“Other boyfriends?” Jeff didn’t want to know. But then again, he couldn’t bear not to know either. “I didn’t think Eddie had ever been serious with anyone before.”
“Well, no, he hasn’t been serious with them, but they’ve always seemed smitten with him. That’s how he manages to manipulate them. But you, I figured you’d be a tougher one for him to charm. Especially with the whole not-being-gay thing.”
“But I just told you I was.”
“Really? Because the way you look at women, I’d never have guessed.”
“How do I look at women?”
“Like you want to cover them in whipped cream and eat them up.”
“I do?” Jeff thought about it. “I’m not into sploshing. As far as I know.” Getting all sticky with foodstuffs didn’t really appeal to him, although if Eddie suggested it, he’d probably want to give it a try.
But only if it was with custard. Yum.
“Okay, then, you look at women like you want to strap them down, smack their cunts and then eat them out. Is that a better image for you?”
“Yeah. I suppose.” Jeff had wanted to do those exact things, hadn’t he? And so maybe he still did. But right now, he couldn’t imagine doing kinky stuff with anyone but Eddie.
“Jeff, you don’t just suddenly turn gay overnight. You’re probably just a bit bi, that’s all. Well, join the club. I mean, if any bloke’s going to turn an otherwise straight bloke’s head, it’s Eddie. I certainly enjoyed fucking him.”
If Jeff hadn’t already been sitting down, he’d have collapsed at that point. As it was, he just opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to think of some way of responding to that. “You didn’t,” was what eventually came out. Please tell me you didn’t!
“Yeah, it was how I met Maddy. Me and Eddie used to have this thing. Well, it wasn’t anything serious on my part—I was just experimenting. Seeing if I preferred a male to a female sub.”
“You met Maddy while you were shagging Eddie.” It was a horrifying thought, for reasons Jeff wasn’t about to analyse.
“Not literally while. Well, sort of. We were only weekend playmates for a few months. I took him to this club, and Maddy was there. They’ve been best mates since forever. And I ended up leaving the club with her rather than him. He was pretty pissed off with me at the time, although he phoned to apologise the next day. He’s that kind of bloke, you know? Doesn’t hold a grudge.”
Eddie might not, but Jeff was fast discovering that he did. Although who exactly he held it against he couldn’t rightly tell.
“Why didn’t you tell me any of this?”
“None of your business, really.”
“I think it is. You know, if Eddie’s some kind of tart, out to seduce straight men.”
Niall snorted. “Oh come on, it was hardly like that. I approached him on Fetlife and set up a meeting. I wanted to try things out with a man. And anyway, I identify as bi, not straight. Although I’d say I was only about twenty percent bi.”
“There are percentages?” You could write down the sum total of what Jeff knew about bisexuality on the back of an envelope. He had a lot to learn. But maybe this was a good thing. After all, if he was bi, he might only be a little bit gay after all. “How do you know what percentage you are? Is there a test?”
Now Niall really was laughing. Jeff bristled. “A test? I expect you could find a Kinsey test online somewhere, but I just came up with what felt right for me. Eight times out of ten, I’d rather be with a woman, but sometimes I’m attracted to men.”
“Men like Eddie.”
“Exactly.” Niall raised his glass like a toast, but Jeff couldn’t see anything there to be happy about. Was Eddie really that desirable to other men? Was Jeff going to have to beat them off with a stick? Or would he just have to face up to the fact Eddie would never be interested in a bloke like him? Beyond the sex, that was. It wasn’t like Jeff could offer the kind of lifestyle Niall could, with his huge house, well-equipped dungeon and fancy cars. The best Jeff could offer was a terraced miner’s cottage, a sad little suitcase of toys, and a beat-up, smelly old truck full of mud.
No, Eddie would be better off with a man like Niall, and he’d have to know that himself. Jeff had better not get too attached. And really, if he was only a certain percentage bisexual, then it would be dumb to get all invested in a man, wouldn’t it? Especially one who didn’t do serious relationships. Jeff should keep that in mind. He should keep going to the socials and keep his eye out for a woman. Once Eddie had finished his training, Jeff would have the confidence to approach them and get it right, wouldn’t he?
