by Robin Roseau
"There are a limited number of exits," Lara said. "Take who you need."
"Are you going to be the one to disarm her?" Elisabeth asked. "She knows she won't kill me with a silver knife to the gut, but it would sure slow me down."
"Fuck you both," I said quietly. I started dropping my silver in a pile on the floor. When I was done, I said, "Who wants to pat me down, make sure I don't have a holdout?"
And damned if Lara didn't do just that.
"Serena," Elisabeth said.
"Not me," Serena replied. "She's the one who found my kids. She asks me to step aside, I'm going to step aside."
Lara began to growl.
I turned to the enforcer. "Serena, tell the alpha you'll follow orders. And follow them, no matter how much I beg you later. But I promise, I won't put you in that position."
Serena looked between Lara and me. "This could not have been more poorly handled. I will do my duty, but you will resolve this by the time we return to Madison or I am resigning my position and moving my family to Boulder."
Serena stepped forward and gently took my arm. Elisabeth took the other before opening the door. The two of them marched me three doors down to the room I'd been sharing with Elisabeth. I didn't say a word to either of them. Serena used a card key and let us all in.
"Serena, take the bathroom window," Elisabeth said. "If the fox leaves by that window, I will consider it extreme dereliction of duty. Michaela, do you know what the punishment is for extreme dereliction of duty?"
"No."
"Death."
Without a word, Serena turned on her heel, grabbed a chair, and carried it into the bathroom. She settled into position guarding one of the two exits from the room. I turned to Elisabeth.
"Did my wife just ask for a divorce?"
"You need to calm down."
"You just accused me of being willing to stab you with silver, Elisabeth. My wife agreed with your assessment. You threatened to murder someone if I leave. And I'm the one who is responding badly? All that on top of shutting me out of the search for my friend!" My voice went up after each statement. "And that is after I was the one who identified the lion's share of pertinent information. What. The. Fuck!" The last was screamed.
I was practically foaming at the mouth I was so livid, and the more I thought about it, the worse it got.
"I did not believe you would respond calmly to Lara's heavy-handed bullshit," Elisabeth said calmly. "I was worried you might do something you would later regret. I was also telling the alpha that she had gone way too far, and that she was in deep shit, if she didn't already know that."
I didn't have any response to that.
"As for Serena -- she stated clearly she would disobey direct orders, and I could not ignore that. I slapped her down as lightly as I could get away with. And I did so in a fashion that you won't ask her to help you, which would only make the situation worse. If you want out of this motel room, it's either through me or once Lara realizes what a colossally bad job she did bungling this."
I looked up into her face. She was returning my look with one of concern. I took several deep breaths, trying to calm down.
"One general, Michaela," Elisabeth said. "Right or wrong, one general. And it's Lara. She needs to know she can count on me. I told her she was wrong, but I still backed her. Would you have me do it any other way?"
I took several more breaths before replying. "No."
"Now, I am going to repeat. Lara handled this exceedingly poorly. However, she is right. You need to stay in tonight, for the reasons she so poorly iterated. You are right. You have been invaluable. And I suspect your role in this isn't done. But right now, Greg's people need to do their jobs."
"What is the real risk of me snooping around, say, two hours after full dark?"
"They notice you. They set up fox traps."
"Like I am going to get caught in a fox trap. That is an insulting suggestion."
"I could trap you," she told me calmly.
"When I'm aware there might be traps?" She nodded. "I am not willing to concede that point, although it might be interesting to try it sometime. But you know I'm a werefox. You would be going to much greater lengths. They would see a fox, not a werefox."
"Michaela, there are people in the FBI who know about weres. We don't know that assistant agent in charge Block doesn't know. And we don't know he hasn't told his brother. We don't know whether we're dealing strictly with Harvey Block or his brother. For all we know, this could be engineered by Mr. Fibbie."
I paced around the room for a while, absorbing everything she had said. I ended my pacing by staring up into her face. She was remarkably calm.
"And we couldn't just discuss this calmly in the next room?"
"You were pushy and Lara made an extreme overreaction. She'll start kicking herself soon and be over to apologize and explain herself."
"She can get stuffed."
"She probably won't be by until she thinks there's a chance your reaction might be something other than that."
I sighed. "All right. I'm still pissed, but I'm not pissed at you any longer. In fact, I won't even go over to my suitcase and load up on the next set of silver I have waiting for me. Isn't that magnanimous of me?"
"Quite."
I prowled the room for a while. Elisabeth guarded the door. I turned to her. "You're going to guard the door all night?"
"Until relieved."
I turned my back on her. There wasn't anything to do in the room, and I knew my tolerance for sitting on my hands would be less than five minutes. I turned on the television and went channel surfing. I wasn't much of a television viewer.
I flipped it back off and reached for my phone, only to realize Lara had taken it.
"Seriously?" I said.
"Who did you want to call?"
"Angel."
Elisabeth called Angel. "Do they have you doing anything?"
"I'm on a food run," Angel replied.
"Call me back when you're done," Elisabeth said.
"We going to spring her?" Angel asked.
"No. We're going to entertain her."
"All right."
