His head dipped to hers and he captured her mouth.
She opened to him, giving him as good as she got. Once he tasted her, felt her body against his, heard her little moaning sounds, he was lost.
And from this woman, he might never recover.
* * *
The next afternoon, Johnny and Wes worked with Brady to help him learn how to stay on the sheep’s back. He had to admit the kid was determined if nothing else.
Several of the ranch hands were watching and cheering the boy on as he gripped the sheep around the neck and hung on for dear life as the animal raced out of the chute.
“That’s it, Brady. You ride ’em.”
Wes had his stopwatch to check the time. The longest ride had been six seconds. But for a boy turning five years old next week that was pretty good.
Johnny went and helped the boy up. “You did great, son.”
“Did I stay on long enough?”
“Almost. But I think we should stop for today.”
Johnny went to remove the protective helmet from Brady’s head, but the boy backed away. “No, I need to do it again until I get better.”
“You are better, Brady,” Wes said. “But you’re tired and so are the sheep. You’ve been at this for over an hour.”
The foreman went to gather up the sheep in the corral. He and the men took them back to the pasture.
Johnny could see the boy’s tears building and knelt down beside him. “Hey, what’s the matter, partner?”
“I hafta get better. Tucker said I’m a baby and he’s gonna win the belt buckle. I want to beat him.”
“Well, Tucker is wrong. You never know who’s gonna win until the day of the rodeo. But the most important thing to remember is that you play fair. Don’t be a bad sport. Win or lose, you always have to be polite. Shake hands. Got that?”
Brady nodded. “I want to make Grandpa proud of me.”
How did he answer that one? “I only met your grandfather once, but I knew right off Clay Calhoun was a good man. He’d want you to be a good sport, too. A real cowboy, like your grandfather, is honest and truthful and he doesn’t cheat.”
Brady nodded. “What if Tucker is not very nice to me?”
“You still be nice to him.”
The kid wrinkled his nose. “What if I don’t want to?”
Johnny had to work to keep from laughing. “Someday you’ll be glad you did because that makes you the bigger man.”
Brady wiped the hair off his forehead. “And because it’s the cowboy way.”
“That’s right.”
The boy grinned and threw himself into Johnny’s arms.
Something tightened in Johnny’s chest as he felt those tiny arms wrap around his neck. “I’m glad you came to live here,” Brady whispered against his cheek.
Johnny found himself cradling the child close. “I’m glad I did, too.” He thought of the boy’s mother, and knew things would never be the same for him when he left Larkville.
Fighting his emotions, he finally released Brady and stood. “I better go and do my job now.”
“Can I watch you work Storm?”
“I’m not sure. That’s your mother’s decision.”
“His mother says it’s fine.”
They both turned to see Jess standing there dressed in her usual jeans and boots, her hair braided and her straw hat shading her whiskey eyes.
“Mom,” Brady said, and ran to her. “I was riding sheep.”
“I heard that from Wes.”
“And I’m gonna beat Tucker.”
“Brady,” Johnny warned.
“Well, I’m gonna try. But if I lose, I’m still gonna be nice to him. Now, can I watch Johnny work with Storm?”
She looked up at Johnny and smiled. “If I get to come along, too.”
“Sure, Mom. You can come, too.” He started tugging her arm. “Can’t she, Johnny?”
He found he had trouble speaking and gave a nod. The boy took off in front of them.
Johnny fell into step beside her. “You’re home early.”
She smiled. “Since I’m the boss, I can take off a little early if I need to. It was a slow day, anyway. And I didn’t want you to have to spend the entire day with a five-year-old.”
He moved closer, inhaled that familiar scent and memories from last night flooded into his head. “He’s a great kid, but honestly, I’d rather spend time with his mother.”
“And Brady’s mother wouldn’t mind a little time with you.”
He smiled. Damn, he shouldn’t be this happy. “That could be arranged.”