Yes, once Eddie had finished his training.
Just two more sessions, and Jeff could get back to a normal life. He took a deep breath and tried to force his head straight.
“Niall?” Maddy’s call cut through the air between them. “Where are y— Oh, there you are.” Maddy strolled out onto the patio in her amazingly high heels and leant down to give Niall a kiss. And not just a polite peck in front of company either. The two of them looked like they were trying to eat each other’s faces off, and Niall’s hand had worked its way up the back of her skirt by the time Jeff realized he’d have to announce his presence.
He cleared his throat loudly, and Maddy turned her head. “Hey, Jeff. How are you?”
Jesus Christ, how did she manage to make those three simple words sound dirty? Like she knew exactly what he’d been up to with Eddie at the weekend. Then again, maybe she did. Maybe Eddie was the kiss-and-tell type.
Shame he’d never thought to tell Jeff about Niall. Bloody hell, that still hurt.
And he still hadn’t answered Maddy. “Yeah. Fine.” Okay, Maddy was still looking at him like she expected more, and Niall was still fondling her legs like they were alone in the bedroom. Not that she seemed remotely fazed. Would Eddie like being handled like that in front of other people? And would Jeff enjoy doing it?
But he had to make conversation. He couldn’t just sit here, transfixed by the sight of the two of them canoodling. “Oh yeah. Congratulations. How’s the baby?”
It was the right thing to say as Maddy settled down on Niall’s lap and seemed perfectly happy to chatter on about scans and morning sickness. Jeff let it all wash over him.
I want some of that.
He wanted that closeness, that casual intimacy that poured off the two of them in their little touches and shared glances. Like they were speaking to each other through a whole secret language no one else could ever hope to share.
Yes, finding himself a woman would be the best thing to do, because he could never hope to have that with Eddie. Two men never found that level of closeness, did they? Well, not in Jeff’s experience, anyway.
Although with every day that passed, he was starting to realise just how little experience he had. And he wanted more. Lots more.
Chapter Nineteen
On Saturday morning, Eddie pulled up around the corner from Jeff’s house, not wanting to brave the parking on his road. It was the first time he’d been here during the day. In fact, it was the first time he’d been here without following Jeff back from the pub.
Bloody hell. It was only the third time he’d been here in total. Felt like they’d known each other for a lot longer than they had. Maybe it wasn’t the amount of time you spent with someone that counted, but rather the intensity of the time you spent with them.
That’d go some way towards explaining the weird feeling he had in the pit of his stomach. Nerves and excitement all rolled into one squirming ball. It was just the anticipation of getting a good seeing-to. It had to be. Not that he’d ever felt it quite like this before, but it was probably just the natural end result of having spent a week burying himself in his work so he could legitimately take the whole weekend off.
Yep, the whole bloody weekend. Eddie had stowed a micro keg of a strong local ale
inside the suitcase of kink, and he fully intended to drink too much of it to be able to drive home. Jeff would have to ask him to stay the night. He couldn’t avoid it. It was devious, but Eddie didn’t mind stooping to such a low tactic. Not if it meant he got to wake up next to Jeff and have some sleepy morning sex, kink optional.
Eddie’s arsehole clenched in anticipation as he walked down to Jeff’s house. Fuck yes. He was going to be a dirty stop-out and do the walk of shame back down this road in the morning. One of Jeff’s neighbours—a white-haired man in an incongruous knitted hat—sat out on his tiny front lawn, staring at the view. He must have been baking under the midday sun with all those layers on, but he just gave Eddie a nod of acknowledgement and a toothless smile, like he hadn’t a care in the world.
Jeff’s cottage looked even more welcoming in the daytime, with the roses spilling their sweet scent down over him as he walked up to the door. And Jeff must have been waiting for him on the other side, because no sooner had Eddie raised his hand to knock than Jeff was opening the door.
Jeff gave a shy smile, and Eddie let out the grin that he’d been holding in.
