by HELEN HARDT
I was so unworthy. She was offering her love, and her body, and I was unworthy of both. But I didn’t have the strength to deny her. I would make love to her this last time, and then, I would tell her the truth.
Chapter Fourteen
Melanie
He kissed me then, the kiss I was craving. He forced his tongue between my lips and took, took all I had to give, and I gave it freely. I welcomed it. I wanted to give him all of me, everything that was left of me. If it was not meant to be for the future, I would deal with that eventually. But this was now. This was one moment—one I wanted to cherish.
Our tongues swirled together, both of our voices vibrating with hums of desire.
When we finally broke the kiss to both take much-needed breaths, he trailed his lips over to my ear, biting on my lobe and pushing his tongue inside.
“You’re so beautiful, Melanie. God, I want you so much.”
It wasn’t a confession of love, but desire, and I would take it. It was enough for now. He kissed my neck, and then my shoulders, tiny little nips, and he finally made it down to my nipples.
He sucked them. Hard.
Just the way I liked.
I groaned, my hips moving of their own accord, undulating beneath him. I longed to reach for his hard cock and free it from his jeans, but with my injured hands, I wasn’t sure if that would be a good idea.
I moaned as he continued to suck my nipples.
“Take off your clothes, Jonah. Please. I want to see your beautiful body. I want to feel your warm skin against mine.”
He let my nipple drop with a soft pop. He didn’t answer me, but stood and slowly began to undress. I opened my eyes to enjoy the show. He unbuttoned his fawn-colored western shirt, and with each new inch of tan skin exposed, my own skin prickled, my nipples hardened further, and I grew more slick between my legs. When his shirt finally ended up in a crumpled heap on the floor, I drank in his bronze chest, the black and silver hairs scattered over it, the dark disks and the nipples protruding from them. I gazed downward to the arrow of hair that led to the bulge beneath his jeans.
He slowly unbuckled his belt and then unsnapped and unzipped his jeans. He sat on the bed and took off his boots and socks and then stood again, lowering his jeans and boxers to the floor. His larger than large cock sprang out, and a gasp left my lips.
That was for me. That beautiful hardness. All for me. Simple, frugal Melanie Carmichael. This was what I did to him.
This was what I did to the magnificent Jonah Steel.
I let out a groan without realizing it.
His lips curved up at the corners. “My God, Melanie. My God.”
“You are absolutely gorgeous, Jonah. You’re perfect.”
“I’m far from perfect. Very far from it. But you… My God.”
He lay down next to me, the warmth of his naked body infusing through me. Tiny kisses rained over the shell of my ear.
“I’m burning for you, Melanie. I’m fucking burning.”
If he was indeed burning, why was he being so gentle with me? That was normally not a problem for Jonah Steel. Of course, I knew why. He was being a gentleman in the true sense of the word. I had been through hell, and he didn’t want to push too hard.
But right now I wanted him. All of him. Everything he could give to me, I wanted. I would take it without reservation. I needed to feel.
I turned to him and kissed him. Just like he’d kissed me before, taking everything I could from him, showing him what I wanted him to do to me.
When we both started panting, he pulled away. “You need to stop this. You don’t know what you’re doing to me.”
I turned his cheek, forcing him to look into my eyes. “I need you. I need everything from you, Jonah. Now.”
He pulled away again and sat on the edge of the bed. “No, you don’t.” He reached for his boxers on the floor.
“What are you doing?” I gasped. “You’re not thinking of leaving, are you?”
“I have to. Because if I don’t, and you ask me for that again, I might just give it to you.”
“Then give it to me.”
He turned and scorched me with his dark eyes. “You have no idea what I desire from you, Melanie. A little slap was just the beginning. And right now, after all you’ve just been through, you can’t take what I want from you.”
A sudden jolt of fear speared through me. This was the darkness that I had only glimpsed in Jonah before now—the darkness that burned within him, the darkness that I was not able to stay away from.
I wanted him. I wanted to give him everything I could. I was in love with him.
He had told me once that I would surrender to him eventually. At the time I had my doubts, but no longer.
But he had a point. I had just been through a traumatic experience, and this was my way of dealing with it at this moment. I wanted sex. I wanted orgasms. I wanted to shout to the rooftops that I was alive and well and had outsmarted the man who’d tried to kill me.
But was I ready for what Jonah wanted? I couldn’t even fathom what it was that he wanted. If it went beyond the occasional slap, could I truly surrender to him?
He was right.
Today was not the day to find out.
But I still needed him. Still needed him to make love to me.
I pulled him toward me. “I don’t want you to leave.”
“But if you ask me—”
I covered his lips up with two fingers. “I won’t. I won’t ask you for that. Not until I’m ready.”
“I’ve been ready, Melanie. I want you. It’s what I burn for. It’s what I desire more than anything. And one day maybe you’ll find out what I want. But not today.”
I nodded. “Would you still stay with me for a little while longer? Feeling you beside me gives me…comfort.”
He sighed then, his features softening, becoming less angular. “Yes, but I won’t be able to keep my hands off of you.”
