I want to say she chose Lucas because of his fine house and healthy bank balance but that would be a lie. You only had to see them together to know what they meant to each other. And that knowledge hurt like a sharp thorn in my side, which rubbed and pricked through my entire life.
I can almost hear your accusation, Violet. ‘But what about my grandmother?’ you ask.
All I can tell you was that she was a good and fine woman who loved you and your sister. I cared for her and that’s the truth but I could never let Isabella go. I tried to be a good husband but deep down I was wracked with guilt because I just didn’t love her the way I should have.
I hope you can forgive me. When you told me about the pregnancy, my hatred for the McKellans overwhelmed me. It was another example of them destroying our family.
I should have supported you and, to my never-ending shame, I didn’t. My pride, hate and guilt were all-consuming and destructive. I should have turned from it but I didn’t.
I blamed the McKellans for destroying my family but I’ve had years to reflect and come to the realisation that it was all my own doing.
I should never have chased you or your sister away.
I can understand if you don’t want to but I hope you keep the house.
There’s always a Beckett in Violet Falls, and that Beckett should be you.
Yours, Grandad
Violet sat down on her desk with a bump and re-read the letter before folding it up again and putting it back in the envelope. After slipping it into the top drawer of her desk, she felt lighter and years of a tension she hadn’t even realised she was carrying, seemed to melt away.
She sat still for a few minutes, the soft tick of the wall clock marking off the seconds.
‘You cheated yourself out of a family. It was your loss, but I’m sorry for it,’ Violet said softly as she stood up and walked towards the door. ‘I forgive you.’
Violet’s eyes widened with surprise when she opened the door later that day. She’d taken a break from the wedding to catch up on emails and organise the logistics of a fortieth wedding anniversary at the Botanic Gardens. She couldn’t wait till Jason’s wedding was over and she could turn her attention to other events.
‘Jason, what are you doing here?’
‘Can I come in please,’ he said, looking uneasy. ‘I need to speak to you for a minute. I promise it won’t take very long.’
Violet’s stomach lurched, wondering if Celine had said anything to him since their conversation. Something was very wrong, she could sense it.
‘Well, if it’s important I guess you better come this way,’ said Violet, gesturing for him to follow her into the office.
‘I like what you’ve done with the place, Violet. It looks good—welcoming.’
‘Thanks, it was definitely time for a re-do. Nothing had been done to it in, like, sixty years,’ said Violet, sitting down at her desk and pointing to the opposite chair. ‘Please, sit down.’
She watched as he sat down, his hands fidgeting. He was clearly nervous.
‘So, what’s up, Jason?’
‘Um, Holly isn’t here is she?’
Violet shook her head. ‘No, she’s at school. Why?’
‘Oh, just wondering.’ His hands stilled as he placed them on his lap. ‘I’ve been thinking since the other day. You know, about you and me and Holly.’
A cold, prickling sensation ran between Violet’s shoulder blades and down her back.
‘I see . . .’
‘No, I don’t think you do, Violet. I was wrong all those years ago and I know I acted like a jerk. And . . .’
‘What?’
‘I want to be part of Holly’s life. I know I told you to have an abortion but since seeing her, knowing she’s mine—well hell, I don’t know,’ said Jason, fidgeting again. ‘I guess what I’m saying is I want to see her and get to know her.’
Violet sat stunned for a minute as she tried to wrap her head around what he was saying.
‘So, let me get this straight,’ said Violet, after taking a deep breath. ‘You want me to let you see Holly after you told me to get rid of my pregnancy. You didn’t want me, Jason, and you sure as hell didn’t want a baby. And now, after eight years, you think it’s okay to play daddy?’
‘Come on Violet, it’s not like—’
‘Yes it is,’ said Violet, interrupting him. ‘You’re not thinking about anyone except yourself. What a surprise.’
‘Violet, I have a right.’
