“I…I apologize and it was never my intention to hurt you. I would never lay my hands on a woman. I will not turn into my father… I will not turn into my father.” He turned his back on me and he was muttering this underneath his breath. It was like he couldn’t stop and when I placed my hand on his shoulder in a soothing manner, he turned with tears in his eyes. “Don’t look at me.” He was obviously ashamed by what he had done and that had manifested into an emotional upheaval inside.
“It’s OK, I’m perfectly fine and you did no permanent damage. I understand that things got heated and you did something that you shouldn’t have. Everybody is guilty of that and you don’t have to punish yourself for something that was beyond your control.” My hand on his shoulder felt the muscles underneath and I instantly sighed with excitement.
He sat down in a nearby chair, completely overtaken by something that had happened in his past. I could see that he was dealing with it, but he must have felt like he was following in the footsteps of his father. I was pretty good at reading people and Paul was a bit more transparent than people gave him credit for.
“All I’ve ever really wanted was to get out from underneath the shadow of my father. I’ve seen the way that he treated my mother and I never want to go and do the same thing. I pride myself on giving women the respect that they deserve. For me to manhandle you like that is repulsive and you shouldn’t be even able to look at me anymore. It doesn’t matter what you’ve done. There is no instant that permits someone do something like that to a lady. I just want to crawl into a hole and die.” I could’ve used this, as a way to leave, but for some reason I felt like I needed to be there for him.
I didn’t even like him, but that was slowly changing into a form a pity that made me look at him in a different way. I felt sorry for the way that he was raised and that his father would take liberties in such a manner. “You’re not your father. I’m sure that there are days that you look in the mirror and you see his eyes looking back. It doesn’t mean that you’re the same person and that you’re going to follow in his footsteps. You probably find yourself doing things that he would’ve done and then you change your behavior because of it. I understand all that, but you need to give yourself a break.” His softer side had made me feel for him and that was the one thing that I wasn’t expecting from any of this.
“I don’t deserve your compassion, Wilma.” He didn’t know my real name and I felt that if he could be honest with me with his feelings, then I could be honest with him with my name. I was risking a lot more than the money in my hands by doing something like that. I just couldn’t help it and I needed to show him that I was not infallible. I needed to show him that life makes people do unexpected things for the right reasons.
“I have a confession to make and my name isn’t Wilma. I used that to get in here, I think you knew that. This is not who I am and I can’t pretend to be something that I’m not. My real name is Brenda Bauer. You could turn me in and have me arrested for theft, but maybe you should listen to what I have to say first. I’m not going to use any of the money for myself and you may not believe that, but it’s true. I’m going to give this to a worthy cause and one that you would probably be on board with. Your love of animals is evident in the way that you talk about Rodrick. I’m going to give up all this money to an animal shelter that needs it more than anybody else.” I wasn’t sure if that was true, but it was in my head. I felt deeply for the animals and wasn’t going to allow any one of them to suffer, if I had anything to say about it.
“I think that we should get out of here and go someplace a little bit more private to talk about this. I can’t be seen blubbering like a little baby. If you feel safe around me, then I hope that you will come with me willingly. I’m not going to force you and you have no reason to worry that I’m going to turn you in. I think that the money that you have gotten that won’t be missed from a crowd like this. They might notice that a few checks did not make its way into the coffers, but that will be swept underneath the rug. I think that what you should be worried about is when the accountants get a hold of the books. They’ll see that the money that was given to charity was in the name of the animal hospital. If they are any good, they’ll have questions and will need answers from those that are in their confidence.” I hadn’t thought about that, but I guess he did make a valid point.
“I guess I’m going to have to deal with that, but hopefully they will be oblivious and won’t give a damn where the money went. Most accountants will only ask the pertinent questions. When they find out that it was for charity, they’ll probably gloss over the fact that their client used that kind of money to give to charity. They probably won’t ask any questions, because they’ll know that it went to a worthy cause.” I don’t know who I was trying to convince. I knew that deep down that things could go terribly awry and yet I had every intention of following through.
We went down the stairs and I followed behind and looked at his ass in those pants. I wanted to peel them down and give myself a taste. He looked like everyone else in the black tie affair that had money to burn. I could feel his fingers in my hand were not, as tight as before and I think that he was consciously aware of the strength that he was using. He was making a point to lessen his grip and allow me the feeling of not being some kind of prisoner.
He was on the phone and I heard him say something about bringing the car around to the back entrance. That would mean that he had a driver sitting out there waiting for instructions. “I think that it might be prudent that I get this money into the proper hands. Paul, your contribution is quite significant and I’m going to give you this one chance to take it back. It’s the lease that I can do.” I was hoping that this might be a good way to keep him from turning me over to the authorities. I was praying that he wasn’t going to take me up on my offer, but I needed to make the effort.
“Like I said, the money is not that important to me. It was the principle of the thing and I guess I got a little carried away. I certainly don’t need the money and that might sound callous, but I don’t really know what else to say. I could take it back, but then I will probably only use it to buy something like an island or some extravagant airplane that has just come out on the market. You’re saving me from making a mistake and having my father look at me with disapproval again. I think I use my money to make him feel uncomfortable I make sure to show it off any time that I go back home.”
