by Kelly, Marie
My guy looked at me with a deep frown on his face.
“Yeah, it happened at a hotel there. How you know?”
I swear to God my fucking heart stopped beating and all my energy left my body.
Lock stood there looking at me like I was crazy as I fought to find my words because the shock and anger had left me speechless.
“Um, a friend of mine owns a hotel on that block. He had mentioned something about it.” I lied right through my fucking teeth, but I couldn’t tell him how I knew it was that day and in that exact location.
Some shit I shouldn’t have known, but I fucking did!
My jaw clenched, and my palms started to sweat profusely.
“Oh, okay. Yeah. It happened right on that block, but it’s all good. The hoe didn’t kill him, and it will only be a matter of time before the cops find her ass. Fucking bitch.”
That made my left eye twitch because my natural instinct was to snap his fucking neck for what slipped out of his mouth, but I had to give that to him. Had that been one of my people, she would have been all that and so much more.
I opened my mouth to respond, even though I had no idea what the fuck to say, but he cut me off when his cell started ringing.
“Oh, that’s my shorty. I gotta go, but it was good seeing you, Wrath. Take care, my brother.”
We slapped hands, and he walked away as he answered his phone.
I just stood there watching his back for a few seconds before my eyes landed on the gift I had just bought. Devastated wasn’t even the word to describe how I felt.
My feet slowly and weakly moved, and I allowed them to carry me to my car while my mind stayed in a daze. Somehow, I managed to drive my ass home without crashing because I couldn’t focus on shit.
When I made it inside my house, I went straight to my room.
The door opened to reveal Kanada singing and dancing as she changed the bed. We had just finished fucking the bed up before I left to surprise her with some gifts.
My eyes watched her as my heart burned with pain, anger, and regret. Emotions I had never felt when it came to her.
Kanada must have felt my eyes on her because she spun around to look at me.
“Hey, baby, you’re back quickly.” She smiled at me, and any other day that smile would have made my heart skip a beat, my body shudder, and my dick hard, but not today.
Today, all her smile did was send a stabbing pain into my chest and a floodgate of regrets flowing through my mind.
Why???
We were so great together. I had plans for her, but how could I be with someone who would lie to me?
I should have stayed fucking Brittany. I thought as I just stood there looking at her.
Her smile instantly dropped, and worry clouded her face.
“Alvaro, what’s wrong?”
She could look worried and play stupid all she wanted, but she did this, not me.
“How long did you think it would have been before I found out the truth?”
My question further confused her because her mouth opened and closed a few times.
I stepped further into the room, put the gift bag down on the floor, and closed the door behind me. Her eyes widened when I did that.
I would never put my hands on Kanada, even though my mind was telling me to choke her ass out, but she damn sure wasn’t getting out of this room without telling me the truth.
“What are you talking about, Alvaro?” Her voice was laced with fear.
“I’m going to ask you this one time, Kanada, and you better not lie to me. Do you understand?”
Slowly, her head nodded.
“What were you really doing the night I found TJ?”
Kanada Alton
Alvaro’s question made every drop of blood and breath leave my body, and I stood there frozen in fear, not knowing what to say.
The look in his eyes told me that nothing but the truth should come from me, and my fear told me not to. I was stuck. Stuck because I knew if he was asking me that question then he knew what I had told him was a lie.
But if he knew, why did he want me to tell him?
Or was he just checking to see?
Question after question rolled around in my head, and I didn’t know what to do. My heart was beating so fast I thought it was going to pop out of my chest.
My hands started to sweat, so I ran them down the front of the night shirt I was wearing.
I licked my dry lips and tried to swallow the lump in my throat. His eyes penetrated me as they compelled me to tell the truth, and they never left my fidgety body until I finally broke.
“I wasn’t in a bar looking for a job like I told you I was,” I spoke and dropped my head.
Alvaro took in a deep breath and slowly let it out.
“Where the fuck were you?”
His tone was angry, rigid, and full of contempt for me. Something I hadn’t experienced from him since the night he found TJ in my car. He was back to hating me, and it caused tears to rush to the forefront of my eyes. I looked up at him and gasped when I saw Wrath looking back at me and not Alvaro.
He had explained to me how he was the same person, yet so different. And from how black his eyes looked, I knew in my heart that I was looking at Wrath.
“I asked you where the fuck you were, Kanada, and don’t fucking lie to me. Tell me!”
My tears fell as my mouth opened.
“I’m sorry, Alvaro. I was scared to tell you the truth because I thought I killed someone.”
“Ahhhh fuck!” He growled in a frustrated manner.
“I was in a hotel with a guy. He said he would pay me, but when it came down to it, I couldn’t do it. But he tried to rape me, so I hit him over the head with a lamp. There was so much blood I thought I had killed him. I ran out, and that’s when I found you with TJ.”
After Nigel started feeling on me and kissing on me, I told him that I didn’t want to do it anymore, and I wanted to leave. He asked me how I was going to feed my son, but I told him I would figure it out. I knew I needed the money he was offering, but I wanted to find another way to get it.
