Justin wiped the moisture from his face with an open palm. “Why do you have to make things so hard?”
Hale took a moment to adjust himself in his jeans. “I know it’s entirely inappropriate in this situation, but it can’t be helped. You have that effect on me.”
Justin actually cracked a smile, letting loose a small burst of air that may have been half a laugh. “Yeah, well, feeling’s mutual,” he said, taking a second to give his own jeans a yank at the zipper. The smile faded to nothing. “But that’s not what I meant.”
Hale wanted to growl. He had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach. He’d done his best to play off the signs, but now it was obvious something was up. But best not to jump to conclusions. He’d hear the kid out. And yes, dammit—if Justin tried to pull some childish shit now, he was “the kid.”
Justin glanced around nervously. “Do you have time for a walk?”
“Of course,” Hale said. “I don’t know why I came so early. I guess… it was a slim chance, but I was really hoping to see you.” Justin looked like Hale had punched him.
No. Fucking. Way. If this started going in the wrong direction, Hale wouldn’t take it. He’d grab the dumb boy and tie him up if he had to. Take him in the right direction. To his bed. In Chicago. Until he saw reason.
They began walking away from the warehouse. Getting jumped was the least of Hale’s worries right now, but it didn’t seem safe to wander in the dark out here. Justin was a bit aimless, so Hale walked toward the cover of an adjacent factory. Even now he was protecting the kid. Seemed like Justin mostly needed protecting from himself.
Frowning, Justin looked like he was having a difficult time beginning whatever he had to say. Outwardly, Hale forced patience, but inside he was having a hard time keeping down the panic. He clenched his fists and rubbed his thumbs against the knuckles of his index finger. This really did look bad.
Several minutes passed. They neared the next building, and Justin still wasn’t talking. Dammit. Hale couldn’t take this anymore.
It was time he beat Justin to the punch.
“This is far enough,” he told Justin and grabbed his hand. Justin looked shocked but let himself be pulled to the building’s wall where Hale dragged him down. “Whatever you’re afraid of, we should be okay here, at least for a while. But before you say anything, I want to let you know, I’m not going anywhere. I’ll jump through whatever hoops you need me to jump through like a trained mutt, at least for a while. But if you even think of cutting me loose, I swear to God I will park myself outside your door and howl at the moon until you let me in. I mean that literally. I know where you live now.”
“What? How?”
“I followed you after work, dumbass. Having me parked outside your place is not going to be very discreet.”
“Hale!” Justin was getting angry. Good. Justin tried to pull his hand away, but Hale wouldn’t let it go.
“Hale, I can’t—”
Hale covered Justin’s mouth with his free hand to keep him from finishing the sentence. He pushed into him and forced him back onto the gravel, which couldn’t be too comfortable. Especially not when Hale lay out on top of him. “Don’t say another word, Justin. Don’t screw this up. I know you feel something for me. I know it. I know you’re scared. So whatever is going through your mind, you’re going to tell me. You’re going to tell me everything. And then I’m going to help you fix it. Enough of this no-talking shit.” Hale’s blood was boiling. The instinct to attack, to force, to take, turned into a threat: “I beat you once, and I can do it again.”
Justin kneed him in the balls. “Get the fuck off me!”
All the air left Hale’s body. He rolled to the side, cupping himself, as though that would somehow quell the pain.
Justin bellowed. “How do you even know what I was going to say? You overbearing asshole!” Justin swiped his hand on the gravel, showering Hale with stones. It actually felt good in comparison with the nauseating pain emanating from between his legs up into his gut.
“Tell me I’m wrong,” Hale croaked. “Please tell me I’m wrong, and I’ll do anything to make it up to you.”
He glanced up at Justin, who was on the ground but sitting up, a frown on his face.
Justin exhaled deeply. “I can’t tell you you’re wrong, because you weren’t. But now… I just don’t know.”
Ouch. But wait. “Weren’t, past tense?” he asked Justin. “You changed your mind, you mean.” Hale put on his most pitiful face. It wasn’t difficult. He also kept his hands on his balls even though the rough edges were coming off his pain. Yeah, he was milking it.
