The Most to Lose

Home > Other > The Most to Lose > Page 20
The Most to Lose Page 20

by Landon, Laura


  Jonah thought of the huge amount of money he’d already spent making repairs and improvements to the Abbey. He thought of all the debts Hadleigh had paid. All the money Jonah now owed. Money he’d never be able to repay.

  A picture of Hadleigh toasting Jonah’s demise flashed before his eyes. Oh, how Hadleigh must be enjoying himself. How much more he’d enjoy himself when he demanded Jonah repay his debts and he couldn’t.

  How much more he would enjoy his success when he realized it wasn’t the money that Jonah couldn’t live without. It was Celie.

  Jonah sat straight and took a painful breath. If only he’d realized what Hadleigh was doing before it was too late. He should have known there were strings attached to his demand to pay Jonah’s father’s debts and repair the Abbey. He should have known Hadleigh had no intention of letting Jonah improve the lives of the Haywood tenants who’d gone without for so long. He should have known Hadleigh wouldn’t do anything that might benefit anything Jonah owned. He hated him too much.

  Jonah raked his fingers through his hair in an angry gesture, then halted. It was too late for him. He’d already lost everything that was important to him: the Abbey, the estate, the land, and Celie. But that didn’t mean everyone who depended on him needed to lose everything. The Haywood tenants had gone without too long. They deserved something good to happen to repay them for their loyalty and devotion.

  Jonah rose to his feet and faced Bundy. “I want a list of the supplies it will take to repair every tenant’s home and fix their outbuildings, Sergeant.”

  “Yes, sir, but—”

  “Then I want each of the tenant’s wives to choose something they want. I don’t care if it’s a new bed, a new table, enough cloth for six new dresses. I don’t care. Something that’s important to them.”

  “What?”

  “And I want the list before dark.”

  “Don’t you think you should go after—”

  Jonah slashed his hand through the air to stop Bundy from finishing his thought and paced back and forth across the room. “First thing in the morning, I want you to send some men to London to get any supplies we might need to finish repairing Haywood Abbey and bring them back. Tell them to make sure the bills for everything get sent to the Duke of Hadleigh.”

  “Are you sure, Cap’n?”

  “Yes! Now, move! We don’t have much time.”

  “But Lady Cecelia, she’s no doubt on her way to London. Don’t you think you should…?”

  Jonah’s knees weakened. He wanted nothing more than to go after Celie, but it wouldn’t do any good. Not yet. She was too angry with him, too hurt. He needed to give her time before he went after her.

  “I want you to send one of the local lads to the village to hire as many workers as he can find. And not only men. Women, too. They can do some of the lighter chores.”

  Jonah donned the determined expression he’d used so often when issuing orders during the war. It was an expression he’d perfected that left no doubt as to his seriousness and hid his fear. “Go, Bundy! We’ve got to get everything we need before it’s too late.”

  Jonah almost choked on the words. A pain more severe than anything he’d ever suffered stabbed through his heart.

  Celie had left him, which meant he’d lost the one thing that was most important to him. He’d lost everything.

  But that didn’t mean that everyone on his estate had to go without any longer. The Haywood tenants deserved decent roofs over their heads and at least one luxury they’d only dreamed of having.

  Jonah headed for the door almost at a run. Hadleigh may have destroyed him, but he refused to go down without a fight. He hadn’t endured the horrors of war without learning some of the skills it took to survive.

  He would think of himself later, when everyone else who depended on him had been taken care of. Then he’d let himself think of how much he loved Celie. And he’d let himself think of how impossible it would be to live without her.

  And he’d do everything in his power to get her back.

  Chapter 20

  Jonah sat behind the massive mahogany desk in his study with his booted feet propped on the corner of the desk, a nearly empty whiskey bottle in one hand and a more than half-full glass of whiskey in the other. This was the third day since he’d returned to London.

  It was the third time he’d gone to see her. His third attempt to convince her that he hadn’t meant anything he’d said.

  The third time he’d been turned away at her door.

