I look up to him and dare him to continue. Of course, he does. “It was such a beautiful day. You need to learn to watch the area around you. If you hadn’t been looking at her like that, you would’ve seen me coming.” He stands quickly, knowing my head is coming for his face. His words send my gut into a whirlwind of hatred as I watch him move a few steps around the room before he passes back by. Fire, get your ass in here and let me kill this piece of garbage.
It’s as if he could hear me. Within a few seconds, the doors are all busting open and fog fills the room while shots are flying everywhere. I drop to my side and begin to work my wrists free. Samantha crawls to me, and it’s only a short time before I can hear Jade yelling at one of the guys to lie the fuck down.
When the chaos in the room settles, I look around and see some of the extended team here to help next to Fire, who is like a raging animal, kicking open doors. Then there’s Ice looking like a mean bitch standing over two guys tied up on the ground below her.
What I don’t see is that asshole in white. Or Emmy.
“Where the fuck is Emmy?” I scream at Fire to get his attention, and he turns with fury to look at the front door. She’s not there, and the door stands open as if we all missed a tiny piece of this fucking puzzle in the middle of that storm.
I race to find her, only to be left with an empty yard of piles of shit against the house. I step into the open and see her around the corner with a white sleeve around her neck. His other arm holds a gun to her head.
My eyes search Emmy’s. She’s trying to be calm and collected. I know this is hard for one of us to go through, and she’s never had any practice in this sort of situation. My heart hurts watching her try to process each breath, knowing it very well may be her last.
“I found her. Would you like to watch me fuck her? I’ll let you, since you’re my friend.” I’m going to kill him. I’m going to fucking kill him. My mind tells me to proceed with caution, but my entire body says he needs to die, and if it means I go here today trying, then so fucking be it. But I won’t risk her life.
I don’t respond, because that’s what he wants me to do. If I feed in to his game, I’m only making it worse for her.
He runs his hands down her shirt, then under the material, and I watch her squirm with disgust. He’s put himself in a little grove, with crap all around him, so that no one can get to him from behind. I keep waiting for someone to come around the other side of the house, but they never do.
I take one step toward him. He stiffens up and presses the gun into her temple even harder. “You don’t move. I’ll shoot her without a fucking thought.” I stop moving and watch his face over hers. It’s better if I focus on my hatred of him in this instead of what I’m feeling for her right now.
I hear a commotion inside and see Samantha holding Gabriel through the doorway to the house. Okay, mission accomplished. We have what we came for. I know he killed Mallory, and now we have the kid. It’s time to end this.
I take a step back this time and hold my hands up in the air in surrender to him. I know by now someone has moved into position to snipe the motherfucker straight off of this earth. “I give up. You can have me. Just let the girl go.”
“You think I’m stupid. If I take her, it kills you too.”
“But you’re fucking wrong there. You killed me already. I died with the other one you killed, so you can’t do anything to me today.” He smiles a repulsive grin and takes a single step forward, feeling more confident in his position. Walk forward, motherfucker, walk forward.
I don’t directly watch Emmy’s eyes close as I pretty much say she doesn’t mean anything to me, even though I know that’s not the case as I stand here dying inside because he has her.
Out of nowhere, Emmy leans forward and slaps her hand up, forcing his into the air. She’s using defense moves we use in the Army, and it isn’t a second later that I hear the shot. Right between his fucking eyes. I know that was Ice, and I hope it gives her the justice I feel instantly. Mallory was her best friend. She’s been hurting like I have.
I run to Emmy and pull her into my arms. Her tears and hysteria make me want to hold her tighter, but I have to see he’s dead myself. Fire moves to us and pulls Emmy into his arms. I reach for his gun and stand over the Mexican at my feet.
I could put a round of bullets in his body, but the fact of the matter is, none of it will bring Mallory back. He’s dead. She’s dead. But somehow in the middle of all of this, I’ve found a second breath of air to prove I’m alive.
I miss her like crazy, and the second Jade comes barreling toward us, I hold her as she cries the hardest I’ve ever seen her cry. “I hate him. He took her from me, and I’ll never get her back.”
“I know. He took my entire life away from me. This doesn’t seem to be enough justice for what he’s done.” Just as I finish speaking, Samantha takes a step out of the house. She has Gabriel in her arms, with his head tucked into her neck.
“We have to get them out of here. We don’t have time to make sense of all of this now.” Kaleb moves toward us, and we both follow him to a van to clear out.
Emmy sits next to me in the seat. I know I need to talk to her, but right now, there’s a lump in my throat that won’t allow it.
She waits until we’ve been on the road for a few minutes before she talks to me. “I’m so glad you found your revenge. I’m sorry this had to happen to you.” She looks down at her hands, and I still can’t make myself form a word. I squeeze her against me and hope she can hear what I can’t seem to say out loud.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
HARRIS
The flight home has been strange. I’m trying to process what I’m feeling inside. Everyone is afraid to talk me about anything, which I’m thankful for. I thought killing Mallory’s murderer would make me feel better, but it didn’t.
