by Seven Steps
Uh oh.
Ivan grabbed her hand again and yanked her forward just as the first of the laser fire exploded around them.
There were only two more doors to pass before they reached the wall.
What is he doing?
Ivan veered left, yanked open the left side door, pulled Sorcha through it, and slammed it shut. They ran through an unfurnished, open space, toward a door outlined in white light.
Behind them, the door was being shredded by agent fire.
Ivan and Sorcha crossed the room, and Ivan pulled open the final door.
He stopped short, looking at the wrong end of an agent’s laser gun.
“End of the road,” the agent said. “You’re coming with me.”
And then, the agent was gone, the sides of his body exploding.
Ivan and Sorcha looked at each other, then out the door. It took a moment for their eyes to adjust to the brilliant sunlight, but, across the small, flat, glass expanse, to their far left, stood Taklin. Smoke rose from his laser gun. His angelic white robes were smeared in blood.
“Hurry,” he commanded.
Five more agents’ bodies littered the ground.
Did Taklin do all of this?
“Get in the ship,” Taklin said. “There is a scientist, Washbert. Find him. He will be the key to Mega-Corp’s undoing. If you need help, find a man named Roan on planet Kip. He is a jumper, like you.” His eyes swung to Sorcha, and she wondered who the man was. So stoic and bitter and, yet, he was helping them.
I didn’t even think he liked us.
“Tell Roan what happened here. He will help you find Washbert.”
Sorcha shivered. Yes; she knew who Roan was. She knew him very well. The last time she’d seen him, she’d been picking up the pieces of her broken heart and fleeing with them.
She groaned inside.
Why does it have to be Roan?
“Thank you, Taklin.” Ivan said. He held out his hand, and the man shook it. “I won’t forget you.”
“Nor I you, Ivan, son of Troy.”
Taklin knows Ivan’s father? But how? He’s never spoken more than ten words to us. Who is this man named Taklin?
But there was no time to think about it. Ivan pulled her to the ship, strapped in, and took off, leaving Eminence Nova 1, and the love lost there, far, far behind.
Chapter 5
Why would Leilu throw herself in front of Phineas’s gun?
The question haunted her until she couldn’t sit still. Not even the comfort of the carpet beneath her feet could quiet her spinning brain.
It doesn’t make sense. Leilu hated me. The last things we said to each other were ugly and hateful. Why would she sacrifice herself for me? Why would Leilu save me?
She unstrapped and stood, walking to the back of the ship. With her mind a mess, she did the only things that she knew would calm it. She cleaned. Starting in the bedroom, she picked up the clothes on the floor, remade the bed, and picked up the trash. With every piece that she put away, a thought in her brain organized itself. She didn’t know when she had picked up the mantra of a clean life is a clean mind. The earliest she remembered doing it was with her adoptive mother, Kari. They’d often clean together when Sin, Sorcha’s adoptive father, was away, the sounds of dishes being washed and floors being scrubbed filling in the frosty silence that often sat between them. Kari hated Sorcha for being there. For putting their family in constant danger of discovery by Phineas or one of his agents.
Sorcha hated that she had to be there at all. There were days where she wished she would have died with her family. On other days, she wanted the world to burn. It saddened her that she couldn’t remember what her family looked like. She shape of her mother’s face, or the feel of her father’s touch. It was all gone. Lost in the void of time.
Sorcha swept faster. The whoosh of the old yellow handled broom soothed her some, though the movement hurt her arm like fire. Ivan had applied a special gel to close her wound and bandaged it to prevent infection, but it would take a while to heal.
I’m just glad I still have a shoulder at all.
Sweeping the last of the dust into a pile, she bent down and brushed it all into a yellow dust pan, which she dumped into a nearby metal pail. With the bedroom spotless, she moved on to the kitchen. The florescent light reflected off the gray metal cabinets, sink, and counters, forcing Sorcha to squint her eyes against it. She filled the small sink with water and soap and dipped in the two cups and bowls that her and Ivan had used for their last meal. He’d made some oatmeal on the stove. It was brown and flavorless, but it was nutritious. In space, that was all that mattered. Surviving, no matter how far from actually living it was.