When I tried to get up, he wouldn’t let me. He started trying to get my panties down, and we started to fight. He was a lot stronger than me and wouldn’t let me go. I panicked and grabbed the lamp beside the bed then hit him over the head. His body went limp, and blood poured from the gash in his head. I thought he was dead, so I ran out of that room after grabbing my duffle bag. And when I got to my car, Alvaro was standing there holding TJ.
I wanted to tell him the truth about that night so many times, but I was afraid to admit I had taken someone’s life.
I was afraid he would have kicked me out and wouldn’t want me to be in a house he kept his daughter in. And I was mostly afraid of him taking TJ away from me.
Alvaro had expressed that TJ would be better off without me when he thought I had left him alone in the car. What would he have thought knowing I had killed someone? It was a risk I wasn’t willing to take.
“Or was it because he wasn’t willing to pay the money you wanted?” he questioned in an accusing manner, and it had me wondering where he got that from.
“What? No! I didn’t want to go through with it, and he wouldn’t let me leave!”
“You told me you started robbing motherfuckers in Boston when your baby daddy forced you to work. Was that a fucking lie?”
“No! I wasn’t lying about that”
He scoffed.
“Are you sure? Because it’s funny how your ass came here, and that’s the first fucking thing you did!”
“Alvaro, he approached me in the mall. I was desperate.”
“Bullshit!”
“It’s not!”
“Man, I don’t believe that shit! You want me to believe he just so happened to approach you, knowing that’s what the fuck you been doing?” He laughed.
“That’s the truth, Alvaro,” I said just above a whisper.
“Is it, Kanada?” I looked up at
him. “You got me out here looking like a fucking fool, telling my people how much I trust you when you’ve been lying to me this whole time! You out here prostituting yourself.”
“I wasn’t prostituting myself! I made a wrong decision, but I couldn’t go through with it!”
My tears were coming fast and hard. I couldn’t wipe them away fast enough. Alvaro was looking at me like I was scum, and it was breaking my heart.
“Kanada, have you ever fucked for money?”
I gasped at his question, and he frowned.
“Wow!” he said when I couldn’t form my lips to answer him, and he angrily chuckled. “You have me raw dogging your ass. I wasn’t even fucking my baby mama raw like that!” His face frowned in disgust.
“It was once, Alvaro. The very first time I had a client. That’s what made me start to rob them because I couldn’t bring myself to do that again. He used a condom, but I got myself tested after.”
That was the truth, but I could see from his eyes and face that he didn’t believe me anyway.
“Damn, is your name even Kanada?”
The look he gave me had my chest hurting. He hated me, and it was killing me.
“Alvaro.” I stepped toward him, attempting to touch him, and he shook his head at me.
“Nah. I’m good.”
He didn’t even want me to touch him.
“I’m sorry, Alvaro.”
“Are you? Or are you sorry I found out the truth?”
“But it’s not what you think it is!”
I could see how he believed I came here to do what I was doing in Boston, but it wasn’t like that. Terrence made me do those things, and when I came here, I stupidly allowed the promise of money to lure me to a place I was running away from.
If I could go back to that night, I would. There wasn’t a day that went by when I didn’t regret that night. Regret leaving my son and regret even putting myself in that situation.
“I opened myself up to you like a fucking book, Kanada! There isn’t anything about me that you don’t know, so don’t tell me that it’s not what I think! You lied to me!” His hurt laced voice bounced off the ceilings and vibrated in my ears.
What he said caused me to drop my head in shame because he was right. There wasn’t anything Alvaro didn’t share with me. He told me everything, and we spoke about everything; he held nothing back.
“All the bad shit I had ever done, even that I shared with you, so don’t tell me no bullshit that you couldn’t tell me!” He continued to throw his pain my way, and I could do nothing but take it.
I allowed my shame and embarrassment to keep what happened away from him.
Tell him you were embarrassed! I inwardly shouted at myself.
My eyes lifted to look at Alvaro again, and he just stood there looking at me. Hurt and confusion was written all over his face.
I stood there pleading to him with my eyes. I wanted to touch him, talk to him, and explain. I wanted the chance to show him how sorry I was for lying to him. I wanted him to trust me again.
When he turned around and walked out of the room without saying anything else to me, all I could do was drop on the bed and cry my eyes out.
5
Alvaro ‘Wrath’ Ramsey
A Few Days Later
My head was fucking pounding after the drinks and weed I had used to drown out the thoughts that were circling my head since I found out that Kanada was lying to me.
That shit did something to me, and I was pissed at myself that I fell for her bullshit.
It had me wondering if everything she ever told me was all lies—if what we had was all lies.
There I was thinking long term shit with a chick I didn’t even fucking know! I already had shit going on around me that had me questioning everyone who crossed my path, and now this! At this point, I was realizing that I couldn’t trust anyone but my fucking family.
I sighed heavily and rubbed a hand down the back of my neck. This shit was fucking with me on a different level. I had to laugh as I remembered how Kanada was all in my face telling me not to judge her because she had left TJ alone in the car to get a job! She all had tears and shit coming down her face like what she was spitting was the got damn bible truth. She had even fed Ma that bullshit ass lie too. Had me apologizing for judging her when I was fucking right from the beginning.
