by Ilona Fridl
“You don’t have to leave yet, do you?”
Marcy pointed to the newspaper. “The band is signing autographs at Music World right now. Come on, or we’ll be late!” Teri stood there, unmoving, so Marcy grabbed her arm. “Come on, Mom!”
Do I want to do this? Numb, she took a couple of suitcases in hand and locked the door behind her.
The crowd was beginning to thin out when they reached Music World. It was fifteen minutes to closing. Marcy and Teri walked into the store and stood behind a group of people. She saw the band at a desk still signing a few autographs. After thirty years, of course, they’ve aged. Roy had white hair, and Luke had aged well, but he had a rugged look. John’s hair was very short and she didn’t recognize him at first. There at the end of the desk sat Tim. Her heart skipped a beat, and those old feelings welled up in her. I haven’t stopped loving him. Just remember how he walked out on you. Outside of short, thinner, gray hair, he was still very handsome. Teri glanced at her own image in the security mirror. She saw a woman with a fairly nice figure and short gray hair with red streaks. In fact, David had given her the nickname of “Rusty” before he died. Teri turned her attention to the band members. John looked up and nudged Tim. She smiled when she noticed they were looking in Marcy’s direction. Of course. Her daughter resembled Teri at that age. She walked beside her daughter and put a hand on Marcy’s shoulder. As Teri waved, Tim’s reaction was startling―he jumped up and grabbed Teri in an embrace.
“Teri! Oh, my god! Teri!” he shouted. He turned to the manager. “Can we borrow your office?” The surprised man motioned them in.
Teri’s emotions ran rampant. She wondered if she should open the door she’d shut so long ago. Should she open old wounds? But how wonderful to be held in his arms again. I can’t look him in the eyes or I’ll be lost. Teri said firmly, “I’m glad we got the chance to finally say goodbye.”
“Goodbye? Teri, I just found you again. Don’t say goodbye! Are you still married?”
“David died last year. I have three children, and Marcy, who is with me today, is the youngest. She’s on her way to college this evening. How about you?”
“Married twice, divorced twice. I have a son who is estranged from me and a daughter I’m raising. Teri, did you love David?”
“He was a good man. He loved me very much and I loved him, too.” But he wasn’t you.
“Teri, why didn’t you wait for me? I promised you I’d find you when I returned, and I told you I loved you. I don’t say that unless I mean it. When I came back and found you were married, that was a pain I can’t describe.”
This was something she hadn’t considered before. “I went through hell when you left. I got more and more involved with drugs and liquor, and after Carol died, I nearly killed myself. I haven’t touched that stuff since. How about you?”
“I’ve been clean and sober for twelve years.”
“When I got out of the hospital after detox, I saw a newspaper column about you dating a German girl, and it said you might be engaged. Are you telling me you didn’t have sex when you were on tour?”
“I wasn’t strong enough to resist it, so, yes, I did, but I was never serious about any of those girls. You can’t say you didn’t have sex while I was gone, can you?” He gazed at her steadily.
Teri lowered her eyes. “No, I can’t, not in the drug scene.” She sighed deeply. “It’s been good to see you again. Goodbye, Tim.”
“One kiss first. Please?”
Teri hesitated, then gave in, and the kiss was electric. She felt it all the way down to her toes. David never did that to me. Their bodies were blending into one when she broke away. “I have to go.” She rushed out to where Marcy waited. “Come on. Let’s go.”
Tim was right behind her. “Teri, please wait.” He wrote something on a piece of paper. “I put the name of our hotel, and the room phone number, if you change your mind. I’ll be in town for two days.” He put his hand on her cheek. “You felt that kiss as much as I did.”
Marcy put out her hand to Tim. “I’m Marcy Kelsey, Teri’s daughter. Pleased to meet you, Mr. Olson.”
Tim took her hand and his eyes misted. “You look just like your mother.” He turned to Teri. “Kelsey is your last name?”