“It might sound crazy, what I’m about to say, but I think that you might need to mend a few fences with your father. You’ve been keeping this in for a very long time and it’s about time that you finally have a face to face talk with him. I understand that it might not be a conversation that you want to have, but in order to get past it; you’re going to have to tell him how you feel. I know that that’s not something that you want to do and that you’ve been avoiding it for all of your life. You can’t hold back these kinds of feelings. They’re only going to fester deep inside, until they turn into something that is going to cause you bodily harm.”
“I’m happy the way things are and to shake things like that to the surface will only make for a very tense moment between the two of us. Believe me, I know that you’re right and that I should confront him, but I’m not sure that I have it in me to do something like that. I haven’t seen them in a while, but I think that his domineering ways was passed down from one generation to the next.”
I stopped off at the animal hospital and put those five checks into the mailbox. They were going to get one hell of a surprise in the morning. I got back in the car and he was beaming with pride. Taking control of his emotions had allowed him to realize that he had been treating people in the exact same way that his father treated him. He needed to make a clean break and the best way to do that was to act in the best interest of others.
He had us driven to a nearby lookout point. We walked down to the water’s edge and lay there looking at the stars.
Chapter four
“Paul, I really didn�
�t like you. You seemed too full of yourself and you gave the impression that you didn’t care about anyone. I think that deep down you knew that you were falling into the old trap of your father. I just shined a light on it and you could finally see that you were taking your lead from him. I know that you never wanted to, but sometimes these things can get out of hand. You see something and you start to think deep in your consciousness that is the right way to treat people. Your father doesn’t sound like a very nice man and it’s a wonder that your mother put up with it all these years.”
I don’t know when it happened, but this dislike that I had for him and now turned into something of a heat that couldn’t be controlled. I reached up and took off his cowboy hat, putting it on myself and taking the role of the man. I straddled his waist, unbuttoned his shirt one at a time and made a point to do it slowly to make him watch me with his eyes.
“Brenda, you make me feel like I’m a criminal and that I should look back at my actions. I take a more careful eye at my actions toward women and I get a brief inkling that there’s a reason why I haven’t been able to land anybody permanently. I really convinced myself that it was them, but I think it was the way that I treated them that made them run for the hills. My father is a bastard and he uses his words and then his fists to get his point across. I thought that I was above that, but I’ve been slowly becoming him and didn’t even know it. Grabbing you by the wrist and having you call me on it forced me to take a hard look at myself.” I was tracing my fingers down around his nipples. He began to shiver to the sensation that I was causing him.
“It’s not too late to change and you’ve proven that beyond a shadow of a doubt.” I felt a little wanton and having this blond hair had given me the license to act out more playfully and seductively than I had ever done before. “I think that I want to show you the real man underneath all of that animosity. Deep down, you are a good man and you just needed somebody to take you by the hand and lead you into the light.” I pulled the straps of that red dress down over my upturned breasts and his eyes went wide with seeing me in that way in the moonlight.
“I don’t know why you even think that I am worthy of giving your body to. I’m not going to mince words and I find you very attractive and would love the opportunity to have sex with you. I want to make beautiful love and to make you smile and then moan in obvious enjoyment.” He had me by the hips and the dress was down over my waist. My panties were rubbing up against his engorged member and he was making a point to thrust up to make even better contact. “I think that I could get used to a woman like you in my life. I can even help you with your humanitarian causes. I will do my part and throw a sizable amount of money in your direction, but I think that you will go a long way with putting your own fundraisers together.” I had never thought of that, but the idea was appealing.
I moved up, leaving a trail of wetness along his stomach and up to his chin. I hovered over him with my legs taking the strain of holding myself in that way. “I think that we should see if we can’t put your mouth to better use than talking.” I pulled the panties to the side, sopping wet and already tripping on to his overeager lips. That was just a brief taste, but it was enough to make him thirst for more. He showed that by putting his fingers to work by opening me up to an oral exploration with his tongue. I was splayed open and it was a wonder that I was even able to stay in this position with the constant electricity that was now running through my veins.
“I think that you taste better than caviar, Brenda.” He was a flatterer, but he was also caring and kind. I had to dig deeper find him, but he was there. “Fuck…you’re dripping all over the place. I’ve never had a woman this excited to be with me and most often than not they are just there to further their own agenda.” I let him sink deep into me with his tongue and then I bounced on him like a pogo stick that had gone out of control.
“Fuck…fuck…yes…right there…don’t stop… Jesus Christ here it comes…here it comes…YESSSSS.” That orgasm was a mind lower and I had to plant my hands on either side of his head to keep myself from collapsing altogether. He slipped out from underneath me, bent me over at an angle and had me on my hands and knees in the sand. I felt him lifting my dress and then spanking my ass and making me yelp with surprise and excitement all rolled into one.