I sat on the bed and fumed. And then I turned petty. I reached to my ears, fumbled for a minute, then pulled the four earrings out. I slammed the earrings on the nightstand then concentrated on healing the holes.
"Burning bridges?" Elisabeth asked. "You know she wanted you to keep those."
"It is my body," I said. "I will do what I want with it."
I opened my blouse then lifted my bra away.
"Please stop," Elisabeth said. "You know she's going to apologize. You know she's going to be very sorry."
"Her behavior is a continuing pattern, Elisabeth. She might apologize, but she is going to continue doing it because she knows if she apologizes, I'll forgive her, and she gets away with it."
"This isn't going to change anything," Elisabeth said. "You shouldn't do this while you're angry."
I didn't respond to that. I pulled both of the piercings out of my nipples, slammed them onto the nightstand as well, then healed the holes.
Elisabeth sighed.
I adjusted my clothing, then I concentrated on my crotch. I wasn't sure if I could make the hair there grow back, but I was going to try.
I felt tingling and itching, and after several minutes I reached down into my jeans. "Ah," I said. "Nice and furry. Like nature intended."
I ignored any response Elisabeth may have.
Then I punched the pillow several times, rolled over, and tried to sleep.
* * * *
I must have been tired. I slept through Angel coming in to check on me and offer food for everyone. I slept through someone covering me with a blanket from the other bed. I slept through Lara arriving. I slept through her discovery of the jewelry sitting on the nightstand. I slept through her climbing onto the bed.
I woke the instant she tried to pull me into her arms.
"Get your hands off me," I told her coldly.<
br />
"I'm sorry."
"I don't give a fuck. You embarrassed the hell out of me, treating me like a wayward, ill-behaved child. You patted me down! You took my phone. What? I was going to call Harvey Block and warn him we were coming? Get the fuck away from me. When we have rescued Virginia, I might, and I repeat, might, consider listening to any apologies you have to offer."
"Please, honey, calm down and listen."
"I was fucking asleep," I said. "I don't get much calmer than that."
"You're not calm now."
"Would you be?" I spat at her.
"Just let me explain what happened. Then if you want me to leave you alone, I will."
I hadn't moved since she arrived in the bed except to shrug her off every time she tried to touch me. I continued to stare at the wall next to the bathroom door.
"We were both there. I think I know what happened."
"You don't know why. You think you do, perhaps, but you don't."
I didn't respond.
"Michaela, please. I think you want to know why. If nothing else, it will give you more fuel for your anger."
"Shut up," I said. "Do not make jokes about this."
"I'm sorry," she said
"Fine. Why did you treat me like that? Did I do something to deserve it?"
"No, you didn't," she said. "I was right about you staying inside tonight, but I was completely, entirely in the wrong how I handled it."
"Fine. Why?"
"Because I was so blinded by jealousy I couldn't think straight."
I lay there for several minutes, thinking about it. To her credit, Lara didn't say a further word and didn't try to touch me.
"Has anything come to light that suggests my services are needed tonight?"
"No," she said. "Not yet."
"Am I still under house arrest?"
She didn't answer right away, but I wasn't going to say another word until she did. Finally she said, "No. I already sent Serena and Elisabeth away."
"Did you apologize to Serena?"
"We talked calmly. She apologized. I admitted she was right when she said I could have handled it better. She's almost as angry at me as you are."
"Go away," I told her. "I may consider accepting an apology in the morning. I may require it to be as public as the humiliation for which you are apologizing. I haven't decided yet. I may consider Elisabeth's advice before deciding."
She didn't move.
"If you aren't leaving, please tell me where I may sleep, Alpha."
She moved off the bed. "When you decide to go for a walk, please, Michaela, take your guards."
"I will consider your request," I said. "We are not sharing a room tonight. You may send anyone else in here you want. You will find somewhere else for one or the other of us."
"I'll switch with Angel tonight, if you don't mind. And Elisabeth will be in the other bed. If you don't mind."
"That's fine."
She got to the door.
"Lara."
"Little Fox?"
"Is this going to happen again?"
She didn't answer right away. "I wish I could promise it won't."
"I would never cheat on you, Lara. Telling me I make you jealous isn't helping."
"I'm sorry. I can't help it," she said. "I know you wouldn't cheat, honey."
"I am still hurt and angry, but I'll get over it. Good night."
I lay awake, staring at the wall, until Angel and Elisabeth came in together. They tried to be quiet, but I sat up. I was still dressed.
"What time is it?" I asked.
"Shortly after midnight," Angel replied. "Are you all right?"
"I will be." I looked at Elisabeth. "Enforcer, if I stated I was going for a run, what would you do?"
"Ask you to please give Angel and me a chance to shift. And perhaps suggest we drive somewhere more appropriate first."
"I am hurt and angry at how she treated me," I said. "But I am livid that my liberty may be denied to me on a jealous whim. My tolerance has reached a limit. If something like this occurs again, I will not willingly disarm."
"Michaela," Elisabeth said gently. "There have been times in the past you have acted in an unreasonable, headstrong fashion. This was not one of them, but it has happened in the past, and I believe it will happen in the future."