SHE LEFT TJ ALONE TO FUCK WITH A NIGGA!
That was my first thought, and I’m mad at my damn self for allowing her beautiful eyed, perfect skinned, pouty lipped, thick bodied, lying ass to make me think otherwise.
“Damn!” I muttered as I felt my dick stand up. Even when I was mad at her, wanted to choke the life out of her ass, and cuss her out, my heart and dick still wanted her. I had foolishly allowed her to become a part of me—a part of my every day thinking and feelings, and now I was stuck feeling like a damn fiend going through withdrawals.
My mind was telling me to go choke her out while I drove my dick in her. The shit was crazy.
I needed to get her out of my system, and fast, which is why I was staying in my old condo that I used to fuck in before I got Brittany pregnant. The last thing on my mind was fucking; I just needed to be somewhere other than where Kanada was.
She had violated my one rule, and that was lying to me. I wasn’t one of those niggas who demanded a whole load of outlandish shit from their women—shit that they couldn’t follow themselves—but I had only one requirement, and that was never to lie to me.
I could deal with mistakes and shit like that, but not lying. There was something about lying that did something to me—made the beast in me emerge for two reasons.
One; the person thought I was a fool to play with. And two; they had other motives which meant they were trying to play me. Both of which I didn’t take kindly to.
Like I had told Kanada, I opened myself up to her like a fucking book. I even told her who I really was; I didn’t hold shit back! We even spoke about the night Brittany tried to fuck me. There wasn’t anything I kept from Kanada. In my mind, how could I be looking to spend my life with her and she didn’t know me?
But, I guess I was the only one who saw shit like that.
For now, all I knew was that I didn’t want to be around her, so I was going to keep my distance. She had called me nonstop for the first two nights that I didn’t go home, but I guess she got the hint that I didn’t want to talk to her because she stopped calling.
Ma had called, though, to make sure I was good, and she let me know that Kanada was moping around the house. Not that I gave a fuck. She did this shit to us, and I had no sympathy for motherfuckers who fucked up and then wanted to play the victim.
What Kanada should have been worried about was how if she didn’t have TJ I would have made her get the fuck up outta my house!
My cell started ringing, and I groaned because I didn’t want to talk to anyone. My temper was high, and I wasn’t with the shits, but business didn’t stop because one lying ass chick wanted to fuck me over.
Rolling on my side and slowly sitting up in the bed, I picked up my phone from the nightstand while I cut the lamp on.
My eyes grazed over the band aid I had on my arm from where I had gone to get tested. I was fucking pissed after finding out Kanada had fucked before for money, and I had been fucking her raw. She says it was once, but who knew—she lied before.
If I got anything, I’m killing her ass!
My eyes then landed on my ringing phone.
It was Surge calling me.
Little bro had been living his best life after getting with Dior. Little sis came through for us like a guardian angel, so I couldn’t even be mad. She had his back even when she knew I wanted him to kill her. Something I had to profusely apologize to her for. I was a man about mine, and when I was wrong, I had no problem apologizing. Dior deserved that and so much more.
Now, you couldn’t tell Surge shit. The nigga was all that and so much more with his girl by his side.
I chuckled when I reme
mbered Legion called him Hollywood now that he had a girl because the nigga stayed leaving our texts on read.
Shit, at least his love life is going right, I thought as I answered the phone.
“What’s good, bro?”
“We have a problem, Wrath. My baby mama house burned down, and they broke into my car.”
That was code for some bullshit I wasn’t ready for, and I sighed.
This was all I fucking needed, but at the same time, I needed a release of some kind. Fucking wasn’t gonna work for me because although I was now free to fuck Brittany or any other chick I wanted—since I knew I was done with Kanada—the problem was my dick craved her disloyal ass!
“Where you at?” I asked Surge and pushed thoughts of Kanada out of my mind.
“My baby mama house.” Which meant the warehouse, and I sighed again.
“Okay, I’m on my way.”
After I ended the call, I pinched the bridge of my nose and closed my eyes.
It was like people wanted to see Wrath, and since they were prodding the beast, I was going to give them what they wanted.
When I felt that vein bulge in my neck, I didn’t even try to calm myself down. I embraced my anger and allowed it to consume me.
I went black, and I felt sorry for anyone who crossed my path. Getting up off the bed, I went to handle my hygiene so that I could leave and see what was going on.
Forty minutes later, I pulled up at the warehouse—or what used to be the warehouse because it was now a pile of ash, and all I could do was laugh as I climbed out of my car.
My brothers were there along with Pac and his crew. They all turned to look at me as I doubled over laughing at the sight before me.
This warehouse was the one Surge used for our gun empire that brought in a lot of fucking money.
“Wrath, the trap in Manhattan was hit, and a shipment was stolen too,” Surge walked over to inform me, and all that did was make me laugh even harder.
I know they must have thought I was crazy, but right then, that was all I could fucking do.
Once I had that out of my system, I turned to look at them.