“I need this and you have no idea how much I have needed a woman like you in my life. My saddle is built for two and I want you to be a part of the kind a man that you have made possible. A lot of what I felt toward women has been washed away and I don’t see them, as arm candy. I see you, as the kind of woman that can keep me on a short leash. I need that, but what I need the most is a woman that shows me the kind of loving that I’m deserved. I didn’t think that I was deserving, but you opened my eyes to the possibility of true love.” That outer façade had now melted away and showed me that I had every right to pursue a relationship with a man that used to show nothing, but discontent.
“Take me…don’t think about it and just do it.” I was begging him and I think that he was eager to comply. He pressed that bulbous knob up against my lips and that first inch was buried deep, before my inner muscles began to work him over into a frenzy. I pulled him in the wake of my desire and we were now joined at the hips. He started to fuck me a little faster and I had to reach back to place my hand on his chest to slow down his role. “Don’t be in such a hurry and this is not a race… It’s a marathon.” I had problems in the past with men that were a little too anxious to get it over with. I found that a little direction goes a long way.
“Brenda, whatever you want is what you’re going to get.” It was agonizing, but he was very gentle and very manly and knew exactly how to press my buttons. In that regard, he had reached around and had done something that no other lover that I’ve been with in the past had ever tried. He played with my clit, as he gave me long hard strokes without stopping it in between for a much needed breather.
The feeling of him behind me was enough to keep me on the edge. He was driving with precision and he was touching on the spot in my body that had been unsatisfied. The size of his equipment was perfect to barely graze that area, but it was more than enough to make writhe in his grasp. I was gripping the sand with both hands, slapping at it with my palms. I could feel spittle coming out the corner of my mouth.
“I never really concerned myself with a woman’s pleasure, but this time it’s going to be different.” I could feel that he was losing that battle, but he was forcing himself to hold himself back. He wanted me to reach that moment first and then he would join me. I was happy to see that he had a lot more willpower and stamina than most.
“I want you, I need you and I think that I love you.” I had a lot of secrets that I kept in a vault inside my head and I was tempted to tell him each and every one of them. Had he asked at the moment of my climax, I probably would have told him anything he wanted to know and then some.
I was cumming hard and fast and my juices were now streaming down his shaft. The lips were holding him like a newborn baby, squeezing the life out of him. The cream in the center was what I was looking for and I heard his outcries and pleasure, which was followed by a torrent of love juice that soaked my insides.
I felt a little taken out of my comfort zone, as he turned me on my back and continued to fuck me through his orgasm. He had unloaded what felt like a gallon, but he continued to move against me with a determination that I could see in his eyes. He was breathing heavy and he looked like he was going to meet his maker. His face was red and his body was covered in a sheen of sweat.
“I can’t believe this…and I think I’m going to… AHHHHH.” This was the first time that I had seen a man have a multiple climax. It gave me a giddy little thrill that I was responsible for that. There wasn’t a whole lot left in the chamber, but the sensation was enough to make him collapse on top of me in absolute exhaustion.
“I don’t even know how to express to you my feelings, Brenda. I’ve never done that before, not even in my youth a
nd I think I know what I’ve been missing.” I went down on him, licking up the last of his discharge. His cock was sensitive and he trembled to the touch, but he did not try to push me away. He allowed me to take my pleasure.
One of those influential donations came back to haunt me, but he was able to convince them with an extra influx of cash that they should look the other way. I did go on to put on my own fundraisers with great success. I was now moving with those that had power and I had the confidence to stand up and be noticed, because of Paul. He was my cowboy lover and friend and everything that I wanted and more.
THE END
Ordered by a Cowboy Billionaire
Chapter one
I sit here on the train and I feel like my life is not my own. I have on a black dress, as I feel that I’m mourning the loss of one life in place of another. I grieve for the woman that I was supposed to be and I know that that woman has now been buried 6 feet under for all eternity. I want to scream, but I have no idea who will listen or even give a damn about my feelings. My father certainly didn’t care and I had gotten myself in this, because I felt like I had an obligation to my family. I was an only child and my mother was dead at childbirth, leaving my father to raise me on his own.
I’m not saying that he wasn’t a good provider, but he was a bit domineering and he expected me to take the place of the woman in the household. I didn’t know any better and I cooked and I cleaned and made sure that his house was made up properly for guests and anybody else that was going to come calling. I knew my place, but I felt that there was room for me to escape after I reached a certain age. I just turned 18 and I was contemplating taking my show on the road. I wanted nothing more to do with my father and then he came to me with this ill advised plan that made me almost sick to my stomach.
I remembered the day that he approached me, coming into the kitchen and sitting down at the table with an angst expression on his face. “Nicole, I’m afraid that I have some distressing news. Our crops have been dying, as a result of this heat wave. We don’t have enough money to keep a roof over our head and food in our bellies. I want you to know that I’ve been over this from every angle and I’ve come to a painful conclusion.” I sat down with him, holding his hand and making him give me eye contact.
Possessed By The Duke (Regency Romance) Page 49