  He lifted the glass but stopped halfway to his mouth. The thought of taking another swallow of the vile liquid turned his stomach.

  Bloody hell, he couldn’t even manage to do a proper job of getting drunk.

  He set the glass on the desk and dropped his head back onto the cracked leather. The entryway was finally quiet for a little while.

  Since the Duke of Hadleigh had let it be known that he would not cover the astronomical bills Jonah had amassed, Jonah had been besieged with creditors and bill collectors.

  For a while, he thought he might not survive with his flesh intact, but as the man he’d trusted to cover his back during the war had done so often before, Bundy had come to his rescue in this as well.

  He wasn’t sure what scheme his sergeant had concocted to clear his home of the scores of creditors threatening his life, but it had worked. His town house was peaceful for the first time since he’d returned.

  He closed his eyes and prayed that, for at least a little while, he would be allowed a few restful minutes when he wouldn’t be tortured with the fact that he’d lost Celie. He prayed that the hurt and the agony that ate at him night and day would ease for just a moment. But he knew that wasn’t possible.

  Jonah thought of the lies Hadleigh had told him and cursed himself over again. He thought of the pain Celie felt, believing the two people who loved her most had betrayed her. He knew her whole world had been destroyed and she was left with nothing stable to hold on to.

  Jonah rose to his feet and placed another piece of wood into the burning flames, then sat in his chair and propped his feet on the corner of the desk.

  In his mind, he relived the scene with Lady Kendall. If only there had been another way to keep Celie safe. If only he’d been able to avoid saying the words that had destroyed her love for him.

  If only she hadn’t found out how little Hadleigh thought of her that he’d use her as a pawn to gain revenge.

  That wouldn’t have saved him, because the condemning lies had come from his own mouth, but perhaps she wouldn’t realize her brother thought so little of her he’d used her to exact his revenge.

  Hadleigh’s threat came back as a roaring warning that echoed with the force of a violent thunderstorm.

  When you have the most to lose, I’ll take it all.

  And he had. He’d taken Celie away from him.

  He reached for the bottle he’d left beside his chair, but stopped when he heard voices out in the entryway.

  Bloody creditors!

  He pulled the stopper from the bottle, then paused midway in pouring more liquor into his glass. The door few open and Lady Amanda Radburn stormed into the room with Bundy on her heels.

  “I’m sorry, Cap’n, but the lady insisted.”

  “Lady Amanda,” Jonah said, not bothering to pour the liquor into his glass but tipping the bottle to his mouth. “Why doesn’t your persistence surprise me?”

  “Are you drunk?” She placed her hands on her hips and glared at him.

  Jonah laughed. “Unfortunately, no.”

  “Good.”

  His guest evaluated him for a second, then came into the room and sat in the chair facing Jonah’s desk.

  “Bundy,” he said, sitting up in his chair, “see if Cook has something to serve with tea.”

  Lady Amanda held up her hand. “That’s not necessary, Bundy. I won’t be here long enough for tea.”

  “You shouldn’t be here at all.” Jonah sat back in his chair and placed the bot
tle on the corner of the desk. He needed to keep it within reach. He’d already decided if Celie’s friend had come here to chastise him for breaking Celie’s heart and call him every name Celie had been too upset to use, perhaps the whiskey he hadn’t finished would come in handy. “So, why have you come?” He tried to look bored.

  “To hear the truth instead of the lies you told Lady Kendall.”

  Jonah felt the air rush from his body. “What makes you think I lied to Lady Kendall?”

  “Because I have the advantage of watching the players in this drama from an objective viewpoint. I just left Celie and—”

  “How is she? Is she all right?”

  Lady Amanda slashed her hand through the air. “No, she’s not all right. She’s hurt. She’s miserable. Her heart is broken, and she’s certain it will never heal again.”

  She leveled him with an evaluative glare. “Do you care?”

  “Of course I care.” Jonah dropped his feet to the floor. “No one should have to endure this kind of pain. No one should be submitted to such cruelty, especially from the two people she thought loved her most.”