‘Didn’t you waive that when you told me to have an abortion. As far as you were concerned I dealt with the problem. Wasn’t that what you called it?’
‘I admit I was wrong. Fuck, I was young and stupid and selfish. But things are different now.’
‘Are they? You weren’t there when I was working two jobs to try and support her, you didn’t nurse her through her first fever or pick her up each time she fell. You could have, I gave you that opportunity but you didn’t want it. Why should I let you now?’
‘That’s not fair. If I’d known—’
Violet stood up and walked over to the door. This meeting was over.
‘Marry Celine and just forget about me and my daughter. You two are perfect for each other and you can have your own kids.’
Jason stood up to leave. ‘Look, Violet, I do have some rights. I’m Holly’s father—I could ask for visitation rights, and maybe even part-custody.’
‘Custody?’ said Violet. ‘Do you know how disruptive it’d be for Holly to move to Melbourne again?’
‘Well, if not custody then visitation rights,’ said Jason, before walking out the front door.
Violet slammed the door shut and stood leaning against it, her forehead pressing against the hard wood. Her body shook and a wave of fear threatened to engulf her. Just when she and Holly were happy and settled and could envision a future in Violet Falls, Jason McKellan had come along talking about visitation rights.
‘Look, I’ve had a lot on my mind over the past few weeks,’ Jason said as he stared out the kitchen window.
‘All I’m saying is, if there’s a problem or if there’s anything you want to talk about, I’m here,’ said Mac leaning back in his chair.
‘Why would you even care?’ said Jason.
‘Because we’re McKellans and brothers and I’ve got your back.’
Jason let out a bitter-sounding laugh. ‘Yeah, since when?’
‘Since always.’
‘Nup, you’re playing at something. I haven’t got time for this. My head is spinning with work and the wedding and Celine’s stressed out of her brain,’ said Jason.
‘Well if you want to talk any time, just ask.’
Their eyes locked for a moment before Jason looked away, turmoil etched on his face. ‘No, I’m on a set path. I’ll marry Celine and go back to the city and get back to work,’ he said, before hesitating on his way to the door.
‘Actually I would like to know what’s going on between you and Violet.’
‘What?’ said Mac, frowning.
‘Are you and Violet together and is it serious?’
‘Well, I really want us to be together, and I know she cares for me, but there’s nothing fixed as yet. I’ve been busy with McKellan’s Run, she’s busy with work and Holly,’ said Mac, sensing there was something bad coming his way.
‘Then you should know I want to be part of Holly’s life. You might want to encourage Violet to let this happen. Holly is my daughter and though I did act like a jerk when Violet told me she was pregnant, now that I’ve met my daughter I want to be able to see her and have some sort of father-daughter relationship. I’ve told Violet this too,’ said Jason.
‘Jesus, did you threaten her?’
‘Of course not. It’s just that Holly is my daughter, no matter what happened between me and Violet, and I have a right to see her. There’s nothing wrong with that.’
‘How do you manage that with you in Melbourne and Violet here. And what if Violet refuses?’
&
nbsp; ‘Then I’ll have to resort to petitioning the courts.’
Mac uncrossed his arms and clenched them by his side. ‘Fuck it, Jason, you hurt her badly once and she’s never trusted a bloke since. And she’s done an amazing job bringing up Holly. Please just move on with your life and let everyone else move on with theirs.’
‘I can’t.’
‘Why not? You’ve got your career and Celine. Just leave Violet and Holly alone.’
Jason shook his head. ‘I hear what you’re saying but the thought of you having Violet and raising my daughter is too much. Holly’s mine, Mac, and I want to be the one she sees as her father,’ said Jason before leaving the room.
Mac stood open-mouthed and stared at the doorway. Anger surged through him and all he wanted to do was wring Jason’s bloody neck.
Chapter 24
Violet fell into Mac’s arms as soon as she opened the door.
‘It’s alright Violet, I’m not going to let anyone hurt you or Holly,’ said Mac, holding her close and feeling her trembling against him.