“You’re a tenacious, stubborn bastard, you know that?” Justin asked, glaring down at him.
“Yup.”
“I’m sorry I kneed you in the balls. That was pretty low.” Justin scooted over to Hale and helped him sit up.
“That’s okay. I’m a tenacious, stubborn bastard, and I deserved it.” Hale groaned and decided to use his advantage. He plopped his head down in Justin’s lap.
Justin snorted. “You just don’t stop.”
“Never will,” Hale agreed. So say the words, Justin. Tell me you’ll stay. But the plea never left Hale’s lips. He’d made his point. Still, his heart felt a little bit broken, like it needed a Band-Aid or something. The kid had been trying to bolt on him. Leave him.
That hurt.
Justin put a hand on Hale’s forehead, the glare turning into more of a gaze as he looked down at Hale. His fingers absently began running through Hale’s hair. Justin’s other hand fell on Hale’s chest. And suddenly, Hale was okay. He wasn’t feeling pain. Justin’s hands felt amazing. Getting kneed in the balls was almost worth it.
“You win. I’ll tell you everything.” Justin’s eyes were dark as he turned them from Hale’s face to gaze off into the distance. “I was trying to protect you, but it’s clear to me now you’d just end up killing yourself with your own brand of crazy, because you won’t fucking give up.” Hale brought his hands up and placed them over Justin’s hand on his chest. Even when they were getting each other off in the forest, things hadn’t been this intimate.
“Talk,” Hale demanded softly.
Justin took a breath and began. He spoke quickly, as though the words were escaping his mouth and running for freedom. “My friend Griz, I’m pretty sure he was killed because he’s been helping me in Shadow Fray. I’m pretty sure he’s the one who got us together with that note, and if he wasn’t, it’s too much of a coincidence that you and I met, and practically the next day he died. His death was no accident, and I’ve seen shady characters around him before. He had to leave Milwaukee a long time ago. Coming back here was a risk for him, a risk he undertook mainly for me. So something is up. I don’t want anyone else to die, because if they do it’ll be my fault. Also I got a new Fray last night.”
Hale’s mind was swirling. “But… wait. Jesus Christ. Slow down. I feel like you said fifty things in the span of fifteen seconds.” Done on purpose, no doubt. Why was Justin being so damned aggravating?
“See?” Justin said, lifting his hands up in a shrug to the sky, now barely beginning to lighten. “I’m never talking again. It doesn’t work.”
Oh, if that didn’t piss Hale off. He sat up, swiveled around behind Justin, and put his arms around him. He forced calm. “I take it back,” Hale said. “I’ll take any talking I can get. You did good. Just let me think a second.”
Justin was tense in his arms, but in a few moments, he started to relax. Hale was seeing a pattern here. The kid was like a scared animal that needed petting. Justin’s voice was more conciliatory when he spoke again. “Maybe I’m pushing you away. Maybe I’m trying to piss you off,” he admitted.
“Well, it’s not working,” Hale lied. Justin leaned back into him, and the lie became a little bit smaller. He kissed Justin on the temple near his hair. There—take that. A kiss as a weapon.
Justin breathed deeply in his arms. “At least it’s all out now,” he said.
>
“Give me some time to think about this,” Hale offered after a pause. “Let me talk to Benz, see what he has to say. But this isn’t your fault. You didn’t kill your friend, Justin.”
“But what do we do? What if we aren’t supposed to be together?”
“You mean, what if certain people don’t want us to be together?” Hale paused. What would they do? He didn’t have an answer, not yet. “I don’t know, but I do know this. You and I fight—that’s what we do. We fight. And not just in the Fray. We fight for what’s important.”
Hale felt Justin nod against his shoulder. “Okay,” Justin said, seeming to come to agreement. “We fight.”
One more battle won, then. At least for now, but there were more to come. Hale held Justin tightly and he didn’t let go. Not for a long time.
