by Lana Grayson
“I’m in one piece, but I have to talk to you.”
“I’ve got a lot of shit to deal with right now. Later.”
“No.” My head hurt too much to deal with him. I wasn’t getting delicate with a man who had yet to wash all the blood from his hands. “Now, Thorne. It’s important.”
He led me away with a profanity, but at least he listened. We locked the door to Pixie’s office and Thorne sat at the desk. He held his head for a moment, suffering a headache we both shared.
“Scotch?” I asked.
“Dead.”
“What the hell happened?”
“You were there.”
I shouldn’t have been. I couldn’t keep having the same argument with him. I sighed.
“ATF picked me up.”
He swore. He rubbed the exhaustion from his eyes but saw the same future I did. “Did you talk?”
“I know better than that,” I said. “But they’re looking into me. Threatening me. They held me for thirty-six hours to get me to talk. Who the hell knows what kind of bullshit charges they’ll trump up to make a deal.”
“You ain’t taking a deal.”
“I trusted you. I thought you would show some restraint. I have two dead men in my club, and they’re shutting Sorceress down for a federal investigation.”
“They won’t pin anything on you.”
“But the damage is done. My club is closed. They’ll tie me up in so much red tape I’ll end up dancing for the City Council members just to get my licenses restored.”
“Price of doing business, Lyn. I can’t help you.”
“What about my girls?”
“Screw your girls. The smart ones will get out. The ones left behind can get high with Keep.”
“You’re such a bastard.” I slammed my hands on the desk. “Do you know what I’ve sacrificed for this club? What I’ve dealt with?”
“Men died last night, Lyn.”
“Lucky them. What do we do about those of us still living?”
Thorne snorted. “I’m doing my best to keep everyone alive—my men and my old lady.”
“It’s not enough. We have a major problem with The Coup and Temple.”
“Christ, I thought you liked to play with fire.”
“Yeah, but I stay on the edge of hell. I don’t fall in,” I said. “We can’t go to war with The Coup and hope to stand a chance against Temple.”
Thorne smirked. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think Knight grew some tits and came here to nag me.”
“And that’s why you should listen to me. Luke wanted to unite the clubs, so we could protect everyone from Temple.”
“Was he going to suggest it before or after his men opened fire?”
I defended Luke to the one man who hated him the most. That scared me as much as suddenly seeing his perspective a little too clearly. “Why did you let Keep shoot his mouth off?”
“Because the drugs have a better hold on him than I do. Without Brew around to control him, Keep doesn’t have a chance. He fucked up because he is fucked up.”
“All the more reason to control your men.”
“They are under control.”
“Like hell,” I said. “You let Brew kill Blade, but no one stopped to think about the consequences.”
“Did you want Blade to live? Did you want him going after Rose?”
“Of course not. But we weren’t prepared for what would happen.” The secret of the traitor twisted in my stomach. “Listen to me. You need to take a good, hard look at your men and figure out what’s happening in their heads. They’re hearing a lot of rumors. A lot of reasons why Blade is dead that nobody knows. All you need is one man to get the wrong idea.”
“Thanks, Lyn. And the next time my guys need advice on their thongs, I’ll send them to you.”
He wasn’t listening. I knew he wouldn’t. Christ, I hated to expose Luke’s secret messenger, but I didn’t have a choice. How the hell were any of us supposed to survive with a traitor running wild? It wasn’t a man doing what he thought was right by his family and his club.
This was someone far more dangerous.
“There’s a rat in Anathema.”
That got his attention. Thorne leaned closer, the chair creaking as his body tensed.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
I braced for the anger. His eyes darkened. Hard. I never thought I’d miss the charming blue of Luke’s gaze, but faced with the cold brutality of a man more warlord than hero, I could have done with a little storybook.
“There’s a traitor in Anathema,” I said. “And this time it isn’t Brew.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Luke had messages delivered to him. Locations. Routes. Numbers of men. He knew everything about every job you guys did in the past month.”
“Who told you that?”
“Luke.”
“Before or after his cock popped out of your mouth?”
There were few times in my life when I was knocked speechless. Fortunately, my eyebrow expressed enough of my displeasure.
“Lyn, are you part of Anathema?” Thorne posed the question with a scowl. “Sit with us at church? Head out on jobs?”
“Don’t you patronize me.”
“You don’t wear a cut. Hell, you hardly wear anything. You are not a member of this club.”
“So that means I’m blind to all the shit happening?”
“It means you don’t get a say in it.”
“God forbid I open my mouth and try to help you, Thorne. We have a deal, you and me.”
“Sorceress is separate from Anathema. You wanted it that way, you got it.”
“Listen to me. I know I’m not crushing my balls on a bike in the middle of the night, but I’m telling you there’s a problem. There is a traitor in direct contact with Luke. And if you don’t find that rat—”
“You think I’d endanger my club?”
“I don’t know what you’re doing right now, but it’s not protecting Anathema. You need help. And I’m offering it. I can keep ATF off our asses, but you have to do something about The Coup—”
“Lyn, you don’t got a clue what’s happening here. This ain’t Sorceress.”
