Morgan paused to remove her sandals.
#
“I would bear your ch
ildren, my love,” Morgan said several hours later as she lay curled against Tim’s side. The sweat had cooled from her body, but not the pain.
“Hey, don’t worry about it. It’s just as well; children can be very complicated off Earth.” Tim’s voice was brusque, and she felt herself near to tears over the pain she imagined he had endured.
“Let’s just sleep together now,” he said and moved her face to his and kissed her once more.
#
“I love you,” Tim whispered as he woke up. He reached beside him to discover he spoke to an empty bed.
“Hey, sleepy head. These just came for you.” Denise waved to Tim as he exited the stairway. The items in question were a vase of bluish green flowers. The bar was filled with the overpowering odor of lilacs.
“Read the note.” Sam pointed to a writing board clipped to the side of the vase.
It was never my intention to complicate your life. I have to leave. I hope I can see you again when I have a chance to return to Wergol. Right now my honor demands I address the insults Tadesde has done my family. I have been informed that she is at this moment petitioning for a hearing by the council of the Great Houses. She claims bias in the Arbitration, and I must attend the council. I am sorry to have disrupted your life.
Your humble servant,
Morgan
“Damn,” Tim slammed the writing board down and stalked out of the bar; shoving past a surprised Greg.
“Here,” was Denise’s response to Greg’s puzzled look.
Greg read the note out loud to the silent room before rushing out to find Tim.
Chapter Twenty One - Earth 1998
Turning her head to get the sun out of her eyes, Morgan noticed them. They were marching across the sidewalk, down the small hill, and onto her plate of uneaten food before retracing their path. Morgan reached forward and killed one of the small black ants. She focused her entire mind on the crunch of squishing the ants. She did not let her attention drift even after she had killed all those within her reach.
Obligations Page 19