‘He says if I don’t tell Holly he’s her father and let him see her, he’s going to . . . He’s going to take us to court for visitation rights, or maybe even custody.’
‘It won’t come to that, I promise. Jason has always devoted all his attention to his career, and Celine is a handful. And I doubt she’ll want a stepdaughter sprung on her right after getting married. Give him a bit of time and everything will sort itself out,’ said Mac, rubbing her back.
‘He can’t take her away from me, Mac. I don’t know what I’d do if—’
‘He won’t, Violet. No one is taking Holly from you, okay?’
She peered up at him through tear-misted eyes and sniffed. ‘Okay.’
‘Come on, let’s get you calmed down. What time do you have to pick up Holly?’
Violet dashed a couple of tears away with the back of her hand. ‘In about half an hour. Which probably gives me just enough time to fix my mascara.’
‘Yeah, well I wasn’t going to say anything but I don’t think emo chick or gothic bride is really your look.’
‘Says you,’ said Violet, smiling through her tears.
‘Yeah, says me. Come on, go get ready and we can pick up Holly together. Why don’t I treat you both to pizza and ice cream tonight? The last thing you need is to have to cook.’
‘But there’s still so much to do. I mean, I should go through the—’
‘Not tonight, you don’t. Tonight it’s all about you, me and Holly. McKellan’s Run and the blasted wedding can wait.’
Violet squeezed him a bit tighter. ‘Thank you, Mac. You always know how to fix everything.’
It was almost midnight by the time Mac got back to McKellan’s Run, feeling sort of buzzed. He grinned as he pulled out his keys. He’d spent the evening with Violet and Holly and a warmth and a gentleness wrapped around his heart because tonight he’d felt like he was part of a family in a way he hadn’t since his Dad died and Sarah had moved into town. They’d eaten pizza and sat on Violet’s couch and watched Holly’s favourite movie. Holly made him smile as she sang along with all the songs while Violet held his hand on the couch all night. After Holly had gone to bed, he and Violet had watched an old movie. Halfway through the movie, Mac had thought, this is all I’ve ever wanted for so many years.
He turned the key in the front door and wandered into his dark house. For the first time ever, it felt cold and lonely. Mac headed into the kitchen to grab a drink before going to bed. He pulled open the refrigerator door and stood there checking out his options.
‘You’re late.’
Mac turned around to find Celine leaning against the doorway.
‘Yeah, just off to bed. Where’s Jason?’
‘He said he was taking off to his cottage for a while,’ Celine replied with a shrug.
‘You didn’t want to go with him?’
‘He said he wanted some time alone. Apparently he needed some time to think—about what, I have no idea. We’re meant to be focusing on our wedding and he’s running off to commune with nature.’
‘Ah,’ said Mac.
‘I suppose you’ve spent the evening with Violet?’
Mac grabbed a bottle of water and slammed the fridge door closed. ‘Yeah, I have. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a busy day tomorrow.’
‘Oh, I know how hard you work, Mac. You’re really dedicated—I admire that,’ said Celine.
Mac opened the bottle of water and looked away.
‘Oh well, someone has to keep the old place running.’
‘I suppose they do. You’re so dependable, aren’t you, Mac?’
‘Hmmm, well not sure about that. Besides there isn’t anyone else to run it,’ said Mac before chugging down some water. He wasn’t sure where the hell this conversation was going but he was beginning to feel uncomfortable.
‘Guys like you are pretty rare but I know your type. Family comes first and you’ll sacrifice everything for the ones you love,’ said Celine.
‘Well, that’s what it means to be a family . . . now if you’d excuse me.’
‘Oh, I understand. You see my dad is in bad financial trouble. He’s in the process of selling all his assets to try and save the family business—and even then there’s still a chance he’ll lose everything. I’d do anything to help him out.’
‘I’m sorry to hear that, Celine. I didn’t know,’ said Mac.