Teri nodded. Then she did what she had been avoiding and looked deep into his eyes. A strong wave of love and tenderness came over her. She became lost in those beautiful green eyes. Reaching up, she caressed his cheek, wiping a tear away. Suddenly, the pain she’d felt after he left returned, but she realized Marcy was watching intently. “Marcy, come on. Let’s go,” she said with a rasp.
“But, Mom…”
“Let’s go!” They dashed out of the store and went home in silence.
Marcy pulled her old red Mustang into the driveway, and they got out of the car and sat on the low wall next to the house. “Mom, you know I loved Daddy very much and I still miss him.”
Teri nodded.
Marcy looked her straight in the eye. “But I never saw you and Daddy look at each other like you and Tim did. You never forgave Tim for leaving you to go on that tour, did you?”
“I guess not.”
“Don’t be a fool, Mother, forgive him. Most people only dream of a love like that.”
“He did say I hurt him badly when I didn’t wait for him.”
“That’s what I mean. Mom, you shouldn’t go on hurting each other. Call him and give him another chance. Forgive him.”
“I’ll think about it. You’d better get going.” They hugged and kissed goodbye, and then Marcy got back in her car.
“Mom, you’ve got a second chance. Don’t blow it! Besides,” Marcy said with a wicked grin, “it would be way cool to have a rock star as a stepfather.”
Teri smiled and smacked the side of the car. “Get out of here!” She watched her youngest drive off down the street.
Unlocking the door, she went into the now-empty house. She put her purse on the sofa and got another cup of coffee. Sitting down, she set her cup on the coffee table and stared out the picture window at the desert and the mountains.
Teri knew how she had yearned to be at the top of the food chain. No parents telling her what to do, no husband to come to a compromise with, and no more children to take care of. Even her job in real estate was flexible. She could work when she wanted.
Taking a sip of the coffee, Teri sat back and gazed outside. As she looked, desert and mountains dissolved and she found herself by another window a lifetime ago, looking out over the lights of Los Angeles. Talk to me, Teri, what should I do? She felt a tug at her heart. Tim was as hurt by me as I was by him, but he seems to want me back. He can forgive me. Can I forgive him? Talk to me, Teri. She felt another tug. Then she heard Marcy’s voice: Don’t blow your second chance. All of a sudden, being on top of the food chain seemed more lonely than she wanted to be. Teri could still feel Tim’s kiss.
Glancing at her purse, she saw a piece of paper had fallen out. Teri opened it and read, To my Iris Rainbow, I still love you. I’ll be waiting for your call. Tim. There was the name of the hotel, with the room number at the bottom. She stared at the piece of paper for a moment. There’s one more person I owe an apology to. She pulled her cell phone from her purse, but a second later, put it back.
****
Tim slid into the sleek black limo taking them to the hotel and stared bleakly out the window as the others piled in. John turned to him. “Well, do you think Teri will call?”
Tim shook his head sadly. “So much time has gone by, I don’t know if she feels the same about me.”
Luke clapped him on the shoulder. “I wish my wife had stayed that good-looking. Teri is still beautiful for her age.”
Roy laughed. “Spoken like a true insensitive male. Well, Tim, it’s five o’clock now. We have three hours until the show. Good luck.”
The limo rolled into the parking lot, and the four friends went to their respective rooms. On the way, Tim gave Teri’s name to the desk and told them he
wanted any call from her to be put through immediately. An hour went by as Tim tried to take his mind off the silent telephone. He’d just decided it was time to get ready for the show when he heard the ring. Closing his eyes with a silent prayer, he picked up the receiver. “Hello?”
“Hello, Tim. This is Teri, and I wanted to apologize for the way I acted this afternoon. I didn’t want your visit to Tucson to end on a sour note.”
Tim almost sobbed. “Please forgive me for everything. If I hadn’t been so stupid in my youth, we would’ve been together all these years. Of course, I forgive you.”
Teri was silent for a moment. “Tim, open your door.”
“Why?”
“I want to see you.”
He flew across the room and opened the door. Teri stood there, cell phone in hand, and then she slowly turned it off and put it in her purse. Tim held out his arm, she took it, and he escorted her inside, closing the door behind her.