HALE WATCHED Eddie sleeping. She was twitching in that restless sleep kids sometimes have when they first nod off. Cute. If only he could sit and watch her sleep longer, but he had things to discuss with Benz. Setting the reading tablet next to the bed, he slid his arm out from under her. Trickier than an escape from a hold in a Fray, but she didn’t stir.
Benz was waiting for him in the living room. Thankfully, Jess had made herself scarce after a late dinner. They were alone.
Benz took up two-thirds of the couch, sprawled out in a way that was both relaxed and imposing. Hale had the sudden urge to laugh, maybe because things looked so bleak. He’d been unable to come up with any solutions on his own. He had nothing except information to bring to this conversation.
“Why do I have a bad feeling about this?” Benz asked as Hale sat down. Hale angled toward him, taking up as little space as possible and sitting forward with his arms on his knees.
“Because you’re either smart or psychic, and psychic is really the only option with you.”
“Funny guy. What’s up?”
“Seems Justin’s friend who died was involved with Shadow Fray in some way. Justin thinks his friend was the one who got the note in my pocket, and someone killed him for it.”
Benz appeared to mull it over for a moment. “Interesting theory. What do you think?”
“I never heard of the guy, so I have no clue,” Hale answered. “But it sounds plausible.”
“Who’s his friend?”
“Gristopher Mays.”
“Never heard of him.”
“Who’s your friend? Could she have done it?”
“Killed him?” Benz asked, confused.
“No. Given me the note.”
Benz shrugged. “I’d say it’s more likely this Mays guy. But why would he do that?”
“Because I’m smart and you’re nice,” Hale answered glibly.
Benz didn’t respond. His facial expression didn’t change.
So much for levity. “I’m guessing,” Hale began slowly, “it’s because he wanted Justin out from under this Scarecrow guy, and like I said, I’m a smart fighter and you’re a nice handler. See? I wasn’t joking.”
Benz rolled his eyes, which struck Hale as comical considering he was a giant in a suit. “Seems rather roundabout, like a lot of trouble to go through for a handler,” Benz said.
“Maybe, but consider what happened to Scarecrow’s last Brawler.”
Benz grunted. “True enough.”
“So here’s the thing. What if Justin is right and this was some kind of warning? What if this happened because we’re breaking the rules?”
“Breaking the rules is an understatement for what you’re doing.”
“I’m not denying that. It’s got me so paranoid I searched the condom truck from top to bottom. I didn’t find any bugs, but it’s a big truck.”
“Bugs I can help you with. I’ll get you a device from the club. Light blinks real fast by a mic and gets real bright near a camera. Should give you some peace of mind.”
“It would. And Justin too.” Hale took a deep breath and studied Benz’s face. “What do I do about Justin?”
Benz leaned forward, steepling his hands. Hale waited quietly.
“I think,” Benz said, “you need to be careful. But I also think they can’t touch you—or him—at least not right now. After the numbers on that last Fray, you’re more popular than ever, worth too much. You can’t keep working that truck job, though. If you’re right about this killing being a message, then that job is rubbing the killer’s face in it. Quit the job and it’ll look like you’re backing off.”
Hale raised an eyebrow at Benz. “Just quit the job? That’s it?”
Benz looked confused. “What do you mean?”
“I mean you’re not going to tell me to stay away from him?”
Benz cracked a smile at Hale. “No, I’m not going to tell you that. I can’t say I’m not worried, but I’m not blind. I can see this guy means something to you.”
“You’re right.” Hale hadn’t planned this moment, hadn’t even thought about it much, but now that it presented itself, he decided to get it out. “But I gotta be honest—the kind of relationship I’m looking for with him—he’s not just a friend and training partner.” Hale paused, gathering himself. He wasn’t scared exactly, but he was surprised by how difficult this was. Better to get it done with—and quickly. He shifted his gaze to the side, not looking Benz in the eyes, unwilling to pause or be dissuaded by what he might see there. “He’s more than a friend. I was ridiculous today. With all this shit going on, the kid was gonna back off. I felt like he was gonna rip my heart out. But I convinced him to stay with me, at least for now. I wanna be with him. Need to be with him.” That was plain enough, right? He turned his eyes back to Benz.