  “Are you talking about yourself and Hadleigh?”

  Jonah felt a heavy weight drop to the pit of his stomach. “Yes. Me, because I took everything Hadleigh said at face value. Because I didn’t realize there was an ulterior motive to his machinations. Hadleigh, because he used his sister without caring that she would be hurt.”

  “I’d like to know what happened.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I think you truly love Celie.” She kept her gaze focused on him and didn’t let it waver. “Do you love her?” she asked. “And I want the truth. If you dare lie to me, what Hadleigh did to you will be nothing compared to the hell Celie and I can put you through.”

  “Yes, I love her. I’d be a fool not to. She’s the most amazing woman I’ve ever met. And…”

  “Yes?”

  Jonah swallowed. “I’m not sure I can live the rest of my life without her.”

  “That’s all I wanted to know.” Lady Amanda slid back in her chair and folded her hands in her lap. “Now, how did you and Celie get yourself into such a mess?”

  Jonah took a deep breath, then told Celie’s best friend how Hadleigh had paid all of Jonah’s father’s debts. He repeated Hadleigh’s demand that Jonah begin work repairing Haywood Abbey and his promise to cover the expenses until he received Celie’s dowry.

  When he finished, Lady Amanda slammed her fists on the cushioned arms of the chair and bolted to her feet.

  “That conniving bastard!” She stormed across the room like a raging hurricane. “He had no intention of allowing you to marry Celie. No intention of you ever getting the money from her dowry. He used her to ruin you.”

  Jonah blinked several times at the very unladylike expletives that came from Lady Amanda’s mouth. “It won’t do any good to accuse Hadleigh of anything,” he said. “He’ll only deny he intended any such thing. Besides, he still holds the trump card.”

  Lady Amanda lifted her eyebrows. “And what is that?”

  “He must approve Celie’s choice of a husband. If we marry without his approval, I won’t get even one pound of her dowry.”

  “You would not take Celie without her money?”

  Jonah leaned forward. “I am destitute, my lady. Considering Hadleigh’s well-conceived plan, I’ll be lucky if it takes even a fortnight to be shunned by all of society again. What kind of life could I give Celie? Without her dowry, I couldn’t allow her to become my wife, even if she wanted.”

  “Maybe if we—”

  Jonah held up his hand to stop her words. “I’ve already considered every conceivable possibility. There’s no way. Nothing short of murder.”

  For several seconds, neither of them spoke. Celie’s friend had a faraway look in her eyes, as if she were contemplating something that required a great deal of thought.

  With a slow nod of her head, she lifted her gaze and focused her attention on Jonah.

  “I would like to invite you to tea, Lord Haywood.”

  Jonah shook his head. “I’m sorry, Lady Amanda, but I’m not—”

  “Neither am I.” She held up her hand to stop him. “The tea I’m inviting you to will be held at my residence in exactly one hour.”

  “Will Celie be there?”

  “Yes. As well as the Duke of Hadleigh.”

  Jonah smiled. At least the corners of his mouth lifted in what he hoped would pass for a smile. “I’m afraid the Duke of Hadleigh will not welcome me anywhere near him.”

  “That’s not your concern.” She waved her hand as if it were possible to brush away the Duke of Hadleigh when talking about him.

  “Are you sure you can convince Hadleigh to come?”

  “Oh, yes. Hadleigh will do anything in his power to make amends with Celie. She’s refused to see him since she returned to London. After how he used her, he’s truly afraid that he may have lost her forever.”

  Jonah shook his head. “I don’t think there’s anything you can do, my lady. I applaud you for making the effort to help me, but—”

  “Do you have a plan to get the woman you love back? Or don’t you love her enough to try?”

  Jonah’s temper rose. “I’ve even considered murder, my lady, and I’d do it if I thought I would end up with Celie and not a hangman’s noose. Yes, I want her enough. My blood turns to ice at the thought of having to live the rest of my life without her.”