Maybe we can get a decent meal on Kip, she thought. Visions of steak, potatoes, and green beans floated into her mind. Her favorite meal. Her mouth began to water at the thought. She could almost smell it. Then, her stomach growled, as if begging her to stop teasing it. After all, they only had one thing on the ship. Oatmeal. Barrels and barrels of oatmeal.
She finished scrubbing the dishes and wiping down the small counter top, relishing in the feel of the soap on the cloth and the act of scrubbing dirt off the metal bowls. She was almost surprised when she realized how calm her too busy mind had become. With the memories fading, and the guilt briefly retreating, she could focus on other things.
Like how silent Ivan was.
He hadn’t said a word since they arrived back on the ship. He’d simply set a course for planet Kip, cleaned the blood from her arm, and bandaged her up. He didn’t look at her while he worked, nor did he say any words of comfort or planning. It wasn’t like Ivan to not talk. He talked all the time.
Does he blame me for Leilu’s death? she wondered. She couldn’t blame him if he did. On some level, she blamed herself, too.
Exhaling, Sorcha walked to the front of the ship. Though she was closer to him now, she felt as if he were miles away.
She leaned one hip against the front console and looked into his eyes. They looked off into space, unseeing.
Is he thinking about his cousin? Is he blaming me? Is he blaming himself?
She put one hand on his arm, and he jumped. His eyes took on a bit more life then, and he looked at her.
He didn’t even know I was here? He’s worse off than I thought.
“I’m sorry about your cousin,” she said. “Though I don’t understand her actions, her bravery speaks volumes.”
“She died saving the man she loved.”
“Yeah, but the man she loved was Phineas Zorg.”
“Her heart didn’t care about that. It just knew that it had to keep its other half safe. But that doesn’t matter now. Nothing matters.”
She frowned and moved her fingers down his arm and covered his hand with hers.
“Don’t say that.”
“It’s true. With Leilu dead, Phineas has no reason to hold back. He’ll come for us with everything he has. Guns, agents, battleships. We don’t have a chance.”
She shook her head. “Don’t give up now, Ivan.”
“I’m not giving up. I’m speaking the truth.”
“You’re hurt.”
“I loved her!” he cried. “I loved her and I love you, and I don’t know whether to be happy that you’re alive or sad that she isn’t.”
His hands went through his dark curls. She could see his finger shake. He was barely keeping himself together.
“I just … I don’t know what to think.”
She felt tears well in her eyes, and, yet, he shed them. Though they were not close in age, he and Leilu were close in spirt. They were closer than cousins. They were friends.
Sorcha slid her body around his until she was in his lap. She pulled his heavy head to her, cradling it in her bosom as she shushed him and rocked him gently. She tried to give him all of the comfort that he’d given her through the years. To quiet his mind as he had quieted hers. She kissed his hair and whispered words of empathy and love. He wrapped his arms aroun
d her, pulling her close.
He exhaled his grief and sorry into her breast. Soaking her shirt and breaking her heart. She felt his pain. Tears dripped down her cheeks. Tears shed not for Leilu, but for Ivan’s love for her. She cried with him. Cried for her mother. For her father. For her sisters and brothers. She cried for Meghan, and the little boy with the green eyes. She cried for the Nadir, victims of Phineas Zorg’s genocide. But, most of all, she cried for Ivan. He was in pain, and she would have done anything to take it away.
Anything.
When his tears had run dry, and her body grew sore from being wrapped around his so tightly, she stood and took his hand. His red rimmed eyes looked so round and forlorn that she felt the tears well up again. Before they could fall, she led him to their special place. A patch of carpet next to the bedroom. It was slightly inclined and, from there, they could see out of the window. The star soaked universe zoomed past them in white streaks. There would be no star gazing tonight. But there could be comfort. There could be love.