Chapter 17
The love she had for him welled up. It was like a dam breaking and overflowing. They stood in a deep kiss and embrace, two halves finally completing each other.
Tim started to unbutton his shirt and Teri stopped him with her hand. “Allow me,” she said, slowly undressing him. “I remember what you like.” She rubbed his chest and stomach, down to his erection.
As Teri’s clothes fell away, he kissed each breast tenderly. “You are still incredibly beautiful, baby.” He swept her up into his arms and carried her to the bed.
“Let me feel you inside me again,” she half-sobbed, and he entered her, stroking to the depths. After they both came in a massive orgasm, they lay embraced for some time, sobbing in each other’s arms.
Tim glanced at the clock. “I have to get ready for the concert. Teri, you were my first love and my last. I want you forever to be mine and to stand with me. Marry me, please?”
Teri thought of that warm night in the trailer at the music festival, when Tim had first opened her, and the intervening years fell away. Love that is eternal will not be denied. She gazed at him through her tears, seeing the humor in the fact he proposed while lying naked on top of her, buried deep. She laughed and cried. “From the position I’m in, how could I possibly say no?” Her voice cracked as she put her arms around his shoulders, and he kissed her tenderly.
When they were dressed and headed to the door, Tim held out his hand. “You’re going with me. I’m not letting you go again.”
Teri kissed him. “I’m not going anywhere, mister, except with you.”
They went out the door arm in arm, and waiting in the hallway were John, Luke, and Roy.
John held his arms out. “Welcome back, Teri. Somehow I knew you couldn’t stay away. It’s good to see you again,” he said, hugging her.
She went to Roy next. “It’s good to see you too, Roy.”
“Been a long time.”
She turned to Luke, then stopped, and Luke smiled sheepishly. “I won’t try to rape you, I promise.” Teri hugged him, too. “But can I have a date?”
Teri patted him on the cheek. “I told you a long time ago I wasn’t interested.”
“Anyway, we’re engaged,” Tim said as he drew her back.
John laughed. “That didn’t take you long. Congratulations, you two.”
“Just thirty years,” Tim replied. “Thank you.” The others shook his hand and hugged Teri again.
John started moving them toward the elevator. “Come on, the limo’s waiting.”
Tim took Teri by the shoulders. “Are you coming to the theater?”
“I didn’t buy a ticket.”
“I’ll talk to our manager. I’m sure he can arrange something. I want you with me.”
She went down with them to meet their manager, Kevin Powers, and the entourage in the lobby. Tim went directly to Kevin, with Teri right behind.
“Kevin, this is Teri Kelsey, my fiancée. Can you get Teri on the backstage guest list? I’d like to get her a seat in the theater, too. Can you arrange it on your cell phone?”
Kevin looked at him with his mouth open. “Fiancée? Why haven’t I seen her before? When did you meet?”
Tim smiled at Teri tenderly. “A long time ago, but we were apart for too long. I’m going to right that.”
Kevin sighed and shook his head. “Okay, Tim, I’ll take care of it. We’d better get in the limo.”
All the way to the theater, Teri’s inner voice kept chiding her. What’s the matter with you? You’re letting him get to you again. Haven’t you learned anything? She glanced at Tim, who beamed, his arm around her. Yes, I have. I found I still love him and can’t say no to him, so I said yes.
At the theater, they got out of the limo and were hustled into the backstage area. A young man, well dressed in a business suit, came up to Teri. “Are you Teri Kelsey?”
She said, “Yes.”
“I have a special seat for you. Will you follow me, please?”
Kevin came over. “I’ll arrange to let you backstage again. Come back before the last number, okay?”
Teri nodded and quickly kissed Tim. “Break a leg, love.”
She followed the young man into the theater to a front row seat toward the right of the stage.
The lights went down and the announcement came: “Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Virgin Ram!” A cheer went up, and Teri had the strangest feeling of déjà vu. She scanned the crowd, amazed. There were original fans, like herself, but there were many younger fans, as well.