“Is that a promise?” she asked teasingly, then heard Brady calling to them. “Looks like it’s going to be a lot later.”
The boy ran back to them. “Come on, Mom, Johnny.”
“Oh, honey, I forgot.” She stopped. “We’re going to Aunt Molly’s house tonight.”
“You mean Grandma Carol and Grandpa Ben’s house.” The boy looked at Johnny. “They aren’t my real my grandma and grandpa, but I got permission to call them that.”
“Lucky you.”
“Hey, Mom, can Johnny go with us?”
Johnny saw the surprised look on her face, and he rushed on to say, “Brady, that’s all right. I have a lot to do tonight.”
Jess couldn’t hide her disappointment. “Anything that can’t wait for another evening? The Daytons would love to have you. They’ve been wanting to meet you.”
“Yeah, Johnny,” Brady said. “You gotta go, it’s homemade pizza. And we get to help.”
She smiled. “Yeah, Johnny. This is the time to get to know some people in town. And Carol and Ben are some of the best.”
“Oh, boy,” Brady cheered. “It’s gonna be so much fun.” The child took off toward the house to get cleaned up.
Jess turned to Johnny. “Oh, boy, it’s going to be so much fun.”
He grabbed her close, not caring who saw them. “I guarantee it’s not going to be as much fun as last night.” His mouth captured hers. He didn’t seem to care about much else except being with Jess.
And that wasn’t good, but at the moment he didn’t care.
* * *
The Dayton family household was loud and filled with laughter. Molly had two younger brothers, Chase and Tyler, and when the three were together, it was chaos. Jess loved being a part of it.
They didn’t live in the big old farmhouse where Molly had been raised anymore, but the rental house in town was just as warm and inviting. Carol, with Brady’s help, had made three large pizzas with numerous toppings.
The best part was that Johnny fit right in with her friends. Besides her family, the Daytons were the people who meant the most to her. Jess knew it was wishful thinking that Johnny would stay in Larkville and be a part of her life but that hadn’t stopped her from dreaming of a future with the man. A father for Brady. Every time she’d seen Johnny with her son she couldn’t help but think of being a family. He’d been so understanding and so wonderful with her child. How could she not love him?
“I don’t like Johnny anymore,” Molly said as she came up to her. “He’s siding with my brothers.”
Jess smiled. “All men side with your brothers. You just let them get to you.”
Molly turned to her. “You got it bad for him, don’t you?”
“I could lie and say no, but I’m trying to keep it casual.”
“Jessica Calhoun, you don’t do casual.” There was a long silence, then Molly said, “Does he know you’re in love with him?”
Jess could act surprised, but Molly knew her too well. “No, and he probably never will. He’s leaving in a few weeks.”
Her friend shook her head. “Why is it that we can’t keep guys around? I mean, we’re great-looking and smart. Ah, maybe that’s it. We should play dumb and we could get a man.”
Jess didn’t want just any man, she wanted Johnny Jameson. He’d been honest from the beginning, and hadn’t fed her any promises. She knew where she stood. Too bad that didn’t ea
se the pain.
Johnny looked across the big kitchen at Jess. He found he didn’t like being so far away from her. He enjoyed her company.
“Those girls are pretty special to me.”
Johnny turned to find Ben Dayton. The older man in his fifties had thinning gray hair and an easy smile.
“They’ve been inseparable since they met in kindergarten,” Ben went on to say. “I couldn’t love Jess any more if she were my own.”
“I can see how you’d feel that way.”
The older man studied him. “And I can tell you care about both Jess and the boy. I’m glad.” Ben leaned back against the counter and took a drink of his beer. “She had it pretty rough for a while. As nice as this town is, some people weren’t very kind during her pregnancy. Clay protected her as best he could.” There was a big grin. “And you don’t want to tick off a man like Clay. Some people in this town are sorry they did.” Ben shook his head. “Nope, you don’t mess with a Calhoun.”
“I take it you were friends with Clay?”