“Of course not. Sorceress is closed. Because of you.”
“Then you better find a new bar to dance on real quick, Your Highness. Don’t tell me how to run my club. If you want to help, get your ass out there with Rose and take care of our people. Keep them happy and safe. They respect you, and Rose needs to learn how to do this from someone.”
“It won’t matter. If you don’t find the traitor, they’re all going to die.”
Thorne stood. I didn’t let him intimidate me, though my stomach pitted all the same.
“Enough,” he said. “I let you speak to me like that because you and I go way back. But that ends now. We’re about to go to war. I can’t have you mouthing off while I’m leading these men—men who just lost their secretary, vice president, and Scotch.” He stared me down. “You want to help? Do a dance to keep my men happy. Get your girls to do your dirty work if you don’t feel like sucking a cock.”
“What gives you the right to talk to me like that—?”
“I’ve always had the right. The times have changed, Lyn. A corset and hooker boots can’t protect you, and neither can I if you don’t get in line. Don’t like it? Get out. And don’t let the door hit that beautiful ass on the way out.”
I had experienced a lot of misery this past year. I’d killed men who might have killed me. I’d held my girls after they had been mistreated by bikers in cuts. I’d cradled Rose as she sobbed in my arms, revealing more horrible abuses by her Blade than Brew or Keep or even Thorne knew happened.
But I never once regretted my life with the Anathema MC.
Until now.
Until I realized how much I sacrificed pushing Luke from my life, and how little I got in return for protecting Anathema from ATF. It wasn’t a hard dec
ision. I should have made it long ago.
“I wondered why a nice girl like Rose would fall for a man like you.” I let the implication hang. “It’s because you’re all dick.”
I didn’t bother to say goodbye as I left Pixie for the last time.
Someone broke into my apartment, and they weren’t very subtle.
My door’s handle was busted. It didn’t take a strong boot, only a dedicated kick. Oh well. I wasn’t getting my deposit back without flashing my cut anyway.
My apartment wasn’t the greatest digs, but it did the job. Gave me a new address, a safe place across the River where I could hide from Anathema. I rarely stayed there, and most people in the neighborhood knew better than to give my place any trouble.
Most people.
I drew my gun to enter my own home. If that wasn’t a realization that a man’s life wasn’t worth the bullet in the gun, nothing would teach me.
The living room light clicked on. A pair of legs stretched over my couch. Her black leather boots inched all the way up her thighs. The skirt just barely touched where they ended.
Lyn arched an eyebrow. Her hair fell in thick, blonde waves over pale skin. The corset was crimson, blood red. Dangerous enough to tempt a man into fantasy. She brushed one perfectly manicured nail over her troublemaker red lips and appraised me like it was the first time she ever laid those radioactive eyes on my sorry ass.
“Welcome home, dear.” She didn’t mean it. “Dinner’s in the oven.”
Great. So she meant to fight. I wasn’t in the mood.
“Where the fuck have you been?” I ripped my jacket off. “I thought something happened to you. No one’s seen you for two days.”
“I had a little business to take care of.” She rose from the couch with the grace of an assassin. Probably the motivation too. “You know how it is. Another day, another dollar, another encounter with ATF. But enough about me. Tell me about your day, darling.”
“What the hell has gotten into you? Did you break into my apartment?”
“I thought that was allowed?”
“I broke into yours because I thought you were in trouble.”
“Maybe I was checking on you too?” Lyn encroached, each step of the thigh-high boots ticking against my floors like a time bomb. “Maybe I thought this war spilled over. Maybe I wanted to make sure you weren’t dead in the street.”
“I’m alive and kicking. Unless you plan to kill me.” It wasn’t out of the realm of possibilities.
“I’m not here to kill you.”
“This isn’t a social call.”
“Do you have any idea what you’ve done?”
“Here we go.” I set my gun on the counter but thought better of leaving it loaded around Lyn. “What did I do this time?”
“It’s not a this time problem. It’s all the time. It’s this goddamned club. It’s this fucking war.”
“Don’t blame this on me. Keep’s the one who acted out.”
“They stripped Keep of his secretary patch. Said he was unstable.”
“He is.”
“When are you going to do that for your guys?” She posed the question like it was something I could feasibly do. “Half of your men are lunatics anyway. The rest are degenerates. Traitors.”
“And I suppose I’m to blame?”
“Of course you are. You’ve always been to blame. You were the cause of everything. It’s your fault the club split. It’s your fault your brothers are dead. It’s your fault The Coup even exists.”
This wasn’t Lyn. She didn’t pace because she was irritated. She didn’t run her hands through her hair and brush the frustration from the loose curls. She didn’t stalk me an eleven o’clock at night just to list my faults.
Something was wrong.
And she did have dinner in the oven—a goddamned casserole.
What the hell was going on?
“You have no idea how many problems you’ve caused,” she said. “How many decisions I’ve had to make. What I’ve lost because you decided to leave Anathema.”
“I got a good idea.”