She let go of his hand, grabbed a blanket from the bedroom, and reappeared. He looked so depressed that she had to swallow down the anguish that ate at her heart. She took his hand again and pulled him down to the carpeted floor, worn down from all of the hours they’d spent staring at the stars. When they were seated, she covered them both with the blanket, then turned her back to him. His arms fell around her, fitting her to him. His lips kissed her shoulder, and she closed her eyes.
She heard his breath even out. He’d fallen asleep. A moment later, she did, too.
Chapter 6
Most people would not call Kip a planet at all. It was more of a rock—one no bigger than the state of Texas—that had broken off from a planet and took up its own orbit. Still, the inhabitants were friendly, and a valuable commodity in the universe. The planet had a vein of diamonds that ran through it, thanks to its underground volcanos. Diamonds that had been mined for years and never seemed to exhaust. Pure, sparkling diamonds that the rich and powerful clamored for. And so, Kip was called a planet, and its inhabitants, the Kippens, worked the ground like happy dwarfs in a fairy tale.
Sorcha examined the icy planet as they approached. Like the others, the bottom side of the planet was brown. The Nadir side.
Did Phineas Zorg mine this planet? Are the Nadir already dead?
Sorcha swallowed. The next time she saw Phineas, she was sure that only one of them would walk away alive. She hoped it was her.
“I hope Taklin’s okay,” Ivan said, steering the ship toward the large tubes that protruded from the planet. “We should have taken him with us.”
He navigated through the long, lit tubes, past the atmosphere and frozen clouds, and into the heart of the planet. The people settled well below ground. Near the core. It was the only way for them to find warmth and be close to the mines.
“Taklin seemed to be doing fine on his own. Besides, we don’t know if we could trust him.”
“He saved our lives. Why wouldn’t we trust him?”
Sorcha shrugged, not wanting to compare Taklin to his cousin or speak badly of the dead. Not when it was someone that Ivan loved so much.
He laughed shortly, reading her thoughts. He seemed to do that a lot. “She died saving your life and you still don’t trust her.”
Sorcha shrugged. “She didn’t even like me. Why would she save me?”
Ivan shook his head. “She was right about you, you know. Everything is so black and white. Good and bad. There’s no gray.”
She didn’t know if she should feel bad or not about his comment, so she just shrugged again.
“It didn’t matter if Leilu liked you or not. Don’t you understand? The point was she saved you because she had to. That bomb in your head … the fact that I put it there. If she let Phineas catch us, he would have used us to make more bombs. Bombs that can blow up entire planets and every dimension upon them. And then, when he was out of dimensions to blow up or mine, he’d use you to find more of them. Phineas would rule the universe unopposed and we would be lost. She had to save you.”
“What does she care if Phineas blows up everything? It would just mean that she would be richer.”
“No, Sorcha. It would mean that she couldn’t save him anymore. And that would have destroyed her more than weapons ever could.”
He blinked away a tear that threatened to fall from his eye and turned back to the window.
Is that why Leilu saved me? Because she still thought that she could save Phineas? That one day her love would turn him around and he would shut down his evil corporation? That he would stop the murdering and the killing and be a regular husband and father? She shook her head. If Leilu thought that Phineas would choose her over his money, then she was more deluded than I thought.
“There’s something else, too,” Ivan said, wiping his nose on his sleeve. He turned fully to her now, his eyes blazing with accusation. “Back at the house, I asked you if you trusted me, but you didn’t respond.”
She knew that look. He was about to say something that she did not like. She shrugged and looked around the ship again, not meeting his eye. Her stomach did a little flip and she could feel her anger building, mixing with confusion and sadness.
“So that’s it then? You shrug and you look away? Is that what you do now, Sorcha? You can throw yourself into danger and take on agents with one arm, but you can’t look me in the eyes and tell me that you don’t trust me? That you thought I was leading you to your death?”