Ben nodded. “We’d known each other since school, along with Gus Everett. You might have met him already. He owns the gas station.”
“Yeah, I’ve seen him a few times.”
Ben sighed. “Gus and I still miss our poker buddy. It’s not the same without Clay. That damn stubbornness of his ended his life far too soon.” The man’s features softened. “I’m glad you got to meet him. He was a good man. One of the best. Everyone loved him, and they’re plannin’ to honor him with a big celebration at the fall festival this coming October.”
Johnny couldn’t help but think how lucky Jess was. “He was a lucky man to have so much family.”
Ben smiled. “Yes, he was. And the thing was, Clay knew it.” The older man studied Johnny. “Not all people do. Some can’t see what’s right in front of them.”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
THE rest of the week had gone by fast, and Johnny had spent a lot more time with Jess than he needed to think about. He’d been with her most evenings, and that included Brady, too. People were thinking of them as a couple. A family.
Something he didn’t know how to change. The longer he’d stayed, the more intertwined in their lives he’d gotten and the more they would be hurt when he left.
And sooner or later, he had to leave.
He walked Storm out of the barn and into the corral. He mounted the animal and rode around the arena. With the way the stallion’s progress kept going forward, he knew his days here were numbered. He’d already been getting calls from a potential client, Ted Ransen, from Ransen Stables in Florida.
He’d get a substantial bonus if he could get there in a week. But money wasn’t the draw for Johnny. He didn’t have the Calhoun wealth, but he’d invested wisely over the years. Enough so he didn’t have to worry about going broke. If he took the job, that meant he had to leave for the sunshine state soon. He still had to think about it.
He shook away the thought. “How about a run, fella?” He rubbed Storm’s neck and started out of the corral. Randy opened the gate and they took off through the pasture. The canter quickly changed into a gallop over the open fields.
Johnny leaned down close to the horse’s neck. “That’s it, boy, run for it. You’ve earned it.” The animal’s long graceful strides took them over the field and across the stream.
Johnny smiled. No wonder Clay had wanted this animal—he was magnificent. And the way things were going this horse should sire beautiful, spirited foals.
He circled around and brought the horse back. He slowed at the creek, then came to a stop and climbed off. He let the horse get a drink of water.
Over the past three and a half weeks he’d become attached to this stallion.
“You’re such a good boy.” He stroked the shiny black coat. “You miss your old buddy, huh? Well, I know a little boy who can’t wait to step into the job as your friend.” He would miss this magnificent animal, too.
Storm bobbed his head and Johnny climbed back on and wheeled the horse around. “Come on, fella, we better head back home.” It struck him how easily he spoke that word.
A sense of comfort overtook him as he thought about the big old house, the people who filled it. The men he worked with at the Double Bar C. His chest tightened with familiar longing. Deep down he’d always wanted a place where he felt he could belong. But he learned a long time ago that just because he wanted something didn’t mean he got it.
* * *
Jess had seen Johnny take off on Storm about thirty minutes ago and he hadn’t returned. This was the first time the horse had been out of the corral since the day he’d run off.
She was a little worried.
What if Johnny had gotten thrown? He could be out there hurt. She started for the barn to saddle up Goldie when she saw the rider and horse coming over the rise.
She had to stop and watch. The man and animal were a sight to see. They were so in sync in their movements. So graceful it took her breath away. Johnny slowed as they reached the corral and she went to him as he dismounted.
“Hey, I didn’t realize you were headed out.”
Johnny walked the lathered horse toward the barn. “It was a last-minute decision.”
“I was worried. I mean, Storm hasn’t been out of the corral.”
Johnny gave her a sideways glance as he took the reins and walked toward the barn. “I thought you hired me because of my expertise. I know when a horse is ready. In fact, Storm is past ready.”
“He is?”
He stopped and turned to her. “Come on, Jess. We both have seen how well behaved Storm is around people now. The only decision you and Holt have left is if you’re going to keep him as a stud.”
