Praise for Walking Home
“Sonia Choquette’s book Walking Home: A Pilgrimage
from Humbled to Healed is real, raw, and honest. As she
walks an ancient pilgrimage to work through her devastating loss,
grief, and abandonment, she finds the way back to a place
of genuine forgiveness and healing. As we, the reader,
walk with her, we find the same for ourselves.”
— Jack Canfield, co-author of the
Chicken Soup for the Soul® series
“Brilliant! Sonia Choquette takes us on a pilgrimage of the
heart. She introduces us to places and people that offer timeless
wisdom and sacred teachings for our own life journey.”
— Robert Holden, Ph.D., author of
Happiness NOW! and Loveability
“Sonia’s book Walking Home: A Pilgrimage from
Humbled to Healed is grounded and inspiring, and
her courage in making this arduous pilgrimage helps
others live by their authentic voice and spirit.”
— Chaz Ebert, publisher of Ebert Digital, president of Ebert
Productions, and vice president of The Ebert Company
“Sonia Choquette has a pilgrim’s ardor. Join her on the trail to
an authentic self. Witness her passion and her humility. Prepare
yourself to be inspired. Every footstep, every word, is a blessing.”
— Julia Cameron, author of The Artist’s Way
ALSO BY SONIA CHOQUETTE
Books/Oracle Cards
The Answer Is Simple … Love Yourself, Live Your Spirit!
The Answer Is Simple Oracle Cards
Ask Your Guides: Connecting to Your Divine Support System
Ask Your Guides Oracle Cards
Diary of a Psychic: Shattering the Myths
The Fool’s Wisdom Oracle Cards
Grace, Guidance, and Gifts: Sacred Blessings to Light Your Way
The Intuitive Spark: Bringing Intuition Home to Your Child,
Your Family, and You
Soul Lessons and Soul Purpose: A Channeled Guide to Why You Are Here
Soul Lessons and Soul Purpose Oracle Cards
The Time Has Come … to Accept Your Intuitive Gifts!
Traveling at the Speed of Love
Trust Your Vibes at Work, and Let Them Work for You
Trust Your Vibes Oracle Cards
Trust Your Vibes: Secret Tools for Six-Sensory Living
Tune In: Let Your Intuition Guide You to Fulfillment and Flow
Vitamins for the Soul: Daily Doses of Wisdom for Personal Empowerment
CD Programs
Ask Your Guides: How to Connect with
Your Spiritual Support System (6-CD and 4-CD sets)
Attunement to Higher Vibrational Living,
with Mark Stanton Welch (4-CD set)
Meditations for Receiving Divine Guidance, Support, and Healing (2-CD set)
The Power of Your Spirit: Use It Now! (4-CD set)
Trust Your Vibes at Work, and Let Them Work for You (4-CD set)
Trust Your Vibes: Secret Tools for Six-Sensory Living (6-CD set)
All of the above are available at your
local bookstore, or may be ordered by visiting:
Hay House USA: www.hayhouse.com®
Hay House Australia: www.hayhouse.com.au
Hay House UK: www.hayhouse.co.uk
Hay House South Africa: www.hayhouse.co.za
Hay House India: www.hayhouse.co.in
Copyright © 2014 by Sonia Choquette
Published and distributed in the United States by: Hay House, Inc.: www.hayhouse.com® • Published and distributed in Australia by: Hay House Australia Pty. Ltd.: www.hayhouse.com.au • Published and distributed in the United Kingdom by: Hay House UK, Ltd.: www.hayhouse.co.uk • Published and distributed in the Republic of South Africa by: Hay House SA (Pty), Ltd.: www.hayhouse.co.za • Distributed in Canada by: Raincoast Books: www.raincoast.com • Published in India by: Hay House Publishers India: www.hayhouse.co.in
Design: Tricia Breidenthal
Interior photos: Courtesy of the author
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced by any mechanical, photographic, or electronic process, or in the form of a phonographic recording; nor may it be stored in a retrieval system, transmitted, or otherwise be copied for public or private use—other than for “fair use” as brief quotations embodied in articles and reviews—without prior written permission of the publisher.
The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Choquette, Sonia.
Walking home : a pilgrimage from humbled to healed / Sonia Choquette. -- 1st edition.
pages cm
ISBN 978-1-4019-4451-3 (hardcover : alk. paper) 1. Choquette, Sonia. 2. Spiritual biography. 3. Pilgrims and pilgrimages--Spain--Santiago de Compostela. I. Title.
BL73.C393A3 2007
204.092--dc23
[B]
2014011698
Hardcover ISBN: 978-1-4019-4451-3
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
1st edition, September 2014
Printed in the United States of America
To my father, Albert Paul Choquette, and my brother, Bruce Anthony.
Thank you for helping me find my way home.
CONTENTS
Preface
Part I: The Humbling
1: Death
2: Humpty Dumpty
3: Spiraling Downward
4: A Pilgrimage?