“I don’t want you to.”
He lay back down beside me then and kissed me. Still a kiss of fire and passion, but slightly more tender this time. He was holding back. That much was obvious. But I didn’t force it this time. Because, as much as I knew that I wasn’t ready for what he had in mind, I had an inkling that he wasn’t ready for it either. At least not with me. This was something we would both have to grow into.
We kissed for a long time, and then he moved downward, kissing my breasts, sucking on my nipples hard, while he trailed his fingers over my vulva.
“You’re so wet for me, Melanie.” He smoothed his fingers through my slick folds. “So fucking wet. I want you so much right now.” He thrust two fingers inside my heat.
He slid down my body and softly licked my clit.
I writhed beneath his ministrations, my hips undulating, my breathing becoming rapid. As he tongued my most secret place, the convulsions started deep within my womb and radiated outward. Soon the climax overtook me, bubbling through me like hot lava.
“Jonah!” I cried out. “I’m coming. My God, I’m coming.”
“That’s right, baby,” he said against my patch of dark blond hair. “You come for me. Come all over my face. Drench me in that sweet cream of yours.”
I thrust upward into him, rubbing my pussy against his lips, his stubbly beard. I would no doubt have razor burn, but I didn’t care. It felt so good, and another orgasm took me on a flight to the moon.
When I finally came down, Jonah moved his body over mine, his hard cock pushing against my slick entrance.
“I need you, Melanie. I need you so much right now.”
“Then take me. Take me now.”
He plunged into my body, stretching me, the depths of my pussy accommodating him. So full I was, so full and complete.
He pulled out and thrust back in. “You feel so good. So fucking good around my cock.”
I had gotten used to Jonah’s graphic language during sex, and now turned me on.
“I love the way you fuck me. I love the way
you fuck my pussy.”
The words sounded foreign from my lips, but not foreign to my ears. My nipples tightened even further, and waves of pleasure began to ripple through me again. Those words—the dirty graphic words. They made me hot.
As my third climax took me to new heights, Jonah increased the speed of his thrusts, grinding into me, fucking me with wild abandon. And I loved it. Every single fucking moment of it.
“I’m about ready, baby,” he said, sweat dripping from his forehead onto my cheek. “I’m going to fill you up. Fill you all the way up. Make you mine. Mine.”
Mine. I loved the sound of that. Was it possible he felt the same way about me? Did he love me back?
I didn’t have time to contemplate the question because then he thrust so far into me that I thought he touched my soul. I came yet again, but it was different this time, like an explosion of warmth around my entire body, penetrating into my heart.
This was it.
This was what love felt like.
Surely he could feel it too.
He lay atop me for a few moments, and I welcomed the weight of his hard body. When he moved over to my side, I whimpered at the loss of his warmth.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I hope that wasn’t too rough for you.”
I shot my eyes open. “You weren’t rough at all. You’ve been way rougher other times.”
“But after what—”
“You gave me exactly what I needed, Jonah. You were right. I wasn’t ready for everything from you. But for a few minutes, I just wanted to escape what happened, and you gave me that. No one but you could’ve given me that.”
He chuckled. “I’m one of about a million men who would have been glad to fuck you.”
“Fuck me? Was this just a fuck to you?” I couldn’t believe he’d said the words.
He shook his head. “You’ve never been just a fuck to me Melanie.”
Thank God. Although I didn’t voice the thought. I stayed silent and snuggled up to his warm body. For a moment, I thought I felt a shudder running through him. But then it was gone.
I must have imagined it.
Chapter Fifteen
Jonah
I stopped my shaking, hopefully before Melanie had noticed. I didn’t want to give her any more cause for concern. She had enough to deal with now without worrying about me.
This woman meant so much to me. I couldn’t bear the thought of losing her, and I would lose her, as soon as I came clean about ignoring the phone call. But right now she needed me, and I would not let her go through this alone.
I needed to get back to Talon and talk to him about what he’d decided to do about Felicia. So many questions were still unanswered. But I couldn’t leave Melanie. If she woke up and I wasn’t in the house, she would freak, and rightly so.
I was exhausted, having been up all night in that uncomfortable chair. As much as I wanted to help Talon uncover the mystery of his past, right now I needed sleep. So did Melanie. Once she drifted off, I relaxed a little.
* * *
When I woke up, darkness had already fallen. I checked my watch. It was after nine p.m. I was disoriented at first and then realized I was in the guest room with Melanie. I reached next to me to touch her. But she was gone.
I got up, quickly put on my jeans, and walked out to the kitchen. There was Melanie, in my black silk robe, looking as luscious as anything, putzing around in the kitchen. I cleared my throat.
She looked up. “Hey, sleepyhead.”
“Sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry. I know you didn’t get any sleep last night. I wasn’t planning on waking you at all.”
“What are you up to?”
“Just fishing around for something to eat. I can’t believe I’m actually a little hungry. That’s a good sign. I mean, after my”—she paused—“abduction and all.”
I nodded. Undoubtedly, it was. “I’m not much use in the kitchen. I can have Marj come over and whip us up something.”