She was a little hurt by his distant manner. “I’m not going to make that decision until my brother returns.”
Johnny shook his head. “You keep saying that, but this ranch is partly yours. You care about this horse. He’d been abused, Jess. Gelding him would naturally make him calmer.” He shrugged. “You could wait a year or so, long enough to sire a foal or two to continue the bloodline.”
This was the last thing she wanted to talk about with Johnny.
“I’ll speak to your brother if you want,” Johnny said. “I see how attached Brady is to Storm, and for the future, a gelded horse would be a much better mount for the boy.”
“I agree.” She finally smiled. She liked how well he fit into her life.
Jess watched as Johnny led the stallion into the barn. Was he trying to put space between them? She felt an urge to run after him and try to convince him how good they were together. But she knew she couldn’t do it. Even though she knew Johnny Jameson would leave, that didn’t mean she had to be happy about it.
* * *
Johnny sat at the big kitchen table enjoying the warmth of the roaring fire and Nancy’s meat loaf. He knew he had to cherish these memories and enjoy his time left here. Brady entertained them with silly things. Tonight, though, Johnny couldn’t get comfortable in the cozy setting.
He glanced at Jess, who was watching him. She probably could see his restlessness. He was feeling restless; he wanted to make it to the rodeo in a few days, then he’d decide it would be time to move on.
The meal had concluded, and Johnny planned a quick good-night before he went back to his place. Then Brady asked him to carry him upstairs to bed. He couldn’t deny the boy.
“You excited about Saturday?” Johnny asked.
A pajamas-clad Brady lay back against the pillow. Jess had already gone downstairs, so it was just the two of them. “I don’t know.”
Johnny sat down on the mattress. “Hey, what’s up, kid?”
“Tucker Carson keeps saying I’m not gonna win.”
Tucker was doing a job on Brady. “I think Tucker is the one who’s worried about the competition.”
The boy wrinkled his nose. “What competition?”
“You. Tucker is worried you’re so good you’ll beat him. He’s trying to make you
worry, and that’s not playing fair. So you go out there and try your best. That’s all you can do. Win or lose, you give it your all.”
Brady grinned. “I can try really hard. Thanks, Johnny.” He hugged him. “I love you.”
The words froze Johnny on the spot, but then he realized he was feeling the same way about the kid. “I care about you, too, Brady.”
The boy pulled back and looked him in the eye. “You know what I wish? I wish you were my dad.”
* * *
Two minutes later, Johnny nearly ran from the house as the boy’s words echoed in his head. Once outside, he drew the cold air into his lungs, but the tightness in his chest didn’t ease as he walked to the barn.
Love. No, he couldn’t do love. He’d tried it before and it hadn’t worked. He would only hurt Jess when he messed up. She’d already settled for one louse in her life, she didn’t need another man running out on her. He cared about her too much for that.
Damn. He rubbed his hand over his face.
He reached Storm’s stall. The top part of the gate had been left open so the stallion could be more social with the other horses. Funny, this was where Johnny felt most comfortable. He always had. Horses hadn’t rejected him like people. Animals accepted him with all his moods and faults. He walked up to Storm and he was greeted with a friendly nuzzle.
“Hey, buddy.” He stroked the beautiful animal. “I’m going to miss you.”
The horse blew a long breath through his nostrils.
Johnny smiled. He wished everything was this simple. He heard his name and turned to see Jess.
She didn’t look happy. “Is there a reason you left so quickly?”
He didn’t want to look at her. She made him ache for the things he wanted but couldn’t have. A place to belong, to fit in.
“I was tired. And I got a phone call I had to return.” That was a lie. He’d taken care of the call earlier.
She didn’t look convinced. “Johnny, you don’t have to sneak off to get time by yourself.”
He glanced away. “It’s not that, Jess.” He knew he had to face her. He owed her that much. “I see Brady getting more and more attached. And I can’t give him what he needs.”
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