5: Making the Decision
6: Getting Ready
7: Two Backpacks and Counting
8: Taking the Pressure Off
9: Packing Up
10: The Last Night at Home
11: Chicago to Paris
12: Get Ready, Get Set
Part II: The Healing
Day 1: Saint-Jean-Pied-de-Port to Roncesvalles
Day 2: Roncesvalles to Zubiri
Day 3: Zubiri to Pamplona
Day 4: Pamplona to Puente la Reina
Day 5: Puente la Reina to Estella
Day 6: Estella to Los Arcos
Day 7: Los Arcos to Logroño
Day 8: Logroño to Nájera
Day 9: Nájera to Santo Domingo de la Calzada
Day 10: Santo Domingo to Belorado
Day 11: Belorado to San Juan de Ortega
Day 12: San Juan to Burgos
Day 13: Burgos to Hornillos del Camino
Day 14: Hornillos del Camino to Castrojeriz
Day 15: Castrojeriz to Frómista
Day 16: Frómista to Carrión de los Condes
Day 17: Carrión to Calzadilla de la Cueza
Day 18: Calzadilla de la Cueza to Sahagún
Day 19: Sahagún to El Burgo Ranero
Day 20: El Burgo Ranero to Mansilla de las Mulas
Day 21: Mansilla de las Mulas to León
Day 22: León to Mazarife
Day 23: Mazarife to Astorga
Day 24: Astorga to Rabanal del Camino
Day 25: Rabanal to Ponferrada
Day 26: Ponferrada to Villafranca del
Bierzo
Day 27: Villafranca to O Cebreiro
Day 28: O Cebreiro to Triacastela
Day 29: Triacastela to Sarria
Day 30: Sarria to Portomarín
Day 31: Portomarín to Palas de Rei
Day 32: Palas de Rei to Arzúa
Day 33: Arzúa to Amenal
Day 34: Amenal to Santiago de Compostela
Afterword
Acknowledgments
About the Author
PREFACE
My name is Sonia Choquette, and I have been an intuitive coach, guide, and spiritual mentor for most of my life. From the time I was a teenager, I have helped lift people up, show them the way out of problems, and guide them toward solutions. It’s been my gift, passion, and purpose to do this for others; and over the course of 35 years, I’ve had the honor of serving tens of thousands of people through one-on-one consultations, workshops, my website, and more than 20 books.
Drawing from my own life challenges, and the benefit of having masterful mentors from an early age, I’ve sharpened my five senses to a high degree and also awakened my sixth sense, which has served me well. Whether teaching or coaching, I am guided by intuition as well as my own past experiences. I don’t draw from theory, but rather from what I’ve learned in the trenches.
I have traveled the world over sharing tools and techniques to help others overcome obstacles, heal heartache, find their passion, activate and follow their intuition, and succeed in their goals. And I have loved every minute of it, feeling profoundly grateful for the blessing of being able to be of service in a way that is so fulfilling and satisfying to me.
I’ve never allowed a thing to stop me, slow me down, get in my way, or trap me in a corner—and have taught others to do the same—fearlessly meeting life head-on rather than running away or letting it overwhelm me. That is, until suddenly, in the course of six weeks, both my father and brother unexpectedly died … and my life fell apart. All that I thought I had risen above, outsmarted, or refused to be bothered by came crashing down on me at once; and I was buried alive in an avalanche of sorrow, grief, and pain.
None of the tools I had used in the past helped me to feel better or find my ground.
Overcome with shame and a sense of personal failure, I found I could no longer teach or counsel others. Instead, I had to return to the state of novitiate—to confront all of the unhappiness and pain I thought I’d left behind and relearn from scratch the fundamental lessons of humility and compassion. I was able to achieve this through the practice of pilgrimage—specifically, by walking the Camino de Santiago, a more than 800-kilometer (500-mile) trek over the Pyrenees and across northern Spain. It was only through this process of sacrifice and self-abnegation that I was able to reconnect with my authentic self and recover a sense of inner peace.
Here is my story.
1
Death
On August 19, 2008, I received a frantic call from my older sister Cuky (pronounced “Cookie”) at just after seven in the morning.
“Oh my God, Sonia,” she said, as if she had just been punched in the stomach. “Bruce died!”
“What?” I said, shaking myself out of the deep slumber I was in only moments ago.
“Bruce died.”
“No!” I responded in shock. “When? How? What do you mean?” I pummeled her with question after question, confused and disbelieving.
“He died in his sleep last night. In Durango.”
“You’re kidding. I can’t believe it,” I responded, completely in shock.
Breathing deeply, and now speaking more calmly than ever, but still clearly shaken, she assured me it was true. “Yes, honey. He died in his sleep.”
“Oh no! Bruce!” I cried, realizing my brother had slipped out of my life forever. “I just talked to him two days ago. He asked me for the Rolling Stones documentary Shine a Light for his birthday. I just ordered it for him. He can’t be gone.”
“I know. It’s unbelievable,” she answered, sounding as stunned as I now was.
“How did you find out?” I asked. “Who told you?”
“Noelle called. Bruce’s girlfriend called her and let her know. She was afraid to call Mom and Dad.”
“Do they know yet?”
“Yes, Noelle went over there and told them in person about an hour ago.”
