by Max Monroe
The crowd of employees clapped as Melissa got down on her knees and agreed to all sorts of things, but Cynthia’s eyes never released mine. They had the intensity of a hawk as she summoned me into her office with a flick of her fingers.
I crossed the space and entered the room with ease, taking a seat in the chair across from her desk and trying to wipe the smile off my face. I felt like I’d been called to the principal’s office to be reprimanded at my own school.
“Mr. Brooks—” she started, and I immediately cut in. Her voice was tense enough for the both of us.
“Relax, Cynthia. Everyone seemed to enjoy it.”
“Right. Everyone seemed to enjoy it. Until you find out about meek little Britney, the new intern who just experienced a date rape at college and now fears for her safety from pursuit at work.”
“Jesus. That’s terrible. When did we hire her? Is she okay? Do you think we need to set up some kind of—”
“There’s no Britney.”
“What?”
“I made her up,” she clarified.
“Fuck, Cynthia. You just made that shit up? That’s awful. Why on earth is that the scenario living in your mind?”
“Because it could happen.”
“I hope not.” Jesus. I had chest pain just thinking about imaginary Britney and her awful ordeal.
“We need to put a no fraternization policy in the new hire contract.”
“Cyn—”
“This is why. That was innocent to you, but it’s not innocent to everyone.”
“I appreciate where you’re coming from and this is a prime example of why I will forever entrust you as Director of Human Resources.”
“But?” she questioned with a hand going straight to her hip.
I scrubbed a hand down my face in frustration. “Just give me a minute to think this through before you go guns blazing and drop kick John’s lovesick ass out the door.”
“Fine. But, you can expect twenty-four hours of silence on my end and then, I won’t stop bothering you for a resolution.”
Jesus, this woman almost had as much bite as my Georgie when she was fired up.
I left the office that day feeling sick over the entire situation. Neither John nor Melissa deserved any bullshit reprimands for being attracted to one another.
Hell, if anything, John deserved an award for his persistence and Melissa deserved a million dollars for staying strong as long as she did.
I called Georgia on my way home that night, giving her the down and dirty on John’s explicit lyrics and Cynthia’s overall irritation. She had been in San Diego for the past week while the Mavericks played the Chargers and I was more than ready for her to be home.
“Man, she’s a bit of a hardass,” Georgia responded. “Honestly, I’m surprised she didn’t sue you for going through her files to find out I was Rose.”
“Truer words have never been spoken, Benny.”
“What are you going to do?”
I stared out the window as Frank maneuvered through traffic. “I miss you. And I was kind of hoping my beautiful, brilliant wife would have the answer to that question.”
“Aw, I miss you too, baby. But don’t worry, I’ll be heading home in less than twenty-four hours.”
“Thank fuck for that.”
She giggled. “But seriously, what are you going to do? Cynthia won’t let this one go.”
“What do you think I should do?”
“Well…I actually think the whole thing is pretty goddamn adorable. It makes me miss working with everyone. God, I bet Dean was beside himself when John was serenading Melissa.”
“Pretty sure I saw him recording it. And baby?”
“Yeah?” she asked, voice soft.
“There’s always a job offer waiting for you. You say the word and I’ll send over the contract.”
She laughed. “Pretty sure that’s offer number three for the day, Brooks.”
“There’s a reason they say third time’s the charm.”
“Not this time. And you should probably think about limiting yourself to one offer a day,” she pointed out.
“What can I say? I’m persistent and highly motivated by the idea of mid-afternoon sex in my office with my insanely hot wife on a daily basis.”
“I’ve got two ideas for you. You ready to hear them?”
“If one of them includes you naked, yes.”
“Monday afternoon, I’ll stop by your office and show you some of my very best moves.”
“Fuck, yes. And please, for the love of God, wear my favorite black stilettos.”
“Deal,” she agreed on a giggle. “Okay and now to idea number two. Let John go. Give him one hell of a severance package and tell him to apply for the new position that just opened with the Mavericks. Tell him it comes with great benefits, more than he’s currently getting paid, and tickets to any NFL game he wants to see.”
“How big of a severance package?”
“If I were in Melissa’s shoes, I’d hope it would big enough for a big fat engagement ring, my dream wedding, and one hell of a honeymoon.”
“What in the fuck kind of shoes does Melissa wear? Louboutins?”
She laughed. “I’m telling Dean you said that.”
I sighed. “You really think that’s the best option?”
“I think it’s the nicest option. John is a hard worker, but Melissa has been with Brooks Media longer. Plus, what twenty-something guy wouldn’t want to work for an NFL team?”
“Damn you drive you an expensive bargain, woman.”
“You should talk to my husband,” she said with amusement in her voice. “It took him offering to sign over his entire company to convince me to marry him.”
I chuckled fondly at her twist on the sequence of events. “Your husband sounds like a genius.”
“Yeah,” she agreed. “His brain is almost as big as his cock.”
“Keep talking like that and I’ll be on the first flight out to San Diego,” I growled into the phone.
“How about a video chat tonight once I’m all tucked into my hotel suite?”
“Consider me hard and ready, baby.”
Three months later, Georgia and I were seated in attendance at John and Melissa’s lavish wedding inside The Plaza Hotel in New York. Candles lit the room with a warm ambience, lush flowers filled the space with an exquisite aroma, and the bride was blushing and beautiful in her wedding gown and veil.
John stood proudly at the altar, listening to Melissa recite her hand-written vows, and his eyes were over-flowing with the kind of sentiment only a groom desperately in love with his bride could portray.
“And each day, you would do things that would make me fall more and more, until I not only realized I was in love in with you, but that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you, John. I will always love you, no matter what obstacles may come our way because you’re my best friend.”
The groom smiled down at his bride as he cupped her cheeks and swiped a few tears from beneath her eyes, mouthing, “I love you.”
When the minister said, “You may kiss the bride,” John didn’t hold back, shouting, “Fuck yes!” as he wrapped Melissa up in his arms and kissed the hell out of her.
Everyone in attendance cheered, clapped, and laughed as Melissa and John walked down the aisle, hand-in-hand, and their newlywed eyes filled with nothing but love for one another.
And do you want to know the ironically funny thing about the sequence of events that led to John and Melissa’s three-month courtship turned marriage?
Remember that severance package Georgia told me to offer John?
When he asked me what he should tell everyone at Brooks Media about his abrupt exit, I responded with, “Hell, I don’t care. Tell them you won the lottery.”
As a joke, I tossed in a few lottery tickets to make him laugh, but the joke was on me.
That lucky bastard hit the motherfucking jackpot.
Not only did John’s severance package fr
om Brooks Media make him thirty million dollars richer, but it allowed the happy couple to quit their jobs and spend their days traveling the world.
Rome. Paris. Amsterdam. Hawaii. Costa Rica. Greece. Sri Lanka.
Those were just a few of the destinations they’d managed in the past three months. And after they enjoyed their reception, they would be on the first flight to Belize to start the first half of the four-month long honeymoon.
Georgie and I couldn’t have been happier for them.
Mazel tov!
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