by Tina Martin
“So you didn’t think I was going to kidnap Roman?” I laughed, and so did Sean.
“Nah, I trust you.”
“I’m joking, Sean.”
“Oh.”
Sean took his keys out of the ignition, then walked back to the house with me. We sat on the couch in the family room and talked…really talked…and I enjoyed the cool, laid-back Sean Beauvais. The more he disclosed about himself, the more I wanted to know. There was something mysterious about him and I wanted to know what it was.
Chapter 11 - The Dream
“AHHHHH!” I screamed to the top of my lungs at 1:49 a.m. to be exact. It happened again. That dream. That stupid dream. Keisha was the only person that knew about the strange dreams I’d been having, and when I told her, she said I needed to seek some professional help. I’d been having this same dream on and off for the past five years about my ex, Cornelius Hill.
We broke up after we were together a little over a year. Well, actually, he left me. I thought I would eventually get over him, and I was doing a good job of it until this dream. And each dream was always the same. I’m dating a man, someone new, and we’re walking hand-in-hand by the lake under a perfect sky. Then, all of a sudden, the sky turns pitch black. My date turns and faces me and peels his face off like a mask. Blood is flying everywhere, as he screams in anguish. Then it pours down rain for ten seconds. When the rain stops, all the blood is completely washed away. I look at my date again and it’s Cornelius. He doesn’t say a word. Just stands there with those light brown eyes staring at me. He drops to his knees and kisses my stomach. Then he starts crying, louder and louder. He screams in agony, “Why, Monica? Why?” while still on his knees. He then takes out a pocketknife, flicks the blade open, and points it towards my stomach like he’s going to cut me. That’s usually when I wake up.
Some people say dreams mean something. I used to believe that, too, but rational thinking forced me to see dreams as just something our minds do to pass time while we’re sleeping. But if dreams didn’t mean anything, why is it that I kept having the same one over and over again? So, I tried to make some sense of it for my own sanity. I took part of it to mean that no matter what man I was with, I would never forget Cornelius. It was the part about the knife that I don’t understand.
I took a deep breath as I sat straight up in the bed, tears in my eyes, hair flying everywhere, and my nightgown drenched with my own sweat. I sure hope Sean didn’t hear me scream. The last thing I needed is for him to see me like this – a hot mess. My heart was pounding, racing, beating abnormally as it usually did after this dream. I was almost breathless and needed some water…and fast.
I tiptoed down the hallway to the stairs and quietly made my way to the kitchen for a bottle of Fiji, drinking it as if I’d just spent the night in the desert. It must’ve taken me only a few seconds to drink the first bottle and then I opened another one, turning it up to my mouth quickly.
“I thought I heard you come down here.”
Startled, I spit the water out of my mouth. And here I am thinking no one heard me come down. I was as quiet as a mouse, or so I thought. I didn’t want to turn around and face him – didn’t want him to see me like this, but he walked closer to me.
“Monica.” When I turned around, he frowned, looking concerned. “What’s wrong with you?”
Women. I don’t know why we’re so emotional, but I cried like a baby when he asked me that.
“C’mon. Let’s go sit down,” he said, putting his arm around me. He walked with me into the family room and sat with me on the couch. He removed his black, cotton robe and spread it over me like a blanket. “What’s going on?”
I sniffled a couple of times. “I just had a bad dream. I’m fine. I’m fine,” I replied, not wanting to go into detail about the dream. “I just want to go back to bed.” I wiped my eyes and tried my hardest to stop crying. “I’m so sorry, Sean. I didn’t mean to wake you,” I apologized and went to stand up, but Sean pulled me back down.
“Monica, I don’t want you going back upstairs like this. I’ll sit with you in here, ah’ight?”
After I sat back down and he covered me with his robe again, I rested my head up against his chest. He had both arms completely around me, hugging me, comforting me, making me feel like he was there for me. I appreciated the fact that he cared, and I felt so comfortable in his arms that I fell asleep.
I woke up around six the next morning still on the couch with Sean. I got up, showered, and walked along the Milwaukee lakefront to inhale the fresh morning air. After the night I had, I needed it. When I returned, Sean, Warren, and Roman were sitting at the kitchen table like every other morning. Roman was eating Honey Nut Cheerios.
“Hey, Mommy.”
“Good morning, sweetie. Good morning, everyone.”
“Hey, Monica. How are you doing this morning?” Warren asked.
“I’m doing good,” I replied, while reaching in the fridge for a bottle of water and wondering if Sean had told him about what happened last night.
“I guess you didn’t see me sitting here, huh?” Sean asked.
“Yeah, just like you didn’t see me walk in the room, right?” Sean smiled and I smiled back at him. Warren peeped the way we went back and forth with each other, then he smiled.
“So what are your plans for today?” Sean probed.
“I’m going shopping with Keisha. I don’t know when I’m going to be back.”
“Ah’ight.”
“Why? Do you need something?”
“Nah, I’m straight.”
He must have wanted something. Why else would he want to know what my plans were?