  Jonah rose to his feet and walked from one side of the room to the other in long, angry strides. “I can’t believe what a fool I was not to see this coming! I should have known Hadleigh hadn’t given up on his vow to exact revenge for Melisande’s death. Instead, I allowed a friendship I thought still existed between Hadleigh and myself to control my judgment, and I am paying for my stupidity.”

  “Hadleigh’s purpose was to take advantage of you, and it’s a point to your credit that you didn’t realize what he was doing. It means that you’re not as coldhearted as he. It means your mind is not as twisted with hatred as his.”

  Jonah stared at Celie’s friend for several long seconds. There was something quite pretty about her, and he wondered why she hadn’t been spoken for. Or if she had, why she hadn’t accepted anyone’s offer.

  “Why are you doing this?”

  She looked at him as if he’d just asked the most ridiculous question imaginable. “Because Celie is my best friend and I can’t stand by while my best friend is miserable and not try to do everything in my power to help her.”

  He caught an evasive look in her eyes before she quickly hid it. “And the other reason is?”

  “There is no other reason, my lord,” she said with a laugh.

  “I think there is. Another reason that is equally as important to you as trying to keep your best friend from suffering.”

  Lady Amanda tugged on her gloves as if preparing to leave. “If there is,” she said, avoiding looking him directly in the eyes, “it is a reason I intend to keep to myself. Now, if you will kindly make yourself presentable, I will go to invite the Duke of Hadleigh for what I pray will be his downfall.”

  Jonah watched Lady Amanda Radburn walk from his room, then went upstairs to shave and dress for tea.

  Chapter 21

  You what!

  Celie stared at her best friend as if she’d lost her “You can’t be serious!”

  “I’ve never been more serious in my life. Lord Haywood should arrive momentarily. And so should your brother.” Amanda reached over and clasped both Celie’s hands in hers. “There are some things you don’t know—important things. And you need to be aware of them.”

  Celie shook her head. “I’ve heard all I need to. You don’t know what it’s like to realize you were nothing more to your brother than a pawn he could use to ruin the man he hated. And”—she took a shaky breath—“you don’t know what it’s like to find out that the man you’ve always loved only pretended to love you to destroy his most hated enemy
.” She felt a fresh onslaught of tears fill her eyes.

  “If that were true, I wouldn’t lift a finger to help Lord Haywood get you back, and you know it.”

  Celie looked at the serious expression on her friend’s face. “How can you think Jonah loves me? You heard him. He only used me to get even with Hadleigh for everything he’d done to him after Melisande’s death.”

  “And you don’t think he could have been lying?”

  Celie shook her head. “I’ve always known Jonah couldn’t love me. But I’d loved him for so long I let myself believe he could.”

  “Then you need to hear the truth with your own ears. You need to hear how your brother used not only you but Lord Haywood to achieve his revenge. That’s the only way you’ll ever trust Haywood.”

  “What makes you think Hadleigh will come once he finds out Jonah will be here?”

  “Because he doesn’t know—yet.” Amanda smiled when she heard a commotion at the front door. “But he will soon.”

  Celie recognized her brother’s voice and looked up as the butler admitted him into the room.

  “Cecelia.” He rushed to the sofa where she was and sat beside her. He turned toward her and clasped her hands in his.

  She pulled her fingers out of his grasp and rose to her feet.

  He rose to stand beside her. “Please, allow me to explain. Nothing is what you think. You have always been the most important person in the world to me. I would never have let anything hurt you.”

  “Wouldn’t you have?”

  “No. You don’t understand. It was Haywood. I had to—”

  Jonah’s voice echoed from the foyer, and his sure footsteps thudded as he made his way toward the drawing room. Her heart thundered in her breast.

  The door opened, and he stepped inside the room.

  His gaze focused on her first, but that wasn’t a surprise. They were so attuned to each other it wasn’t uncommon for her to realize the precise moment Jonah walked into a room. Or for him to find her the minute he arrived. She didn’t know what it was, but it had been that way between them from the beginning.

 

‹ Prev