Jeff stepped back. Eddie followed him in, and the door slammed shut as Jeff pushed him back against it. He dropped the suitcase. “Fuck, there was beer in there.”
“Don’t care.” Jeff’s eyes glowed with lust, and Eddie let his knees bend to bring him down to the same height. Jeff took full advantage of that, just like he’d hoped, and ransacked his mouth with a spine-tingling, dick-firming kiss.
Oh yeah, someone had been missing him. Eddie kissed Jeff back as fiercely as he’d been dreaming of, pressing his whole body against Jeff’s solid bulk. It was a wonder their clothes didn’t catch fire with the heat building between them. No, scratch that. It was a wonder Eddie’s dick hadn’t burst out of his jeans and rubbed up against its favourite playmate, which was currently trying to drill a hole into Eddie’s thigh.
Bloody hell, Jeff’s dick got harder than any bloke’s he’d ever known. Eddie scrambled for Jeff’s fly, desperate to finally get a good feel of it. He’d had it in his mouth and his arse now, but he still hadn’t had a chance to explore it properly with his hands. And it had never touched his own dick. Would that be too gay for Jeff? Only one way to find out.
Eddie attacked Jeff’s fly and then his own, freeing their cocks at almost the same time. He kissed Jeff ferociously all the while, not giving him time to object as he grabbed hold of Jeff’s cock and brought it to his own.
Oh! So hard and sweaty slick. Eddie wrapped a hand around them both, and rather than stop kissing him, Jeff made a hungry noise and reached down to grab Eddie’s buttocks, squeezing them hard.
Yeah, this was a time for fast and dirty. They could get the toys out later. Eddie tested Jeff’s grip by leaning his weight on him, then gave in to what he’d been wanting to do and wrapped both his legs around Jeff’s middle. Now he was suspended from Jeff’s body, hanging on to his sturdy frame and letting it take his weight, with only the door against his back giving any other support.
Felt so fucking amazing, being able to do that. Eddie bucked his hips and pumped his hand, determined to bring them both off before Jeff’s grip gave way.
Their cocks slid together in his hand, the ridge on Jeff’s giving just the right amount of friction as Eddie thrust his hips.
Jeff broke the kiss, panting. “Fuck! Oh shit, that’s good.” He buried his head against Eddie’s shoulders, and his whole body convulsed. His dick pulsed in Eddie’s hand as wet heat burst against his stomach.
Eddie fucked into his hand, lubricated by Jeff’s come. “So good,” he agreed, before the pleasure barrelled through him and shot out the end of his dick.
“Ungh.” It wasn’t the most articulate summing up of the situation, but it was all he could currently manage as his legs slipped down over Jeff’s bum. He clung on to Jeff’s neck and let them fall.
“Fuck me,” Jeff wheezed.
The urge to do just that nearly bubbled up—Eddie didn’t mind topping every now and again, especially if the other bloke was still in charge in some way. And who knew? Jeff might love having a cock rammed up his arse. Eddie certainly did. But instead he just chuckled. “Hi. How’s things?”
“All better now.” Jeff bared his teeth to nip at Eddie’s neck, giving him a delightful shiver. “How about you?”
“I’m grand, thanks.” Eddie peered over Jeff’s shoulder. “Hey, you’re rearranged your living room. I like it.” The absurdity of chatting with their soggy dicks pressed together up against the front door hadn’t escaped Eddie, but if Jeff wanted polite chitchat, he could have it.
“Do you like runner beans?” Jeff asked.
It took a moment for Eddie’s brain to wrap itself around that non sequitur. “To eat? Yep. So long as they’re not overdone. My stepmum had a habit of murdering them.”
“Good. You can help me pick them.” Jeff gave Eddie’s arse a quick squeeze and then stepped back. “Better get yourself looking respectable. Some of the bits of the garden are private, but the neighbours can all see the back door.”
It was pointless feeling let down about that little command. Eddie knew Jeff wasn’t ready to come out. He couldn’t even come out to Eddie and admit he was, at the very least, bisexual. But that didn’t stop the irritation rising as Eddie tucked himself back into his jeans and wiped his hand clean on his T-shirt. “Shit. I should have brought a change of clothes.”