She enjoyed the show and sang along with all the songs, as the whole audience did. It was like a big party. Then Tim took over the microphone. “Our next song is very special to me, because I wrote it for a very special girl. Those of you who have been fans from the start might remember the beautiful redhead I dated before we went on our first tour thirty years ago. I didn’t realize it then, but she was the love of my life, and we went our separate ways. Today, I found her again and she has agreed to be my wife.” A cheer came from the audience. “I dedicate this song to my Iris Rainbow. Here’s to you, babe. It’s called “Beloved.”
Teri dissolved into tears.
The next morning, Teri and Tim were blissfully entwined under the sheet with the early morning sun shining through the hotel window. Teri kissed him tenderly. “What time do you have to leave for the flight to Las Vegas? It’s eight o’clock now.”
Tim stretched and yawned. “Not until eleven-thirty.” He chuckled. “We’ve been acting like two teenagers instead of two middle-aged people.”
Something about that bothered her as she sat up in bed. Younger women were attracted to rock stars. Maybe he would find someone he liked better. I can’t compete with those supermodel types. “You know, you could have your pick of any younger woman. You don’t have to settle for me.”
“What are you talking about?” He eyed her with a puzzled expression.
“Look at me. I’m not the eighteen-year-old you fell in love with. I’ve got gray in my hair, cellulite in my thighs, and nipples that point straight to the ground. When you really see me, you won’t want me.” Tears came to her eyes. “I couldn’t take it if you walked out on me again.”
He sat up and moved around on the bed to face her. “I didn’t walk out on you. Anyway, take me. I have gray, thinning hair and droopy jowls. I’m aging too.” Tim got up on his knees and cupped her chin in both hands. “Teri, I’ve dated younger women. They’ve had great bodies, yes, but they didn’t have something very important.” He pointed his index finger between her eyes. “They didn’t have Teri inside. I’ve had a hole in my heart that didn’t heal until yesterday.” He took her in an embrace, cradling her body next to his. “You’re the only woman I want and need. I’ll never leave you.” He buried his face in her hair and sighed happily. After a few minutes, they got up and dressed.
As Tim was packing his suitcase, he glanced at Teri, who sat on the edge of the bed. “Teri, tell me, why do you think I walked out on you?”
She stared at her hands. “It wa
s something your old girlfriend told Carol and me.”
An angry edge passed over his eyes. “Dana? What did she tell you?”
“She said when you got tired of me, you would tell me you loved me and walk out forever. I was crushed when you left, because all she told me seemed to be true. I self-destructed in San Francisco, and when I came back, I saw news releases that showed you very close with that German girl, so I resigned myself that I’d lost you. Dana told Carol that John would do that to her, too.”
Tim whirled around. “Is that why Carol went with you to San Francisco?”
“Yes. She probably wouldn’t have gone if John had said something. Especially after Linda called Carol and told her Roy proposed.”
“Looks like Dana screwed up a lot of lives.” He closed the suitcase and sat next to her. “Dana is a very selfish woman who wants things all her way. She confessed a few of those things to me before the divorce.”
“Divorce?”
“She was my first wife, I’m ashamed to say. She found out where we lived by following us home from my parents. Remember when we had dinner over there? She followed you to work, too. Do you remember your co-worker, Barb?”
“The one who almost got me raped? Yes.”
“That was Dana’s younger sister, who owed her a favor.”
Suddenly Teri remembered something. “That must be the reason she didn’t want to meet you. You would’ve recognized her. Why did you marry Dana?”
“I was still in a blue funk after I returned from the tour and found you were married. I started dating Dana again on the rebound. Well…” He looked a little embarrassed. “When I was going with her before, she always practiced birth control, and I assumed she still did. I was wrong and she got pregnant. The band was on tour in Europe when I got an angry call from her. I promised to marry her when I got home, and believe me, that was the marriage made in hell. We got divorced two years later, and after that she turned my son against me. I haven’t seen him in years.”
“What happened with your daughter’s mother?”