I crossed the room to stand in front of her, glaring up at her. "Do you have a point, Enforcer?"
"You are the only alpha's mate I know of that is offered remotely the freedom you enjoy."
"Do they accept their incarceration willingly?"
"I have not talked to them," she replied. "You should perhaps talk to Brooke about her mother."
"I will not accept incarceration, Enforcer."
"I know that," she said. "So does Lara. No one is suggesting that. I am suggesting, however, that you should trust me."
Angel stepped over to me and wrapped an arm around me. "I think you can trust Elisabeth."
"I'll think about it," I finally decided. Which wasn't much of a decision, but it was the best I could do at the time. "I am going to bed."
"You didn't want a run?"
"I do," I admitted. "But I want to turn off my brain more, and I don't think a run will accomplish that."
I gathered a few things together and slipped into the bathroom. When I returned to the main room, Angel was holding my removed piercings and looking at them sadly. "I thought you liked them," she said in a small voice.
"I did."
"Please let me put them back in," she said.
"I healed the holes."
Angel looked up at me sadly.
"Angel," I said. "She can not continue to treat me like this. I will increase the pain to her until she stops. This was the biggest thing I could think of that didn't involve people getting hurt. And I know it won't be enough."
"Michaela," Elisabeth said. "This is going to happen again. She can remain so cool and in control about everything else, but about you, she loses her head. This is part of who she is, and you need to find a way to accept it, because she is not going to change."
"It's a wolf thing," Angel said. "I'm already getting like that with Scarlett. She thinks it's cute."
"Lara is an exceedingly dominant, possessive wolf," Elisabeth said. "When she feels you pulling away, she overreacts. It isn't your fault, so don't take this as me telling you it is. But if you go with the flow instead of getting your back up, she won't overreact as badly. She'll still overreact, but not by as much."
"She's not telling you that you did anything wrong," Angel said. "She's telling you how to manage your mate's behavior."
"So tonight, for instance. This wasn't because of what I told Tim?"
"That started it," Elisabeth said. "And she was going to overreact. If you had become submissive, it would have been a small overreaction. But you went exceedingly dominant, and she lost it."
"So my fault."
"No. Her fault. Lara is very strong and quite amazing," Elisabeth said. "She is a far better alpha than I could be. But sometimes she needs help. She isn't perfect, Michaela. She can handle you being dominant to others, but not to her. And perhaps not to others when she is feeling vulnerable."
"All right," I said. "Thank you. I'll give her a chance to talk me back into those. Well, to talk those back into me, I guess."
They both smiled at my word play.
"I am going to sleep now," I said. "You two are not obligated to stay with me."
"We are, actually," Angel said. "But I want to be here."
"You would rather be home with Scarlett."
"Actually," she said. "No, I wouldn't. I would rather Scarlett were here."
* * * *
I slept fretfully after that. Angel shared my bed, but my body knew it wasn't Lara. I found myself pressed against Angel's back at one point but woke up enough to move away.
I finally got up at six, pulled some clothes on, and slipped onto Elisabeth's bed. She was already awake, and she watched me. We lay on the bed t
ogether, facing each other.
"Pride says I should make her come to me. Pride says I deserve an exceedingly public groveling from her."
"We all bitched her out," Elisabeth said. "If you wait, she'll come to you. She'd be here now if she thought she was welcome."
"Do I deserve the groveling?"
"Deserve? Probably. Do I think you should make her? I don't think it would be good for the long term health of your relationship. She'll do it, but she'll remember you made her do it."
I closed my eyes for a few minutes. When I opened them, Elisabeth was still watching me.
"I want her to talk me back into the piercings," I said. "Maybe not the ears. But the others. I don't want to admit it to her."
Elisabeth smiled. "You won't have to admit it."
"Do you have a key to the room she is in?"
Elisabeth glanced at the nightstand. I picked up the card key. "I'll be going to the coffee shop in a few minutes. I do not know if Lara is going along or not. If she goes, I do not know if she will want additional company. If I am going alone, I will give you a chance to decide if you want to come."
"May I have enough time to shower?"
I nodded. "I won't run off."
"Thank you. This will be a lot easier for all of us if we can all trust each other, Michaela."
"I know."
I slipped out of the room, hearing Elisabeth climb out of bed behind me. I slipped into the room next door containing Lara, Karen, Serena and Wendy. Four pairs of eyes watched me as I entered the room. Lara sat up and I walked straight to her, stopping two feet away.
We looked at each other. I didn't know what I wanted to say. She opened her mouth to speak, but I shook my head slightly, and she stopped.
"How long did you wait to see me last night, once you had calmed down enough to know you should?"
"I knew I was wrong the entire time I was being a bitch," she said.
"Next time," I said, "Give me fifteen minutes, then apologize, even if I'm not ready for it. I won't accept right away, but we won't have to spend the night apart."
She nodded.
"If you apologize, you better mean it! If I am in the wrong, then you let me stew until I figure it out."
"All right." She smiled hesitantly.
"I am going down to the coffee shop," I said. "Would you like to join me?"
"We don't need-"