‘As you say, you have to protect your family,’ said Celine.
A chill shimmied down Mac’s spine. She was up to something but he wasn’t sure what.
‘What are you getting at, Celine?’ said Mac. He hated games, preferring people to just say what they mean.
‘I just wonder how you and Violet would feel if Jason and I sought complete custody of Holly?’
‘Given she’s a great mother and she’s brought her up by herself these past nearly eight years, it’s incredibly unlikely you’d get custody.’
‘Hmmm, but what would a judge think about her purposely keeping knowledge of the child from him?’
‘What the hell?’
‘Come on Mac, you have to agree that it’s a pretty awful thing to do—keeping a secret like that?’
‘You know as well as I do that Jason never wanted Holly.’
‘Perhaps. But something like that . . . I mean Jason’s best friend is one of Melbourne’s most successful family law lawyers.’
Mac felt a spark of anger ignite in the pit of his stomach. ‘How in God’s name could you take Holly away from Violet?’
She crossed her arms over her chest.
‘I want five hundred thousand dollars, otherwise I’ll encourage Jason to seek custody.’
Mac stilled and slowly lowered the bottle. ‘Excuse me?’
‘You heard. Pay up or I’ll encourage Jason to go for total custody.’
Mac felt as if he’d just been kicked in the guts.
‘As if you could.’
‘Oh, don’t doubt me, Mac. I’m more than capable.’
‘Celine, why would you do such a thing? Violet hasn’t done anything to you. How can you hate her that much?’
‘My father needs the money, it’s as simple as that. I don’t hate Violet or Holly but they’re a means to an end. Okay, I admit that the woman rubs me the wrong way and I can’t stand how everybody falls all over her but that’s beside the point. Unless you pay up, Violet and Holly will be, let’s say, collateral damage.’
‘And if I give you the money?’
‘I’ll discourage Jason from going for custody.’
‘Really, and what happens next time you’re strapped for cash?’
‘This is a one-off. My father needs a quick injection of cash and you have my word.’
Mac let out a hollow laugh. ‘Like I would ever trust you!’
‘You really don’t have a choice. That’s the offer and I’ll give you a couple of days to think about it. It all comes down to how much you care about Violet and Holly. And
if you’re willing to pay five hundred thousand dollars to protect her.’
Mac stomped into his bedroom.
‘What a bitch!’ he said as he dumped the bottle on the nightstand.
He opened the window and let the night breeze blow over his face. It was cold and clear but it didn’t abate his anger. Somewhere in the dark an owl hooted.
‘Hope you’re having a better night than I am, buddy.’
Mac stared out into the darkness. Five hundred thousand dollars was a hell of a lot of money. His mind raced as he tried to work out how he could come up with such an amount. McKellan’s Run was worth a tidy sum but nearly all the money Mac earned was poured back into the farm. There was always something to buy, fix or replace. Last season he’d been forced to buy a new tractor when the old one spectacularly blew up in the middle of slashing. He’d also replaced the roof on the old shed, bought two more water tanks, added a few more ewes to his flock and purchased a prize-winning ram for breeding. So even though the farm was rich in assets, Mac’s available funds were always a bit tight, well at least until the next wool cheque came in. And he’d hoped to do something about the old original cottage.
He sucked in a breath. Could Celine really be that conniving?
The only positive thing to come out of the whole ugly conversation was that he was pretty sure that Jason didn’t have anything to do with it. They had always had their differences and probably always would but at least Mac could find some comfort in knowing his brother was above blackmail.
He ran his hand through his hair and sighed. He could raise the money and he’d do it for Violet. However before he fronted up at the bank he needed to talk to Jason and probably his mum as well.
How he was going to broach the subject with his brother he had no idea. He could hardly walk up and slap him on the back and say, ‘Oh by the way, your fiancée is blackmailing me to the tune of five hundred thousand big ones.’
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