I can see the hurt on Emmy’s face even though she’s busying herself with the young boy. Samantha looks nervous and a bit overwhelmed. I can only imagine what she’s going through. She’s uprooted her life in the past forty-eight hours, and now she’s surrounded by three overbearing people trying to make sure she has everything she needs. She’s about to learn what being part of the Maverick family means. It means you gain one hell of an extended family as well. It doesn’t matter what a person does in their life. It’s how big of a heart you have and how much you’re willing to sacrifice for another.
Emmy grounds me in a way I never thought would happen again. She’s real and honest, and I would be an absolute fool to not take things slow with her, to see where this could go.
I’ve made a family with every one of these people. Their love is something that spreads to their close friends as well, but honestly, they are great people. Talk about dedication and loyalty. Kaleb has proven that over and over again, and it just makes me feel at ease knowing Jade found someone like him. He loves her and she loves him. Life doesn’t get any better than that.
Shit. My heart hurts. I don’t know how to make the pain stop; it’s consumed me for far too long. It’s truly eating away at my insides, and I’m on the verge of numb again. My life will never be the same again. I’m not an idiot; I know this, and so does Emmy.
I feel an urge to scream at the top of my lungs until I collapse from pure exhaustion. My mind is warped, confused, and rattling around in my skull, bouncing to the beat of its own lonely drum. She’s gone. I will never see Mallory again, and that’s something I need to learn to cope with, no matter how hard it is.
I watch Emmy as she cautiously moves closer and places her hand on mine. I know what I said to the guy hurt her, and as soon as I can bring myself to talk, I’m going to tell her I didn’t mean it. I would never purposely hurt her. I’m not that guy.
“I’m sorry you’re hurting, but I’m here for you.” She wraps her arms around my waist, and even though I’m stiff at first, her tight squeeze has me melting against her. I place my arm around her, and we stay like that until we touch down at the compound, all the
while listening to Gabriel laugh at Kaleb’s ridiculous voices.
That kid is going to have a very loving life. He’ll be so damn protected, he’ll probably have a tough time getting away with anything fun as a teenager, but he’ll be safe nonetheless. That’s the most important thing of all. Happiness, health, and his safety, which he will have and more here.
Jackson, Steele, and Pierce meet us on the runway. It doesn’t take half a second for Jackson to zone in on Samantha. I knew she’d be his type. This will be interesting, watching him dance around the compound with actual ‘pussy’ being allowed, as he calls it. I don’t think she’s as easy as the one’s he’s used to though. In fact, I may have to place a bet that she’d give his feisty ass a long run for his money if he even tried to go there.
They all greet us with open arms, and before long, Maverick’s mom is with us, crying while she holds a very confused little boy. Samantha stands back and watches from a distance until Gabriel runs to her and begins to ask all kinds of questions. She bends down to his level, her eyes full of love as she explains in great detail who this woman is and what role she would love to play in his life. The two of them are in their own little bubble for a few minutes before Jackson bends down to shake the little guy’s hand. He’s already got his arm around her and is watching the young boy with adoration.
He stands, lifts the kid up, and stands by Samantha for the Maverick family get-together with a huge fucking smile on his face.
I decide to walk away. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for all of them. But right now, I just need some time. I start to walk out to the edge of the clearing. This is where I love to run to get away. The view here is amazing, and it’s a perfect place to just sit and think about the shit that’s built up over this past year.
I’m only there about fifteen minutes when I hear a crackle in the grass. I turn to see Emmy approaching me, and I swallow hard thinking about everything I need to say to her.
She sits down next to me, and we sit in silence for a while. My mind churns with everything I want to tell her, but my mouth can’t seem to say any of it, so I finally just say the first thing that comes to mind.
“I loved her. She was supposed to be my forever. Our baby was going to be our forever. My little life was perfect in every aspect until it was all taken away.” Her eyes fill with tears, and she leans against me as I continue to talk. She doesn’t ask any questions. She just listens to every word I say.
“I haven’t told anyone that we had just found out we were going to have a little girl. Mallory was so happy. I was happy. I didn’t care what we were having as long as it was healthy.” I pause and think about the irony of just wanting a healthy baby. What she would have looked like, what her personality would have been. All of it. “We were going to look at a little dress that day to bring her home in, just in case I was called out on a mission that would keep me away from witnessing her birth. I had no idea I’d never get to see her little face that day. The way her little fingers and toes moved on the screen haunts me every single day.” She wipes a tear from her face, and I do the same. She’s not looking at me, which somehow makes it easier to spill my most valued memories to her.
“Mallory was full of life. She had a spitfire mouth and wasn’t afraid to put me in my place. I wish like hell she could tell me to stop talking and to be able to hold her just one more time.” I have to stand. The lump in my throat is suffocating me. I can’t talk for a few seconds as I swallow down the painful memories that flash through my mind, but then I continue.
“She was everything to me. When she died, I thought I died. I knew there was nothing left of me to ever love again. I was a shell of a person with barely any will left to live. Then I met you.” She swipes her tears again, and I turn to look out at the scenery so I can get all of this out.