The words pierced her heart, like small grenades going off inside her. She grounded her teeth and stood up, walking across the room. She wanted to trust him, but she didn't know how. It made her heart ache that she couldn't give herself to him completely. If only she knew the way to bring down her walls for him. But the walls were high and thick, constantly changing and rebuilding themselves. Every time he'd break through one, another appeared, bigger and stronger.
He followed her.
“Sorcha, it’s a small ship. There is no place for you to go. Turn around and talk to me.”
She didn’t want to talk. Not about that. She didn’t know what it meant that she didn’t trust his judgement when they were in a pinch. She loved him. That didn’t change. She loved him more than she thought was possible. But to trust him with her life? It seemed out of her reach, going against everything within her.
“I have known you for three years,” he said, “and, sometimes, I feel like I am still trying to get my foot in the door with you. There are places in your heart that you won’t allow me to touch, and it shatters me every day. When will you learn to trust me?”
Sorcha whipped around. “I do trust you.” The vehement way her mind screamed to her that she was lying startled her.
Ivan didn’t buy into her lie either.
“How can I believe you, Sorcha, when time after time, you leave me out of the major decisions you make.”
“What decisions?”
“You fired on those agents without warning when I was pulling us to safety. Sorcha, we talked about this.”
“They were going to kill us.”
“It’s not the point. It’s the fact that I was doing something and, instead of following my lead, you went off on your own.”
“Follow your lead? Is that what I’m doing now? Following your lead?”
“No. Don’t twist my words. That’s not what I meant. This is a partnership. You and I are partners. If you are going to rush into danger, then fine, but at least tell me first. There might be a better way than to try to get yourself killed.”
“It’s a little hard to warn you that I am going to shoot someone, but I’ll try next time.”
“That’s not the point. The point is that you are acting as if you are alone, and you are not. I am with you.”
She knew that he was talking out of hurt. That he was grieving for his cousin. That he was feeling out of control and so he was doing everything he could to control the things around him. She wanted to bite her tongue and b
e empathetic as he tried to deal with his life.
She failed.
“Do you want me to apologize to your ego for trying to protect you? Because I won’t. Stop with the whoa is me act, Ivan. You are the same person who dropped me off on a distant planet with man repellant on my body and a bomb in my head. Don’t sit back and cry about how we’re not a partnership.”
“Fine, Sorcha. Turn this around on me. That’s what you do best. You know, sometimes I wonder…” He stopped and waved his comment away. He turned and walked back to the console.
Sorcha’s temper went into orbit.
“Wonder what, Ivan? Why you stay with me? Is that what you are trying to say?”
The hurt that speared through her words surprised her. She always knew that day would come. After all, she’d lost everyone else she loved in her life. Why not Ivan, too?
Ivan turned, his smile sad.
“No, Sorcha. I wonder why you stay with me.”
Sorcha couldn’t move. Couldn’t breathe. Her heart fell into her toes, shattering into a million pieces on the way down. A sorrow she’d never known before gripped her spirit.
Was that what he thought? That she would leave him because she didn’t trust him? The idea was ridiculous. She loved Ivan. Why would she leave?
Her brain and her heart seemed to scream at her at the same time.
Because you don’t trust him.
Anguish rooted her in place as he grabbed a satchel and filled it with supplies. A canister of oatmeal. Touch screens. Some cash. A laser gun, and a knife. He slung the army green bag behind his back and pressed the door release button. He stood there, with his hands on his hips, waiting for her, his face looking out into the darkness that was Kip. All around them were the rocky walls of deep caves. Firelight in stone cauldrons stood at ten foot intervals along the walls, their light dancing along the mossy rocks. The smell of mold and rot permeated the air, making Sorcha gag. She moved her tongue against the top of her mouth, trying to dislodge the awful taste that settled there.