I went upstairs, changed into a cute, flimsy, spaghetti strap, pink dress and some white flip-flops with a white tote bag. When I came downstairs, Sean looked at me, giving me the same double-take women would usually give him. He’d never really seen me with my hair down, but if wearing my hair down made me look this cute, then maybe I should wear it this way all of the time. Dude couldn’t take his eyes off of me.
I waved bye to everyone, kissed Roman on the cheek, and was out the door.
I met Keisha at The Cheesecake Factory near Mayfair Mall. When I walked in, she was sitting at a booth, peering at the lunch specials section of the menu, while going to town on a slice of white chocolate, peanut butter truffle cheesecake.
“Girl, how you gonna eat dessert before eating your lunch?”
“You know I had to do it. I’ve been waiting all week for this,” she said in between desperate chews and heavy breathing. “Mmm…this cheesecake is da bomb.” Keisha shoved another fork full into her mouth. “So how’s life in the Beauvais castle?” she mumbled, while catching eye shots of the menu.
“It’s okay.” I tried to conceal my smile, but it peered through like the sun behind a thick cloud.
“Just okay?” She peeped around the menu. “By that smile on your face, I would think that things were going great.”
“Well, it has its ups and downs, but I’m starting to like it.”
“And by it, you mean him. And by him, I mean Sean.”
I giggled and motioned for the waitress. “Girl, I’m not going to lie. The man is fine. He’s always walking around the house with his shirt off. I’m telling you, it ought to be a crime to be that fine.” We both laughed.
After the waitress walked away to enter our orders, Keisha picked up where she left off.
“So you like him, huh? Look at you.” She grinned at me. “This is not the Monica I know. The Monica I know used to hate Sean Beauvais.”
“Well, I guess once you really get to know people, you stop judging them and accept them for who they are.”
“And who is he?”
“He’s a man that is trying to raise his son by himself.” I took a sip of water. “And did I mention that he was fine?” We laughed together again.
“Yeah, several times. How old is he anyway?”
“I think he’s like thirty-two or somewhere around there.
He’s about the same age as Daryl’s older brother, right?”
“Oh yeah, that’s right. But Sean looks younger than thirty-two.”
“Yeah, I was surprised when I found out. And guess what else?”
“What?”
“You know he has two brothers, right?”
“Yep.”
“But did you know they were triplets?” I bit a piece of the complimentary bread the waitress brought over while I watched Keisha’s bottom lip drop.
“Get out.”
“Nah, I’m serious. He’s a triplet. Not identical, though, but they really look alike. They all look good, girl.”
“I’m sure they do.” Keisha took another taste of her half-eaten cheesecake. “So would you date Sean?”
“Noooo. He’s way too old and experienced for me, if you know what I mean.”
“Ay girl, ain’t nothing wrong with a little bit of experience, you know.” We laughed again. “By the way, do you know who Sean reminds me of?”
“Who?”
“Your old boyfriend from high school. What was his name?” Keisha started snapping her fingers like the movement was going to help her remember.
“Cornelius?”
“Yeaaah, corny Cornelius.”
“Really?” It was ironic that I just had a dream about Cornelius and Keisha turns around and brings him up in a general conversation. Cornelius was about the same height as Sean, but that’s about it. “Why did you always call him corny, anyway?”
“Because he always dressed like Carlton Banks from the Fresh Prince of Bel Air.” We both laughed again.
“I really loved him, ya know?”
“Who? Carlton Banks?”
“No, silly…Cornelius. I loved him. I still do.”
“So that explains why you haven’t had a man since…how long has it been?”
“Whatever.”
“Nah, for real, though. There hasn’t been a man in your life after Mr. Cornelius, has there?”
“Well, I kinda thought Cornelius and I would be together forever. Maybe we would have been if I didn’t get pregnant.”
“Who knows? Maybe you would have, but people’s lives take so many turns these days that you never know.”
“Yeah, I know. It’s just that I have never been able to get completely over him. Sometimes when I’m alone in bed, I just lie there and cry, wishing Cornelius and I were together again. I don’t know if I can ever get over him. I’m completely in love with a man who left me.” I took the cloth napkin from my lap and dabbed my eyes.
“It wasn’t that cut and dry, Monica.”
“I know it wasn’t. I need to move on, but how can I when I’m stuck on Cornelius?”
“Well, you won’t go see a therapist…”
“Nah. Never that.”
“And talking to your mom is out of the question, right?”
“Definitely!”
“Then why don’t you keep a journal or something? What you do is write something down in it whenever you think about Cornelius, then when it gets full, we’ll bury it.”
“Are you kidding me?”
“Nah, I’m for real, girl. People say that mess works.”
“Okay. I’ll take your word for it. I’ll try anything right about now.”
“Give it a try. It can’t hurt anything.”
AROUND FIVE O’CLOCK, I arrived back home to an empty house. No boys, no noise, just peace and quiet. Man, it felt good to have the whole house to myself. I thought about getting in Sean’s Jacuzzi, but he would probably flip out if he caught me in there. So, I went into my bathroom to soak in the bathtub.
“Ahh, this is the life,” I said quietly to myself.
I lit lavender aromatherapy candles and placed them around the tub, about six of them. Then I added some Amber Romance bubble bath and shuffled the water until it had enough bubbles for me. I adjusted my iPod to my favorite song as I slid the headphones on. Though it was summer, I still preferred my water extra hot. It relaxed me.