“I wasted an entire year of my life trying not to think of you. It broke my heart to hear your name because I had to pretend not to care about you. When in reality?” She heaved a breath, her words coming quicker the more upset she got. “I wasn’t upset that you left Anathema. I was devastated because you left me. And I couldn’t go with you. I couldn’t give up what I had. I did what I thought was right because I had the club and my girls and a loyalty to Anathema.”
“You say it like that’s a bad thing.”
She prowled around me. “I hated you for leaving.”
“Still hate me?”
“More than ever.”
“Then why are you here?”
“Maybe I had to tell you that?”
“Maybe. But that’s not the reason a beautiful woman breaks into my apartment late at night.”
“You’re lucky it’s me and not one of Thorne’s men. Not one of Temple’s men.”
I realized that. It was why I carried a gun at my hip. “If it’s dangerous here, why did you stay?”
“It’s dangerous everywhere, Luke. For me. For you. There’s not a safe place left in the world, so why shouldn’t I be here?”
She hunted me. Staring me down. Most of the times I imagined her in my apartment, she wasn’t mad. She was something else. Just as wild. Just as untamed.
But in that fantasy, the princess was mine.
Lyn stood before me, but those thigh-high boots did nothing to edge her against my full height. No matter how much confidence she had or the lip she used to get her way, Lyn was just a sparkler in a batch of M80s. She liked to burn, but she could only simmer a man below his belt.
Problem was, she didn’t realize it. Thought her corset was bulletproof.
It did the opposite. It made her vulnerable to a man like me. Someone tired of her condescension and distance. Someone who’d tasted her, wanted her, but was unceremoniously dismissed from her life because Her Highness had a change of heart.
She wanted me gone. I left.
I had enough to fight for without groveling on my knees for the opportunity to suffer under her spell once more.
And yet she was all I could think about. Every moment of the damned day, my heart pumped just for the chance to see her again. I breathed only so I could whisper her name before a kiss or take her violet scent with me to the grave.
Men took aim at me. Chaos reigned. And none of it mattered.
Because I didn’t have Lyn.
Because I feared something happened to her. Because I thought the worst decision I made in my life harmed the one person I never meant for it to hurt. The only person betrayed who didn’t deserve the betrayal.
The only one I loved.
“What are you doing here, Lyn?” I made fists just to prevent myself from reaching for her. She was close enough that I might’ve thrown her onto the couch. Taken what we denied ourselves days ago. “This isn’t a safe place for you.”
In more ways than one.
“Always trying to save me, aren’t you, Luke?” Her voice wavered between enraged and trembling. “My knight in shining armor. My protector.”
“If you want me to apologize for keeping you safe—”
“You rescued me from the wrong things.”
“Why? What do you need to be saved from?”
“You.”
“I’d never hurt you.”
“You already have.”
“Lyn—”
She launched at me, throwing her arms around my neck. She pressed hard against my chest. Those soft curves melded against me.
I wasn’t prepared for her kiss, but I wasn’t idiot enough to let her go.
Fuck, she was warm.
Even in that ridiculous corset. Even with that thin leather separating my palm from her ass, she blazed with heat and punished with the searing swipe of her tongue against my lip.
Her body arched. Her breath beca
me frantic pants, whispering my name.
Begging me to return her kiss.
I didn’t have a damn choice. My cock made the decisions that my head refused to understand.
She had kicked me out of her penthouse, her bed, her life. But the woman grinding against me wasn’t conflicted. No more tears. No more indecision.
One of her hands dug into my cut and the other cupped my cock through my jeans, squeezing to feel how goddamned badly I wanted this woman for my own.
I had her before. Tasted her. Wanted her. Too many times she got away. Too many times I let her walk without burying my cock completely within her and losing myself in that perfect pussy. I watched her dance, and I knew that tightness, and I tasted that sweetness. It wasn’t some chivalric test. This was pure, tormenting sin preventing me from taking what was mine.
No more.
I gripped her arms and pushed her into the wall, hard enough to shake the lamps and crush her too violently in my grasp. I might have apologized, but she stole the words as she sucked hard against my tongue. Her nails scratched down my arms, nearly breaking skin.
Fuck, this wasn’t going to be gentle.
Or soft.
Or any of the ways I once planned to seduce a woman more demon queen than quivering lover.
“I’m gonna be rough, Princess.” I warned her. My teeth anchored over her throat, biting the soft skin between her neck and shoulder. She squealed. I bit harder. “I need you too damn much.”
“Your fault.” Her words gasped with every nip to her flesh. I bit too hard, but that only drew a frantic groan from her swollen lips. “You left Anathema, you left me. You might have had this long ago.”
“Don’t blame me.” I’d never get her tits out of the corset. She strapped herself in just to tease me. I might have sliced the damn leather off if I hadn’t liked her pinned inside her own clothing. “You could have asked for this. All you needed to say was Luke, fuck me, and I’d have bent you over wherever the fuck you were.”
Lyn’s eyes flashed an impish green. “Had I only known.”
I growled. “Did you ever think about this cock?”
“Every minute of the day.”
“You want it?” I pushed against her, letting the hardness grind against her hip.