“Oh, don’t be silly. We’ll find something. Or we can order something.”
I couldn’t resist a chuckle at that one. “We’re over a half hour from a small town. No one delivers out here for takeout. Most places close by nine on weeknights.”
Her eyes widened. And I laughed again.
“This ain’t the city, honey.”
She joined me in laughter. Not her normal laughter, but still a happy sound. She was something else.
She opened the refrigerator door and then turned to me, her expression aghast. “I’m so sorry. I’m being kind of presumptuous, aren’t I?”
“Of course you’re not. You’re my guest here. I don’t expect you to go hungry. What do I have in there anyway?”
She stuck her nose in the fridge. “Ha. Bacon and eggs. The perfect comfort food, and something I can actually make.” She pulled the food out of the refrigerator. “Where do you keep your skillets?”
“I have no idea.”
“You don’t make your breakfast?”
“One of my men brings me a massive breakfast burrito in the morning, compliments of his wife.”
“I see. Well, if you don’t mind me being a nosy Nellie, I’ll just look around until I find what I need.”
“Like I said, I want you to make yourself at home.”
Melanie found the skillet she was looking for, and soon my kitchen smelled like the country ranch house when we were kids. I half expected to look outside and see a beautiful orange sunrise rather than the night sky. This was how the house smelled every morning when Mama was alive, before—
Damn. No matter what happened, it always came back to that. Before Talon’s abduction. Back when my mother was my mother, and we three boys were her life.
Wendy Madigan had told Talon and me that our mother had been mentally ill. Part of me didn’t doubt that. Mentally fit people didn’t normally kill themselves. But she had been such a good mother. Devoted to her children, to our father, to the ranch. But that was all before…
Before…
About ten minutes later, Melanie set a plate in front of me filled with scrambled eggs and three slices of bacon. “I hope you’re hungry.”
I wasn’t sure when I had eaten last, and I found that I was famished. I gobbled up the food in short order.
I didn’t want to bring up Melanie’s kidnapping, but I did need to know what was going on. “Have the police contacted you again? Do they have any idea what happened?”
“No. I haven’t heard anything. It hasn’t been very long yet. I’m just hoping they can find the place where I was held. I gave them a detailed account—well, as detailed as I can remember, with my adrenaline freaking me out—of where I had driven from when I escaped.”
“It’s too late now. You won’t be hearing anything more tonight.”
“Oh.” She stood. “Totally forgot something for us to drink. I suppose it’s too late for a pot of coffee, although that’s what this meal screams for.”
“There’s probably some orange juice in the fridge. Or we can drink water. Or make some tea.”
“OJ sounds perfect.” She rooted around in my kitchen again until she found two glasses.
The scene before me—Melanie in my kitchen, making herself at home—looked more than good to me.
It looked right. It felt right.
If only I hadn’t failed her.
She set a glass of orange juice before me, and I drank it down in one gulp. When was the last time I had drunk something? The martini with Talon last night. I was clearly dehydrated.
I was restless. Being with Melanie had given me some solace, but I had no right to ask her to make love again. There was only one other thing that would give me the peace I craved—a midnight swim.
“Would you like to go for a swim with me?” I asked.
“It’s dark out. And isn’t it too cold?”
“You’ve been in my pool before. It’s heated. But if you’re too cold, you can get in the hot tub while I have a swim.”
S
he looked at her palms. “I guess my hands will be all right. I’ll need more Band-Aids.”
“As I told you, I have tons of first aid supplies.”
“I have to admit, swimming would be great for my ankle in its condition. Of course, I don’t have a suit…”
I laughed aloud. “And we’ve been through that before too. This is my house. No one’s going to interrupt us.”
“That’s what you said the last time.”
She had me there. And that was what had led to—
I didn’t want to think about it. I just wanted to get into my swimming pool and enjoy the night with the woman I loved.
“Will you be all right in here alone then? I really would like to swim.”
“I’m being silly, aren’t I?” She shook her head. “It’s just that…when Jade and Talon showed up, and I got embarrassed, that’s why I left, and then… It was all so silly, really. But this was all my fault, Jonah.”
Her fault? It was my fault. I hadn’t answered her phone call. “This is not your fault. That man had no right to do what he did. And if it takes me the rest of my days, I’ll find out who did it and why, and I will make sure that he rues the day he ever laid a hand on you.”
“I can’t ask you to do that.”
“Who said you were asking?”
“Jonah, your plate is so full already with running the ranch and trying to unravel Talon’s history. You can’t take mine on as well.”
“Who says I can’t? We will figure it all out, Melanie. I promise. But right now, would you please take a swim with me?”
She smiled, and her beautiful emerald eyes lit with green fire. “All right. Like I always tell my patients, if you fall off the bike, get back on.” She stood and came to me, gazing down. “I can’t thank you enough for letting me stay here for a while.”
“Please don’t worry about that. I want to help. It’s the least I can do.”
If she only knew.
I stood beside her, and together we walked out onto the deck and down the walkway to my swimming pool. I shed my jeans and dived in naked. The water was warm yet crisp against the night air.