I was lost in my huge bathtub singing Say Yes by Floetry. Not only was the water comfortable, but the sound of Floetry had me in another world. As far as I was concerned, I was drifting off the coast of a Brazilian tropical beach waiting for someone to bring me a margarita that was so big, I could sip off of it for days.
A tap on my shoulder sent a shock through my body. No one was supposed to be in my bathroom but me. When I opened my eyes, there stood Sean looking at me. Un-freakin-believable.
“Sean, what are you doing in here?” I yelled. Who knew how long he had been standing there. Right away, I made sure a thick blanket of bubbles covered my body.
“I just wanted to let you know I was home.”
I sat there trying to regain my composure in the uncomfortable situation – me naked in the bath, while Sean hovered over me like he wanted to dive in with me. He wasn’t in a hurry to leave either. He just stood there in his jeans, no shirt or shoes.
“I didn’t mean to scare you. I’ll get out of your hair now.” He turned around and walked off.
I stepped out of the bathtub with an elevated heart rate. I was so frazzled, I felt dizzy. I grabbed a towel quickly and made sure that my goods were covered up. Then I dried off and put on a satin burgundy pajama set with my hair balled up in a ponytail before going to Sean’s room. When I walked in, he was lying on his king-sized bed with the lights off, watching TV. The little bit of moonlight that beamed down on him from the skylights in the ceiling gave the room a romantic feel.
“Hey, Sean.”
“Oh, hey.”
“What are you watching?”
“Nothing really. I’m just sitting here…and turned the TV on for sound.”
“Oh.”
“You can sit down if you want,” Sean said, while patting the bed.
I sat on the opposite end, not wanting to sit too close to him. A man that fine is tempting from far away. There was no telling what would happen if we got too close.
“So you like Floetry, huh?” he asked, grinning.
“Yeah, I love their music. And just how long were you standing there watching me?”
“Not long at all,” Sean responded. Then he laughed and started singing, “You make me so, so, so,” imitating me.
I couldn’t help but laugh and throw a pillow at him. “Okay. I’m going to bed.”
“Nah, don’t go. I’m just playing with you.” When I sat back down, he said, “For real, though, wassup?”
“Just wanted to know if you and Roman had fun today?”
“Yeah. I took him to the basketball court.”
“Oh really. I know he loved that, huh?”
“Yeah, he did.” Sean placed both of his hands behind his head and let out a deep sigh. “He showed me a thing or two…said you taught him a little.”
I laughed. I didn’t know much about basketball, but I did show Roman a few moves I learned from high school physical education classes.
“I was trying to show him how to dribble a while back. He actually got pretty good at it. He’s a fast learner.”
“You know, he adores you,” he added, then looked at me for my reaction. I simply smiled. “I’m serious. When he was in your class, he told me about the necklace.”
“He did?”
“Yep.”
“Wow…I remember that. I’m just surprised that he told you.”
“Yeah, he told me all about it. That was very nice of you to do that for him.” Sean was highly appreciative it seemed.
I tried to remain modest. “It’s all a part of the job. And he was so frightened, I had to do something.”
“Did you know he sleeps with that necklace under his pillow?”
“You’re kidding.”
“Nope. If you go in his room right now, I guarantee you it’s under his pillow. So, I hope you don’t think you’re getting it back.” Sean smiled.
“Nah, I don’t want it back. He can have it. I gave it to him.”
“Where did you get it?”
&nb
sp; “Ah…I don’t remember where I got it exactly. Why you want to know?”
“I could buy you a replacement.”
“Oh, no, that’s okay, Sean.”
“There was a ring on the necklace and it looked pretty expensive. I would be happy to replace it for you.”
“Oh…the ring. That ring was given to me a long time ago.”
“Your man gave you that?”
“Yeah.”
“And you just gave it away? It must not have had any sentimental value.”
“Just the opposite. It has a lot of sentimental value. That ring represents the one man that has ever loved me. I gave it to Roman so he wouldn’t be afraid. It worked, so I’m happy. I don’t want it back. It’s his now.”
“You know, I’ve never seen him so attached to someone like he is to you. Even with Shanelle, he wasn’t this close. But looking back, I see now that was mostly her fault.” Sean was quiet for a moment, taking the time to collect his thoughts. “I don’t know what I’m going to do when you leave?’
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, my son treats you like you’re his mother and you’re not even going to be here long enough to see his next birthday.”
“I guess we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.” Yawning, I stretched my hands high up in the air. “I’m getting tired. I’m going to bed.” I stood up, stretching again.
“Hey, before you go, can I have a hug?”
Sean never asked me for a hug before. That was quite surprising, though I didn’t mind at all.
He walked over to me and then did something that blew my mind. He removed my hair clamp and let my hair fall down my back. Next, he pressed my head against his chest. With his one hand on my neck and the other slowly stroking my hair, I put my arms around him.
“Goodnight, Monica,” he said, but didn’t release me.
I could feel the moment when his heart rate increased, his breathing became faster, and he gripped me tighter as if he didn’t want me to go.