“You look like you’ve brought a whole weekend’s worth of stuff.” Jeff glanced at the suitcase, but Eddie couldn’t for the life of him tell if he disapproved of that.
“Nah. Just beer and toys. It’s step four of my Intro to BDSM class later. I hope you’ve done your homework.”
“I didn’t know I had any.”
Fuck. Eddie never had sent that text in the end, had he? He’d been going to suggest Jeff went and looked up genital torture online—specifically cock and ball torture—but then he’d bottled out, worried it might give Jeff the fear.
And now here he was, about to spring it all on a man who was totally unprepared.
Eddie thought fast. “Figure of speech. But I think I will set some this week. I’ve got plans for next weekend.”
“Our final session.” Jeff’s face was unreadable again, his voice flat. “You said five in total, didn’t you?”
“I did.” Ask me for more. Ask me for more.
But Jeff just pulled a face and turned away. “Come on. Let’s go pick beans.
Jeff strode out of his back door, not looking back to check if Eddie was following. That had been so fucking confusing. That whatever-it-was they’d just done at his front door. Resentment seethed inside Jeff, but he hadn’t a clue why. Maybe it was just at the way Eddie made him feel. All messed up. It had been easier yesterday. Much simpler to imagine a humdrum straight life without Eddie in it.
Strangely enough, it had been easier to imagine himself alone. His mind refused to put a girl in the picture. Perhaps the whole thing with Sarah had just rocked his confidence a bit. Yeah, that was it. He’d get back in the swing of things eventually. Get back on the horse that threw him.
The thought of riding Eddie hard—whacking him with the crop all the while—made him groan. He paused under the rose arch, resting in the shade to help cool him down. Overheated and horny, that was all he was. These gay fantasies would pass eventually, and he’d remember how to fantasise about shagging women.
Maybe he should watch some straight porn. That might help. Yeah, he’d do that later after Eddie had gone home. That one on his hard drive with the woman with the huge tits and gorgeous white skin, being fucked by all those men with huge, veiny cocks…
“Hey, this is beautiful!” Eddie’s voice made Jeff start, guiltily. Did it count as being unfaithful in the mind if you thought about other men’s cocks? Sarah certainly hadn’t been happy when she caught him watching porn.
But you couldn’t be unfaithful to someone you weren’t in a relationship with, could you? So thinking about other blokes’ cocks was fine. Right. Good thing he had that sorted.
“Earth to Jeff? You all right there, mate?”
“Yeah.” Jeff’s voice cracked as he realised what a weirdo he must seem, spacing out like that. “Um, yeah, fine. Just checking the roses for black spot.” He pulled a handy leaf out, turning it over to examine it.
Eddie reached out to touch the leaf, and his arm brushed against Jeff’s. “What are we looking for? No, let me guess. Is the name a hint?”
“Yep. They’re black spots on the leaves, and they spread like crazy once they get started. It’s a fungal disease, and they should be okay in this dry weather, but you can never be too careful.”
“You really do know your plants, don’t you? Is this all your handiwork?”
“Yep. Sarah liked sunbathing, but she didn’t really want to put any work in on the garden. You should see the rest of it.”
Jeff led the way from the upper patio section, down a couple of steps and into the vegetable patch. He walked the pathway between the raised beds, pausing every few steps to examine the squash plants trailing over the edge, and pinching out the tips of the shoots that had already set fruit.
“Wow! You really grew all this? My stepmum’s garden never looked this good. She used to plant everything in straight rows. You’ve got it all jammed in together.”
“Some things are still in rows,” Jeff said absently as he picked the greenfly off a pea shoot.
“Yeah, but not in the same way. Not with these raised-up beds. Do you mind if I take some pictures? She’s getting kind of arthritic now, and I bet she’d find something like this much easier to manage than having to stoop down to the ground all the time.”
“Yep. Knock yourself out.”
How to Train Your Dom in Five Easy Steps Page 17