“You made me feel alive again. You brought me back to a world where I realize that not everything is gone.” I feel like I’m closing in on myself as I continue to talk. I’m trying like hell to make sure these next words come out the exact way I intend them to.
“Shit. I don’t know how to say everything I’m thinking. I’m trying to find a way to let go of my past, so I can think about what to do about the future. I didn’t mean to hurt you in Mexico. When he talked about hurting you, my gut twisted, and the fear of feeling another loss almost took me to my knees.” She stands and walks toward me when I stop talking to fight back the damn tears that won’t stop falling from my eyes.
“I don’t know what to do with you. Yes, I care about you so much, but I’m still in love with Mallory. How can I ask—”
“Stop,” she interrupts me before I have a chance to say anything else. “I don’t expect you to feel like you can’t love her or miss her. In fact, I’d think less of you if you didn’t. I know very well how much she meant to you. I’m not here to make you worry about a future with me. We can just spend time together and see where it takes us.” I take in her eyes filled with compassion and strength as she continues to talk around the pain in her heart.
“I hate more than anything you’ve had to go through all of this. I’ve come to care about you so much in just a short amount of time, but I’d give it all up to give you the chance to have her again. I see how tortured you are, and I wish like hell I could do something to help you.” She leans against my chest and cries out loud. Her beautiful heart pounds against mine. I wrap my arms around her, and we both just hold each other while I finally let it all out.
I haven’t cried for Mallory and the baby yet. I’ve bottled it all up and forced myself to feel everything but what I’m feeling right here. Soldiers don’t cry. We kill and get revenge, then we move the fuck on. So why is my face drenched in tears for something I’ll never have again?
‘You’re only human Beau, every human cries. Holding it in isn’t good for anyone, son. Let it out.’ My mom’s words from the day of the funeral ring through my ears and hit me straight in the chest.
Emmy’s tight hold on my waist somehow gives me the strength to finally stop the tears and take a deep breath. I think it’s my first real deep breath in months.
A bright-blue butterfly flutters around Emmy’s hair, and I watch as it lands on her shoulder. She doesn’t feel it, but I see it. “You have a bright-blue butterfly on your shoulder.” I tell her with a quiver in my voice. She moves slowly to look down at it. A smile splits across her face as she watches it closely until it flies off again.
“Someone once told me a butterfly means a new beginning.” She looks at me after she says it. I know she’s afraid to push anything with me, and in all reality, I’m not sure what I can handle at this time. But what I do know is, she calms me. She makes me feel alive. And that’s something I need in my life.
EPILOGUE
EMMY
Two Weeks Later
“Oh God, Beau. Please.”
“That’s right, baby. Beg me. Beg me to let you come all over my dick.”
To say we’re doing well is an understatement. I’ve spent every second of the last couple of weeks with this man, and every single day is a better one for him. His smile and love of life are returning, and I love that I get to experience this with him. His breakdowns are fewer than they were when we first returned, and Beau is getting stronger every day.
He’s learning that his life can go on and that his memories never have to fade away. He’s also come to terms with the fact that talking about his loss is something I need as much as he does. I want him to remember her and to always feel that he can come to me when he’s having a bad time. But I’ll also understand if he needs time to himself.
I’ve decided to move to the compound for good. Kaleb has plenty of work for me to do here with surveillance, and of course, I have enough medical knowledge to do most of the procedures they need done here. Which is bound to happen more often than not with this crazy, no-holds-barred crew. They’re reckless.
Our mom was finally convinced to move here once Gabriel moved in, and it just seemed like the rig
ht thing for me to do. Her home in Florida will become our new vacation spot. I can’t wait to take my nephew there and show him off to all my friends back home.
Beau was just a cherry on top when I made that decision. I would never make a decision on where to live based on a man, but he didn’t hurt my case to live here.
“That’s it. So. Deep.” He continues to move in me, and if we hadn’t already had sex three times today, I’d be selfish to get my release before he gets his. But needless to say, I’m fully satisfied in the sex department.
Something happened to us that day out on the clearing. He changed that day, and since then, we have been different. It’s a good different, and I just work to make sure he knows I’m here for him even with his past that’s very much a part of our everyday life.
“You feel so good. Feel me slide into that tight pussy of yours. You’re so beautiful. Emmy, look at me when I fuck you.” He pulls my eyes to his with his words and thrusts harder a few times before slowing his hips again. We watch each other intensely the entire time, which brings me to the edge faster than anything ever has in the past.
“Fuck, Emmy.” He bites down on my lips before he sucks the bottom one between his teeth. “Your lips are swollen. I love it when I leave a mark on you. It reminds you where I’ve been.” He’s been everywhere. I’ve been everywhere.
After a few more thrusts, we both moan through our orgasm. I claw my nails into his back as I come down from mine. He knows how to make me insane in the bedroom, and I love it.
“We may have to start sleeping apart so we can actually sleep, you know.” I know what his answer will be, but it’s fun to tease him anyway.
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