“Like I said, Hale. I’m not blind.” Benz’s calmness was hard to read. Had he not understood?
“And you’re okay with it? With me… kind of bent?” He went with the slur, just throwing it all out there.
Benz paused dramatically, his mouth dropping open. His expression was no longer difficult to read, his words angrily slow and precise. “Fuck you for even asking.” Wow. Benz didn’t cuss.
“Sorry, but… most people would have a problem with it. I didn’t think you would, just making sure I guess.”
“I’m not most people,” Benz said, gentling his expression. The big man sighed, sitting up straight. “For the record, I’ve killed men. It doesn’t sit well with me. It was wrong. Seeing my brother happy? It’s the opposite of everything that’s wrong. Screw everyone else and what they might say. I got your back on this.”
“What about Jess?”
Benz laughed. “Man, now I know you got it bad if you want to bring her into this. I love her for a reason. She’ll be fine with this. Edna too. We take care of our own.”
“You serious?” Hale asked. “You think she’ll be fine with this? I was married to her little sister. I wasn’t the best husband. And you think she’ll be okay with me moving on for the first time since Janie died… with a man?”
Benz laughed again. “Well, when you put it like that—”
“I’m glad you find this so amusing.”
“A lot more amusing than your sad attempts at humor, yes. Don’t worry. When it gets down to it, we’re family. You let us raise your daughter as our own. That holds more weight to your character than anything else you’ve ever done. If Jess is a little angry with you at first, well, that’s normal, isn’t it?”
“You’re right. That is her normal.”
“I’ll talk to her about it. You’ll see.”
Hale shook his head skeptically. “If you say so.”
“Seriously? With everything else you have going on, you’re worried about what Jess thinks?”
“Dude, I’m kinda scared of your wife.”
Benz laughed again. For such a big guy, you’d expect he’d have a big laugh, but it was surprisingly normal. Maybe the constriction of his suits kept him from bellowing out. Hale couldn’t help but smile himself.
“I’m glad you got my back, Benz.”
“Always, brother.” They bumped fists, but then Ben
z brought him in for a hug. Damn, but Hale was lucky to have him. It was almost cute the way the big guy liked his hugs. And Hale had to admit, he liked them too.
Releasing Benz, the seriousness of the situation set in.
“What about Justin?” Hale asked. “We gotta get him over to our team. If this friend of his was murdered….” Hale shook his head. How did you justify something you knew in your gut? “I feel like it’s more important than ever.”
Benz nodded, brow furrowed. “I wish I knew how.”
“You don’t have any contact with the bosses—the Shadow Masters?”
“Communication is strictly one way, and even if I could, I’m not sure it would be wise. Best to let things die down a little.”
“So what do we do?”
“I don’t have any bright ideas yet. We watch the situation closely. If we have to get drastic, we can, but no need to jump the gun. We watch and wait, and maybe an opportunity presents itself.”
“That’s the best you got?” Hale asked. He didn’t want to wait on this, consequences be damned.
Benz read his tone well. “Waiting sucks, I know, but we need more info. Let’s just see how things go at his next Fray.”
“That’s in two weeks.”
“Just two weeks,” said Benz, trying to sound comforting, “then we reevaluate.”
So that was it, then. Hale steadied himself with a deep breath before moving on. “I take it no word on our next Fray?”
“None.” Hale figured as much, but it was only a matter of time.
In that moment, Hale solidified a thought and turned it into a promise. He would find a way to be at Justin’s next Fray, wherever the Arena might be. Benz would be pissed, but Hale had two weeks to tell him. It was dangerous and stupid, but he had to be there—for many reasons. Not the least of which was the fact that Hale was far more concerned about Justin’s next Shadow Fray than he was his own.
Chapter 23
THE TRAIN wasn’t moving fast enough. Justin looked out the window, trying to still his thoughts, but he didn’t like being a passenger. He’d much rather be in the driver’s seat.
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