Poor Noelle. She was always the kid in the family to do the hard things like this.
“How are they?” I asked, suddenly afraid for them, especially for my mom. They were not young. How would they take this news? They were both so devoted to taking care of Bruce.
“I’m not sure. I’m going to call now and check on them. Call Noelle.”
I hung up the phone and stared into space. My brother had had a difficult life. He’d struggled with schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, addiction, and depression, as well as a whole slew of physical ailments ever since he was a teenager. But he always seemed to hang in there and had recently seemed to be doing much better.
He was a difficult brother to have, because of both his illnesses and his stubborn temperament. We all loved him very much and tried our best to support him, but he was willful and did things his own way, which at times was self-serving and shortsighted, causing an awful lot of drama in the family, especially for our parents.
At heart he was mostly just a kid. He was a drummer and played in bands for much of his life. That’s what led to his drug problems more than anything. It was part of his rock-and-roll world. He was also an artist, a poet, and a great cook. He loved music; food; friends; his family; and, of course, his kitty cat, Winter Girl. He had a huge heart and never shut himself away in spite of his challenges.
Bruce’s finest achievement was graduating from college with a degree in computer design, which he had only recently completed. Because of his mental illness, it was difficult for him to concentrate, and yet he was determined. Only months earlier, he had walked with all of the other graduates of the University of Colorado, Denver, to receive his diploma. It was a glorious moment in his life, and we were all so proud of him.
Over the years, my parents supported him in every way. While he lived with his girlfriend of many years, it was my parents who made sure his life was on track. Especially my dad.
Because Bruce didn’t drive, Dad drove him to school, to his doctors’ appointments, and to get his groceries. He also helped Bruce pay his bills and take care of the house that his girlfriend owned and in which he lived. He was endless work and wearied us all.
Both parents checked in on Bruce every day, several times a day, and had for years. In fact, my father’s biggest worry was wondering who would take care of Bruce after he died, even though we reassured him that we all would and not to worry. He did worry, though. A lot. Bruce was a handful, and Dad questioned whether we would be able to handle him with the same patience that he had.
Recently we were all feeling very optimistic about Bruce. After what seemed like a lifetime of drama and trauma, he seemed to be feeling and acting better than ever before, and more self-reliant in every way.
His long-standing girlfriend had been transferred from Denver to Durango, Colorado, and he had decided to spend the summer there rather than be apart from her. She had secured a decent job in a pharmacy after also having had a fair amount of emotional and financial setbacks. My family was relieved and encouraged to see each of them standing more and more on their own two feet for a change.
Underneath his illness and drug use, Bruce had a sweet nature. He had the best smile in the world, and to experience it made you immediately smile right back. We were very close when we were young, as he was only a year older than me. We played and plotted as only siblings can do, and managed to get into a lot of trouble while growing up.
That started to change around the age of ten, when he got his first drum set. I was left in the dust for rock-and-roll. Bruce played in a band with my other brother Neil, and then went on to play with many other bands over the years. Unfortunately, along with that
world came a lot of drugs, which scared me to death. I ran away, and he dove in. He tried them all, and some grabbed hold of him, ravaging his mind and body.
Eventually Bruce broke down and needed medical care and treatment, mind and body, to keep him alive and healthy. But once he decided to get well, he stayed the difficult course and seemed to be slowly succeeding, particularly with the help of my father.
We were encouraged and even excited when he decided to move to Durango. That showed he felt strong and confident because he was stepping away from my parents’ daily support.
Once there, he took up yoga to pass the time and keep fit. He lost more than 35 pounds, which was great because he had gained so much weight in his stomach due to the drugs he was taking for his ongoing mental problems. He was proud of this and seemed happier than he had been in a long time.
In fact, I’d just had perhaps the most rewarding conversation in years with him only two days earlier, and so hearing that he was dead was almost impossible to absorb.
Sitting in silence, I prayed for Bruce’s spirit and his peaceful transition. Then I picked up the phone and made a reservation to fly to Denver. It was time to go home and lay him to rest.
The funeral was surreal. My parents, although shattered, were strong and dignified. My dad was mostly quiet and very emotional. He hardly spoke as he fought back the tears, as most men of his generation did. My mom vacillated from being wildly optimistic that Bruce was now in heaven to being genuinely confused and overwhelmed that he had died. She was clearly in shock, and it wasn’t wearing off.
My brothers and sisters and I surrounded them both and did our best to comfort and blanket them from the pain they were no doubt suffering. All I could think of was that he was at last free of a life of physical torment. I was glad for that.
Six weeks later, I traveled to Japan to teach a workshop. It was a quick trip, and I returned home after five short days. When I landed, I received a message on my voice mail that my husband, Patrick, would be meeting me inside the terminal, which was something he never did. If anything, because I travel so much, if he picked me up at all, he usually just pulled up to the curb at the airport and I jumped in the car once I had my bag. Sometimes I just took a cab home. Coming inside to meet me was all wrong, and so was his voice. Suddenly I was scared.
Walking Home: A Pilgrimage from Humbled to Healed Page 1